I stepped off the plane. My palms sweaty as I clutched over the bag that was hanging from my shoulder. JC’s letter with all his information neatly folded in the front pocket. I walked slowly trying to calm my nerves when one of the girls in our group grabbed me by the arm and hurried me down the aisle thing connecting the plane to the terminal. We were a group of 8 18-year-olds who had been loud the whole plane ride so we were getting dirty looks from all the other passengers, I was happy to get quickly out of there.
As I stood waiting in the customs line I remembered the phone call I had gotten a few days after I had sent JC the letter. I had just come home from my last class of the day, when the phone rang.
“Hola?”
“I will never get tired of that phone greeting,” my heart sank. It didn’t matter how many times we talked on the phone.
“Babe,” I said in disbelief.
“Pretty girl, you have no idea how happy you’ve made me,” he said with a sweet tone. As it turned out *Nsync had actually just agreed to do a show for Disney in May and it was happening at the time I was planning to be there.
The customs agent waving at me brought me back from my memory and I approached the little booth he was sitting in.
“Business or pleasure?” he asked as I handed him my papers.
“Definitely pleasure,” slipped out of my lips as a stupid grin took over my face.
We arrived late at night and according to JC’s schedule they would be at rehearsal all night. The concert was two days away and a lot was riding on it. I got settled in my room at the hotel, I was bunking with Ana, a friend from college. We were staying at a small motel not far from downtown Orlando. We decided to settle in for the night after a quick dinner because we had a big day tomorrow.
I had talked to JC on the phone early in the morning. We were going to Sea World and would be visiting MGM the day of the concert. The guys had gotten us all tickets and everyone was excited.
I stood in front of the mirror nervously tugging at my jean skirt. I decided to wear a crochet knitted white halter top along with it and white sneakers. My shoulder length dark hair in my usual half ponytail. Ana looked at me and laughed. “You look gorgeous, quit it!” she said as she zipped up her bag and threw it on her shoulder.
“Do I? I feel like fucking dying I’m so nervous,” I said and kept tugging at my clothes and my hair.
“Listen, he’s a guy, you’re wearing a short skirt, you’ll be fine. I’ll be bunking with Gaby and Andrea next door just in case you guys need somewhere to be alone,” she said as she checked her lip gloss on the mirror.
“Shut up,” I replied but secretly thanked her. We hadn’t even discussed sleeping arrangements. I didn’t want to seem pushy or needy.
The ride to the amusement park was kind of long. It was hot out and I didn’t really engage with the rest of the group in the van because I was just too anxious about seeing JC. It had been almost 18 months since we had seen each other. So when we got into the park and neared the information kiosk, which we had agreed to meet at, my heart was going a thousand miles per minute. I walked quickly and almost stopped completely when I saw him standing in the agreed upon spot.
Khaki cargo pants, white tank top under a short sleeved green checkered shirt buttoned up to mid-chest, sunglasses and a million dollar smile. His hair was back to being combed up and styled with gel instead of the short cut with small bangs he had been wearing in the last pictures he had sent me, he had filled up a little and didn’t look as skinny as the last time I had been with him. He was breathtaking to say the least. I had to summon all my strength not to immediately run to him.
We walked to each other, not really knowing what to do. I just couldn’t believe he was really mere centimeters from me. “Hi,” I said, clutching my bag strap which was hung across my chest, a little tighter.
He smiled even bigger. “Hi,” he said back. And then instantly we started towards each other and melted into a hug. His scent filling my nose brought back all the emotions I had safely stored in the back of my mind and never let myself revisit. He wrapped his strong arms around my waist and squeezed tight, burying his nose in my hair. His lips were close to my neck and I could’ve just spontaneously combust right there. The next thing I knew his mouth was claiming mine and embracing me in a delicious kiss which made my knees falter a little so I clung tighter to his neck.
When we finally parted I turned to look at my friends who were staring and laughing. I felt my face grow red as I grabbed JC by the hand and proceeded with introductions. He was gracious and charming and friendly and incredible with all my friends. Most of them had heard the single and seen the video and even the guys were a little star struck. I mean, to be in the presence of JC you felt a kind of way, he just had this aura about him that has always been indescriptible.
The day was spent riding all the rides, seeing all the shows, eating all the junk and it was a blast. I had worried in vain that things were going to be awkward and weird between us but they weren’t. Conversation flowed with ease, we could talk about things that had happened in the last year and a half because it really felt like we had been there. And on the other hand, we had been away for so long that every touch, every kiss felt new. Every stolen glance and flirty smile was exhilarating. I felt like I had felt the first night we met back in Germany. He was also very touchy, holding my hand, placing his hand on my waist, on my back, on my thighs. It felt as though he was claiming me as his, and it felt very nice.
Shortly after 5pm we parted ways with my group. They were going back to the motel to get ready to go out, JC and I were meeting his parents for dinner. I had almost died when he told me.
“Are you kidding me? I'm not ready to meet your parents!” I had said with a terrified look on my face.
“Oh come on, it’s like you know them already. We have talked so much about them. And they are dying to meet you.” They had come down to Orlando to be at the concert. Apparently part of the deal with Disney was to also record little interviews to get to know the guys better and that included their families.
“I am not dressed appropriately to meet a mother, your mother!” I said as he dragged me by the hand to the park’s exit.
“Kiki, you look beautiful. My mom won’t care!” I rolled my eyes at him as he opened the door to his jeep to let me in.
“I am going to kill you,” I pouted after he jumped in and started the engine. Laughing, he backed up the car and we were on our way.
On the drive to meet his parents he held my hand the whole time, rubbing little circles with his thumb on the back of my hand. He leaned in to kiss me at every red light, and I caught him looking at me from the corner of his eye more than once.
Dinner was lovely. We met his parents and siblings at JC’s favorite sushi restaurant. He was right about his family being wonderful. His parents were loving and caring. You could really tell they were very proud of what their son had already accomplished and they knew he was still destined for amazing things. They were both very protective as well. His mother, Karen, was nice and chatty, but her questions directed towards me were inquisitive and direct, never intrusive. She made it clear JC, or Josh as she called him, had talked a lot about me and she had insisted on meeting me, despite her son’s reluctance to ever let her meet one of his “friends”, he had agreed.
JC would squeeze my hand when he felt his mom being too fixated on me and tried to change the subject. I would smile sweetly at him and give him a reassuring look that it was ok, I actually found it quite endearing.
His father, Roy, was very quiet but very observative. He would lightly squeeze his wife’s shoulder whenever she would start asking JC too many questions, or bugging him about getting enough sleep, to eat more, etc.
Heather, his sister was the second oldest, she was fun and quirky but more on the quiet side. Tyler, the youngest, was loud and funny. The banter between him and JC was amazing. JC was so obviously protective of his young brother and Tyler was in awe of his big bro. There was a lot of teasing because I had never eaten sushi, let alone eaten sushi with chopsticks. JC tried to teach me and it led to him ending up with a couple of salmon chunks on his lap.
The whole time during dinner there had been physical contact between us. His hand on my leg, on my hand, his shoulder would bump into mine for time to time, his foot would rub against mine under the table and he would flirt candidly while my face would turn to fire and I had to bury my face in my napkin. It was a blast seeing him interact with his family, it was obvious he felt safe with them and I was honored to be allowed to witness it.
After dinner we said our goodbyes. Karen gave me a tight hug,
“It was nice putting a face to the many, many stories Josh has shared with me. You are a lovely young lady and it was very nice to meet you,” she said earnestly. It made me feel warm.
JC walked me to his jeep once more, hand in hand. Opened the door and before I jumped in he pulled me to him and planted a kiss on my lips. “That was amazing,” he said then let me get in the car, slapping me softly on the ass as I jumped on.
He drove slowly, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of the song playing on the radio. He came to a halt at a red light, turned to me with a devilish grin, “So I didn’t ask, but I’m assuming it’s cool if I crash with you tonight?” He said as his eyebrows shot up. I laughed. He had no idea how much I wanted him to take me back to my room. He had been staying at Lou’s for a while now and while his parents were visiting he decided to stay at the hotel with them just to spend more time with them. But tonight, he was all mine.
We got to the motel and he found a parking spot near the room I was sharing with Ana. He jumped out of the car and before I could collect my bag and was about to open the door he already had run around the car to my side and opened the door for me. He helped me down and as soon as my feet hit the ground my mouth was sealed by his lips. We tried to walk between kisses and laughs until we finally reached the door. I fumbled with the keys and got the door open, he rushed past me and pulled me in.
“I’m sorry for the m--,” I couldn’t get a sentence out because I was already being pinned to the wooden door by JC’s strong hands on my waist and his mouth impatiently attacking my own. His tongue caressing mine in a breathless kiss.
He stepped back and stared into my eyes for a couple of seconds and then gave me a half smile. “I’ve been waiting all day to do this,” he said as he swiftly undid the strings from my halter top in the back of my neck and it fell to rest on my waist exposing my strapless bra. He laughed like a little boy and resumed kissing me and drowning my laughter with his mouth as his hands traveled up and down my back and torso. The kiss became deep and passionate causing me to moan into his mouth. He stopped to take a breath and then continued his exploring of my jaw, my neck, my collarbone with wet kisses. he started down my chest and I could feel his tongue peek out in between kisses, he continued on his trail between my breasts, down to my belly button where my top laid lazily on my hip bones, he undid the button on my skirt as he kissed my abdomen.
“What are you doing?” I gasped out of breath trying to keep control, which was a losing battle.
“Shh, shh, shh” he whispered and blew hot air on my belly button which caused me to surrender all control of my senses to him as he slowly slid my skirt off of my body.
The assault to each other's bodies continued well into the night, until we fell asleep in each other’s arms.
The next morning I woke up with my head resting on JC’s chest, he was stroking my hair and humming while glancing idly at the ceiling. I kissed his chest, “Good morning” he mumbled as he kissed the top of my head. I made myself into a ball and scooted closer to his body. I laid my chin on his chest and looked up at him smiling.
“So,º that was different,” I said, biting my lower lip. He chuckled making my head bounce up and down. “Seems like you’ve had some practice,” I added. The chuckling stopped and now he was glaring at me. I held his stare as he sat up a little.
“And you haven’t?” he asked.
“Well,” I sat up a little, too. “I actually haven’t…” I looked down at my hands, “With anyone…” I looked up at him again, “Since...you.” My ears began to feel warm from embarrassment.
“Really?” a bewildered look on his face. “What about?” I shook my head. “And..?” I shook my head again. I had dated people during our time apart, as had he. But nothing really stuck.
“I mean, I’ve done things… but nothing like last night.” Now it was him who blushed slightly at my statement.
I slid closer to him until his hands were on me. I sat in between his legs and grabbed his face in my hands. “You know how when you’ve had really amazing Swiss chocolate and then any candy bar just won’t do?,” he threw his head back and laughed. “Well… it’s kind of like that.” He eyed me closely, as a huge grin crawled onto his face.
“So I am Swiss chocolate?” he asked as his hand rubbed my back up and down.
“You are top quality, pure swiss chocolate.” I said seductively as I slowly climbed onto his lap and closed the space between us pressing my lips gently to his.
After a little fooling around, getting ready and a big breakfast in the diner around the corner from the motel JC and I parted ways and agreed to see each other shortly before the concert. I went back to my group to start another day at a Park.
We spent another day of riding rides and seeing shows, sans JC but I still walked on air as my friends would often point out.
The park started filling up with excited fans. We proudly wore our VIP passes around our necks that allowed us into the backstage area and the area closest to the stage.
Tyler came looking for me and accompanied me backstage before the concert started. JC and the guys were playing hacky sack, which they had begun doing back in Europe before every show as a good luck ritual. My heart was pounding with excitement as the cheering that came from the people outside became louder and louder. I could only imagine how the guys were feeling. They finally managed to all hit the ball and cheered in unison. I hugged the rest of the guys quickly and wished them good luck and finally fell into JC’s arms. I held tight to his neck and squeezed him. He was exhilarated and could hardly stand still. “Good luck,” I said, pulling him in for another hug, he smiled wider, kissed me on the lips and off he was.
I returned to my group as close to the stage as we could get and settled for the best ride in the park.
The show was amazing. I had already been in awe of them back in Germany but their performance was even more polished now. Their energy and chemistry on stage had evolved into something fascinating. The choreography was cleaner, spotless. The vocals were flawless and the banter between the group and the audience was fun and light. I savored every second of the show and marveled at the energy in the crowd. We made fun of their outfits and danced along to every song. I sang my heart out with them, and was in awe of the energetic performance JC was putting on. Needless to say I was beyond turned on by watching him do what he did best.
After the concert the guys still had to do some interviews so we decided to meet up at a club later to party the night away.
The rest of the week was spent enjoying the parks and doing a lot of shopping during the day and spending the afternoon and nights with JC. It was the most fun I had ever had. After the concert their schedule had been rather quiet so we made the best out of the few days we had together. And the days really seemed to just fly by.
We stood wrapped around each other in the parking lot of the motel, waiting for the airport shuttle that would take me away from his embrace. His face buried in the nook of my neck. He inhaled deeply and I felt him smiling against my skin.
“What is it?” I asked, turning my head to face him.
“I guess I was right,” he said leaning back to look at me. “We did find each other again, pretty girl.” I smirked at him. “We just need to find a way to find each other more often.” I shook my head and rolled my eyes. He took my hands and wrapped them around his waist and then rubbed the back of my arms up and down.
“We do,” he said looking into my eyes intently. “I am not going another year and a half without you.” He bent in and grazed his lips against mine. My heart started racing as all the feelings that had resurfaced during the last couple of days started to bubble up in my chest. I wanted to say it, but somehow the words never found their way out of my mouth. I stood there silently with tears threatening to spill out of my eyes. I bit the inside of my mouth and smiled crookedly.
“We’ll have to work something out,” I managed to whisper before I felt my voice break. I buried my face in his chest and closed my hands in fists behind his back and squeezed him a little, choking back tears. He sighed deeply and rubbed his hand from my arm to my shoulder and cupped my cheek tilting my face up to his.
“We will,” he kissed me. “I promise. I am not spending another spring break away from you.”
“I’ve told you before, you don’t need to make me any promises,” I told him with muffled words against his shirt.
When the van came around we broke our embrace. He helped me with my bags and then as I was about to hop on the vehicle, he pulled me close to him and kissed me deeply one last time. I opened my eyes when he pulled back and without looking at him I jumped on the van.
He stood there, with sad eyes, hands in his pockets as the van slowly started its way to the airport.
With one hand on the glass I watched longingly as his figure became smaller and smaller and let a single tear slip down my cheek as I whispered, “I love you.”
