Jessica had indeed left like she had threatened. Justin had gone fishing with his friends and Jessica had left. He didn’t call, he didn’t text, he was glad she was gone.

He hadn’t seen or talked to Payton since the night he’d kissed her when she had hit Jessica. He was giving her some space, thinking she needed it as much as he did. Who goes around kissing one of their friends after she hits your girlfriend?

Finally on Wednesday, he’d had enough. As he was watching TV with his mom, he picked up his cell phone and made a call.

”Waylon’s Garage, this is Waylon, what can I do for ya?”

“Waylon, its Justin.”

“Hey boy, what’s going on?”

“Nothing. What time does Payton get off?”

”She left about a half hour ago to go get Kody and take her to the doctor.”

”She going back there after?”

”Na, I told her to take the rest of the day off.”

”Perfect! Thanks Waylon.”

“No problem, talk to you later boy.”

Justin glanced down at his watch: 4:45. By time she got home, it’d be almost six. He quickly dialed another number.

“Georgiana’s Pizza Den, this is Donna, what can I get for you?”

Justin smiled. “Donna, its Justin.”

”Justin…?”

“Timberlake.”

The older lady on the other side of the phone laughed. “Oh! How are you hon?”

“I’m doing alright. Hey, I got a question. Does Payton ever order from there?”

“Sometimes she does. Why?”

“What does she usually get?”

”Medium supreme pizza and toasted ravioli for her and Kody. Why?”

“I need to order that. And a medium pepperoni.”

The older lady smiled. “Alright honey. You want to pick it up or have it delivered?”

“I’ll pick it up in about an hour.”

”Alright, we’ll see you then!”

Justin hung up and glanced over at his mom, noticing the huge smile spread across her face. “What?”

“Buying Payton dinner?”

“Yep. And gonna rent some movies for her and Kody.”

”Well, good. I’ve been worried about you guys.”

”What? Why?”

She shrugged. “Just have.”

Justin laughed before going upstairs to get ready.

Payton and Kody got home at 5:30. Kody had strep throat, but was still being bouncy.

Payton had just changed into her favorite sweatpants when there was a knock at the door. “Now what?” she grumbled and opened the door.

Justin was standing there with pizza boxes and a pile of DVDs.

”What are you doing?” she asked laughing.

“I bought you guys some dinner and rented a few movies.”

She stepped aside and Justin walked in. Kody saw him and ran across the room.

“No kissing! She’s got strep,” Payton told him as he picked Kody up.

“Uh oh! You sick squirt?”

Kody frowned and shook her head yes.

“I brought you guys some pizza and movies. How about we eat, then you can get your PJs on and we’ll watch a movie ok?”

“OK,” she whispered and yawned.

“What made you do this? Isn’t your girlfriend going to be pissed?”

Justin laughed. “She’s gone. Left when I went fishing with the guys.”

Payton nodded as she sat at the small kitchen table to eat.

As they were eating, Justin took in her small house. The furniture was old and worn in, and didn’t match. The walls had pictures Kody had made all over them, as well as photographs. There weren’t any of him and Kody up…yet. There were the framed pictures she’d had for awhile. Including the one of the two of them all dressed up at Payton’s senior prom. He’d made a special trip home just for that.

“Mama, I wanna go bed,” Kody moaned, rubbing her eyes.

Payton smiled. “Ok baby. Let’s get your medicine first; then you can get in bed.”

”Your bed?”

She smiled and kissed her daughters head. “Sure baby doll.”

She got Kody’s medicine and her pajamas on. Kody walked over and hugged Justin. “You put me in bed?”

He turned a shocked expression toward Payton. She smiled and nodded at him. “Ok squirt,” he told her and picked the little girl up.

As he was tucking Kody in, Payton cleaned up the pizza and grabbed her and Justin a beer.

He walked out five minutes later, all smiles. “She’s out.”

“Good. She drove me crazy at the doctor,” Payton sighed and sat on the couch.

Justin took his beer and sat down next to Payton. “Can we talk before the movie?”

“About what?” She had a bad feeling about this, and knew she should have said no instead.

“Kody.”

“What-“

“I’ve known you for forever Payton, and never pictured you doing the single mom thing. What-how’d it happen?”

“I slept with a guy, got pregnant, he left, and it’s just me and Kody.”

“Ok smartass. I’m serious. You were a virgin…until that night. Why would you sleep with random guys? I just- I can’t picture you doing something like that.”

“Justin,” she sighed, getting up and walked around.

”Who is he Payton? Do I know him?”

“Yeah,” was all she whispered back to him.

”Who?”

“He left town after we slept together.”

Justin let out an aggravated sigh. “Woman, other than me leaving, no one else has. I asked Waylon, Donna, my mom. No one. Which means he’s still in town. Stop lying and just tell me.”

Payton turned around, tears in her eyes. “He was the first guy I ever slept with, the guy I lost my virginity to! And he left the next day! He ignored my phone calls when I tried calling to tell him, eventually getting his number changed and never gave it to anyone!”

“What?” he choked out, beginning to put the pieces together.

“He was my best friend and I trusted him! I trusted him not to hurt me. Instead of hurting me, he just got me pregnant and left!”

Other than Payton’s sniffling, the room was silent.

Justin stood up, wiping his eyes. He walked over to Payton and grabbed her arms, hugging her tight. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

She took a deep breath and pulled out of his arms. “Its fine, we’re fine. Don’t…don’t feel bad.”

“I have a kid Payton! I got my best friend pregnant and left, never thinking anything of it! How is it fine?”

“We’ve done just fine,” she whispered.

He grabbed her arms, making her look at him. He had tears running down his face, his eyes red and swollen. “Listen, I’m not mad at you at all ok? I just- I need to let this all sing in ok? I’m going to leave and I’ll call you tomorrow ok?”

She just nodded. He quickly kissed her forehead, and walked out the door.

Why did she tell him? Now nothing was ever going to be the same.

She sat on the couch with her knees pulled to her chest. She picked up the phone and dialed her mom’s number.

“Hello?”

“Mama,” Payton sniffled.

“Payton? What’s wrong?”

“He knows,” she choked out to her mom, fresh tears starting all over.

“Calm down baby. Who knows?”

“Justin! He was asking me about Kody and it just all rolled out.”

“Oh honey. You knew you had to tell him at some point.”

“No I didn’t. Everyone would be better off if he didn’t know.”

”Does Kody know that he’s her daddy?”

“No! I’m not going to tell her either! Not until we talk about it.”

“Payton, you can’t expect him to drop everything because-“

“I don’t want him to drop anything!”

“Go to bed sweetie. I’ll be over in the morning to get Kody and we’ll talk then, ok?”

“Ok. Night mama.”

”Goodnight honey.”

Payton turned the TV and all the lights off. She walked in her bedroom and climbed in bed next to her daughter. When Kody felt her mom get in bed, she scooted over closer and curled up against Payton’s chest and stomach. Payton kissed her daughters head and draped an arm over her before falling asleep.

Justin left Payton’s and went straight to the gas station where he bought a 12-pack and a bottle of whiskey.

“Rough night?” the kid at the register asked.

“You have no idea,” Justin mumbled and walked out.

Instead of going straight home, he drove to the old abandoned farm between his mom and Payton’s mom’s houses. He sat on the hood of his car and cracked open a beer and opened the bottle of whiskey.

He took swig after swig of the whiskey, the careless feeling he wanted not coming. Instead, he just got madder and madder at himself.

“How the fuck could I have let this happen?” he screamed at himself.

He had a daughter. A very beautiful and smart daughter. With his best friend. She had given up her virginity to him because she trusted him. Instead of thinking, he was so caught up in the moment that he got to kiss and touch her, the idea of preventing it from happening hadn’t even crossed his mind.

He threw the half empty bottle of whiskey at a tree, the bottle breaking and pieces of glass and the whiskey going everywhere.

He didn’t know how he should react to the whole situation. Should he be happy he had a kid? Should he just disappear again and forget the whole thing or stick around and do the daddy thing? If he stuck around, he’d have to basically give up the career he loved so much. The career that forced him to leave again.

Then it hit him. His friend’s had been at his daughter’s birth. He didn’t even get to see her come into the world. They all filed in the empty space of the dad position because he wasn’t there. Should he hate them for that or be thankful?

That caused him to think even more. Did they know? They couldn’t. Payton wouldn’t say that they had slept together, there was no way. She wasn’t that kind of girl. Woman. He had to keep reminding himself that she was a woman now, no longer a little girl thanks to him.

“God I hate myself right now,” he moaned before getting back in his car.

He drove back to his mom’s house, thankful no one was there but his mom.

When she saw him walk in, she knew something was up. His face was tear-streaked, his eyes red and swollen, and he looked like he was about to cry again.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, instantly on her feet.

“Payton…Kody is mine,” he whispered, not even looking at her.

“Ohhhh,” she whispered, almost panicked. She wasn’t quite ready to deal with this. “Come sit down and let’s talk ok?” She ushered him into the living room on to the couch and she sat next to him.

He looked at his mom, tears starting to roll down his cheek. “I’m sorry mama,” he whispered.

“Sorry for what honey?”

“Getting her pregnant. Abandoning Payton and Kody. Everything,” he whispered. “I’m a horrible person.”

“Oh Justin, no you’re not! Payton and Kody have been just fine. We have all helped her out when she needed it.”

His head jerked up. “What?”

“When she needed help with anything, one of us was always right there. They were and still are both fine.”

He stood up. “You knew the whole time, didn’t you?”

She looked down. “Yes. I knew you two had slept together, and then when she ended up pregnant, I knew. When I asked her, she just confirmed it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he yelled.

“It wasn’t my place to tell you! I’m not the one that had the child, it wasn’t my place!”

“And what if she never told me? Keep it a secret forever? Because she sure as hell didn’t want to tell me!”

“Do you blame her Justin? She tried so many times to call and tell you! So did the boys! You never answered their calls, or called them back. I can’t say if I was in her situation I’d be wanting to tell you either! She’s probably terrified you’ll leave again!”

“They know too?”

“They knew before I did.”

“What the fuck! Everyone knew, but no one had the decency to tell me?”

“Would you have listened?”

”Yes! That girl was my best friend mom! I would have come running back here as soon as I could have!”

His mom cocked her head to the side. “She tried telling you Justin. You were too busy.”

He sank down on the couch, head in his hands and crying. “Her life is a mess because of me! I never met for any of it to happen.”

“I know it and so does she. It was her first time, she didn’t know what was going on to say anything. She loves that little girl and is thankful for her every day. You need to be happy you have such great friends that helped her with more than you’d ever know.”

He took a couple deep breaths, then looked at his mom. “Now what do I do?”

“You know she can make it without you. You need to decide if you want to be around and in the girl’s life or not. She told me she would never tell Kody until she was old enough to understand everything. It’s all up to you.”

“I don’t know how to do it mom. I love that little girl and did even before I knew she was mine. I don’t…I don’t want to miss her growing up.”

His mom smiled. “Then don’t. You are the only one that can make that happen. Payton can tell you whatever she wants to get you to stay or go, but you are the only one that can make it happen.”

“I…I don’t know. I don’t want to give up my career but I can’t miss this either.”

“You need to think about it, sleep on it. The answer will come to you soon enough. There are plenty of musicians out there that have kids and a family and they pull it off. You’re no different. You just have to make the right choice for you of which direction to take your life next and do it. No regrets, no turning back.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The right choice? What the hell was that? He obviously hadn’t made many right choices in his life.

“Justin,” his mom whispered.

“What?”

“Don’t be afraid of anything. No one is going to change their feelings for you, especially your friends. Don’t make a choice based on them; you base it on you and your daughter.”

“My daughter,” he whispered, then whispered it again.

“Go on up to bed and get some sleep. You need it.”

“I guess,” he mumbled, standing up.

“I love you honey and you’re my son. No matter what. Remember that.”

He walked up stairs and took a long hot shower, thinking things through. There was no way he could make a choice until he talked to Payton again in the morning. He had to find out what she was thinking and feeling. He loved the girl, and didn’t want to hurt her anymore than he already had.

“What do you want baby?” he mumbled as he fell into a restless slumber.