Chapter 40

September 2006

Memphis

Basket Case

Nicole looked up from her book when she heard the doorbell, Jinx-laid on the floor next to the couch, but quickly got up on all fours and barked in the direction of the front door. It rang again, and that time, Jinx trotted to the door. She let out a small sigh and she closed the book, and got up from the comfortable position she had been in for the past two and half hours.

She reached the front door and Jinx barked again, louder. Nicole looked down at him with a wrinkle of her nose. “I heard it Jinx, will you chill for a moment?” she asked, as if the dog was going to have a response. He barked again, with a wag of his tail, and tapped the bottom of the door with one of his paws. She smirked. “You are so impatient.” she pointed a finger down at him and said in a warning tone. “No jumping.” But Jinx, did not seem to hear her, instead he barked in the direction of the door. “I’m being serious.” She said in her firmest tone with her hand on the knob. She glanced up at the clock in the wall, and frowned. It was 2:30 in the afternoon-Susan was at a conference for the night, and everyone else she knew was at work or lived out of town. She looked back down at Jinx, and murmured out loud. “It better not be someone trying to sell me stuff. I’m not in the mood to be polite.”

She unlocked it and turned the knob, opened the door just enough to see who was standing on the other side. Her jaw dropped. “Justin!” she exclaimed in surprise and swung the door fully open. She had not been expecting him to be standing on her front door steps. Jinx barked louder when he recognized Justin.

Justin bent down and rubbed the back of Jinx ears. “Hey buddy.” he greeted with a large grin. “It’s good to see you too.” Jinx barks only grew louder, his tail wagging back and forth in excitement.

“W-what are you doing here?” Nicole stammered as she shut the front door.

He smirked and said in a teasing tone. “And here I thought you would be happy to see me.” He rubbed the top of Jinx head one more time before he stood up straight and faced her.

Nicole gave him a small frown, and walked back toward the living room. He followed in toe. “It’s not that. I just thought you were coming home next Wednesday.” She said. She was sure he had told her the Good Morning America concert was going to be next Friday and he wanted to be home a day or two before to make sure everything went on without a hitch. She sat back down in the spot she had been before he had shown up. He sat on the opposite couch from her. Jinx settling down next to him as well. “I thought you and Trace would be prepping for the album.” Justin’s second album was going to be release in a week, and he had been pretty busy lately with the promoting.

“I am, but we flew out to tape a piece for Good Morning America.” He explained.

“I thought you did that Labor Day weekend?”

Justin rubbed the back of shaven head. “We did, but they wanted to get a few more shots before it aired.”

She gave him a confused look. “Shouldn’t you be on Beale Street then?”

He cleared his throat and shook his head. “Nah, they wanted to get some shots of the General Store and some of the other places around here.” That’s all it took. She narrowed her eyes over at him in suspicion. Why did she have the sudden feeling that there was more to this visit than what he was saying? If it was anyone else but Justin, she would have told herself to stop overacting. But since it was Justin, she knew otherwise.

“So then why did you fly out?” she asked, a hint of annoyance bubbling in her stomach.

Justin shrugged. “We decided it would be good to come out and chill for a day or two before my schedule got crazy.” he concluded.

“We?”

He nodded. “Yeah, Trace is here.”

Now she knew there was more to this visit than what he was sharing. “When did you guys get in?”

He did not meet her eyes; instead he reached down to rub Jinx ears again. “This morning.” He glanced back up and gave her a small smile, ignoring the look she was giving him. “What time does Susan usually get home?” He asked, changing the subject.

Nicole wasn’t buying it. She knew him better than he thought. Something was going on and she had a feeling that her mother had something to do with this sudden visit from Justin and Trace. “Around 5:30. But she isn’t going to be home tonight.” she answered suspiciously. “Why is Trace here? Where’s Rachael?” she asked. About 3 months ago, Trace and Justin came to a decision that it would be better if Trace focused his full attention on the growing clothing line of “WilliamRast”. So Rachael had volunteered to take on the position of Justin’s new personal assistant.

“She’ll be here next week. This is officially Trace’s last week.” He explained, but a small pout formed on his lips as he said. “What do you mean Susan isn’t going to be home tonight?” A look of disappointment setting in his eyes. “I was really looking forward to her homemade biscuits and fried chicken…” he mused.

She ignored his fantasy of food. “She called you didn’t she?” she asked with a hint of annoyance in her voice.

“What are you talking about?”

“Susan.” Nicole stated. “And you knew she wasn’t going to be here tonight.” she accused. Nicole knew she had worried Susan three days ago when she showed up at the house unannounced. She obviously did not think all the way through the trip home. Because as soon as she stepped into the house, her mother started bombarding her with questions, and asking if everything was okay. Nicole had tried to play it off as best as possible, explaining she just had a few extra vacation days left from work and she just wanted to surprise her. But of course Susan had not bought her story. But at the same time, she did not push Nicole on the matter.

Truth be told, Nicole was still not sure what she planned to accomplished by flying out to Memphis. She just knew she had to get out of LA for a few days. She thought a change of scenery for a few days would make the sadness and uncertainty she had been feeling lately disappear. So far her plan was failing miserably.

“What do you mean who called me?” she heard Justin ask.

She broke out of her thoughts and narrowed her eyes over at him. She decided to try another approach and ignore his questions. “Does Cameron know you are here?”

Justin raised one eyebrow and answered simply. “Yes.” He opened his mouth as if to say something else, but something stopped him.

“Does she know I am here?”

He pressed his lips together for a moment and glared. “Why would it matter if you were here?”

Nicole only smirked. Wow, this must be a new record for the fastest they’ve started bickering.

“What?” he almost growled.

She got up from the couch to walk toward the large bay window that looked out into Susan’s backyard. “Don’t use that tone with me Justin Randall.” She looked over her shoulder at him, expecting a smartass remark. She had obviously hit a nerve asking about Cameron.Trace had mentioned a few weeks ago that they had gotten into a huge fight, but since Nicole hadn’t heard anything else about it, she assumed that it had blown over.But it was obvious by the tone of his voice; the fight was still going on. Yet, it didn’t excuse him from talking to Nicole that way.

“If you have something to say then just say it Nicole.” He stated, and ignored her last comment.

“You are the one that magically appeared in my front door Timberlake.” She reminded. Quickly getting back to the topic of why he was in Memphis. Because Justin didn’t just fly just to chill in Memphis before promotion.

“What the hell are you talking about? If I didn’t come and see you while I was down here, I would not hear the end of it. So don’t give me that-“

“I know you, and you would not have flown down here for just a day or two, especially when you are getting ready to start big promotion.” She interrupted. “C’mon J, we both know that’s not logical for you. I know she called you, if not you then Trace. Or maybe it was Lynn or Belinda.” Nicole paused for a second. “Oh fuck, she called all of you didn’t she? I told her to not say anything, because I knew this would happen. I knew she would send someone down here to get me to talk, when I really don’t feel like-“

Justin put his hands up in defeat. “Alright, alright, okay, yes. Just please stop thinking out loud.” Nicole frowned with a raised eyebrow in his direction. It was his turn to smirk. “What? Once you get started no one can stop you.” She didn’t answer, and sat back down. “And there was no tone.” he added under his breath. Nicole opened her mouth to say something, but decided it wasn’t worth it and pressed her lips together instead. He sighed. “Susan didn’t tell me to fly out here.” She watched as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “And she didn’t tell everyone. She mentioned it to Mom because she was worried…” he trailed off; he locked his gaze on her. “Mom called, asking if I knew what was going on. Trace happened to be there when I answered the phone.” he explained.

Nicole chewed her lower lip and broke from his gaze, not sure of what to say. Jinx must have sense her anxiety because he quickly jumped unto the couch and curdled up right next to her. She smiled down at him and rubbed the back of his ears. She knew she had worried Susan, and for that she wished she had stayed in California, that had not been her intention. But being in LA the past few weeks had made her feel as if she was suffocating. The idea of flying to Memphis had made the most logical sense a few days ago; the slow pace of her hometown had brought a sense of peacefulness she had not felt in weeks…even months.

"Nic-?" Justin started.

She blinked a few times and broke out of her thoughts. "Hmm?” and looked back up and he stared expectantly at her. “I’m sorry that you felt you had to fly out here, but you could have just called me.” she murmured, she was sure she sounded like an ungrateful bitch, but she couldn’t help but feel a bit annoyed at the whole situation. She wasn’t a damn child; she didn’t have to explain every move she made to Trace or him.

He snorted. “Right, because we both know how open you can be…especially over the phone.”

She glared and snapped. “I didn’t ask you to come out here.”

Justin bit back. "I've known you my whole damn life and acting like a bitch and pushing me away is not going to work. That’s your defense mechanism.” Nicole clinched her jaw. God, she hated when he was right. Now, all of a sudden she was cranky and she had been having a not so bad day, laying out and reading, hanging out with Jinx. “Nicole?” His tone was gentle that time. She felt a twinge in her heart when he said her name. Because she knew, he was just worried. She knew he just cared. And she knew he was right about her pushing him away. She licked her lips nervously, and looked back at him with pleading eyes as if saying-please don’t ask me anything else… at least not right now.

“Nicky?”

She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and answered. “Can we just drop it?” Because truth of the matter was she really did not have an answer.

~~~~~~~
Later that afternoon…

"Go get it!" Nicole yelled to Jinx as she threw the dog toy farther into the backyard.

Her back was to him; Trace shoved his hands into the pocket of his hoodie and watched her for a few moments, not wanting to disturb her bonding time with Jinx. She didn't get to see Jinx as often as she liked, and he knew that when she was in town she tried to spend as much time with him as she could. Nicole had it in her head that Jinx didn’t really know who she was, and this was her way of showing him that she loved him. He knew she felt guilty for keeping him in Memphis, instead of in LA with her. Trace snickered to himself as he thought about how serious she always sounded whenever the subject came up. He blinked out of his thoughts when he heard Jinx bark and make his way back to Nicole. He watched as Nicole bend down and affectingly rubbed the back of the dog’s ear. She leaned in closer and giggled when he licked her face. Trace smiled to himself as he watched them, happy to see his oldest friend smile. He didn’t know what was going on, but seeing her smile gave him hope that it wasn’t as bad as he originally thought.

She stood back up and threw the toy out back into the yard. Jinx wagged his tail and ran after it. She turned and looked over her shoulder, the smile still on her face, but it slowly faded when she finally spotted him. She didn’t say a word; instead she turned her attention out into the yard and to Jinx.

Trace rolled his eyes, and walked toward her. He wasn’t surprised at her reaction. Once he was standing next to her, he mocked. “Welcome home Trace. I’m so glad to see you.” He knew that would piss her off.

Nicole gave him a side glare, but did not say a word.

“Silent treatment,” He stated. “How old are you? Twelve?” he asked. He had to bait her, and he knew she would bite. She always did.

She let out a small sigh. “I know he asked-“

Trace stopped her before she could finish her sentence and half joked. “You know, contrary to popular belief, not all personal assistants are the bosses bitch.” She raised her eyebrow at him. He raised his own back at her and added seriously. “And we both know he didn’t ask me to come out here.”

“Well then maybe I should be thanking you for not tag teaming.” she said sarcastically.

He smiled sweetly at her. “I hope you were this sweet to J.” He stifled his laughter, when she gave him a look that said. “I’m-going-to-kill-you.” She walked away from him, toward the back porch of the house. She sat herself down on the back porch swing, and almost immediately Jinx trotted back from the yard and sat right now next to her. Trace couldn’t help but chuckle. “See, you have nothing to worry about.” And took a step closer and rubbed Jinx’s back. “He loves you.”

She glanced down at Jinx and smiled in spite of herself and murmured. “He’s a good puppy.”

Trace sat down on the other side of the swing and agreed. “He is.”

“I really do miss having him with me.” She mused out loud, as she looked down at Jinx with longing.

“Then why don’t you just take him back with you?”

Nicole looked up at Trace and shook her head. “I can’t do that to him. Here, he is able to run around freely. This is his home.” as she rubbed the back of his ears. “If I took him back to LA, I would not be able to give him the attention he deserves or needs.” she paused for a second. “Maybe once I finally get a place of my own, I’ll take him.”

“I’m sure that he would be okay with it, as long as he was with you.”

She bit her lower lip. “He has been extra clingy since I got here.”

“It’s probably because he can sense something is wrong.” Trace murmured, hoping he could approach the subject again. Nicole gave him a side look, with a light frown. “What?” he said defensively. “You’re the one that brought it up.”

Nicole sighed. “I knew the subject would come back around to the real reason you’re here.”

“And that reason is to make sure you are okay.” he answered back sincerely.

“Trace-“

He stopped her. “No Nicky, I’m not Justin.”Unlike Justin, his relationship with Nicole had always been brother-sister-like, which meant he didn’t baby her like Justin sometimes did. Trace liked to get straight to problem –at least with Nicole.Justin could be harsh at times, but he always soothed it over somehow. It didn’t make it wrong, it was just different. Trace knew he wasn’t always the most serious guy in the world, yes he liked to go out and have fun and party, and goof around, but when his family or close friends were in trouble or needed him, his attitude quickly changed. Because those people closest to him meant the world to him and that included Nicole.

He watched as she nervously rubbed her cheek with the back of her hand. She didn’t say anything for a few more moments.And as if Jinx could sense this was a conversation he didn’t want to be a part of, he took that opportunity to jump off the swing and go lay by the stairs.She licked her lips and looked up at him. Trace couldn’t help but notice the sadness that lay within her eyes. She finally broke the silence and said in a low whisper. “What do you want to hear?” she let out a small sigh and continued. “Do you want me to tell you that I have been to work maybe twice in the past month because I can’t seem to make myself leave the house?”

“Nicole-“

She shook her head slightly, and continued. “I can’t explain what is going on…or why I am feeling this way.” He watched her bring her hand up to her face to wipe away the tears that had begun to roll down her cheeks. She sniffed before she laughed dryly. “And I just keep having these crying fits…” she trailed off almost in frustruation. “Which I can’t seem to have control of.” she whispered. She brought her legs up, and rested one her cheeks to the top of her knees as she looked back up at him, tears in her eyes. “I don’t know what to do Trace.” she said honestly.

Trace felt a tug on his heart as he laid eyes on her. She looked so sad and fragile. He slid closer to her. “It’s going to be okay.” he promised. He didnt know how, but he would make sure that she would be okay, he reached out for her and wrapped one arm around her, pulling her into a hug. He didn’t have anything smart to say at the moment, so instead he let her cry in his arms.

After a while, he heard her sniff, and lift her head; Nicole looked up at him, her eyes red, and swollen and whispered. “Please don’t tell him.” She straighten up and wiped the tears away.

Trace knew who she meant, and tilted his head to the side in hesitation. “Nicky…” he started. She looked at him with pleading eyes. “He is going to want to know what’s being going on. You know that.”

“Trace, I don't even know what's going on. So how do I explain something I dont even know myself?" she murmured. “I just don’t want to worry him. He has a lot going on right now with the album about to be release and the promotion.” She paused for a moment and met Trace’s eyes. “And I don’t want to cause any problems for him and Cameron.”

Trace couldn’t help but snort at her last comment and thought to himself. “If you only knew how icy, things are between those two right now…” But that was a different story all together. Thankfully she didn't hear him, and Trace said instead. "You know, just because your friends have other things going on their lives it doesn't meant that they can't worry about you."

Nicole gave him a small frown. "I know."

"You don't have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders all the time. You do have people around you that are more than willing to be here for you, if you need it. You know that right? " he asked in a concern tone, but narrowed his eyes over at her.

"I know Trace." Nicole repeated.

"Then cut yourself some slack Nicole." he ordered. "Because you aren't alone here." Her frown turned into a light glare. Trace hid his smile. He knew she hated when he got all fatherly like on her. But she hated it because she knew he was right. He lifted himself up from the swing and put his hand out for her. "C'mon."he said, changing the subject.

Nicole looked down at his hand before asking. "Where are we going?"

"The real reason why I came over here," he explained. She gave him a confused look. "To drag you to dinner. Cmon." he repeated, and grabbed her hand. "Justin should be back with the pineapples by now."

Her eyes lit up at the realization of what Trace had just said, a light smile tugged at her lips. "Can crushed pineapples?" she asked cautiously.

He chuckled. "What do you think?" Glad to see a bit of light in her eyes.

"I think that means Granny is making her blueberry crunch cake." she answered as she took Trace's hand.