Light brown curls flew in all directions and a bright smile stretched across her lips, she was dancing. Ayelet watched her daughter twirling in her ballet class and felt her heart surge with pride. Lila was a natural, she must’ve gotten it from her father, but Ayelet wasn’t going to think about that. She now had a job in New York City and was making a modest living and lived in a decent two bedroom apartment and was able to send Lila to a nice little Jewish school on the Upper East Side.
Ayelet was surprisingly content with her simple life that consisted of working the hours that Lila was in school. She worked for a PR firm downtown; at least she got something from Justin that would help her raise her daughter, since she never asked him for child support. Her parents and friends thought she was crazy; he had so much money they all said. The risk was too great, all she needed was one person in New York to know about them and she would have the paparazzi outside her apartment again like they had been when she first came to the city. So far, nobody had noticed neither the shocking blue eyes on the tiny girl nor had they noticed the Timberlake pout but Ayelet lived daily in fear that maybe someone would piece it together.
She had been able to successfully avoid both Trace and Justin for 5 years. The one person she couldn’t avoid had been Lynn. Lynn had been determined to see her granddaughter no matter what, so she had hired a private detective to find them in New York once a photo of Ayelet pushing a stroller down 7th avenue had surfaced. Lynn had shown up herself the next day, telling Ayelet that if she wasn’t going to let Justin be around then she was at least going to let her. What was Ayelet going to say to that? So she agreed only if Lynn promised she wouldn’t tell Justin anything about them. Once Lynn finally agreed to this, it did take some pleading, they both agreed that Lynn would come and stay with them for a weekend every month. She, of course, had wanted to come almost every week, but there was no way Justin wouldn’t start questioning that.
The arrangement had lasted perfectly so far, Lynn mentioned Justin’s comings and goings in passing with every visit and Ayelet pretended she didn’t care just as often. She knew he was due in town soon, and Lynn was coming this way with him. He was looking at apartments in New York, it was enough to make Ayelet think about moving, but she rationalized he wouldn’t be living anywhere close to her with the amount of money he had to spend on a place. Thoughts of him had been in her mind a lot lately though, how could they not be when she watched her daughter dance her little feet off three times a week with the same grace he had on stage?
“Momma!” Lila screeched, running with arms outstretched in her tutu.
Ayelet knelt down and picked her beautiful wriggling daughter in her arms, spinning her around before setting her down and plating a kiss on her forehead.
“How are you my little ballerina?’’
“Mom, did you see me dancing, did you see? Huh?”
Ayelet nodded and hugged the little girl close to her body.
“I sure did baby; you were twirling better than any other girl in the class.”
The girl beamed up at her mother and took her hand as they left the dance studio. She had spent her whole life in New York and knew they went hand in hand anywhere they went. Lila loved the city and knew the subway map by heart, able to show her mother any route to get home. The people in the subway always found this amusing, if they slowed down long enough to notice. Often, when Lynn was visiting, Lila would plan out their trips for the day, she would always tell her mother it was because Nana Lynn got lost if she didn’t.
“Mom, sometimes the other girls in my class get picked up by a boy and not their mom. I am not supposed to talk to strangers, why do they get to talk to strangers?”
Ayelet sighed heavily and rubbed her face with her hands, she knew that eventually Lila would ask this, she just wasn’t really prepared with any answer. She couldn’t tell the child the truth that her father was a pop star who was living with who knows what celebrity this week but she also didn’t feel right about lying about him either.
“The girls get picked up by their fathers Lila.” She said, looking down at the little girl.
“But how come I don’t get picked up by my father?”
“Don’t you like it when I come get you, what about Nana Lynn?”
The girl wrinkled her forehead and you could tell she was working all the details out in her head.
“Yes, but where is my father? Is he hiding?” She giggled.
Ayelet ushered them onto the subway and they sat in the first seat available. There was a poster of Justin announcing his concert at Madison Square Garden soon and it seemed to catch Lila’s eye. Ayelet watched as she studied the picture and pulled out from her backpack a picture of herself and her mother and began to look between the two.
“Lila Grace, what are you doing? I told you not to leave my side when we are on the subway”
“Sorry Mom. I just think maybe he looks like me.” Lila pouted, moving back towards her mother.
“Who dear?”
“That man on the poster, the one who is going to sing.”
“You are suddenly really reaching to find that father of yours aren’t you?”
“I think maybe he’s it.” She nodded and took her picture up to the poster again.
Ayelet went sheet white and began to tremble. What would she do, her little girl would want to see him if she told her the truth and Ayelet wouldn’t even begin to know how to get in touch with him. He had probably changed his number half a dozen times since she’d seen him. But, she thought, she could call Trace. He was always bragging about how he had the same number since high school. She flipped through her phone and saw that his number was still programmed in there so she took a chance and hit send. The rings seemed to drag on before she heard a voice.
“This is Trace, who is this?”
“Trace…” She whispered, terrified.
“Yeah, listen if you are a fan, I’m not with Justin right now so I can’t help you.”
“No, Trace, its Ayelet.”
He didn’t answer for a long time and she thought maybe he forgot who she was and was trying to figure out who Ayelet was.
“What do you want?” His voice was different, harsher and filled with pain.
“Lila, she’s asking about her father.” She watched the child still holding the picture close to the poster and sighed.
“What does that have to do with me?”
“Help me T, I know I did a lot of wrong things but I can’t lie to her about him. And you should see her now; she is so big and beautiful.”
“Don’t talk to me about helping you. You took off and left me and him to worry at night about the two of you. I called you a million times and got nothing. I just recently took your number out of my phone and resolved to move on with my life. Then you decide you are going to just come bounding back in expecting things to be all happy, what you want me to call him and tell him you’re back?” He scoffed. “That will never happen; he and I want nothing to do with you.”
“Trace wait, don’t do it for me, do it for her. She wants to know her father.”
“And you shouldn’t have kept her from him for five years.”
“Look, I did what I had to do, I was all alone anyway.”
By this time, Lila had lost her fascination with the poster and was looking at her mother curiously. She crept closer to her and listened to the conversation, it sounded like her mom was fighting with someone, someone named Trace. She tried not to bring attention to the fact she was no longer with the poster and kept holding the picture up so her mom wouldn’t know she was listening.
“Trace, please just arrange a meeting for them when he comes here. That’s all I’m asking.”
“A meeting where Ayelet, at your apartment?”
“No, the garden, his hotel, wherever is best for him.”
“Fine, the Garden at 4 on Thursday.”
“Can’t, she has a dance class on Thursday and she is the best in her class.”
“Then she can miss a lesson.”
“Trace. . . “
“Ayelet, do you want her to see him or not, Thursday at 4 or nothing.”
“Call me with the details.”
“Yeah, see you Thursday Ayelet.”
“Goodbye Trace.” She hung up and looked over at her little girl.
“Alright Lila, you can quit pretending you weren’t listening and tell me what you heard.”
“Who am I going to meet on Thursday?”
Ayelet pointed over at the poster and nodded. “Him.”
“My father?” Lila whispered.
“Yeah, your father.”
Trace hung up the phone and sighed, hoping Justin wouldn’t notice the change in his behavior. He was 3 days away from being in New York City which was always fun, women and bars, not to mention the restaurant he and Justin had that was usually fun to visit, but this time he really wasn’t looking forward to it. He wasn’t looking forward to seeing her again and telling Justin they were going to see her. Nothing good would come from that conversation, he could feel that. He stretched out on the back of Justin’s bus and watched the road rush past him, trying to figure out any way possible to not tell Justin. He shook his head and dialed Ayelet again, hoping she’d answer and help him finalize a plan he had. Before she could answer, Justin walked to the back of the bus and sat down next to him, causing him to press END on the phone quickly.
“Hey Trace, I’ve been thinking.”
“Oh great, the one thing they shouldn’t let you do. What about man?”
“Just life, like maybe I’m done with this whole thing. I already lost enough for this life.”
“Lost what?” Trace mused, turning to face Justin.
“You know, like really big stuff. Lila, I guess that’s the biggest thing. I don’t even know my own daughter.”
“Lila.” Trace whispered.
“Yeah, I mean she’d be what, 5 now. I don’t know anything about her. Her mom hates me and won’t answer my calls. By the way, have you noticed how my mom gets all twitchy if I ever mention either of them?”
“Not especially, why would she? So, back to Lila, you want to see her? Are you saying you want me to find Ayelet?”
“Just pull her out of thin air, c’mon Trace. We will never find her.”
“Who knows, by the way, you have a meeting at 4 on Thursday.”
“Why? I have shit to do with the apartment I just got in New York. My mom and I are supposed to talk to some decorator guy or something, whatever.”
“Trust me J; this is one you want to take. You obviously don’t care much about that anyway, tell your mom you have a meeting and let her do that.”
Justin just shrugged and went back to the front of the bus. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad, Trace thought, but he couldn’t deny his intuition telling him otherwise. His phone buzzed in his hand and he turned it to see who was texting him.
U need smthng?
He could think of a lot of things he needed right then, but none from Ayelet. He guessed that she was just wondering why he called earlier, so he figured he better explain it to her.
Not telling J, surprise.
It seemed to take forever before she answered.
U know if he will b ok?”
Trace gave it a thought for a moment and finally decided that if he hadn’t talked to Justin earlier he wouldn’t be sure, but he knew now. Justin would be ok with seeing Lila, if not Ayelet.
Will b fine, call me Thurs.
There, it was done. He would see her also, and he had to have a few drinks before he knew how to handle that.
Story Tags: assistant justinandtrace justin pregnant
