I sit uncomfortably in the small chair assigned to me as Justin practices his routine on stage in Georgia. I stopped watching the routine about three shows in, if I thought motion sickness could be caught, I would be taking Dramamine right about now. He does those motions over and over to the point he started making me dizzy. I feel someone grab my shoulders and I turn around, “Hey Derek.”
“Hi, how’s it going?”
“Just fine so far. You looking for Gia?”
He nods, “That girl moves faster than anyone else I’ve ever met.”
“You can thank Johnny for that one. Poor thing was up on her feet for nineteen hours yesterday doing miscellaneous things to get the tour back on track. I think she was getting some caffeine from the trailer, you should try there first.”
“So how are you and Jake?”
I smile, “Did he send you here to ask that or is this some sort of friendly check up on my dating life?”
Derek looks sheepish, “Okay, I talked to him this morning and wanted me to see how you were. How you have neglected to return his calls, stuff like that.”
Now it’s my turn to feel sheepish, “I got in so late that I didn’t call him last night. I know he left me a message.”
“He’s crazy about you. Jake was just making sure he hadn’t done anything.”
“He hasn’t done anything.”
Derek laughs, “I didn’t think it was anything but I was told to make sure.”
I put my hand on top of his as Derek gets up to find Gia. The music blaring overhead stops and I turn back around to see Justin heading my way. I hand him a bottle of Gatorade and a towel. He wipes the excess sweat off his body and takes a long sip from the bottle, “Having fun up there?”
Justin wipes his mouth, “You have no idea. I forgot what it’s like to be up there without being high on something.”
“Mmmm, I bet it does.”
Justin sits down next to me, “You think we can get some time to hangout later?”
I’m puzzled by the request and look at him curiously. He immediately notices the look and clears the air, “I haven’t had Trace with me in a while and I’m dying for a little company.”
I got through the schedule and browse over it, “You have some time before and after the concert.”
“Cool. I’ve finish up here so we can go out or grab some lunch.”
I nod and put my purse on my shoulder as I stand up. A pair of arm encircle Justin shoulders and do up to his eyes, covering them, “Surprise!”
Justin turns around to find Cameron standing behind him. She smiles and hugs him tightly. I back up, giving them some space as my phone starts to ring. Justin breaks from Cameron with a look of shock clearly on his face. He looks over at me as though I might have known she was coming but I shrug my shoulders, holding up one finger while I answer the call from Jake.
________________________________________________________________________
“Cam, I thought you said that you would be here tomorrow, I had the whole day planned.” I say, my head spinning. Lying has never gotten me never far but by the look on Cameron’s face, I had better come up with something.
“Aww, that’s so sweet but I have a call back for a new movie tomorrow so I decided to fly down today.”
I swallow hard and look over to Beth, who’s busy gushing over the phone. She giggles softly and bites her nail a little the way a girl in high school might twist her hair around her finger when talking to a guy she had a crush on. Jake probably. I turn back to Cameron, “Well I’m glad you’re here.”
She smiles and kisses me, “Me too. You want to go walk around the pier or something? I know it’s really hot outside so we could hang out at the beach or something afterwards. Maybe grab something to eat.”
Damn, “I kind of told Beth that I would go out with her.”
“Who the fuck is Beth?” Cameron asks. I can see her blood boiling in front of me and I really don’t want to get into it with her.
“Beth is my personal assistant. Remember, you met her outside of the rehab center the day I entered.”
Cam puts her hand on her hip, “No, I don’t remember her.”
Beth hangs up the phone and comes over to me. Before she can speak I take her hand and stand her in front of me, “This is my personal assistant Bethany Addison, Beth this is Cameron.”
Cameron barely touches Beth’s outstretched hand, “Hi.”
“Hi.” Beth says softly.
“So if it’s okay with Beth, we can all go out.” I offer. Cameron looks like she’s going to blow a fuse, but what the hell am I supposed to do?
Beth cheeks are bright red, “Um, Jake kind of called and said he’s only thirty minutes from here so you guys can go ahead without me. That is if you don’t need me to do something.”
“Well if you have to.” Cameron seethes. Apparently Beth isn’t going to be on her Christmas list this year.
“Naw, I don’t need anything.”
Beth clears her throat, “I’ll see you later Justin. Call if you need anything.”
I watch Beth leave the arena and Cameron hits me hard on the chest. I lick my lips before looking ay her, trying my best not to try and kill her, “Yes?”
“What is wrong with you? Since when do you ask your assistant to accompany us out?”
“Since I had asked her first.” I answer.
“Okay here’s a better question, why would you even ask her?”
I run my hands up and down my face, “Cam, I don’t want to get into this right now. Do you want to go out or not?”
“Fine, let’s go.”
Cameron storms past me and I follow her out to her car. I get in and just let Cameron drive until she lets off some steam. After about twenty minutes she pulls into a parking lot across from the beach and puts it in park, “Look, I don’t want to fight with you. We are supposed to be working on our relationship.”
I sigh, “Okay Cam.”
“Alright, let’s go get some sun.”
We make our way through photographers and onto the beach. I sit down and Cameron sits in my lap, “We can make this whole thing work Jay.”
I don’t say anything as her head leans against my chest. Somehow it just doesn’t feel right there anymore. In fact, I’m not sure it ever did.
________________________________________________________________________
About four o’clock Cam and I decided to take a ride around the town before going back to the arena. The sunset is really beautiful and Cam and I had a fine day of making small talk. Small talk. As in nothing even remotely close to having an actual connection. But I suppose it’s always been like this and I’m not sure what I was expecting.
“Look at all the people dancing on that platform. Come on.” Cam says, grabbing my hand.
People are slow dancing on a couple of platforms as slow music plays over the speakers. Cameron pulls me towards the platforms until I stop dead in my tracks. Beth is slow dancing with Jake. Her head is on his chest and he whirls her around the area. Cameron tugs on my hand, “What’s the matter?”
I don’t say anything and she pulls on my arm again. I ignore her once again and watch the two of them interact with one another, laughing and dancing hand in hand. Cameron finally grabs my face and pulls it down to look at her, “Hello? What the fuck is wrong?”
“Nothing, I just don’t want to dance anymore.” I protest, turning around quickly and walking back to the car.
Cameron quickens her steps, “What is wrong with you?”
“Let’s just go.”
“Fine, be an ass. Remind me why I put up with your temper tantrums.”
I watch out the window as we drive away and I can see Beth kiss Jake. I swear I’m going to be sick. And I don’t even know why.
________________________________________________________________________
“So I guess I’ll call you later.” Jake says, kissing me.
“Yeah, you better.” I smirk.
Jake leans in like he’s going to tell me a secret and rubs our noses together, “I am completely falling for you, just in case you were wondering.”
I feel butterflies in my stomach and give him one last kiss goodbye, “I’ll see you soon.”
“Count on it.”
I just spent an amazing day with a guy I actually like. We went out for lunch and hung out at the local shops before going to this little area on the beach where you could dance. I swear it was the most romantic thing I have done in so long. I watched the show from the back as I watched out for Cameron. I swear she looks like something from the exorcist when she lays eyes on me. I thought her head might just spin around.
Justin and Cameron went back stage for a party with some of her friends and I picked up some of his things to get ready to leave tonight. I put his things in his bag when Gia opens the door, “Hon, your soul mate is getting himself into some trouble in the back room.”
I hop up and Gia points to the room as her name is screamed, “I’ll see you later.”
I rush into the room where Cameron has got a bottle of Jack Daniels in her hand and pouring him a glass, pushing it in front of him, “Justin, don’t be a pussy.”
His expression is blank and I try to make my way through the crowd surrounding them chanting, “Drink, drink, drink.” The nest thing you know they’ll be shouting, “Toga, toga.”
I push my way through and grab the glass from his hand, “What are you doing?”
Justin looks at me guiltily as well as angry that I would embarrass him that way, “Leave me alone.”
Anger swells in me at all these people who are just adding to the pressure. They all know what he’s been through and yet they still try to fuck him. And then there’s her. I shoot my glare at Cameron and spout out at the mouth before I can stop myself, “And what are you doing? What the hell kind of girlfriend are you to do that to him?”
Cameron stands up from her chair and I immediately cover my mouth in shock. Oh shit.
“Who the fuck do you think you are talking to?” Cameron demands.
I feel someone behind me grab my back and pull me towards them, “Let’s go.”
Justin pulls me from the room as Cameron follows us and Tiny comes out of the car as we exit the arena. Justin stops as I get in the vehicle, “Listen Cam, we can talk about this tomorrow okay? She didn’t mean anything by it.”
And now I know
Spanish Harlem are not just pretty words to say
I thought I knew
But now I know that rose trees never grow in New York City
Until you've seen this trash can dream come true
You stand at the edge while people run you through
And I thank the Lord there's people out there like you
I thank the Lord there's people out there like you
“Nothing? Justin your fucking groupie mouthed off at me and you defend her?” Cameron says, practically foaming at the mouth.
“She’s not a groupie, she’s my assistant. Besides, she had a point.”
I look out from the car and I can’t see Cameron since Justin’s body blocks my view but I can imagine how she’s looking at him, “Fuck you Justin.”
While Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters
Sons of bankers, sons of lawyers
Turn around and say good morning to the night
For unless they see the sky
But they can't and that is why
They know not if it's dark outside or light
This Broadway's got
It's got a lot of songs to sing
If I knew the tunes I might join in
I'll go my way alone
Grow my own, my own seeds shall be sown in New York City
She storms off and Justin swears under his breath and Tiny gets us in safely. I put my face in my hands and pull my knees up to my body, “I’m so sorry Justin.”
“It’s fine.” He mutters.
“I’m so sorry.” I sniffle through my tears that silently hit my clothes.
As soon as we pull up to the hotel I go running inside as fast as I can, slamming the door behind me. Well I am officially fucked. I mouthed off at Cameron Diaz, made an ass of myself in front of twenty or so people and Justin now hates me. Just great.
Subway's no way for a good man to go down
Rich man can ride and the hobo he can drown
And I thank the Lord for the people I have found
I thank the Lord for the people I have found
While Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters
Sons of bankers, sons of lawyers
Turn around and say good morning to the night
For unless they see the sky
But they can't and that is why
They know not if it's dark outside or light
Elton John- Mona Lisa’s & Mad Hatters
