Chapter 24

Daydreamer

Germany 1997

“You little piece of shit!” Chris Kirkpatrick exclaimed. “You’ve been holding out on us!” pointing an accusing finger over at his friend/group mate.

Justin struggled to get up from the edge of the bed. “I told you- I had an extra bottle you idiot!” he reminded, snorting to himself as he fell right back on the bed. “You’re just too fucking drunk to remember me telling you that!” letting his head fall back against the mattress.

“He‘s not the only one that is fucking drunk.” Joey stated with a snicker. He sat on the floor, his back against the bed where Justin sat. Joey looked to his left, smiling at Nicole who sat next to him, her knees up to her chest. “Isn’t that right Nicky?” he asked, resting his head on her shoulder.

Nicole busted out with a few giggles. “Right Joey!”

“Dude!” Justin exclaimed, sitting back up and smacking Joey on the back of the head. Making Joey lift his head back up from Nicole’s shoulder.

“What the fuck was that for?!” Joey yelled, rubbing the back of his head with his hand. “Asshole.”

JC’s laughter bellowed through the room. He sat on the other twin bed. “That was: get the hell away from her smack!” he explained.

Justin glared over at JC. “Shut up.” he mumbled. Glancing back down at Joey and Nicole, a small frown on his face. He should have known this would happen. Joey was the biggest flirt he had ever met. From the moment Nicole and Rachael had landed in Germany earlier that day, Joey had been trying to get his mack on with both girls. First it had been Rachael. But Rachael had not fallen for any of it, mostly because she had become smitten with JC from the moment her eyes had landed on him. She had not been able to stop smiling and giggling like a damn 12 year old girl. It was actually kind of disgusting. But there was nothing Justin could do about it. Nicole on the other hand…

Justin knew Joey and knew it was just fun flirting on his part, and he didn’t want for Nicole to get the wrong idea about it. Not that Nicole was that kind of girl. And he knew she wasn’t looking for anything like that at the moment. She had just broken up with Josh. Justin knew she was on the rebound.

Shit, then again, maybe he should keep an eye on her…especially since she was drunk. He glanced down at her, and watched her gulp down another swig of her drink. He couldn’t help but smile. Yep, she was drunk. She had never had an alcoholic drink before until that night. It was actually pretty funny to watch. He watched her giggle uncontrollably, leaning a little more into Joey.

The small frown reappeared back on his handsome features, watching from where he sat. He brought the can of beer back up to his lips as narrowing his eyes. He couldn’t help but feel a twinge of something he didn’t quite recognize in the pit of his stomach as he stared.

Yeah, he was going to keep an eye on them. He didn’t want them doing something stupid. He was just looking out for his friends. At least that’s what he kept telling himself, as he tossed the empty beer can into the trash can a few feet away from him. He looked over his shoulder at Lance who sat up against the bed’s headboard. “Hey man, toss me another beer.” he asked him. Lance tossed him another can. “Thanks.” he answered, catching the beer with both his hands.

Nicole knew the type of guy Joey was. The kind of guy that talked to anything that had boobs and a vagina. Nicole knew that. At least he hoped Nicole knew that. Then he remembered she was only 15 years old. Damn. He let out a small sigh, he wasn’t going to lie to himself, it bothered him for some reason. Seeing her flirt back. Ever since the last time he flown back to Memphis to see his family, he had not been able to stop thinking about her. It wasn’t as if she didn’t cross his mind on a regular basis, but this time it was different. He found himself wondering what it would be like to kiss her soft lips, to run his fingers through her dark hair, to feel her pressed against him, to hold her hand…

He even found himself getting that goofy ass smile on his face- just like Rachael- whenever he thought about her.

He still didn’t know how his feelings for her had began to change, but they had. Gradually he found himself wondering what it would be like to have her as more than just a friend. But, he knew better than to act on his feelings, especially because at that time she had a boyfriend. And even now he knew better than to do anything about it. He didn’t want her to think he was trying to take advantage of her. Because he knew she was hurt. Josh had been her first boyfriend, puppy love- as his Granny would call it, Justin knew it would take some time for Nicole to realize that it wasn’t as bad as she thought.

And as much as he’d been fantasying about kissing her lately, he knew he needed to figure out exactly what these new feelings meant. He did not want to complicate their friendship. Fuck he wasn’t even drunk, he was over thinking everything, he opened his new can of beer. He needed more to drink. He had a buzz going but it seemed to be evaporating.

He thoughts were interrupted when Chris spoke up again. “Are you going to go get the bottle or not?”

Justin glanced back over at Chris, taking a sip of his beer. “You go get it.”

He heard Rachael giggled a few feet away. “He cant even get up from the damn floor.”

Yep, his cousin was drunk too. He glanced around the room. Actually, he was positive everyone in the room at that moment was drunk off their asses. JC and Rachael sat on the other twin bed, both with a cup of god knows what in their hands and flirting. Lance and himself sat on the other opposite bed, while Chris, along with Joey and Nicole sat on the floor. Justin snorted back his laughter when his eyes landed on Trace who was passed out on the couch a few feet away from Chris. They had been drinking and talking for the past couple of hours. It was the first night in about two weeks where him and the guys did not have a show and did not have to get up early the next morning, so they were talking advantage of it.

“Yeah. I cant even get up.” Chris agreed, the glassy look in his eyes.

Justin rolled his eyes and stood up. “I’ll fucking go with you because I know you’ll probably end up drinking in on the way back.” He placed his beer on the dresser. “Fucker.” he said jokingly.

“Wait, you want me to go… withs you?” Chris slurred. “Seriously, I don’t think I can get up right now.”

Justin reached out for the pillow next to Lance and threw it at Chris head. Chris just gave him the finger from where he sat as he ducked. “Fine, I’ll be right back.” he mumbled, shaking his head. He glanced back down to Nicole, and found himself frowning for what seemed the hundredth time in the past ten minutes, her head was resting on Joey’s shoulder. Before he realized it, he blurted out. “Nicky, want to go with me?.”

Nicole looked over at him, lifting her head up with a smile on her face. Oblivious to why he was asking her to go with him. “Go where?”

“To get my bottle of Jack.” he informed her. “C’mon, go with me.” reaching his hand out to her.

“Oookay.” she agreed. Slowly placing one hand on Joey’s shoulder to get herself up from the floor. Once she was halfway up, she took Justin’s hand, for support. She patted Joey’s head absently. “K, well be back.”

“Okay.” Joey answered nonchalantly.

Justin resisted the urge to shake his head. All of a sudden feeling stupid for thinking Joey was truly interested in Nicole. He was just being Joey. He blinked back to the present when Nicole stood in front of him.

“Whoa.” gripping tightly on Justin’s hand. “The room is spinning J.” she informed him with a giggle.

Justin chuckled. “Is it?”

Nicole placed her free hand on her hip, tilting her head and frowning. “Are you laughing at me Timberlake?”

“I’m not laughing at you.” Justin tugged on her hand, dragging her toward the door. “We’ll be back.” he stated out loud. He rolled his eyes. No one was listening. “C’mon girl.” he told Nicole as he stepped out of the room with her.

Once they were out in the hall, Nicole tugged on Justin’s hand. “Slow down. You are walking way too fast.”

Justin came to a halt, grinning from ear to ear, watching her. She let go of his hand, and leaned back against the hallways wall, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. A few moments, she opened her eyes back up and found Justin standing in front of her, the huge grin still on his face. “Just give me a few moments…”

“Do you feel like throwing up?” he asked worriedly, but the grin never leaving his face.

“No.” she said. “I just…you were just walking too fast that’s all.” she told him. “And will you stop smiling like an idiot.” she demanded.

Justin couldn’t help but chuckle. “I just never thought the day would come where I would see you drunk off your ass.” chuckling some more.

“I’ am not drunk.” Nicole said defensively.

He rolled his eyes. “Please girl, you’re drunk. You cant even walk straight right now.”

She pouted. “I can walk.” giving him a glare that lasted about five seconds before she busted out laughing. “Okay, so maybe I’ am a bit drunk.”

“Yeah, just a little bit.” he agreed sarcastically, shaking his head. “Ready?” extending his arm out to her. Nicole responded by sliding her arm through his, and gripping on to his hand, as she let him lead her again. Justin couldn’t help but feel a small shiver run down his spine as her fingers brushed along his arm. “You okay?” he asked her, trying his best to focus on anything else but her touch.

“Uh, uh.” she murmured. “You know my mom would kill me if she found out about this.”

Justin gave her a quick glance from the corner of his eye. “Then we’ll just have to make sure your mom never finds out.” he explained, continuing walking.

She rested her head on his shoulder as they walked. “Thanks.” she murmured. They walked in silence for a few moments. “Where is the room?” she asked in a whiny tone, at the same time they came to a stop,. They stood in front of a door.

Justin took the hotel room key out of his pocket. “So impatient.” he teased, unlocking the door, and letting her walk in first.

“I have to pee!” Nicole told him, letting go of his arm to find the bathroom.

Justin found himself laughing for what seemed the thousand time, as he shut the door behind him and followed her inside. He walked toward the luggage on the floor, next to JC’s and Joey’s luggage. He was sharing the room with the both of them. Usually the rooms where next to each other. But on rare occasions they were separated.

Nicole reappeared, smiling. “I feel better.” she informed him.

“Good.” Justin said, bending down to unzip his luggage, digging in to find his bottle of Jack Daniels. After a few moments, his hand came back out with his fingers wrapped around the bottle and the other hand holding two small shot glasses. “Hell ya. This is what we need.” looking over at her with a grin. He slipped the cap off the bottle and stood back up.

“Where the hell did you get that?” Nicole asked with a wrinkle of her nose.

Justin placed the shot glasses on the night stand by the bed. “From home.” he stated mischievously, carefully pouring the whiskey into the small glasses. “Just like your mom cant find out about you drinking-my mom cant find out about this. At least not about me having my own stash of Jack.” he explained, glancing back up at Nicole. His mom wasn’t keen about him drinking, especially when he was still under age, but at the same time, she never truly stopped him. It was harder to stop him now that they spent time in Europe. It had gotten to the point where Lynn just told him to be careful. He placed the bottle up to his lips, tipping his head back slightly to take a long swig of the whiskey. Closing his eyes as he felt the burning sensation of the alcohol down his throat.

With the glassy look still in her eyes, she said. “Your secret is safe with me.” she paused. “How can you take that straight?” nodding toward the bottle in his hand.

Justin placed the bottle back on the night stand. “Easy.” he said simply. He took one shot glass in each hand. “Come on Nicky, you’re about to take your first shot of whiskey.” grinning, as he handed the shot glass to her.

Nicole gave him a doubtful look. “I don’t know J. I don’t think I can do it.” glancing down at the shot in her hand. Yes, she was drunk, but for most of the night Rachael and Lance had been mixing her drinks. She hadn’t actually taken anything straight yet.

“Yes, you can.” Justin encouraged. “I’ll take it with you.” She bit her lower lip, looking up at him. He took a step closer to her, holding his small glass in his hand. “C’mon gurrl.” he drawled out.

Nicole felt something in her stomach jump when her eyes fell on his face. He had such beautiful blue eyes…

Where the hell did that come from?

She blinked back to reality, why not? It wasn’t as if she wasn’t drunk already. What would a shot of whiskey really do to her? She sighed. “Okay…”

Justin smiled widely. “That’s my girl.” he clinked their shot glasses together and said. “To…” trailing off for a split second. “To you, visiting.” he finished placing the shot glass to his lips.

Nicole couldn’t help but smile at his toast as she placed the glass to her lips as well. She watched him tilt his head back and take the shot down. Nicole closed her eyes, as she mimicked him and let the strong whiskey hit her throat. She opened her eyes, feeling the burn of the whiskey go through her. “Holy crap.” she stated, wrinkling her nose. “I cant believe I just did that.” meeting Justin’s gaze.

Justin looked surprisingly at her. “Well you did.” he pretended to wipe the corner of his eyes with his fingers. “I’m so proud of you. You took the shot like a real man.” Then took the empty shot glass out of her hand and placed it on the table.

Nicole slapped his chest playfully. “Shut up.”

“Want another one?” he asked her seriously, but his eyes dancing playfully.

Nicole looked wide eyed at him. “Uh, uh.” shaking her head at him. “But I do have to go pee again.” she told him with a giggle. “I’ll be right back.” turning her back to him and running to the bathroom.

Justin only shook his head, walking toward the hotel window. He opened the curtains slightly, looking out. Man, he still couldn’t believe he was in Germany. He was only 16 years old and he was on his way to doing what he had been dreaming about for years. Music. And doing with four guys he considered brothers. He knew that thing were not going exactly as all five of them had fantasized about in the beginning. For the past 4 months or so they had been all over Europe, performing wherever they were allowed. Staying in crappy hotels rooms, sleeping in airports and buses, but he felt it in his gut that it would be worth it in the long run.

He was brought back to reality when he heard Nicole’s voice. “Okay, I think I need to lay down for a little bit now.” she informed him.

Justin turned back around, as she crawled into the bed. He watched her slowly lay her head on the pillow. “I hope this is your bed.” she stated. “I don’t want Joey or JC to think I’m trying to steal theirs.” She shifted a few times, before she got herself comfortable.

“But its okay to steal mine?” he asked her teasingly, making his way toward her. He sat down on the bed across from her. He found himself thinking how pretty she looked right at that moment. Laying on his sheets, her cheek pressed against his pillow. The pillow that he carried to every hotel they stayed at.

“Yes.” Nicole answered without opening her eyes. “I’m your visitor not theirs.” He saw her wince slightly.

“What’s wrong?” He couldn’t stop starring at her.

“I just need to lay here for a few…” her eyes still shut. “I can feel it in my tummy.”

Justin found himself smiling at how cute it was that she said the word ‘tummy’. Only she would say something like that and he not find it silly. “Do you need to throw up?”

“No.” eyes still shut, placing a strand of hair behind her ear. “At least not right now.” she murmured.

“Did you throw up already?”

“No. Thank god.” she groaned.

He got up from the bed and walked over to the other end to grab the trash can and placed it next to the bed where she laid. “If you need to, the trash can is right here.” he informed her, sitting back down.

“Thanks.” she mumbled, licking her lips. “J?”

He blinked. He had been starring again. “Yeah?”

“Thanks for inviting us.” opening her eyes. “It really got my mind off the whole Josh thing.” she whispered. “Especially tonight. This is the first time all night that I’ve thought about him.” she told him honestly, her cheek still pressed to the pillow.

“Your welcome.” he answered back. “I’m glad you and Rach came.” he paused again. “I’ve missed you.”

She gave him a lazy smile before answering. “I’ve missed you too.” closing her eyelids again. “I think I’m done for the night.”

He let out a short chuckle. “Drinking?” he asked.

“Yep.”

“Nicky?” he called out after a few moments of silence.

“Hmm?”

“You’re better off without him.” Justin whispered. He had been meaning to say that to her from the moment she had told him Josh had cheated on her. “There’ll be plenty of other guys out there. Guys that will know you’re worth the wait…” That had been the other thing about Josh, he wanted Nicole to have sex with him even though she had told him many times, she was not ready. When Nicole had shared that information with Justin a few weeks ago, he had been ready to kick some Josh ass.

She opened her eyes again, looking warmly at him. “Thanks J…” trailing off. “But it still kind of sucks.” she said honestly.

“I know. But trust me, it will get better.” he swallowed the lump in his throat. “It always gets better.”

“Yeah…I know.” she sighed. “Can you do me a favor?” she asked.

“What?”

“Can you help me take off my shoes?” grinning sheepishly at him. “I cant seem to make myself get up.”

Justin rolled his eyes at her, but got up from the bed and made his way toward the end of the bed, untying her sneakers and slipping them off her feet, letting them drop to the floor. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” she whispered.

“You would be passing out with your shoes on.” Justin joked, sitting down next to her. “You sure you don’t need to throw up?” he asked worriedly.

“No.” she said. “But thanks for being here and taking off my shoes, and for what you said about Josh.”

“No problem, lightweight.” he teased.

“You should lay down…” she mumbled with her eyes shut. “Keep me company.” she said innocently.

“You’re not going to throw up on me are you?” he asked her jokingly, but felt his heart jump at her request.

“No.”

“You sure?” Already kicking his shoes off, and crawling next to her.

“Yes.”

He laid on his back, looking up at the ceiling. “Just warned me if you begin to feel queasy.”

“Okay.” she said under her breath. “I’m good right now.” Opening her eyelids again. “Is the room spinning for you too?”

Justin turned his head and faced her, a smirk on his face. “No.” trying his best to contain his laughter. “Just close your eyes, and try to relax.” he suggested.

She groaned. “Even with my eyes close, the room still spins.” she explained, but doing what he asked and closing her eyes again.

Justin shifted his body, facing Nicole. He let his head rest on the pillow, as he starred intently at her. Wanting so bad to kiss her soft lips and trail his fingers along the side of her cheek. He sighed softly, hesitantly moving his hand closer to her, his heart racing a million miles an hour. Where had all this come from? When did she become so beautiful? Had it always been there and he never caught on to it? Or had he been in denial with himself about how he truly felt about her? All these questions and millions more ran through his head at that moment.

He gently moved the loose strand of her behind her ear, letting his fingertips linger on her skin for a few seconds longer. “The room still spinning?” breaking the silence.

“Just a little.” She opened her eyes again, and Justin quickly moved his hand away from her cheek. She reached out and patted his cheek gently with her hand. “You’re such a good friend J.”

“I’ am?” Noticing how her hand still rested on his cheek, enjoying how she absently rubbed her knuckles along his jaw. He had to keep telling himself, she was drunk and didn’t realize what she was doing to him.

“Yes. I can always count on you to be here for me. Even when your so far away.” She gave him a warm smile. “I really don’t know what I would do without you. You’re the best friend anyone could ask for.” He watched her slowly lift her head up, leaning in to him, her thumb grazing his chin. She pressed her lips together, holding his gaze for a split second before brushing her lips against his cheek. Her lips lingering for a few moment, then moving away from him to fall back against the pillow.

Justin moved his head, his face hovering over hers. “When did you get so beautiful?” he blurted out, their mouths inches apart. He didn’t wait for a response as he tilted her chin up and leaned closer. He kissed her so softly. She moaned against his mouth gripping on to his shirt, and pulling him closer to her.

Daydreamer
With eyes that make you melt
He lends his coat for shelter
Plus he’s there for you
When he shouldn’t be
But he stays all the same
Waits for you
Then sees you through…