I used to be so strong.

I used to stand so tall.

And then he came into my life and made me some version of happy for a short amount of time.  And when he swallowed and spit me out, I was torn into pieces. I was barely hanging on.

To love again, was a task that seemed impossible. In order to love someone, I had to trust again, I had to let my heart open enough to love. All of which I didn't think was an option.

Somewhere between the heartaches and the let downs, real, unconditional, unstoppable love, changed everything.

I sat for quite some time in silence with Justin on that dock. The man that sat next to me, changed my everything. He was the answers to any and all questions I could ever have about love.

Looking down at the sheet of paper that was empty moments ago, I realize that I had just let go of the anger, the pain, and the heartache. Word after word, melody after melody, the pain I had bottled up was filtered out between the lines on a single notebook sheet of paper.

"How is your heart?" Justin asked, placing his hand on my leg, rubbing back and forth, providing comfort.

"Surprisingly, better than I thought it would be doing." I lowered my head, shaking it with disbelief, "I trusted him with everything I had in me. He betrayed that trust." How can someone want to hurt someone so bad for their own benefits? I thought "He got the one thing he needed from me... he got this bubble of press around him that printed his name..."

A smirk forms on Justin's face. "Well, I'm going to burst his bubble. When you're ready, I'm going to release a statement." The evil little grin on his face made me smile. "I was never going to say anything but week after week the story's he is telling has gone too far. Placing the blame on you for his suicide attempt was too far."

"I want you to release a statement." I admitted. "I want you to clear your name." In that moment a light bulb had turned on. I looked down at the words in front of me. "I have an idea." I figured out a way to clear the air, in my way and leave it at that. I began to divulge the details to Justin, who immediately jumped on board.

"I like your ideas..." He beamed with excitement.

We sat along the docks of that Bay, holding hands like we were teenagers falling in love for the very first time.

I turned and leaned into his space, rested my forehead on his I whispered the words I wanted to say to him.  "Some say love isn't worth the things we went through to get where we are today. But I would go through everything again, all of it, because none of that is worth losing you." I kissed his temple, continuing to whisper to him. "I hope you know how much you've changed my life. It ain't easy, I know th-..." I didn't get to finish my big speech before his lips were on mine, his fingers twisted into the strands of my hair, his heart beating even faster than mine was.

"You might not think so, but loving you is the easiest thing I've done in my life." His lips pressed softly against mine, capturing the feeling of forever. "You're kinda stuck with me..."

"I think I can handle that."

*         

Several hours later in the dark, sold out arena...

I ran off the stage, changing from an enormous ball gown into those William Rast jeans that I have always used as my good luck charm, the very pair I was wearing the day I met Justin. I looked over at him standing next to the stage. He nodded his head, throwing a wink at me as I ran back out to the stage.

It was pitch black and the goosebumps had begun to fill every millimeter of my skin listening to the roar of the fans. In a normal life, the constant screams of people were annoying. To me, it was comfort, it was support at the greatest level.

The spotlight shined down at center stage. I had taken my place on a stool with the microphone stand pointing in my direction. I stared down at the criss-cross effect of the metal on the microphone. That simple piece of equipment projected the sound of my voice to everyone anxiously awaiting what I might say.

I glance up slowly at the sea of faces, the roar of the crowd made me feel at home. Being at home made me want to put things out on the table. I began to speak and the crowd listened intently. "I have been mum on an entire situation..." The crowd cheers again, they knew exactly what I was talking about. "Tonight and only tonight, we are going to change that." With the eruption of applause, I knew they were ready for me to say something as well.

"Relationships are hard." I paused as the applause increased, that was the truth. "And sometimes they are simply not worth the fight anymore. But I won't give him the satisfaction of thinking he was right." The crowd roared. They were on my side. "What I really meant to say, with every breathe I take, is I'm not the only one that made mistakes. If he is listening, and I hope he is, just think of all the mistakes you made... think of what you have done before you start casting stones... So to the guy who thinks he broke my heart. This is for you."

Like an old blues song, I started with just my vocals. The song had so much history that it needed nothing but the lyrics to draw you in. "You're cheatin' heart..." my voice reined. "Will make you weak. You cry and cry. And try to sleep... but sleep won't come, the whole night through." My voice climbed, echoing through the venue. "You're cheatin' heart will tell on you..."

The guitar starts to play a different tune, instead of covering the classic hit, my lyrics started to pour out. "No one ever said it was easy, I don't really like to complain, But if this wall represents your trust, I don't think I'm coming in today. Say what you want to the cameras, Tell them I've lost my mind, And if you're brave enough to claim your love, Lie to them as well. It's alright. I'll take the hit, 'cause I don't mind." My head sways back and forth with joy, singing each word. The light broadened and the crowd finally see's who is playing the guitar. A gasp is heard throughout the entire venue as the smile on Justin's face brightens his entire presence. I chuckled, as the crowd catches on to who it is and laughs with me. "If you get this message read between the lines."

A small guitar solo, leads me to tapping my foot off the side of the chair, taking me back to the moment right before I released my album. The moment in the chair at Ellen, trying to calm myself of what I was about to do, the moment I was focused on those damn short toe nails, the moment that changed my life.

Justin reached over and touched my leg, resting his enormous long fingers and warm palm on my jeans.

I'll never forget that first touch. It was the first of many times that he would do that and make me feel more important than anyone in the world.

Those moments changed the universe and it brought me to happiness.

I look over at Justin, scrunching my nose at him and smiling. He was my happiness.

I tapped my hand off the side of my leg, "If you're so damn clever tell me why I'm free and why, You're still in hiding, It's not about the money, or even about my time, It's just I can't stand for you to think you were right. No one likes a bitch, so read between the lines." The crowd laughed as I continued. "Everybody said you would do it, everybody said I'd cry. I don't mind the salty trail I left, But I'm sick of you always findin' it. So I'll take the hit, but just this time."

It may have taken me longer than I wanted it to and more heartbreak than it should have, but I was happy. Nothing Aaron could say or do could change my career or my heart, unless I let him. And that's never going to happen again.

"Shake their hands, play your part, little white lies never really hurt, everyone watches as it burns..." The crowd screamed, "If you get this message read between the lines, If you're so damn clever tell me why I'm free and why, You're still in hiding, It's not about the money, or even about my time. It's just I can't stand for you to think you were right."

I exhaled the drama-free air, "No one likes a bitch but I don't mind."

And just like that, I set myself free.