JC sat in the dim light of his home studio. He was listening to a series of incomplete tracks on a disk. Little snippets of music he was playing around with, hoping to mold into a song. His stroke of inspiration had been short-lived, and his manager was calling daily with updates about the disgruntled Sony execs. JC just wasn't working fast enough for them. He adjusted the headphones and clicked a link on the computer screen. He flipped a few switches on the soundboard. He closed his eyes and moved his head to the beat slightly. He silently mouthed out the notes, trying to convert sounds into words, but nothing would stick. He pulled the headphones from his head and tossed them down. Sighing deeply, he placed his head in his hands and began massaging his temples.
He sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity. He had been down in his studio for what felt like days, weeks! After another long sigh, he stood up and stretched. He reached into his back pocket to pull out his phone. He checked the time, 1:45am. He wasn't ready to go to bed, but nothing was happening here either. He sat back at the soundboard, placed his phone next to him and reached for the headphones to try again.
He rested his elbows on the edge of the soundboard and pressed the headphones closer to his ears with both hands, again bobbing his head to the beat. He liked the track, but the words just wouldn't come. Growing more and more frustrated, he was grateful for the distraction of his lit-up phone. A series of Instagram notifications began to populate his screen.
proofoflife1 just started a live video
proofoflife1 just started a live video
JC began following Nicole on her ridiculous Instagram account the day after he left her apartment. That was more than two weeks ago, and she had yet to post anything other than an awkward selfie of her and an older woman in front of a sign that read "Aeropuerto Internacional Benito Juárez," with a caption that read "Con La Jefita Vieja." She wasn't doing a particularly good job of providing proof of life.
He swiped up at the notification, and the Instagram app opened to a black screen. There was rustling noise and muffled laughter. JC watched, confused, for over a minute. No one else seemed to be viewing the video, and ultimately, he closed the app and put his phone back down on the edge of the sound board. It was too late, though. The spiral was turning: What was that about? Did she mean to start a live video? What was she doing? Was she okay? Why had no one heard from her? Had people heard from her? Why hadn't she reached out to him? Why would she reach out to him? Does she need help? Was she trying to ask for help without being obvious? Was she kidnapped? That happens in Mexico, right? Was he her only hope at survival? Jesus Christ Joshua, snap the fuck out of it!
He tried to laugh it off, but it was a fake laugh. He immediately reached for his phone and re-opened the Instagram app. He searched for her account and opened her feed. Four new posts greeted him. The first post was a captionless picture of Nicole and a middle-aged woman standing with masked Lucha Libre wrestlers. A second post contained Nicole sandwiched between the same woman and a younger man. He was lean with long black hair tied back in a messy bun. His scraggly facial hair couldn't hide his youthful appearance. They were seated in colorful boats docked on a shoreline of a canal. The caption read "Colores", and the location tag read "Xochimilco, Mexico." The third post was a candid shot of Nicole carrying backpacking gear, standing in the middle of a long rope bridge high up in a tree covered forest. The caption read, "The journey of 100 kilometers begins with the first step." The final post had 3 pictures, the first image was of Nicole and the same man from the colorful boat picture. He was standing on a rock as watered flowed from above him and down below him in a green pool of water. He had Nicole in his arms. The image was captured mid-swing as he tossed her from high up on the rock to the pool of water below. JC swiped. The second image was of Nicole and the man in the waist deep water below the waterfall. Nicole was balanced on his bare shoulders while his hands gripped her thighs. She was in a sports bra and her arms were spread out like wings. Her hair was braided into four thick rows of braids, and both Nicole and the young man were smiling at the camera. JC swiped again. The final image was of Nicole, the man, and a new young girl sitting in front of a tent at dusk. All three holding bottles of beer up and smiling into the camera. The caption of the post read: "100km Trek complete, and we picked up Molly along the way. Matlaihuitl said I needed a bath, so he threw me in."
JC scrolled through the feed of four posts again. Pressing and spreading his fingers out to make the images larger. The images spurred something deep inside of him. He wasn't sure if he was happy to see her, if he missed her, or if he was jealous that her half naked body was pressed up against another man. He scrolled a third time, and double tapped each post. Maybe liking the pictures would still the jealousy fluttering in his chest. He scrolled through the images one last time, then closed the app and locked his phone. He put the phone down and placed the headphones back over his ears. He clicked a link on the computer screen and piano chords began to hum in his ears.
Suddenly, startled by a pair of hands sliding over his shoulders and down his chest, he pulled the headphones from his ears and turned in his chair.
"Did I scare you?" Jen asked with a yawn and placed a small kiss on his neck.
"Y-Yeah!" he stammered, and then turned his chair sharply, and pulled his girlfriend into his lap. He lightly slapped her back side. "You should be punished!" he laughed.
"I'll take whatever attention I can get!" she laughed and poked out her bottom lip in an exaggerated pout.
JC tensed. The smile faded from his face. "I know, I know." he mumbled. His face grew hot, and the guilt began to rest like an anvil on his chest.
"Oh, babe, I'm sorry. I'm not nagging. I never get you home this much, and I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks. You're always down in this dungeon." She repositioned herself, straddling his lap, facing him, locking her fingers around the back of his neck. "You work so hard. I'm so proud of you." She kissed his lips.
He placed his hands on her hips and squeezed slightly. "I know. It's just..."
She interrupted him with another kiss. Deeper this time. "I just miss you too much." She kissed him again quickly and pulled away with a smile.
JC slid his hands from her hips and down behind her. "Well, we can't have that." He placed a small trail of kisses from her neck, up to her ear, and along her jaw line.
"No, we can't" she giggled and ran her fingers through his hair.
He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her deeply. She shifted on his lap seductively. He gripped her backside tightly and stood up from the chair. Jen wrapped her legs around his waist and gripped his shoulders as he carried her up the stairs and headed for their bedroom, leaving his phone vibrating on the ledge of the sound board.
****
Nicole lay silently in a cool, clean hotel room. As promised, Magdalena's friend's son, Matlaihuitl, escorted Nicole from Mexico City to Oaxaca. They had hit it off, and he agreed to hike the 100km Pueblos Mancomunados backpacking trip with her. They met Molly, another American, on their trek. Nicole and Molly were going to spend a few nights in Centro, at the hotel Matlaihuitl managed, before they ventured back to Mexico City together.
After a week of backpacking and camping, it was the first night she was able to sleep in a bed in a building that had electricity and running water. Nicole realized she hadn't updated her Instagram in almost two weeks, when she landed in Mexico. She was surprised Matt and Joel hadn't called, emailed, or sent out a search party. Before hitting the shower, she posted her evidence of life, and now that she was clean and lying down in the most comfortable bed, she was surprised she wasn't already asleep. Deciding to take advantage of the free Wi-Fi, she scrolled through emails. She was typing out a reply to a work email when her phone buzzed in her hands with four consecutive notifications:
Jcchasezofficial liked your post
Jcchasezofficial liked your post
Jcchasezofficial liked your post
Jcchasezofficial liked your post
Nicole blushed in spite of herself and tapped the notification. It was late, she thought. What is he doing up at almost two am? Freaking out about writer's block and being utterly dramatic, she was sure. She giggled almost aloud. She could hear the steady stream of water flowing as Molly showered. Nicole figured she had some time alone and decided she'd call him.
She scrolled through her list of phone contacts and tapped his name. The call connected. It rang once, twice...three...four...five times. "I'm sorry, but the person you called has a voice mailbox that has not been set up yet. Goodbye." More disappointed than she wanted to be, she powered her phone off and set it on the nightstand. She pulled the crisp, clean sheets up over her shoulders and closed her eyes, hoping to drift quickly off to sleep before the thoughts spiraled in.
