February 16th, 1998

Los Angeles, CA

I didn’t think this day would come.

After flying into Los Angeles late last night it finally hit me what was happening and I couldn’t be any more excited. It was finally February 16th! My movie and single were being released today!

I all ready felt like I was going to bounce off the walls of happiness. It was what kept me up until about two in the morning when I finally crashed. I didn’t know what time it was but I knew it was some ungodly hour when I heard knocking at the door.

“Go away,” I grumbled, pulling my pillow down over my head to muffle out the knocking on the door. I sighed and tried to go back to sleep when the knocking stop but a second later I could hear the doorknob turning. I figured it was either Todd or Eric, my security, but I was horribly wrong.

The next thing I knew I heard rushing footsteps and then the full blow of heavy body landed on my back. I groaned and tried to push whoever it was on top of me to the ground but I was too tangled up in my sheets. I finally freed my arm and lifted my pillow off of my head, swinging it to hit whoever was on my back.

“Holy bed-head, Batman!” Chris laughed, dodging the pillow that I was trying to hit him with. “Did you get into a fight with a blow dryer?”

“Get off me, you freak,” I grumbled, rubbing my eyes.

He pouted but didn’t move. “We haven’t seen each other in a month and the first thing you do is call me a freak? That’s not nice.”

“And being nice is breaking my back when I’m trying to sleep?” I yawned. “What are you doing here?”

“You invited us, remember?” he asked, knocking on my head with his knuckles. “And I wanted to let you know that we were here.”

I squinted at him before managing to sit up a bit more to look at the clock. It was 7:45 in the morning. 7 fucking 45!  Groaning, I rubbed my eyes and gathered up enough strength to push Chris off the bed as I rolled over. “Dude, I’ve only gotten five hours of sleep. Why wake me up now? Why not surprise me?” I growled. “Nice dreds,” I added.

“Did you see your face? I surprised you enough,” he replied, rubbing his back. “And thank you. Did you eat yet?” He flinched when I glared at him. “Whoops, sorry about that. Anyway, get your clothes on and come down to breakfast with us. We want to know what you’ve been up to.”

“Let me check my schedule,” I said, reaching into the drawer by my bed and pulling out my schedule book. Who knew that your whole day would practically be filled because of one stinkin’ movie premiere? I took a look at my schedule (written in Liam’s slanted handwriting), it didn’t look too bad:

10:00 AM – Phone interviews with Ben

11:00 AM –Press Conference with Ben
12:00 PM - Lunch Break
1:00 PM – Tour Rehearsal with Fatima
3:30 PM – Break (Photo or Interview Opportunity)

4:30 PM – Hair Appointment
5:30 PM - Dinner Break
6:30 PM – Make up and Dressing/Leave hotel
7:00 PM – Walk Red Carpet
8:00 PM – Movie Premiere
10:45–?  PM – After Party

“Ok, just give me five minutes to wake up,” I yawned again.

“Hey, where’d that accent come from?” He asked, pointing right in between my eyes.

“My mouth,” I replied, pushing his finger out of my face. “You can watch TV or something. I just need to shower real fast,” I told him as I pushed back the covers and swung my feet to the floor. I stretched as much as possible, gathered some clothes from my bag, and went into the bathroom. The warm shower helped me wake up a bit and got me reenergized for the day. 

“Did you drown, Princess?” Chris asked through the door.

“You wish,” I replied over the rushing water, soaping my hair. “Your life wouldn’t be as half as interesting if I weren’t in it, Lucky. How was Orlando?” I used to think it was weird talking to Chris through the bathroom door while I was showering but I’ve gotten used to it.

“Warm and smelled like oranges like always,” he replied. “It stormed a lot so you should be happy that you weren’t there. We missed you though.”

“Really? And it was physically impossible for one of you guys to pick up the phone?” I lifted my eyebrows, more out of natural reaction. I bent forward and smiled at the feeling of warm water trickling through my hair before it fell in a single river towards the bottom of the shower.

“We were busy,” he said lamely.

“So was I but I at least made an effort to talk to you guys. The only one I ever caught was Lance. What, were you guys with your girlfriends all the time or something?” I asked.

“Well, yeah kinda,” he admitted. I was joking; I didn’t think that’d be the actual answer. Ditched without even being there physically. That’s a new one for them. I shook my head, erasing the bad thoughts. ‘Don’t dwell on it, girl. They need to see their loved ones too. It’s not like they ignored you on purpose or anything. Don’t go off over nothing.’

“How’re the girls doing?” I managed to ask, flipping my hair back. It made a light wet-sounding smack when it hit my shoulders before I turned off the water. I reached out past the curtain and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around myself and stepped out onto the plush little carpet.

“Great. They’re glad to be out of New York. They liked being in Orlando where it was actually warm for a while. They hung out with each other more than us, though ‘cause they wanted to get perfect tans for tonight,” he laughed.

“Even Bobbie?” I questioned, quickly wrapping my hair in another towel to dry it faster. I wasn’t in the mood to straighten it. “I mean, she doesn’t really fit with Dani, Danielle, or Kelly.”

“Yeah, well she and JC were together by themselves a lot but that’s Jace for ya. He doesn’t like begin with us until he needs us. He’s a user, you know,” Chris joked. “But not of the drug variety. Uh-uh, Golden-Boy Chasez is a user of people. Most people don’t know that because they’re too captivated by his voice or his eyes. But that’s his plan. He’s not that sweet and shy, he’s a mastermind.”

I was in stitches by the time he was done with his explanation. Man I missed his sense of humor. I forgot how easily Chris could make me laugh. Making sure my hair was dry. I pulled on  a hooded t-shirt and jeans. Then I took a comb to attack at my tangled, now wavy, hair. I really wanted to dye my hair again but Liam suggested I waited until after the premiere. I just didn’t know how much of it I wanted to dye. Maybe I’d just cut it shorter.

 Finally I stepped out of the bathroom, tossing the wet towels into a small hotel hamper in the corner of the room. “Ok, direct me towards the most caffeinated drink they have here and I should be happy and peppy for the rest of the day,” I ordered, searching for my shoes. I found my black converse under my bed and went in search for the other one. I couldn’t find it there so I searched through my suitcase, finally giving up and taking out my red converse. I looked down at my feet, twisted my mouth to the side, and pulled on the other shoe. “Let’s go, I’m starving.”

“You read my mind.”

I grabbed my key card and checked to make sure I had everything I needed before opening the door. Chris stepped out into the hall before me and I closed the door. Right as I turned around I was met with green eyes. “Lance!” I exclaimed happily before jumping into his arms.

“Hey! It’s so good to see you again,” Lance said as he squeezed me tight before holding me at arm length. “Look at you. I love your hair. Something different?”

“Not really. My hair gets really wavy when it’s wet but I wasn’t in the mood to straighten it today,” I replied, grinning.

“Wait, is that a southern accent I hear?” he asked with a twinkle in his eye. “It’s very cute.”

“Thanks,” I beamed. “Where are the others?”

“Don’t know. Said they’d meet us at breakfast.”

“What about J?” I asked hopefully.

Lance laughed. “You know him, he’s knocked out. We can wake him up later. He stayed up late ‘cause he was too excited to get here.”

“And the girls?” I asked as we walked down the hall.

“Sleeping.” I nodded and started bouncing a bit. I couldn’t help it I was too excited for the day to start.  Lance laughed. “You sure are peppy this morning.”

“Hey, I’m in L.A. for the first time in my life, my single is out, I’m going to a movie premiere which I never expected to be my own, I wrote two amazing songs in the past week—if I do say so myself—and I finally love my accent. Why wouldn’t I be happy?” I asked.

He shrugged. “Just making sure. I prefer you smiling instead of scowling. What makes it even better is when I put that smile on your face.”

“I hope you say this stuff to Danielle, er, your Danielle.”

“There’s no point, she knows you’re my secret lover and she’s fine with it as long as there’s no kissing or sex of any shape or form involved. Hugging is fine, but I’m sticking to words to profess my love for you, mah share-ee ah-moore,” he said in a really bad fake French accent.

I cringed. “Remind me to give you a lesson.” He laughed and said that he’d hold me to it. Then he looked at me in a peculiar way, the way dogs do as they tilt their heads. “What?” I finally asked with a laugh.

“Nothing,” he replied shaking his head. “It’s just…I’m glad the sweet version of you is finally back. All that stuff going on made her hide.”

“She was bound to make another appearance sooner or later,” I replied, shoving my hands into my pockets. I heard the faint ding before I saw the elevator and that made me walk faster. Now that I was awake I was starving and I needed to get food inside of myself pronto. “Food, food, food, food,” I sang to myself, jabbing the button of the elevator.

“You’re going to break it if you keep poking that thing,” Lance commented from behind me.

“I wouldn’t have to worry about if the damn elevator would get here faster and stop keeping me from my food!” I replied, still pushing the button, with a bit more vigor with each push. “Come on! I need my sugar, you damn elevator. Don’t you know I didn’t get any sleep?” I yelled at it.

“Hey Shorty, it’s an inanimate object, I’m pretty sure it can’t talk.”

“You’re lucky I’m in a good mood this morning or you would’ve been snacking on those front teeth, Beaver Face,” I said, turning around to grin at JC who walked over to us.

“Hmm, name-calling with a smile. You’re really mastering the art of PMSing,” he shot back with a pleasant smile of his own before opening his arms. I gladly stepped into them and hugged him back. “So, movie star, are you ready for your big debut?”

“I’m fine now, just wait until it gets closer to the time. I’m either going to be so nervous I won’t stop talking or I’m going to be so nervous I’ll clam up,” I replied as the elevator dinged, signaling that it arrived. Finally!

“That’ll be a first,” he quipped.

“Shut it!”

“She hasn’t eaten,” Lance explained quickly as we got into the elevator.

 I grunted and jabbed my thumb at the L button. “So where’s your other half?”

“Sleeping,” JC replied. “We had a long flight.”

“Yeah, the flight was long,” Chris snickered. I smiled and elbowed him in the side. I followed them out of the elevator as soon as it hit the bottom floor. This was one of those times where I was glad they weren’t big in the US yet. Sometimes in Europe, Germany especially, the fans would break into the hotels to try and see them and if we went to the hotel’s restaurant to get something to eat we’d be bombarded. It was great to finally get out of an elevator and not go deaf.

Then it occurred to me that if this CD was successful it could happen to me too. I mean, I wasn’t annoyed by it, not in the slightest. It wasn’t every day that you got the chance to meet a celebrity but I was afraid of the price that I’d have to pay. I liked my privacy and the guys seemed to have less of it since they got into the group.

Maybe I was diving into something that was way over my head. Everyone would know my name, my favorite color, my favorite food. Hell, they’d even know everything about me right down to my favorite Skittle (which are the green ones).

That would be so creepy.

“Hey Superstar!”

I lifted my head (I have a bad habit of looking at my feet when I’m walking). “Joey, hi!” I said happily, rushing over to him and giving him a big hug.

“Mmmmwah!” He said loudly as he kissed me on the cheek.

“Yuck! Joe!” I laughed, rubbing my cheek. “Hey!” I added, hugging the girls that got up from the table, exchanging the usual “I missed you”s and “You look great”s.

“So what have you been up to in the past month?” Joey asked.

“Being carted around from city to city doing press and promo and dancing my butt off,” I replied, spinning the ice cubes that were in my drink. “A few times I lost my voice and was put on voice rest. It was torture. Do you know how hard it is not to talk?”

“I’m betting you don’t,” JC commented with a teasing smile. I chuckled. “How were rehearsals without Fatima? You haven’t rehearsed with her in about a month, right?”

“Was it really a month?” I muttered, leaning back in my chair. Then I thought back. The days blended so much I didn’t even know what day it was let alone what happened about a month ago. “Huh, it has been a month.” Like I haven’t been counting. “Yeah, I start up rehearsals with her again today. Should be very interesting.”

“So you guys aren’t fighting anymore?” Joey asked, hope laced in his voice.

“I wouldn’t know, I haven’t talked to them,” I replied leaning back and folding my hands on my stomach.

“It’s not good to stay mad at someone,” Kelly spoke up.

“Who said anything about me being mad at them? I just never had a chance to talk to them. The only thing that we’ve been able to do was leave messages back and forth to each other. Anyway, did you find good dresses for tonight?” I smiled at how easily I changed the subject. Get the girls on the topic of shoes or clothes and the subject would never go back to the previous one. I leaned back and relaxed as I listened to them go over their excitement about tonight. I was excited too but it still hadn’t hit me yet. I guess it was still going to take me a while to grasp the fact that my life was about to change.

“Sorry to interrupt but I gotta head out, but I want to see J first. Which one of you guys is sharing with him this time?” I asked as I stood and stretched.

“I am,” JC replied.

I cocked an eyebrow. “You’re not staying with your girlfriend? Does she snore or something?”

“Yes,” Chris muttered, turning it into a cough when JC glared at him.

“It’s just how rooming arrangements went,” JC explained.

“Ok, then give me the key and I’ll be out of the way.”

“I have to get something from the room so I’ll just go with you.”

“Whatever.” I turned to Joey and Lance. “You two are helping me later. I still don’t have a dress for tonight.”

“You don’t!?” Danielle cried out. “You’re losing valuable time!”

“Don’t you know me? I also do things at the last minute. Approvals, calling people, homework…makes it easier for me,” I said with a wave of my hand. “Can I count on you guys to do my makeup?”

“Of course!” Kelly said before the other girls could even open their mouths. “You’ll look amazing.”

“I don’t doubt it. See you all later. You’re coming to the rehearsal, right?”

“Wouldn’t miss it, have fun,” Lance replied.

“I always do,” I said with a grin before walking with JC out of the restaurant and back to the elevator. “Ok, out with it Chasez,” I said as soon as the others were out of the earshot. “I’m perfectly capable of waking up Justin myself and that ‘I have to get something out of my room’ cover is getting old. You only  use it when you want to talk to me about something.”

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. I lifted my eyebrows. It was longer now and it wasn’t in the Cesar cut like before. He gelled it up so it sat like a black square on his head. It fit his facial features well. I didn’t realize it until that moment how much I actually missed him.

The movement of him dropping his hand made me blink and look back down at the floor. I mentally kicked myself, it wasn’t as if I was staring at him but now I was acting like a stupid little kid with a crush. I mean, yeah, even I have to admit that JC is good looking…I guess. But never in a million, trillion years would I ever consider going out with him, or any of the others for that matter.

He suddenly turned to me and blurted out, “What Fatima did didn’t bother you?”

I laughed. “Wow, you guys are still on that? You’re worse than girls. I’m fine, things are fine. It didn’t bother me a bit. Things are running smoothly now and that’s all that matters.”

“But at the cost of your pride?”  He questioned. “It didn’t embarrass you at all?”

“I don’t get embarrassed,” I replied, shrugging, and stepped into the elevator.

“Ever?”

“Never.” I laughed again. “I don’t understand embarrassment, really. I mean, it’s not the end of the world. No one can die of embarrassment. Really, it’s an unneeded emotion.”

“But it didn’t even bother you a little bit?” He pressed.

“The only part that bothered me was that she wouldn’t let us come to a resolution ourselves,” I replied, tapping my fingers to the beat of the elevator music. “She really didn’t have a right to interfere but at the same time I see where she was coming from. If we stayed mad at each other it’d show in our performances and she was trying to avoid that all together. She just should’ve gone a different way around it.”

JC was silent for a few seconds before he finally spoke again. “I just don’t understand why you always give into what other people want.”

I was about to ask him about it but the elevator doors open so I decided to let it go. He walked me to their room and unlocked the door. I was appalled at how messy Justin’s side of the room had gotten in the few short hours they were there. I almost didn’t know that the lump in the bed was him, I was about to mistake him for his clothes. I went over to the side of his bed and lifted the pillow off of his head, laughing at the look on his face as he slept. I then brought the pillow down hard on his head, jolting him awake.

“JC, what the fuck—?” He started, waking up almost instantly. “JC, you shrank,” he commented sleepily, looking at me. “And became more feminine than usual.”

“Hey,” JC said in a warning tone as he crouched over his bag. Justin gave him a cheeky smile.

“How’d you sleep?” I asked ruffling his curly hair.

“Fine up until you attacked me,” he replied, rubbing his eyes before pulling me into a hug and kissing my forehead. “How’ve you been, Babygirl?”

“I can’t complain. I’m doing what I love and having fun with it. I just wish the days were shorter.”

“You’re tellin’ me. So what’s your schedule like for today? Want to walk around Rodeo Drive or something?” He asked as he ran a hand through his hair. “Or we could go to the pier or the beach.”

“I can’t, my day’s jam packed until the premiere tonight,” I sighed.

“You can’t move anything?” He asked, begging me with his eyes. Ha, I wasn’t going to fall for it this time.

“No can do. You can come to my rehearsal though. And if you’re a good little boy I’ll let you be my date tonight,” I replied with a cheeky smile.

He pretended to think it over and I smacked him on the arm. “Of course I’ll come, dummy. You didn’t have to resort to abuse.”

“It’s the only thing that works sometimes. Rehearsals start at one so you can go sightseeing or whatever but you have to buy me something since I’m practically grounded,” I said as I held out my pinkie. “Deal?”

“Deal,” he replied, hooking pinkies with mine and shaking it. Then he grabbed the pillow and hit me with it, so hard that I fell over. “Payback’s a bitch,” he said with a gleeful laugh. Then he added, “And in this case it’s true.”

“You do know you just called yourself a bitch, right?” JC asked, standing and tucking something in his pocket. He laughed at the confused look that was etched onto Justin’s sleepy face. “It’s about time you turned him down for something,” he commented as I headed towards the door.

“Jace, this is the best day of my life. Don’t ruin it,” I said as politely as possible.

“Fine, sorry,” he sighed. “I’ll make sure J stays occupied. Have fun, break a leg, and all that.”

“You’ve been around Justin too long,” I commented as I opened the door. “You’re making it really hard for me to not forgive you.”

“Oh, so you’re not as blind as you look,” he responded, leaving the room after me.

“You know, your face is funnier than your sarcasm.”

~*~*~*~*~

I pulled open the door to the rehearsal space and was met with loud music to my ears. I could feel the beats moving through my body all ready and I couldn’t wait to hit the floor. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and retied the drawstring to the blue shorts I was wearing and laughed when I saw what was going on.

Some of my dancers were playing a game we called Dance Freeze. Basically it was where you danced to a song and when the song stopped you had to hold the pose. If you fell or tripped or moved basically then everyone had to do a stretch that the loser hated to do. For example, if Codie fell we would all have to do Six Inches, or if Bella fell we’d have to do wall sits.

“Really? You guys are playing Dance Freeze without me?” I demanded, pulling my hat down on my head.

“Mini, hey!” Lyric yelled over the music, coming up from the bridge that she was in.

“Aww! Lyr, you moved!” Gabe called from where he was tuning his guitar.

“It doesn’t count,” I said with a wave of my hand before crushing her in a hug. “How long have you guys been here?”

“About as long as you’ve had that cute accent,” Lyric replied. “Where’s it been hiding?” She kept going before I could even answer. “You should use it all of the time, it’s awesome. We haven’t been here long, just flew in a few hours ago. We went to take a look around first. We took a bunch of pictures you have to see. Fatima said she’d be here in about twenty minutes, she had to stop somewhere first. Are you excited for tonight?” She said all in a rush.

“Lyric, R and R!” Codie said with a laugh as she pushed her blond hair out of her eyes. She then walked over to us and lightly hip checked me. “So, when’re we going to have another dye session? My roots are beginning to show again.”

“There’s a good place out here we can go to I think, my aunt suggested it,” I replied. “We can go tomorrow morning. I’m dying to get my hair done again. Did you stretch and everything?” I asked, tossing my bag into the corner and tugging at the black tank top I was wearing.

“That’s what we were doing,” Sevvie explained. “But Liam had said he wanted you to approve four pictures. One of them will be the cover for your CD so he wanted us to get that out of the way first.”

“Ok, let’s do that then stretch a bit more and then do whatever Fatima wants when she gets here.” They agreed and went to the get the pictures as we sat in a circle in the center of the place. We got Gabe to help out too because we wanted a male perspective on which pictures to choose. After fifteen minutes of debating we still hadn’t decided on one. Gabe and I liked the one that was considered an “outtake” where I was just sitting on the curb of a street with the hood of a hoodie up over my head and I was holding onto a CD player as I listened to it. The other one, the one that Codie, Lyric, and Sevvie liked, was of my leaning against a wall with a graffiti version of my name on the wall beside me, my hands shoved in my pockets. The art was cool but I like the simplicity of the first one.

We still didn’t decide which one to use when Fatima finally showed up. It felt weird, seeing her after a month, especially after what went down last month. I mean, we were on the same wavelength as usual but now the air just felt weird. I thought we had put the stupid incident behind us but I guess it wasn’t fully gone. I went through rehearsals of my rocks songs first because my voice was all ready warmed up and I wanted to do the choreography with her to show her some of the changes I had made. The guys had come in partway through the rehearsals and I started to mess up easy steps. Fatima could tell but she wasn’t saying anything and that only made me more frustrated.

“What’s going on, girl? You had this down last I saw you,” Fatima said during a break.

“I don’t know,” I replied pushing my bangs off of my forehead and letting out a breath. “Its nerves I guess.”

“You don’t get nervous.”

“Ah, I’m a better actor than I thought,” I said cracking a smile.

“Do you want me to ask them to leave?” Fatima asked, nodding her head in the guys’ direction.

“No, they’re fine. They’re not getting in my way and I promised J he could watch,” I replied, stretching my arms above my head. “I’ll be fine, just give me a few minutes and I’ll be ready to go.”

“Or is it something on your mind?” She asked, lifting her eyebrows. “Something that happened, I don’t know… a month ago?”

Don’t go off…don’t go off…don’t go off… “What is with you people? I’m over it. I’ve moved on. I’ve moved on so much that it doesn’t even compare to a tiny speck of dust!” I cried out, throwing my arms into the air. My voice echoed so much that they all turned to look at me. “What’re you looking at?” I snapped and grabbed my water bottle.

“It still bothers you,” she noted as I furiously tried to unscrew the cap of the bottle.

“No it doesn’t,” I replied, grunting. Finally I yanked it off but sloshed water on my tank top.

“Yes it does.” She took my arm and pulled me into the corner of the room. I could feel the concerned looks of the others’ on my back. “Talk to me, choreographer to choreographer,” she ordered.

I could feel everything that I’ve managed to lock inside seep out and up into my throat, onto my tongue… “You humiliated me,” I muttered, looking at the ground. “Things usually don’t get to me but that…that really got to me. It wasn’t that you made me apologize, that I could deal with, but it was how you made me apologize.”

“I’ll admit it was unconventional but it got the point across,” Fatima responded, gathering her long braids up into a ponytail in her hands and then dropping it over one shoulder.

“What point?” I tried to keep my anger under control but I was a ball of emotions right now that I couldn’t even pick which one to take the lead but anger was the first one out of the gate.

“The one that you knew all along,” she said, rolling her neck and stretching as she talked in a nonchalant way. “That if that ridiculous fight went on any longer it would show in not only your performance but theirs as well. That it would interfere with everything you both have been working on. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand why you’re angry and I should have taken care of it in a different way, or backed off altogether, but I work for both of you and I felt like if I could nip it in the bud then everything would just go away. I was wrong and I am sorry.”

“Those two elusive words have never been spoken to me before, so if you don’t mind announcing it to everyone,” I said with a grin.

She slapped my arm. “Girl, get back to work before I beat your ass!”

“You’ll probably do that anyway. Can I have, like, a ten minute break?” She nodded and I went over to the guys and sat down in front of them. “So, what d you think? And be brutally honest. I don’t want any of you lying to protect my feelings and crap.”

“You’re amazing, girl!” Dani (Chris’s Dani) said as she patted my knee. “You do a hell of a lot better than we could do.”

“What I like is that you’re not afraid of smiling,” Danielle (Lance’s Danielle) added. “You always see people with this serious look on their face but you’re smiling and having fun and it shows and I think that’s good.”

“Totally. It makes me want to just…get up and dance with you,” Kelly agreed. “And your songs are so catchy. I really like ‘Naturally’.”

“Yeah, that’s my favorite one,” Lance agreed.

“It’s mine too. That’s the only pop sounding song that I wrote that Max Martin would let me put on there. The others I trusted his feelings. I mean, who’d go against anything he said? Everything he’s touched has turned to gold…literally,” I commented, nudging Joey’s knee with my own.

“Why don’t you try to be a little more feminine?” Bobbie spoke up, using the hand that wasn’t clamped to JC’s like a lobster claw to spin some hair around her finger. “I mean, you’re jumping around the stage and kicking and punching and stuff. You are a girl; why not show that side of you?  I mean, if you’re capable of it.”

“Too easy to get taken advantage of and shoved this way and that,” I replied. “Might as well show people I have a brain in this head.”

“Too bad you don’t usually use it. It’s growing cobwebs,” Justin laughed.

I smiled sweetly. “Kinda like your dick, right?”

“Oooh,” the guys laughed as they punched Justin on the arm whose cheeks tinged red as the girl’s laughed as well.

“I’ll get you back for that, just you wait,” he promised, poking me in the side. “Can I make a suggestion?” He said randomly. I nodded. “You’re coming out of your pirouette too early because you’re turning your head too fast which makes you wobble. Try holding your head in the one position as long as you can and then complete with the rest of it.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed that too,” JC spoke up. “You’re taking your eyes away from the point too early. Hold your gaze there as long as possible and you’ll come out of the pirouette better.”

“Your ten minutes are up,” Fatima called.

“Sorry guys,” I apologized before rolling backward and landing on my knees to stand better.

“It’s ok. Your time’s valuable,” Lance said as he stood and pulled Danielle to her feet. “Aside from the premiere you have something to look forward to. Your valentine’s day gift will be in your room once you get back.”

“I was wondering if you guys were holding out on me,” I said as I walked back over to the group.

“Since when’d you become so materialistic?” Joey asked, cocking his eyebrow.

“I’m not, I’m just saying its two days after and I haven’t seen anything gift wrapped or nothin’.”

“Hey, we didn’t get anything from you yet,” Justin pointed out.

“It’s in my bag,” I said nodding towards it. “Take it if you want it so badly but don’t open it here. I want to see your reactions later so I won’t be distracted.”

“You’ll be distracted anyway looking at these hot faces,” Justin joked hugging me and kissing my forehead. “Have fun, see you later.”

“See ya.” I waved them away and turned back to Fatima who was talking to some of the band. “Ok, better get the rest of this rehearsal in before the stress and nerves settle in.”

“Ok boys, kick it off from the beginning!” Fatima ordered as the sirens came in from the speakers.

-------

“Ugggh. I finally get back to my room and now I have to leave again. Never in my life have I wanted to take a nap so badly,” I mumbled as I shuffled down the hall. Sevvie, Lyric, and Codie walked with me to my suite. I didn’t really see why I needed a suite to myself especially since it was so big and I’m tiny but they said it was my day so I just went along with it. (I mean, I didn’t want to seem greedy or anything).

“I know. Isn’t it funny how when you’re younger you want to stay up and when you’re older you just want to sleep?”  Lyric said, yanking off a chunk of twizzler and chewing it. Her lips were practically stained as red as her hair from the amount of candy she’s eaten.

“So now we’re just doing makeup and getting dressed and going?” Sevvie asked, stopping by my door and leaning against the wall.

“Yup and then it’s time to par-tay!” Codie cheered, dancing on the spot.

“Don’t wear yourself out,” I laughed, putting the key in the door and opening it.

“Like that’s possible. She runs on a hyper battery,” Lyric said, bits of twizzler falling out of her mouth. Just then Codie grabbed the last piece of twizzler out of her hand and was chewing it before we even knew what happened. Codie lived off candy and it showed. She could never sit still and her mouth ran like a fountain. She was crazy and funny so much that it was scary to see her when she was serious.

“C’mon! I want to show you my dress!” Sevvie said as she pushed me forward with her shoulder. Lyric and Codie then pressed into her until I literally had my face pushed into the door.

“Get off me, you freaks! I can see my face print in the door!” I tried to yell at them but I was laughing too hard. I finally managed to get the door open and stumbled forward as the other girls fell down in a heap. “Haha, that’s what you get—whoa!” I tripped over my unopened suitcase and fell hard to the ground  (of course). The others burst out laughing and rolled around on the ground until Sevvie started hacking and then coughed up something red.

“What is this?” She asked. I sat up and saw her pinching the now moist object and holding it to her eyelevel. She then looked down. “Oh, hey Mini, look,” she said pointing. I got back to my feet and looked where she was pointing.

“Trail of rose petals, how predictable,” I muttered, getting to my feet. “Ok, let’s see how cliché these guys are,” I said as I walked straight back to one of the bedrooms.

“Don’t! It might be something bad,” Codie suddenly yelled. “It might be a monster.”

I looked at her incredulously. Monsters. Really? “Codie, there are no such thing as monsters.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“What about Lou Pearlman,” Lyric laughed, elbowing Sevvie. “He looks like a monster.”

“He’s big enough to be one too,” Sevvie added, holding her sides.

I would’ve laughed as well if that seemingly innocent comment didn’t freak me out. What if he was on the other side of that door? I couldn’t help but wonder. I let go of the knob and stared at the door. No, don’t freak yourself out. There’s no way he could get into my room. I shook my head, turned the knob, and opened the door, staring at the person who was sitting on my bed.

“Daddy!” I finally yelled rushing over to him and throwing my arms around his neck. “You’re here! You’re really here! I thought you couldn’t come!” I muttered into his chest, squeezing him tight. I didn’t want to let go. I pressed my nose into his shirt and inhaled his familiar scent as tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes. I didn’t know how much I missed him until now.

“There was no way I was going to miss my baby girl’s night,” he said with a laugh, hugging me back. I heard him sniff so I leaned back and looked at his face. He quickly brought a hand to his eyes and wiped them. I grinned. He always tried to be macho and manly around me.

“I’m so glad you’re here. You wouldn’t believe the day I’ve had,” I sighed. He laughed and brushed my tears off of my cheeks and I sat down next to him. Then it suddenly dawned on me. “I’m totally glad you’re here but…I thought you weren’t allowed to fly. You could get sick or get an infection or something. There are always sick people on the planes. You know they need to give out face masks as well as those air sick bags. It’d stop the flu from spreading and then people wouldn’t have to worry about their kids getting sick too.”

He looked at me as if I were crazy. “I think you’ve been around Char too long. You’re starting to go off on tangents.”

“No, that means I’ve been around JC too long,” I corrected him. “The guy literally takes ten minutes to get to the point of a story and even then the story isn’t interesting.” Dad laughed long and hard. I think it was his first laugh in a while, at least it was the first time he laughed in a while when I was around.  I couldn’t help but smile.

I missed hearing his laugh. He was either sleeping or hacking up a lung when I was home. He seemed healthier than before. His eyes were brighter and seemed to have put weight back on. “But still, you could’ve gotten a cold or something.”

 “Sweetie, I can’t get sicker than I all ready am,” he pointed out, taking my hands in his and gave them a squeeze. He then grinned and added, “I see that trip to Memphis really stuck with you this time.”

I pouted and crossed my arms over my chest. “No jokes. I lived in Memphis for my whole life. It’s inevitable for my accent to be this thick. Why do you think I stopped using it?”

He smiled and ruffled my hair. “I wish you hadn’t. It’s a part of you.”

“Well, I know that now.” I hugged him again. “I’m so glad you’re here,” I said again.

“I couldn’t have you go through this alone. But I made a deal with your mother. If I came then I’d have to get a nurse to watch me back at home.” He rolled his eyes.

I laughed. “You need a babysitter?”

“A nurse,” he corrected me. “You know me. I can’t stay still for too long and Charlotte wants to make sure I’m actually taken care of. And we can actually afford it with the money you’re pulling in.”

“I’m not some cash cow!” I protested.

He shrugged it off and rubbed my back. “I shouldn’t hold you up. You should be getting ready.”

“So should you. You change in here. The girls and I are going to change in the other room. Don’t do too much; I don’t want you to wear yourself out.”

“You’re truly your mother’s daughter, always worried about nothing. I’m fine.” He stood and kissed my forehead. “Don’t let me get in your way. I’ll be sure to let you know if I need help, which I won’t.”

“You’re so stubborn,” I sighed, leaving the room.

“You got that from me,” he called behind me before I closed the door.

“You guys knew,” I stated, grabbing my suitcase and dragging it into the other bedroom where Sevvie, Codie, and Lyric were doing each other’s makeup. “Didn’t you?”

“Of course. Do you know how hard it was to keep quiet?” Lyric asked, applying eye shadow to her upper lid.

“Apparently it wasn’t hard for you guys to drag me all around the city looking for ridiculous stuff,” I fake growled. I let out a breath of annoyance when I heard another knock on the door. I pulled open the door and quickly moved out of the way as Dani, Danielle, and Kelly trooped in as if they were on a mission. “You guys look great,” I said while closing the door. “What’s in the box?” I asked, noticing the box under Kelly’s arm.

“It was in front of your door,” she replied, shoving it into my arms.

I searched the box for a card or a note of some sort but nothing was there. Shrugging, I pulled off the ribbon and opened the lid. Dani, Danielle, and Kelly all gasped when they saw the dress that was inside. It was all black except for the section around the chest; it was white and had a design like a giant bow. In short, it was awesome. And that’s saying something ‘cause I usually don’t have an opinion on anything dressy and/or girly.

“Aww, you’re going to look so adorable,” Kelly gushed.

I flinched. “Don’t ever use that word to describe me, please,” I muttered. “I wonder who sent it.”

“It doesn’t matter! Get your butt in the room and get changed. The guys are waiting downstairs. Ben said he’s going to meet you down there so you guys can go together,” Danielle said, shoving me into the bedroom where Codie, Sevvie, and Lyric were quickly doing their hair. “Your mom and Mike said they’re going to be here in twenty and they’ll also wait in the lobby. We don’t have much time and we have a lot of work to do,” she finished, pushing me into a chair and putting her hands on my head.

“Are you insinuating something?” I asked, glaring at her through the mirror.

“Yup, you’re going to put up a hell of a fight and we don’t have time for it,” Dani said as she snapped an eyelash curler in my face. And as they started doing my makeup weight started to press down on my chest, my heart sped up, and adrenaline started pumping through my veins.

Oh, it’s going to be a long night.