While stepping out of the van to stretch his legs Justin felt like he was hit with a ton of bricks. He was back in Memphis. He was home. A month ago he didn’t think the day would ever come but now he was standing in his best friend’s front yard in his home town, taking in the familiar scent that was Memphis, Tennessee as well as feeling the familiar beating sun.

And he loved it.

“Cuzzo!” Rachel exclaimed happily. Justin laughed at her nickname for him and her halfway in the yard for a big hug. Justin let out a breath and held her tight. It was as if, in that breath, all of his worries and his stress were let go and floated around in the atmosphere. “What took you so long?” She asked, slapping his arm as soon as he pulled away. “Our mothers are basically going nuts with excitement.”

Justin laughed and rubbed his arm. “We had to stop a couple of times because someone had to get the burrito extreme,” he replied, looking pointedly at Joey who had come up next to him.

“Hey, those ‘combo’ meals at Taco Bell don’t fill me up with only their three dinky little tacos,” Joey replied with a roll of his eyes. Then he grabbed Rachel in a large hug and lifted her off the ground. She laughed hysterically as he swung her to and fro, her legs twisting behind her.

Smiling, Justin walked over to Trace. “How’s it going man?” He asked, holding out his hand. Trace clasped hands with him before leaning forward and patting each other on the backs.

“It’s going good,” Trace replied with a nod of his head and shielding his eyes from the sun. “The moms are going crazy waiting for your return. I thanked God every day that I had a job to get to so I didn’t have to listen to them worship the ground you walk on all the time,” he said with a grin.

“Yeah, whatever man,” Justin said with a laugh, lightly shoving him on the arm. His smile was so big he was surprised bugs weren’t flying into his mouth. He was just so happy. He felt like he could float. Now he knew what people meant whenever they talked about Cloud 9. “Jonathan and Steven? Do they know I’m coming home today?” He asked, running a hand over his short hair.

Trace shook his head. “Everyone wanted to keep it a surprise. They should come over after school is finished.”

Justin nodded and spat on the ground. “Oh, I can’t wait to see them,” he sighed. “I just…I want to hug them again. I missed them so much.”

“And they missed you too, bro,” Trace replied. “Come on, we have lemonade and cookies for all of you.” He then turned to the van where the guys were pulling out their bags. “I can show you guys where to put that stuff,” he called out to them. He looked back at Justin. “Mom says they can either all stay at Lynn’s place or they can stay at mine.”

“Momma’ll want ‘em at mine. I swear she likes them more than she likes me,” Justin laughed as they began walking across the front yard. “Oof!” he cried out when Rachel took a running leap and landed on his back, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I didn’t miss that,” he grunted, hooking his arms under her legs. “Have you let yourself go since you got engaged?” He asked and then swore loudly when Rachel smacked him hard on the head. “Girl! What’s your problem?” He asked as soon as they crossed the threshold into the Ayala house.

“Now what did I tell you about that swearing?” Lynn asked in a scolding tone as she walked into the foyer. She let out a gleeful laugh as Justin let his cousin go and hugged his mother. He squeezed his eyes tight and took in her familiar scent of perfume.

This was what he missed. Being held in her arms and gently rocked, having her fingers run through his hair. Well, when he had hair. Knowing that in her hug everything would be okay and that’s what he really needed. To know that everything would be okay.

“How’re you feeling?” Lynn asked, holding his face in her hands.

“Hungry,” Justin replied with a smile. “Oh…” she lightly patted his cheek. “Go on, we have snacks in the kitchen. Dinner might be a little late,” she said before moving to hug JC who was the next one to come into the house.

He felt Trace lightly nudge his arm before following voices and laughter into the kitchen. He paused in the doorway and laughed at the sort of chaos that his eyes landed on. Egg shells lying on the counter, flower and batter on the countertop by a large bowl, juice, sodas, and cookies stacked up on the kitchen table, a plethora of boxes and wrappers on the floor as well as pots boiling on the stove.

Justin paused and took in the scene of the laughing women as they moved around the kitchen getting things cooked and ready for him and his friends. It reminded him of his childhood so much that he wished he could freeze-frame the scene and burn it into his memory for the rest of his life. He wasn’t so sure how he was going to leave in the next two weeks.

“Justin, it’s so good to see you again! Did you get taller? I swear, you don’t stop growing!” Cassidy said happily as she hugged him.

“No, I’m the same size Miss Cass,” Justin replied before turning to hug Charlotte and then his aunt Abigail. “Maybe you’re the one getting smaller,” he teased, placing a hand on top of her head.

“Oh don’t tease an old woman.”

Justin chuckled and then turned his attention to the one silent person in the room. He twisted his mouth to the side. The last time they talked they fought and she ran away. He was worried she’d do the same now, especially after what had happened. He hadn’t forgotten what they did that night and why he did it. He was just hoping they could maybe forget about it and move on and make things go back to normal, but he knew it would be hard. She held grudges, long grudges, and it was worse that he didn’t know exactly what he did to make her run so it would be harder for him to apologize which was what he knew she wanted.

He stepped behind her and cleared his throat. “Hey,” he said quietly. He was suddenly aware of how quiet it had become in the room. Taking a quick look over his shoulder her noticed that he was alone. In the kitchen. With her. With sharp objects everywhere.

That wasn’t their brightest idea in the world.

Mack turned and brushed her hair off her shoulder with her ear. “Hey,” she said with a half smile. Justin could tell instantly that it was forced. It didn’t reach her eyes like her normal smiles did. “I’d hug you but I have goop fingers,” she said with a little laugh, lifting her fingers from the bowl where she was squishing ground beef through her fingers. “How was the car ride?”

Her tone seemed light and normal but her words were short and clipped. Justin sighed. And she’s still mad at me, great. Maybe if I can make her laugh things will be fine. “It was fine. At least up until we stopped at Taco Bell for Joey. It was like we were stuck in a gas chamber the rest of the way here,” he said with a small smile on his face.

Mack let out what sounded like a laugh and a snort. “Same ol’ Joey,” she said, shaking her head. “See, that’s why you avoid places with spicy food or with raw onions whenever you’re going on a trip with him. You should try Subway next time. He still gets what he wants but then you can see what’s going in his food to minimize the gas attack.”

“See, this is why we needed you on tour,” Justin said, taking the plunge while sitting down on one of the stools that was next to the island in the middle of the kitchen. He kept his eyes focused on her back, waiting for her response. He hated this, hated not knowing what she was thinking and how she was going to react. They used to be called The Twins for a reason, he almost always knew what she was going to say before she would say it, she could practically feel what she was feeling but now it was like a void.

And all because he had slept with her.

Did he regret it? He didn’t know. He woke up the next morning at odds with himself for what he did and how far he let things go. They had been talking about their relationships and everything and the next thing he knew they were kissing and undressing each other.

“Everything fell to pieces…after you left,” he tried again, this time picking at his nails to avoid looking at her. “You even got JC to freak out. We were worried. Why didn’t you say anything to us?”

She scoffed. “Have you ever tried talking to a brick wall?” She asked.

“No,” Justin replied slowly as if she were crazy.

“You should. Then you’d know how I felt around you guys after a while. Like everything I said was falling on deaf ears.” She gave a little bitter laugh. “You know, it sucks going on tour with people who you call your friends and they don’t want anything to do with you, no matter how hard you try.” She shrugged. “I got tired of putting in the effort to get nothing in return.”

Justin opened and closed his mouth, struggling to find the right words, but he knew, ultimately, that wasn’t the entire reason that she left. There was something else that she wasn’t saying. He wanted to know but he wouldn’t push it. He got something out of it.

“I…I didn’t realize—“

“Of course you didn’t,” she said as she turned around to look at him and lifted her eyebrows. “You have your career and four others to worry about. My petty problems aren’t that important on your spectrum. It’s okay, I get it.”

“Obviously not because I hurt you.”

“You didn’t hurt me because of that. I’m miffed, pissed even, but I’m not hurt. I realize that you can’t pay attention to me all the time. It was the end of the tour, what did you need me for, really? I think about a year on the road dealing with me should settle into your brains by then.” She gave a teasing smile.

Justin relaxed. She was slowly starting to get back to her teasing self, which he could deal with. It was in that moment he realized just how much he missed her. He missed her waking him up every morning and then laugh at how disoriented he was in the mornings. He missed the way her nose wrinkled when she was confused or having trouble understanding something. He missed the way her lips pursed when she was annoyed with them all or because they did something stupid, which just so happened to occur at least five times in one day.

“Can I hug you now or…?” he asked slowly. He didn’t want to take the chance that she’d shove an egg down his pants or something.

“If you want to risk my goop fingers, sure,” she replied with a shrug.

He let out a little sigh and eagerly pulled her towards him, hugging her small frame tight as she held her arms out to make sure she didn’t get ground beef remains on his shirt. He gently rubbed her back while burying his face in her neck, taking in her vanilla and cinnamon scent. As soon as he pulled away—far enough so he could look at her—every shred of common sense he had flew out the window and he kissed her.

He knew it was a stupid thing to do. He knew it would somehow turn around and bite him in the ass, but goddammit he missed her like crazy. A shiver rolled down his spine as soon as his lips touched hers and all of his senses seemed to ignite. He didn’t remember that last time they kissed.

“Whoa,” she muttered as soon as he pulled away from her. “I, um, have to get this started,” she muttered, turning back to the ground beef. “I think, uh, I think everyone’s out on the porch.”

“Mack—“

“I have to get this started so dinner’s not late.”

The edge in her voice signaled the end of the conversation, it always did. “Okay,” Justin said quietly, and turned to leave the kitchen. On his way out he lightly touched his lips and let out a soft groan.

Rachel’s sides hurt from laughing so hard at the stories the guys were telling as soon as dinner winded down. Now they were walking around the neighborhood, to walk off what they had eaten so they could get back for the dessert: pecan pie, blueberry cobbler, peach cobbler, ice cream, cookies, cake, and all of the strawberries they could eat.

“I can’t believe you did that Chris,” Rachel sighed as soon as she calmed down.

“You should, it’s what Chris is known for,” Lance replied, lightly elbowing the oldest member.

“Where are we going again?” Joey spoke up.

“Nowhere in particular. We’re just walking around until we feel it’s safe to go back and eat,” Trace replied.

“We can stop by the barn. Cal’s shift should be over soon,” Rachel suggested. “He might let us ride a little. And Mack, you can show ‘em what you have planned for the competition.”

“What competition?” JC asked.

“You’ve decided to enter?” Trace questioned, lifting his eyebrows. It was the first time he’d addressed her since the others got home, Rachel couldn’t help but notice. He was a chatterbox with the others but he hadn’t said anything to her.

“I figured I might as well since I have nothing else to do,” Mack replied with a shrug and then she slowed her pace so she was walking next to JC and hooked their arms. “There’s a big horse show competition thing coming up in about a week that I want to enter. I know I’m a little rusty for not having ridden in a while but I think it’ll be fun. Now you guys can see me in my element.”

“And maybe we can get them on a horse,” Rachel agreed with a laugh. “And see how they do when they’re not on a stage in front of a lot of people.”

“I’m in. Sounds like fun,” Lance said with a smile.

“Me too. Can we get one that matches our personalities?” Joey asked.

“Does that mean Justin gets a donkey?” Chris joked.

“Shut up, man! I have my own horse,” Justin said, shoving him.

“What about you, C?” Mack asked, smiling at him.

JC always wondered what it was about her that got him to give into her ways. He would stand against her wishes for the first couple of minutes but he’d eventually give in, like always. A few times he’s caught himself wondering why he agreed, especially that one instance where she convinced him to ditch their security for a fun day in the city. Boy, did he get his ear talked off by Johnny for that one. Since then he’s vowed not to go along with any of her wacky plans.

But, of course, she was the one thing he’s come to find that he couldn’t resist.

JC wiped sweat from his brow for what seemed to be the millionth time since their plane touched down at the airport. Why did it seem like the sun was hotter in the South, even when it was going down? No one seemed to be affected by the heat at all, just him.

“How much longer?” Chris asked, trailing behind the walking group after a few more minutes of walking.

“Just a few more minutes,” Justin replied without turning around.

“Couldn’t we have just taken a car? We would’ve been there by now.”

And we would’ve been out of the heat, JC wanted to say but he kept his mouth shut. They were guests so it would be polite of them to go with the flow. But what could the car hurt? It had AC after all.

“It’s only five minutes away, you wusses. Man up,” Mack replied. She had a stern tone to her voice but a teasing look in her eyes. An expression that seemed to be permanently fused to her eyes. She always seemed to take life as a big joke. “I’m a bigger man than you guys are and I don’t have any man bits, thankfully.”

Chris stood up straighter and started walking faster at her words. Joey snickered and elbowed Lance while Mack smirked. She always seemed to have the best “motivational speeches” for them.

“Here we are!” Rachel said happily as a big red barn loomed into view. An old sign swayed in the light wind that skimmed the city. It creaked with every sway but it held on fast to the metal beam it was fastened to. Fletcher Family Farm, the sign read.

JC winced at the smell of straw and manure. He looked around to see if the others had noticed. Judging by the way Joey and Chris were both wrinkling their noses he wasn’t the only one who got a whiff of the sour smell. Of course Lance and the other two were used to it, being from the South.

It’s weird how split the group was. JC hadn’t noticed it before until now. Half of them were from the country and half of them were from the city. He never fully understood the term “culture shock” before now. They’ve only been there for two days and JC’s already felt the major differences. The city is usually filled with individuals, people looking out for themselves. But he’s seen on many occasions down in the South that everyone looks out for everyone, that family and togetherness rules above everything else.

He tried to take everything in and give it a chance but he felt too out of place. It didn’t help that, while there, Lance seemed to become Justin’s new go-to guy when that used to be JC. He wasn’t jealous, it just felt weird not to be the first one that Justin would turn to.

“Hey Cal,” Rachel called, waving at her fiancé. He tipped his black cowboy hat in greeting.

“I was wondering what was keepin’ ya,” he said while walking over to the group. “Justin, good to have you back,” he nodded at him and then they clasped hands. “Trace.” He clasped hands with him as well. “Little Miss,” he added to Mack who gave him a hug.

“Little Miss?” Joey repeated with a raised eyebrow.

“Long story,” she said with a wave of her hand. “Cal, these are our friends Joey, Chris, JC, and Lance.”

“Pleasure.

“We dropped by to show them around and see if we have time to ride a bit before we go back for dessert. You’re invited, of course,” Rachel said before kissing his cheek.

“Shouldn’t be a problem, Ray,” he replied. Then he addressed the group. “Are you guys ready to ride some horses?” Cal asked, turning his head to nod into the stables where the sounds of neighing met the air. He got random head nods and he led the group into the stables with a tilt of two of his fingers. “I can pick out horses for you based on experience. The horses are all sweethearts so you don’t have to worry about being bucked off or anything.”

“That idea makes me feel so much better,” Chris mumbled.

“Well, as long as you don’t pull on their hair you’re fine,” Mack said with a little pep in her step. “They’re like women; their hair is something you don’t mess with.” She turned her attention to Justin who called her name and the two disappeared around the corner of the stables.

“Where are they going?” Joey asked.

Trace looked in the direction they had just ran. “Oh, they’re probably going to see their horses,” he replied. Rachel’s eyebrows moved up a little at the tone in his voice before the two walked off to find their own horses.

“They own them?” JC asked, lifting his eyebrows.

Cal nodded. “For a few years now.” He stopped by a box where a pure white horse with blonde hair. She nudged Cal’s arm with her nose and tossed her head. “This is Honey,” he said while digging into his pocket. He found a star-shaped carrot and fed the horse. “She likes to take things a bit slower than the other horses so I think she’ll be perfect for JC.” Cal turned to JC. “You’ve ridden before? Even if you haven’t, Honey’s good with beginners.”

“I’ve ridden once or twice,” he replied, walking over to the box. Honey leaned towards his hand and he rubbed her velvety soft nose. She didn’t move an inch as she stared at him. JC could feel her stare all the way down to his toes, it was so piercing.

“Ahhh, I knew you’d get Honey,” Justin commented, walking over with a rich brown and white colored horse.

“Who’s this one?” JC asked.

“This is Lucky,” Justin replied, looking up at the horse. “He’s not really ‘mine’ but I ride him the most.” He turned when he heard the distinct sound of clip-clopping and watched as Rachel, Trace, and Mack came from around the corner on top of their horses.

“How’s it feel to finally see the top of my head?” JC joked at Mack who stuck her tongue out at him. “So what’s the plan?”

“We can ride the trails and then Mack can practice a bit and then we can go back. Sound good?” Rachel suggested. She got random replies. “Okay then, let’s go!”

“I don’t think I can sit down,” Joey groaned, rubbing his inner thighs.

“Just be glad you didn’t ride bareback,” Cal laughed, leaning against the circular fence. “At least you spent most of your time in the saddle.”

“As opposed to on the ground like Chris?” JC laughed. “Who knew the horse could drag you that far?”

“Ha ha,” Chris muttered, wiping dirt off of his face. “That horse was the devil, I’m telling you.”

“Nah, it just saw you coming,” Trace joked. Justin cracked up and gave him a high five. Things felt a bit odd when he first came back but now they were back in their groove. It always took a bit to get back on track whenever he returned home.

“How’s your grandfather doing?” Justin asked as Rachel rode by them.

“S’fine,” Trace replied with a shrug. “He could be better but he’s alive and that’s all I care about.”

Justin nodded. “So, uh, how have things been here?” He asked slowly.

Trace looked at him before moving his eyes back to the pen. “If you’re asking what I’m sure you’re asking she didn’t say anything about you.” Thankfully, he thought somewhat bitterly. “She just went straight to work as soon as she came back. Hasn’t been dancing either, she says she might stop. That she’s done all she wanted to do with it and wants to move on.”

Justin’s eyebrows crinkled. “That doesn’t sound like her.”

Trace shrugged. “How would you know? You haven’t been here,” he pointed out.

Justin opened his mouth to protest but he stopped. “Yeah…I guess you’re right,” he replied.

“They’re talking about you again,” Rachel commented as she adjusted the gloves that were snug around her hands. She looked in the boys’ direction as they leaned on the circular pen. She waved at Cal and blew him a kiss. He winked and touched the brim of his hat.

“You two make me sick,” Mack commented, adjusting her helmet while Bluebelle stomped at the ground.

“You’re avoiding the interesting subject at hand,” Rachel said with a grin, walking her horse –Tricky—over to her friend’s side. “Let’s say you’re an ice cream sundae—“

“Here we go,” Mack sighed.

Rachel ignored her. “You want something special on top. Do you want hot Trace sauce or Justin cream?” Mack lifted her eyebrows. “Hot fudge sauce, whipped cream,” she explained, lifting and lowering her hands as if she were weighing her options. “You can only have one topping. Which do you want?”

“Rach, I didn’t come back here to worry about that.”

“But you said Justin kissed you!”

“I came back here to get some time away and figure out what I want to do with my life. And, right now, I want to do this and get away from you,” Mack continued, firmly, and then urged Bluebelle forward.

Rachel settled in her saddle and chuckled. “She’s so stubborn, isn’t she Tricky?” She asked, rubbing her horse’s head. “This shall prove to be a very interesting two weeks.” She held her reigns tight and watched as Mack moved Bluebelle over to the start of the jumping course. Rachel tensed every time her friend took on a jump higher than the last one. She couldn’t help it, she always got nervous. She was never brave enough to take on jumping; dressage was her skill of choice. It was slower and was more about technique than jumping. “You were learning forward in the saddle too far,” Rachel told her.

Mack punched herself in the thigh. “That’s always been my biggest problem,” she sighed, gripping the reigns. She placed a hand to shield her eyes as she looked at the setting sun in the distance. “Okay, I’m going to go around once more then we can head back. I’m sure Chris wants to eat his arm by now.”

Rachel wrinkled her nose. “With all that hair?”

“When Chris gets hungry it doesn’t matter what’s in his way, he’ll eat it.”

Rachel sighed and watched her take on the series of jumps again. She winced at the metal clang and felt a scream rip from her throat at the thud of Mack hitting the ground hard. She dropped down from Tricky and ran over to her friend who had rolled onto her back and was breathing funny. “Are you okay? Did you hit your head?” Rachel asked breathlessly.

“No,” Mack replied, her face scrunched up in pain. “My knee! Oh, my knee!”

“What happened?” Trace asked breathlessly as he dropped to his knees by Mack’s side. Once Cal reached her he quickly assessed the situation and grasped her leg.

“Bluebelle didn’t clear the jump and Mack fell,” Rachel replied.

“Quick, take off her helmet,” Joey suggested, standing over them.

“No! Don’t do that, it could make a head injury worse,” JC advised.

“She hurt her knee, not her head.”

“You can’t be too sure.”

“Okay, does this hurt?” Cal asked as he slowly pushed on her leg to contract at the knee.

“Yes, yes, yes,” Mack cried out. “It hurts so bad.”

“Do you think it’s a sprain?” Justin asked.

Cal scratched his head. “Hard to say. Might be dislocated. Might be a break.”

“A break?” Mack repeated. “No! It can’t be broken! I have a competition! I have to dance!”

“What about walking?” Lance asked dryly.

“That too.”

“It’s just a guess, lil’ lady, I’m not a doctor,” Cal reminded her. “But we should get you to one. I’ll bring Bluebelle in. Otherwise you all can help her.”

“I’ll help,” Justin and Trace said in unison and then looked at each other. Rachel made a face. She could practically feel the testosterone bouncing around between them.

“Erm, I’ll help her,” JC said, breaking the awkward starting contest. He knelt and hooked his arms under her knees, as gently as he could, and underneath her shoulders, lifting her into his arms. “Some first day, huh?” He asked.

“Oh, shut up and take me to the hospital,” Mack grumbled.