Lance had come up for a few days, bringing the kids with him. It was evening and the kids were playing on the floor of the living room. Lance and Josh sat on the couch, watching them, while I decorated the Christmas tree.

Josh and I caught Lance up on the custody battle, and he told us what the twins were up to. It was actually a pretty nice vibe going. Lance seemed to have forgiven me for the time being, and I was just happy for the first time in a long time.

I excused myself to use the 'girl's room'. As I washed my hands, I looked at my reflection. There was a sudden, overwhelming pang of desire to hold a baby - a newborn baby. I pushed the feeling down and finished up.

I walked down the hallway and stopped at the end, looking at the scene before me. My eyes were drawn to Josh and the feeling came back, stronger than it had been moments ago. This was it. I was ready.

I raked my fingers through my hair and crossed the room. I squeezed my hips in the half a cushion between his hip and the arm of the couch and draped my legs across his lap so I was sitting just off his lap. My feet just reached Lance's thigh across the couch. Both guys were watching me by now as I leaned into Josh and licked the skin just below his ear.

"I'm ready," I whispered.

"For what?" he whispered back.

"A baby."

"What, now?" he asked a bit louder than he meant. I pulled back from his ear and we looked at each other.

"You?" I asked. We stared at each other for a moment more before he gave a small nod.

I gave him the brightest smile I had and slid off his lap.

"I'm a bit tired, please excuse me."

Lance nodded. "Night, Sam."

I gathered the tree decorations and put them together on the side table before kissing the twins and headed to the bedroom.

About fifteen minutes later, Josh joined me. I had changed into his favorite night gown and was sitting on the bed. He sat next to me.

"Honey, are you sure about this? It'll change everything."

"I'm ready. I love you, and I'm ready to do this. I'm willing to do this. That is, if you are."

"I am. Nothing could make me happier."

I leaned in and gave him a gentle kiss to start off our night.