"Oh my God, you guys! I cannot believe you're here!" Closing her eyes, Raleigh reveled in the feel of Carly's comforting embrace. After holding her for just a few moments, Carly pulled away and took Raleigh's hands in her own.

"Look at you! You cut off your hair!"

"I did! Look at you! You're growing yours out for the first time in what? Six years?"

"Something like that." Carly admitted with a laugh. Raleigh felt herself smile a real heart-felt smile for the first time in what felt like weeks, and it felt really good.

"Are you done hogging the girl or can we have some lovin' too?" Raleigh turned away from Carly and smiled at Justin as he held his arms out to her. Wasting no time, she ran to him, allowing him to wrap his arms around her. "We've missed you, Ray."

"I've missed you too, so much." Letting go of Justin, Raleigh turned to the last surprise guest.

"Hey Bobbie."

"Hey there little sis." Rolling her eyes, Raleigh retorted with the normal, "by five minutes," and jumped into his arms, unable to hide the smile that seemed so foreign to her lately. "how are you doing? Really?"

"So much better now that you guys are here." Raleigh forced herself to let go of her other half and turned back to everyone. "I'm so sorry. Everyone, this is my roommate, Autumn. Autumn this is Carly, Justin and my brother, Bobbie."

"The better half." Bobbie winked at her as he took her hand to shake it.

"We'll see about that. It's nice to meet you all finally."

"And you." Autumn hadn't missed the appreciative tone in his voice as he looked her up and down. Raleigh cleared her throat noisily before addressing her friends once again.

"So why are you all here? Bobbie, don't you have a final left to take?"

"Nope. Sure don't." The way he'd rushed out the words and refused to meet her gaze had Raleigh doubting the sincerity of his words.

"Robert, tell me you did not blow of a final exam to come here."

"Ray, you're my twin sister and therefore one half of me. I needed to make sure you were all right with my own eyes." Just as quickly as the seriousness had come into his voice, it was gone again. He smiled devilishly at her before putting his hands into his pockets. "Besides, you know as well as I do that anything Mom says is complete shit."

"Speaking of the ice queen, she know you left?"

"Well, given the five-minute lecturing voicemail she left me on my phone when she and Dad got home yesterday, I'd assume yes."

"They've been home for two days, Bobbie. Why did she wait to call and bitch until yesterday?"

"I made Janie, Alan, and Nick swear not to tell them. Wasn't so hard. They wanted to come but couldn't get off work and well, there just wasn't room for the ass squad." Raleigh just laughed and shook her head.

"So really, what are ya'll doing here?" Carly went to her and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Well, we came to save you from all this LA craziness and take you back home. And if you put up a fight we fully planned on kidnapping you." Carly let out a laugh before looking pointedly at the open baggage on Raleigh's bed. "But seeing the state your things are in, I'd assume its safe to say you wouldn't put up much resistance."

"Definitely not. Besides, a road trip with you guys sounds much better than a five hour flight home."

"Glad you see it our way." Bobbie said as he bounced onto Raleigh's bed, throwing her clothes to the floor from the movement.

"Bobbie!"

"What? Get packing. We leave in an hour. Hour and a half at the most."

Mouth gaping, Raleigh just stared at her brother as if he were an alien. "You guys just got here. You already want to head back out on the road?"

"Actually, we've been here for a few hours now. We saw the Hollywood sign, grabbed some breakfast in the heart of LA and went to the beach." Justin smiled at her like a child. She knew he'd always wanted to go to LA.

"Yeah, we were not leaving here until I could at least say I got to see the Pacific."

"Wow. In a few hours you've managed to do more than I have the entire time I've been here." Everyone figured that was more of a rhetorical statement rather than she expected a response so they remained silent.

Clearing her throat, Carly decided to break the silence. "Do you want help packing?"

Looking at her clothes that were sprawled all over the place, Raleigh nodded. "Sure. Can you unhook my laptop and put it in its bag? It's under the desk."

"Ok."

Justin and Bobbie offered to help her pack away her shoes and the other oddities she'd brought with her and within a half hour they were completely finished with the chore.

Looking around the room one final time to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything, Raleigh was surprised to feel herself fill with sadness. She had to remind herself that she'd wanted to leave. It's what was best, after all.

Before picking up her bags, Raleigh went over to Autumn and wrapped her arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you for everything, Autumn." Closing her eyes, Autumn willed away the tears.

"Ditto. Promise me you'll keep in touch?"

"Of course." Pulling away from the embrace, Raleigh looked at her newest, closest friend. "Maybe you can come visit me in Millington?"

"I would really like that."

Raleigh forced a smile and gave a half shrug. "Well I guess, goodbye."

Nodding her head, Autumn whispered, "Bye." and watched as they picked up Raleigh's things and headed out, ready for the long trip back home.

As Bobbie and Justin loaded Raleigh's bags into the back of Justin's Jeep Grand Cherokee, Raleigh turned and gave the dormitories one last look. This was her last day in LA, her last day as a student of Hollywood Academy of Music. She felt incredibly sad, but incredibly relieved as well.

Perhaps this really was best for her.
"Ray, you ready?" Looking back to Carly, Raleigh nodded her head before opening the back passenger door and getting in next to her best friend. "Are you going to be ok?"

Giving Carly a small smile, Raleigh just nodded her head. "I'm going to be fine." And she truly believed it.

Raleigh didn't know how long they'd been driving, was it an hour? Five? But she noticed that suddenly the sky was dark and the stars and moon were shining brightly in the sky, showing the forever long horizon. Suddenly she felt different. Whether it was the promise of tomorrow, or the beauty of the stars shining brightly in the velvet sky, she didn't know, but she felt as though she were ready to face another day. She felt as though she could get through another day without crying.

Maybe this was all she'd needed all along. Her friends, her family.

Maybe I'm going to make it, after all.

After driving for about another hour, Justin finally pulled into the parking lot of a gas station and they all got out, fully ready to stretch their legs and empty their overly full bladders. Carly let Raleigh go to the bathroom to relieve herself first so when she was done, she walked around the small gas station looking at the various kinds of food that could kill you within a few years and eventually gave up on finding anything she really wanted to snack on. When she came to the counter, he eyes landed on the many different kinds of cigarettes lining the wall and she sighed longingly. Looking around herself, she made sure she was alone before she asked for a pack of Marlboro Smooths. After proving to the cashier that she actually was of age, she paid for her guilty pleasure and hid them in her purse before heading back out to the car to wait for her friends.

She had only been standing there for a few minutes, bopping her head to an imaginary beat, when Justin and Carly caught her eye. She pushed herself away from the Jeep and couldn't help but to laugh at her best friend's words.

"Seriously Justin, you do not need that much junk food!"

"Seriously Carly," Justin mimicked her. "Do you remember how long this trip is? I need my previsions."

Grabbing the first thing Carly could get to she held it out in front of him. "Peanut M&M's are previsions?"

"Hey, give those back! I'm a growing boy."

"You're nineteen, Baby. I think you're about done growing. But the boy part? Yeah, completely true."

"Why thank you." Justin took her words as a compliment until their true meaning sunk in. "Wait, what?"

Carly and Raleigh could only laugh as they waited for Bobbie to finish cashing out. When he finally emerged from the gas station holding the same things as Justin, Carly just shook her head.

"Ya know, Ray, if I ate that shit I'd blow up like a balloon."

"Guys have no idea how great they have it."

"Girl, you are preaching to the choir." Raleigh smiled at Carly before looking to Justin and Bobbie.

"You guys ready now?"

Bobbie stopped and took a second to look at everything in his bags. "Yup, I think I'm good. Oh, Ray I got you a fast break."

"Yummy, thanks." She held out her hands as Bobbie tossed her the candy bar.

After driving with no sound other than the hum of the engine and the music coming from the radio for a half hour, Justin decided it was time they play a game. "Alright you guys, plates?"

"Mm, no. I spy."

"Carly, that's completely childish."

"Oh looks who's talking, Bobbie." Raleigh retorted, throwing an empty pop bottle at his head.

"I hate to inform you, dear sister, but I am all man." Raleigh's laugh was cut off by a loud choking sound coming from Carly.

"Bobbie, you really shouldn't make someone laugh when they're drinking. Don't you know it's rude to make a girl spew coke out of her nose?"

"Always the comedian."

"Ok you guys, how about the radio game?"

"No, Ray, nobody can ever beat you!"

"That is not true!" Raleigh defended herself. "It's practically impossible to know every single song ever made."

"Yeah but you're pretty damn close." Sighing animatedly, Raleigh rolled her eyes and gave up the fight before it could start.

"Fine then. What game would you like to play, oh holy one?"

"Ok, we'll play the radio game, but if you get every single one right for ten minutes, we're playing something else. Deal?"

"Fine by me. Let's start." Turning around back to the radio, Bobbie put his hand on the dial before asking if everyone was ready. When he got their yes' he began to turn. When the first song they came to began blaring through the speakers, Bobbie stopped and waited to see if he knew just what the melody playing was.

Before even ten seconds passed, Raleigh called out, "You Oughta Know, Alanis Morrissette."

"Come on, see?! You're starting already!"

"Bobbie, you are such a baby! That one was so easy! Why don't you actually give me a challenge?"

"Well I'm sorry, my dear sister, but I don't control what they play on the air." turning back to the radio, Bobbie turned until he came to the next song playing.

Only a few seconds had passed before Justin smacked the steering wheel and yelled out, "Fire Of Unknown Origin, B-O-C!"

"Oh, looks like Ray's got some competition." Carly teased.

"Well, its about time."

"Ok, ok can we keep going please?"

"Don't be a sore loser already, Ray." Bobbie smiled at his sister before turning the dial once again.

They were playing for nearly an hour, the score tied between Bobbie and Carly with three each, Justin was in second with twelve, and Raleigh was of course winning with fifteen, when the next song that Bobbie found to play made Raleigh's good mood go sour. She'd been so happy, smiling and laughing with her friends, having a great time when that song had begun to play. Why did she have to be a musician? Why did she have to associate everything with a certain song?

Why couldn't she let go? Must he constantly plague her mind? She left him behind, she'd intended to move on, but now she couldn't shake thoughts of their short time spent together from her mind. All she could think of was his smile, his long, slightly curled brown hair, his deep green eyes that seemed to see right into your soul. All she could feel were his arms around her, holding her to him tight. The arms that she might never feel around her again.

Why was this so hard?

She'd known Dan only a little over three months. She shouldn't feel this strongly for him. No, it was all in her head. She liked him sure, but they could never really be together. Not like she and Josh had been. Not like she knew he wanted and deserved. He was, after all, twenty four and she barely eighteen. Her leaving was for the best.

But still, as the song continued to play, she couldn't help but to think of that first morning she'd woken in his bed and went downstairs to find him singing and bopping his head to this song. It was the first time since she'd been in LA that she'd truly smiled.

~*~

Grabbing the blue shirt Dan had thrown on the chair, Raleigh threw it on and made her way downstairs and into the kitchen where he was cooking breakfast. She tried not to laugh as she watched him bop his head and sing along to the radio. Hearing him try to reach the high notes of the song as he moved around was just too much.

"REO Speedwagon?" Seeing the startled expression on his face caused her to burst out laughing.

"Damn straight, REO. You have any objections?"

"No, not at all. I just wasn't aware that men liked them too."

"Well, lucky for you I'm comfortable enough in my sexuality to admit that I like some heart felt music." He said, wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing her lightly on the lips. "Good morning, beautiful."

"Good morning." And good is just what it was.

~*~

"Ray?" Hearing Carly's voice, Raleigh forced her thoughts away.

"Yeah?" Raleigh asked, wiping away any trace of tears that might have built up in her eyes before turning to face them.

"You know every single REO Speedwagon song ever recorded. Why did you not jump at this one?"

"I just got lost in my thoughts. Can you turn it off, Bobbie?"

"Ray, you love this song. Why..."

"Just turn it off! Ok?" Raleigh hadn't meant to snap at her brother, but she couldn't take the heart felt lyrics anymore. She couldn't take her happy memories anymore. She felt like she was slowly losing her mind the more she thought of Dan. This wasn't the way to get over him and forget all about the three and a half months she'd spent in LA.

After a short silence, Justin cleared his throat and spoke, changing the subject. "It's getting pretty late. The next city is Flagstaff, Arizona. Sound ok to stay the night there?"

Bobbie and Carly said that it would be fine for the night while Raleigh continued to stare out at the scenery passing her by.

After getting off their exit nearly an hour later, they didn't see the hotel so Justin decided he would just pull into the first gas station he came to and while he was filling up the car someone could go in and ask for directions.

Having to stretch her legs, Raleigh elected to go inside and ask.

"The comfort inn? Yeah, when you leave here, turn right onto South Milton and keep going down until the bend, there it turns into East Santa Fe Avenue. It'll be right there on your left, just after North Humphrey."

"Thank you so much."

"My pleasure little lady." The old man winked at her and gave her a toothless grin and Raleigh felt incredibly uncomfortable. Slowly walking away, she just offered him a polite smile before turning and walking faster out of the small gas station.

"Ok, next time we need directions anywhere, you guys are going in to ask. I've been creeped out enough by the hillbilly guy to last me a lifetime."

"What's the matter, Ray? I thought you liked older guys. Oh no, wait, it's the old wrinkly balls, isn't it?"

Stopping dead in her tracks, Raleigh just looked at her brother with her mouth gaping wide open.

"You should shut your mouth. Wouldn't want bugs to take up campgrounds in there."

Going over to Bobbie, Raleigh raised her fist and punched him in his arm. "You're such an ass."

"Ow, Raleigh Jean, that hurt!" Bobbie's face scrunched up in pain as he rubbed the spot that had connected with her fist.

"Well you shouldn't say such insensitive things to your baby sister. Besides, all the funny that joke may have held on Thanksgiving was washed right out the second I left Dan." Giving Bobbie one more dirty look, Raleigh threw open her door to the car and got in, slamming it shut behind her.

"Woah! No matter what your deal is please, do not take it out on my baby!" Justin said, flailing his arms in the air for emphasis. Carly's window was open so Raleigh called out an apology to Justin before resuming her silence.

The ten minute ride to the hotel was uncomfortably quiet and Carly and Raleigh checked them into a room while the boys grabbed their bags, ready to lug them up to what ever room they were given. After getting the room keys, they all found their way to the room and they all decided to settle into a game of crazy eights. After a few rounds of that they decided to switch to nine hole golf. When they came to the eighth hole, Carly insisted Justin was cheating and they all decided to call it a night.

After putting on their pajamas, they decided who was sleeping with who since there were only two queen beds.

"Carly, you and Justin can have that bed and I guess me and my evil twin get this one. Wouldn't want the guys sharing a bed."

"God no, they'll complain about it all night and all the way home." Carly laughed as they settled into their beds. They lied there awake for a little while just talking some more until eventually, they all heard Bobbie's soft snores. Then Carly fell into unconsciousness and then finally, Justin.

Raleigh lied there for a long time, exactly how long she didn't know, but she did know that no matter how hard she tried, or how badly she wanted it, she wasn't going to get to sleep. Not with her mind racing the way it was. Deciding the only way she'd get her thoughts to stop, or at least slow, was to put them onto paper. Raleigh slowly rolled out of bed as to not disturb her brother, and she went over to her suitcase. After taking out her high school hoodie and throwing it on over her tank top and sliding her feet into her fuzzy red slippers, she grabbed her little notebook and pen out of her purse.

After setting it down, she was fully planning on just leaving when something caught her eye. Opening her purse back up, she looked down at the pack of Marlboros in there. Deciding one might help calm her, she grabbed the pack, along with her lighter, and then headed out the door after grabbing a key.

Once she got to the pool area, Raleigh sat at a table and, after lighting a cigarette and taking a long, much needed, drag, she opened her notebook and uncapped her pen.

She didn't know how long she'd been sitting there, but she'd smoked three of her smooths and had finished three verses of a song she didn't know she'd be writing. She noticed that somehow after her last verse she'd begun writing the lyrics to the REO Speedwagon song she'd heard earlier in the car.

Maybe this was getting to her far worse than she'd ever imagined. Is this how Dan was feeling at that very moment? Left there in his large, lonely home afraid to do anything because it would make the fact that she'd left that much more real? Was he shedding the tears he hadn't shed when she said her goodbyes? Was he cursing the fact that she'd ever walked into his classroom at the end of August?

Had he already gotten over her?

Feeling the tears welling in her eyes again, Raleigh closed them and tried to rub the unshed tears away.

"What is wrong with me? He doesn't love me." Shaking her head, Raleigh whispered her next words of denial. "I don't love him."

"You don't sound too sure of that."

Whipping her head up to the sound of the unfamiliar voice, Raleigh was shocked to see that she no longer was alone on the patio.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to frighten you."

Shaking her head while wiping her eyes, Raleigh let out a small laugh. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was speaking out loud."

The handsome man shrugged as he smiled at her. Raleigh couldn't help but feel as if she knew him from somewhere. "It's alright. In all fairness you did think you were alone. Mind if I join you?" He motioned towards the table and when Raleigh shook her head he immediately sat down. "So, boy trouble?"

"You might say that." Raleigh felt her guard go up and she knew he noticed it.

"I'm sorry, it's not my place and I shouldn't have been eavesdropping. Well, really I wasn't eavesdropping, I was just surprised that the first words you'd spoke since I've been out here were to yourself." Against her better judgment, Raleigh felt herself laugh. Suddenly it clicked in her head just who this guy was and why he seemed so familiar.

"Hey, you're Martin Johnson, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I am. Fan?" Was that modesty in his eyes? Or fright at having been recognized by a maybe-fan?

"You might say that." Picking up her pack of cigarettes, Raleigh pulled out her fourth and lit it. She offered one to Martin and he took one with a smile.

"Shouldn't smoke. These things will kill you." He said the words as he put the end in his mouth and picked up her lighter and lit it.

"Hypocrite."

"Guilty." He leaned back in his chair and blew out the smoke. "Millington High, huh? You're a long way from home."

"I've been in LA."

"Oh yeah? How did you like it there?"

"Uh, well, it definitely had its ups and downs. I'm ready to go home now."

"Yeah, there's no place like home. How long were you there?"

"End of August. I was going to the Hollywood Academy Of Music." Raleigh didn't really know what to make of Martin's facial expression so she just sat there, waiting for him to say something. He looked as if he'd been shocked.

"You're Raleigh Coons! I knew you looked familiar. Your hair had me thrown for a loop."

"Ok, how do you know who I am?" To say that she was a little surprised that he knew who she was would have been a huge understatement.

"Let's just say I'm a Rent fan."

"Oh." Raleigh couldn't hide the surprise in her voice.

"Yeah, the guys make fun of me for it, but in all fairness I did take my sister. She really wanted to see it and she couldn't fly to New York for the Broadway show. And I have to tell you, you made an amazing Mimi."

"Well, thank you, Martin." He just smiled at her before looking down to the notebook she was picking at.

"Writing a song?"

Biting her lip, Raleigh took a minute to answer him. "Kind of. Well, it started out that way then went horribly wrong."

"I'm sure you're just being modest. You seemed to be a very talented young lady. Can I see?"

"Uh, no." Raleigh felt herself smiling at him. "Like I said, it started out as a song I'm writing but then turned into the song I've had on my mind for a while now." She had a feeling she knew why it had turned into Don't Wanna Lose You just after she'd written "but they don't know the truth."

Did she even know the truth? She could only think of how she'd asked Dan what the truth was just yesterday. He'd told her the truth was that he loved her. She refused to believe he actually did.

Martin only raised his eyebrow at her before quickly grabbing the notebook out of her grasp. Opening it, he fought off Raleigh as she tried to grab it back.

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

But nothing's greater than the risk
That comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy
Maybe, Maybe

But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth

You left this morning on an early plane
You left your picture behind to haunt me
You left in a steady rain
You say you'll miss me, say you want me

I'm left this mornin with a world of doubt
I'm left this mornin indecently exposed
So much we never did talk about
And your kiss goodbye, said the case is closed

I don't want to lose you
I don't want to lose the best love that I've ever found
Don't want to lose you
Why didn't I cry when you said goodbye
Why didn't I break down, break down and say
I don't want to lose you

When he was done reading the lyrics she had scrawled out onto the paper, he looked at Raleigh with a raised eyebrow once again.

"REO Speedwagon?"

"Yes, REO. Do you have a problem with that? And I'm surprised you even know who they are."

"Are you kidding? My mom loves Kevin Cronin. Says he sings it from the heart."

"I happen to agree."

"Please. He sings it from the hair, there's a difference." After giving the lyrics she'd written one more look over, he closed the notebook and handed it back to her. "Your lyrics are actually really good. You have some serious talent."

"You can gather that from two verses that aren't even close to being called lyrics?"

"Yes, I can." Putting out his burned down cigarette, Martin put his elbows on the table and leaned forward. "So why did you really leave the academy?"

Looking down at the table, Raleigh began picking at the cover of her notebook again. "A lot of stuff went down over the past week that I just needed to get away from. So my friends came to get me and I made the great escape." Raleigh couldn't help the smile that formed on her lips. "Pun intended."

"That's funny, really." Looking at his watch, Martin let out a curse.

"What?"

"It's almost three AM. I have to be up by six to drive to Phoenix." Standing up, Martin held out his hand to Raleigh. "It was nice talking to you, Raleigh Coons."

"And you, Martin Johnson."

"I'll see you around."

"Sure." When he was back inside the hotel, Raleigh shook her head. "You're a celebrity. Sure you'll see me around." After gathering her things, Raleigh decided to head back up to the room and try to get some sleep. She had a long day ahead of her. Best to at least try to get some rest.

*Lyrics from Bleeding Love By Leona Lewis & I Don't Want To Lose You By REO Speedwagon