As I enter the door of my hotel room, I am shaking uncontrollably, I feel my stomach turning again. I rush to the bathroom to empty my stomach of its contents. I am now completely drained. All I want to do is go to sleep and never wake up, I pull back the covers from the bed and climb in--fully dressed. I don't have the energy to change my clothes.
I curl up in a ball and lay there lifeless as my entire world crumbles around me. I never thought I would end up here; alone and broken. I close my eyes and pray that it's all a dream-praying that when I wake up he'll be laying here beside me. I open my eyes and I begin to cry because it's not a dream, it's really my life now.
When I wake up it's dark all around me; I cried myself to sleep. I'm a little startled by my surroundings, but I quickly remember where I am, and sadly why I'm here. As I lay there all I can hear is his voice--"I cheated" those words keep echoing in my mind over and over again. I feel like such a fool, how am I supposed to go home again after this? How am I supposed to explain this to my parents? My head hurts too bad to think about all of that right now. I just want to sleep, and so I close my eyes again and drift back off to sleep.
That is how my life has continued on for God knows how many days now. I guess you could say that I am depressed--surprise, surprise. Today I'm striving to actually take a shower, I have been contemplating it for a while now, but I just haven't found the strength to do it yet. I mean really who the hell thinks about showering when their entire world just fell apart. And then as soon as I think those thoughts, here come more water works. My eyes literally ache from all the crying I've been doing, but no matter how hard I try I just can't stop. As I curl up in a tighter ball I think to myself that that shower is going to have to wait yet another day.
As I wake up on whatever day this is I notice I feel somewhat better, better as in I don't want to kill myself better that is. I actually manage to walk to the bathroom insteas of my usual crawling method. I look at my reflection in the mirror; needless to say that I look like complete and total shit, what can I say? I'm a woman in mourning. My eyes are beyond bloodshot from my continuous flow of tears, my hair is a tangled mess and my clothes are wrinkled beyond belief, my lips are dry and cracked. I can't remember eating anything since I've been here. I slowly make my way back to my many suitcases and try to gather up the items I need for a shower. I honestly don't remember packing anything, but there is a ton of things stuffed into each bag. I slowly make my way back to the bathroom, I strip down and take one last look at myself in the mirror. I used to be somewhat of an attractive girl, you can't tell it by looking at me now though. I turn on the shower to the hottest setting and step inside.
The scolding hot water stings my skin, but that pain is minute in comparison to the pain I feel in my heart. I finally begin washing myself, this task is harder than I imagined it would be. I decide to wash my hair while I'm in here; despite how tired I am from standing this long, I rinse the shampoo out of my hair and suddenly a memory of a much happier time floods my mind....
~~~~~~ FLASHBACK: 2 YEARS EARLIER ~~~~~~
I'm singing obnoxiously in the shower washing my hair, all of a sudden I feel a pair of hands massaging my scalp. I slightly gasp at my early morning surprise.
"Good morning Baby" he whispers into my ear
Justin turns me around and I take in his perfect naked body; he has that crooked smile on his face and he's staring right into my eyes with those amazing blue orbs.
"Good morning" I say shyly still a little shy about being naked in front of him.
"Don't be shy Mere, it's just me" he says lightly and I slowly begin to relax.
"Close your eyes baby" I do as I'm told as he begins to rinse my hair; a smile creeps on my face and before I know it his lips are planted firmly on mine.
"I love you Amere Renee Timberlake"
~~~~~~ END OF FLASHBACK ~~~~~~
I don't know how or when, but I have managed to become curled up in a ball crying in the shower. I hear something in my room, stupid housekeeping do they not know what 'do not disturb' means? I don't care anymore, they can waste their time making the bed, I'm just gonna crawl right back in it when they leave. I somehow manage to get to my feet again and turn off the water. I don't bother to dry off I just put on a pair of sweats and an old shirt. My hair is still dripping wet, so I wring it out a bit before I open the bathroom door. I am completely prepared to chew out the housekeeper, I open the door about to give her a piece of my mind when I am rendered speechless by the person sitting on my bed----
"Lynn--"
Author's Chapter Notes:
Ok, so I got a snow day!! So I was able to play around with a few ideas! This chapter is not near as exciting as the previous 2, but its a lead in chapter. Thanks again for the reviews, keep them coming, good or bad! Alright, here goes nothing!
Chapter End Notes:
The chapter might be a two parter!!! I am playing around with the next chapter.
Story Tags: cheaterj marriedj
