“SHIT!” Riley exclaimed as she lost her screwdriver for the 5th time that day.

A new desk had seemed like a productive use of her energy as she dove back into job searching. 

Actually, a new desk, some new shelves, and $200 of online shopping for new “interview clothes” had all been part of her master plan to “move on.” The actual “job search” part had been a little more slow-moving, though true to her nature, she had already applied to about 15 jobs. 

She refused to wallow, regardless of how the empty bottles of wine and pints of ice cream in her freezer might be giving her away.

She chalked the last year up to being in a weird headspace, and was ready to embrace the next chapter of her life, whatever that may be. She was actively pushing away the thoughts in her head that told her re-invention and new chapters had been a strong pattern in her life lately.

As she walked circles around the room and various bolts looking for her tool, Benji got up from a nap, revealing the missing screwdriver.

“Right...That makes sense, I guess.”

She sighed, picking it up and setting back to work. 

Her phone buzzed, lighting up with a text notification. She groaned as she looked.

Riley...Not much to say, I guess. Sorry. Can we talk?

Not very convincing. But perfectly timed. She was moving on. She was feeling stronger. She was bound and determined to be a “badass boss lady.” Or something like that. Katie had worded it better. The first week had been tears, too much takeout, and embarrassingly cheesy Netflix selections. 

It made entirely too much sense that he was reaching out NOW, now that she was ready to do something. It’s like he could sense it. 

Not a good idea. It is what it is. 

She stared at her phone for a second, her thoughts pulling her into the last time she spoke to him. The whole room had felt like it was caving in on her that day. She had been nervous enough without what he had said to her. Shaking off the memory, she set her phone down and moved back to her project.

A few minutes later, her phone buzzed again. 

I shouldn’t have said that. That’s not who you are.

Riley closed her eyes for a second before taking a deep breath and dialing.

“Marin…”

“Justin...Stop. Please.”

“I just-”

“No. You can’t do this. I need to move on.”

“We should talk…”

“About what?”

She heard him sigh through the phone “Riley it shouldn’t have ended like that.”

She was quiet before answering “You’re right..It shouldn’t have...But it did. “

She thought carefully. “I don’t regret any of it, ok? I just...It doesn’t work.”

“You don’t…” He stopped himself “I miss you.”

Riley choked back the lump in her throat “It doesn’t matter, Justin. I. I have to go..”

“Riley..”

“Justin...No.”

There was a pause. “Okay.”

Riley clicked the call off, collapsing onto her couch to let herself cry. 

**

Katie did a slow whistle as she looked around.

“Wow Ry...Wow…”

“Impressed?” Riley smiled.

“Uh..Yeah, you could say that…” Katie answered. 

It looked like a new apartment. Riley had rearranged furniture, hung new art, put up shelving, and had already stocked her newly assembled desk with office supplies. 

“I think I’m mostly done. It’s a whole new energy, right?” Riley beamed.

“In a way…” Katie knew what this was. She could read Riley like a book at this point. 

She hadn’t realized just how much she had fallen for Justin...or the job. Or both?

“Riley, what’s the plan here...Have you had any interviews, or…”

“A couple calls...I’ve applied to a lot, though…”

“What are you trying to do?”

“NOT a PA..” Riley shook her head.

“Well...That sounds...Yeah don’t do that again. But I mean, what do you WANT to do..”

Riley shrugged “Advertising again, I guess? Or events? Communications. Marketing…”

Katie stared at her best friend. She ALWAYS had a plan. This was weird.

“Do you know?”

Riley sighed “Katie..I’m tired, ok. Let me get some real interviews here and I will update you.”

Katie spotted a notebook on the desk. It was open. It had clearly been used.

“What’s that…?” she pointed at it.

Riley looked over at her desk. “My notebook? Just my schedule and application notes.”

“You schedule your job applications?”

Riley looked confused “Doesn’t everyone?”

Katie laughed “Yeah...No. What are the notes?”

“Company profile, notable work, potential mentors..Ya know normal stuff…”

Katie smirked “Normal…” Her face changed as an idea came to her.

“Riley..Could you do all that for ...someone else?”

Riley made a face at her “I’m not reliving the last year, Katie..”

“No no no...Not...Like that. You..Have a desk. Your notes have notes. You are the most organized person I know...AND you know your shit..”

“What’s your point…”

“Remember the cookie business?”

Riley laughed “Oh my God. Yes. You ate half of my inventory.”

“It was college...a lot of alcohol influenced my decisions back then…” 

“Okaayy...So what are you saying?”

Katie smiled “Riley...You could be your own boss…”

“What?”

Katie grabbed the notebook “Do this...for..artists, for events, for new companies...YOU KNOW WHAT? My cousin needs some help. He just finished his book.”

Riley gave her a weird look “Is it any good?”

Katie laughed “SEE...You immediately jumped to a relevant question. RILEY...Do what you do...on your own…”

Riley felt a smile creep across her face “You think?”

“Didn’t you say you got severance?”

“...More like a bonus, but...yeah…”

Katie gave her a knowing look. “Is it sitting in your savings account right now?”

Riley blushed “Yeah…”

Katie sat on the couch “Come on...Let’s talk business model…”

“Wait…” Riley moved quickly to her bedroom, returning a minute later with a worn notebook and tossing it at Katie “Like that?”

Katie’s eye widened “What’s this?”

Riley bit her lip “...An idea. From a long time ago…”

Katie shook her head and smiled “I knew it…”

***

Riley sat lost in her laptop, typing away at a proposal. She felt like she had no idea what she was doing, but her first “official” meeting with her first potential client had gone well. 

She was waiting on approval of her LLC license, but Katie’s cousin had seemed convinced Riley was the best person to help him promote his book. He was publishing independently, so he needed all the promotion she could muster.

She had poured through hours of research and templates to determine cost structure and had already identified potential event exposure and locations for small live readings.

Her birthday was in two days, and Katie, Emi, and her brothers had INSISTED they all go out that weekend, so she was racing against her own clock to get a plan together before then.

Her door buzzer interrupted her, and she got up to investigate. She wasn’t expecting anyone and hadn’t ordered anything.

“Um. Hello?” she called through the intercom.

“Miss Riley Marin?”

“Uh...Yes? Who is it?”

“Delivery for you, ma’am”

“Okaay…” she replied, confused as she buzzed the delivery man up. 

She cautiously opened the door to a friendly smile and a small arrangement of stargazers.

“Can you sign for these, ma’am..”

“Uh..yes..Thank you…”

“Have a great day.” The delivery man nodded before turning to leave.

“You too…” Riley replied as she took the flowers. 

“What the hell..?” she questioned as she set them on her small kitchen table.

Pulling out a card, she sighed as she read…

Happy Birthday, Marin. Part One. 

-Justin

Riley shook her head, throwing the card in the trash as she sniffed the flowers. They were beautiful...and her favorite.

Part one?! What did THAT mean?

Riley tried not to think about it, using the interruption to glance at the time. Before she could think it, Benji came prancing to her feet and jumped up onto her leg.

“Ok, buddy...I know. Walk time...Come on!”

Riley jogged along with Benji until he started to slow down. She was never quite prepared for when he had this much energy.

“Can’t you ever just walk,” she teased, slightly out of breath.”

As they entered the lobby to her building, she noticed a package by the mailbox area. It was in front of her mailbox. 

“Benji who sent us something?”

She searched for a return address and saw it. 

“You’ve GOT to be kidding me…” she complained.

Dragging the package upstairs with Benji leading, she grabbed a pair of scissors.

She was kind of annoyed. 

Opening the box, she found a handwritten card on top.

Part 2. 

Relax, Marin...I planned this awhile ago. Figured I may as well send it. 

Just some stuff that reminded me of you. 

Happy Birthday…

Riley lifted a sheet of tissue paper, finding the first item. A taco shaped stuffed animal complete with silly eyes and a smile. A tag fell from the side, and she grabbed it when she noticed writing

Houston, TX

WHAT?

She kept looking through the box and pulled out a box of chocolates with writing in a language she didn’t quite recognize. A post it had been taped on.

Hamburg, Germany

Houston. Germany. What?

She tried to think, but kept going. A T-shirt that had “Keep Portland Weird” screenprinted on it. Another post-it.

Portland. Sort of. I ordered it. 

Riley felt herself start to smile. Tour. All of this was from when he was on tour. 

There was one more thing in the box, and it was wrapped carefully. 

She opened it slowly and found a frame. It was a picture of her. Her hand was over her mouth slightly, and she was laughing. She recognized her outfit instantly.

Her last birthday. When *NSync had serenaded her. She looked completely embarrassed, but completely giddy. There was a blush in her cheeks. Who took this? When did they take this?

There was a post-it on the back of the frame. 

“The Real Riley…”

She felt the tears form in her eyes, wiping them away with the back of her hand. 

“Gawd damn it…” she whispered.