I bit the pen in my mouth nervously and tapped my foot on the floor. 

Ana looked at me and frowned. 

“What’s wrong?” she asked. We were sitting in the hospital cafeteria having lunch. There was a stack of papers in front of me and I was looking at it quite nervously. 

“Nothing,” I said in a low voice, pursing my lips together. 

“Yeah,” she said and took the stack of papers in her hands. 

“Ugh, I haven’t even started studying for this,” she told me and put them down. 

In front of me were the USMLE Step 2 forms that I needed to fill out in order to be eligible for taking the test. 

“What’d you get in Step 1,” she asked as she put a potato chip in her mouth. 

“243,” I said. 

Her eyebrows shot up. “Ok, very nice. Why are you freaking out about Step 2, then?” 

“I… kinda haven’t told my boyfriend I’m doing the USMLE.”

“Why not?” I raised both my shoulders. 

“I haven’t even told him I’m thinking about doing my Residency in the States.” 

Ana gave me a look and she was right. it wasn’t ok. We hadn’t talked about it. About me moving indefinitely to the USA to do my residency. Mostly because that meant having to make a very permanent decision as to where I was going to be for the next 4 to 6 years after graduating. 

“I just don’t think I wanna get matched here in Orlando and that’s a whole conversation I don’t know we’re ready to have.” I told her. 

“I get it,” she said sympathetically. “My ex and I broke up because he matched in Johns Hopkins. That was too good to pass up, and we didn’t really want to be long distance. But you’ve done long distance, and have made it this far. Would it really be a problem?” 

“I honestly don’t know. He’s kinda between jobs now, so I don’t even think he knows what’s gonna happen to him. But… I don’t know,” I said chewing on the inside of my cheek. “I kinda feel like this is a decision I should make for myself, you know?” 

“It kinda is,” Ana replied, taking her last chip, putting it into her mouth and making a ball with the now empty bag. “Orlando is not the best to be matched in, but it’s not the worst either.”

“Yeah, totally, I’ve loved it here.” 

“Ok, so what’s your dream match?” Ana asked. I shrugged. “Bullshit you don’t know, we all know which one we would really want. Tell you this, at the count of 3 we both say our dream match, ok? One, two, three,” Ana counted and without thinking I said: “San Francisco.” My eyes grew a little wide, as if I was only just realizing this. 

“Ha! I knew you knew. And that one, my friend, is an excellent choice.” 

----------

I laid my head on my hands. My elbows on the edge of the pool as the cool water helped with my aching muscles from being on call last night. An empty beer bottle sitting beside me, my boombox on the table beside the lounging chairs. 

I heard the front door open and close and footsteps walking into the house and up to the stairs. I smiled to myself and closed my eyes, waiting to hear him calling for me. 

“Kiki?” he called out. I lifted my head, squinting my eyes when the sun got into them. 

He stepped out following the sound of the music. 

“There you are, baby” he said smiling down at me. “I thought you’d be asleep.” 

“Yeah I came home with that plan but then I laid there alone and couldn’t fall asleep so I decided to do this instead.” I kicked my feet around in the water, splashing a little. 

“Sorry I wasn’t here, we pulled an all-nighter with Dallas. He’s leaving later today so it had to be done.” He kneeled down to me and pecked me on the lips. I fought the urge to pull him into the pool with me. I started to pull myself up to get out of the water.

“No, wait, don’t get out. I’m joining you, just… I want you to hear,” he took a cd case out of his duffel bag, stopped the cd I was listening to and put the one in his hand in. He turned to look at me shyly and smiled as he pressed play. 

A beat started coming out of the speakers. I smiled and looked at him, he was blushing slightly. Suddenly his voice blared through the speakers, I smiled wider. 

Before I could speak he started towards the kitchen, “Let me get you a refill,” he said as he walked away. 

I listened to the song. It was very good, he sounded amazing. JC came back with two open beer bottles, handed me one and took a big swig of his. His free hand clutching his duffel bag strap tightly as it sat across his chest. He was visibly nervous, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, looking at me with the cutest look on his face. 

I beamed up at him, and right there I realized, looking at his handsome face, that I would give up everything if he asked me to. I would stay in Orlando, I would move to Alaska if he wanted me to. But this realization hit me like a ton of bricks, because that wasn’t really what I wanted, and I knew he would never ask me to do such a thing, but the fact that I would be willing to do so made me feel a little uneasy. I must’ve made a face because he frowned. 

“You don’t like it?” he asked.

“No, no, it’s not that. I love it, it’s so good. I just wasn’t expecting you to be singing it.” I lied. Not completely though, because the last thing I’d heard was someone else was doing the song. 

“Yeah, I know and we entertained some options but at the end Dallas like my demo best, so…” he shrugged. 

“It’s amazing.” I told him, truthfully, pushing away any negative feelings I was having. 

“Yeah?” his face lit up. He put his duffel bag down and quickly pulled his t-shirt over his head as he kicked his sneakers off of his feet, he undid his jeans and pulled them down and did a little hop as he took one socks off and then the other. He was left there standing under the sun in just his boxer briefs. I had to catch a breath. He was a vision, and I had never felt more attracted to him than right there. My eyes travelled from his blue eyes to his mouth, down his muscular chest to his boxers. I bit my lip and then looked up at his face again. He was blushing and smiling. 

“Make me feel like a piece of meat, why don’t you?” he said laughing as he pulled down his underwear, his excitement very apparent now. 

I giggled as he ran towards the pool and jumped in making a huge splash. He emerged a mess of wet curls and 2-day scruff. He was gorgeous. 

He took me in his arms and kissed me deeply. His hands around my waist as my legs went around his and I pulled him closer by the neck. My lips parted as he explored my mouth with his tongue. 

I moaned into the kiss as his hands undid my bathing suit and the top floated away. His lips made its way to my chin, up my jawline, down my neck leaving a trail of wet kisses. He traced my collarbone with his tongue making my mind spin and then settled in between my breast. 

“Oh my God, you taste so good,” he said in a breathy whisper. My hands tangled up in his hair. 

Feeling like I could never get enough of him and wanting to be as close as humanly possible to his body, I kicked off the lower part of my bathing suit and guided him to me. 

The feel of our bodies finding a rhythm always made me go a little crazy. The thought of never wanting to be away from him came back to me and I just chose to get lost in the moment and enjoy the sensations he was eliciting in me. 

I pulled his head away to look deep into his eyes as he picked up the pace a little and in between huffs and puffs I told him I loved him and I felt more vulnerable than ever. The smile on his face as he said those words back made me lose all control as I moaned his name loudly and my nails dug into his back, feeling him tense up and pull me closer.