Knowing that they could do nothing but wait, the Coons family just sat and waited. Waited for anything, anything that would tell them how she was or even what happened. When Deb received the phone call, all the man had said was she was being treated in the ER at Hollywood Community Hospital. No details, no time frame. They had no choice...waiting was all there was to do.

He didn't know how long it had been since they arrived, was it five minutes that seemed to drag on for hours, or had it been longer? All he knew was that the love of his life was fighting for her own somewhere behind those large wooden doors. And he knew nothing was ever going to be the same. If she didn't pull through and fight off whatever it was causing this nightmare, he would die. She was too big a part of his life now. And if she did make it through the darkness, this would weigh on their shoulders for a long time to come. He knew this was not going to be something that was easily covered up and forgotten. Raleigh was fighting for her life, and they were all fighting not to break down and cry.

Finally, a doctor, clad in his lab coat, came out to speak with them. "Mr. And Mrs. Coons? I'm doctor Richards." He shook their hands politely, but never offered them a smile. They knew whatever it was he had to tell them about their daughter, was not good news. "Raleigh is stable, we were able to get a response from her finally."

"Oh thank heavens." Deb breathed a large sigh of relief as she leaned against her husband, who wrapped his arms around her for comfort.

"Doctor, why is she here in this condition? What happened?"

"Mr. Coons, from what little information we were able to gather from the young man who brought her in, we found out your daughter was at a Christmas party tonight. She had a large amount of cocaine and ecstasy in her system so we had to pump her stomach and then her lungs gave out. We put her on a ventilator that will continue to breathe for her until she wakes up and begins to breathe on her own." Pausing, the Coons knew there was more to come, more that was probably much worse. "Her blood alcohol levels were well over the legal limit as well. And since she is underage and these drugs are highly illegal, we are under obligation to report this to the authorities. When she wakes up officer Jones will be here to take her statement."

Shaking her head, Deb finally let a tear fall freely down her cheek. What had they done wrong with her? What made her do the things she did? "Can we see her?"

Nodding, Doctor Richards turned and led them down the hallway to their daughter's room. Seeing the fragile looking girl laying motionless on the bed with all those wires hooked to her from various machines, Deb ran to her daughter's side and cried harder. She almost lost her baby girl. What had been happening at school that Raleigh wasn't telling? Why had she resorted to using drugs? Was it the pressure to fit in? Or had she been forced to do things she wouldn't normally do? The Raleigh they all knew would never do things like this.

But was she still really the Raleigh they all knew?

Clutching the key in her hand, Raleigh felt the excitement course through her,. She was here, finally on her own chasing her dreams. She no longer had to worry about her parents looking over her shoulder every second of the day and controlling her every move. She was here, in Los Angeles, far away from home, on her own and she fully intended to live her life the way she saw fit. Now all that stood between her and her freedom was the door that allowed her entry to her new home for the next four semesters.

Moving down to the handle, Raleigh slid the key into the hole and turned. She opened the door and walked in, practically stopping dead. Her room was huge and had her own bathroom, which she hadn't been expecting at all. Hollywood's School for the Arts was definitely a dream come true for someone from Shelby, Tennessee.

Noticing that her roommate hadn't shown up yet, Raleigh chose the bed farthest from the door and began unpacking her things. She was in heaven.

About a half hour later Raleigh had all her clothes put away and had just finished setting up her desk when she figured her roommate had arrived. Outside the door she could hear a girl complaining about something and fiddling with keys.

"Its just bullshit. I was doing just fine in my single, why do they feel the need to kick me out and stick me in a double?"

"Girl, relax. It'll be fine and with your grades form last semester, the only time you should be spending in here is to sleep anyway."

"Yeah, yeah. Might as well go in. See what she's like." Raleigh heard the other girl agree and she pretended she hadn't just been eavesdropping when they walked in.

Standing up from her computer chair, Raleigh smiled as she went over to the two girls. "Hi. I'm Raleigh. One of yours' roommate."

"That would be me. I'm Autumn."

"Its nice to meet you." This girl was completely Hollywood. Tall, thin, big chest, eyes that seemed as though they were silver, contacts most likely, and her hair was different colors. You could tell it was naturally dark, like her own. There were streaks of blond, red and even some blue all throughout. Aside from the girl's crazy head of hair, she was positively gorgeous. Raleigh knew she couldn't even pale in comparison.

"Yeah, you too. At least it seems like I have a normal roomy." Raleigh rose an eyebrow at the girl but decided not to say anything.

"Um, I took that bed ever there, do you mind?"

"No, that's fine. Oh this is Ember. We met last semester."

"Hi." Ember gave Raleigh a nod in acknowledgment and looked away. Raleigh could already tell that she was a bitch, but Autumn...she seemed nice enough.

"Listen, I gotta drag all my shit in here so I'm sorry if we disturb you at all."

"Hey, do you want some help?"

"Sure. My old dorm is at the end of the hall."

As Raleigh helped them move her things into their dorm, she learned some things about Autumn. She was a vocal major and had failed all of her classes last semester so she was stuck with all of the same classes. She wasn't too open for discussion about why she had flunked so Raleigh dropped the subject figuring something had happened. The girl seemed very sweet and caring as she spoke about her family and friends back home in the valley. It made Raleigh think about Shelby and everyone she left there. She could feel the homesickness kick in full speed and she knew it was going to be a rough few weeks. She already missed Carly and her brothers and sister, and even the guys. But most of all, she missed Josh. He would be leaving for school tomorrow and then Raleigh had no idea when she'd see him again. Most likely thanksgiving. They had decided, after Josh had finally forgiven her, that a long distance relationship was out of the question this time. So for now, they remained friends.

As the days and weeks went by, Raleigh became more used to being on her own and not having her controlling mother on her back for everything she did. She actually really liked it. It was the first time she felt free. She still missed Josh insanely though. They called one another when they got the free time and Josh had promised to go out and visit on one of his long weekends, but money was a little short for him at the moment.

As for Raleigh, she had started the semester off incredibly well. She went to every class and did excellent. Her professors all loved her and she'd be lying if she said she didn't have a slight crush on a certain one as well. But being the good southern girl she was, she could never act on the feelings of infatuation. It just wasn't right.

While Raleigh sat on her bed writing in her journal and jamming to The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, she thought about her first month in LA. She and Autumn had become really good friends, Ember still despised her, and she was the best student her vocal coach has. She had even managed a few other friends in there as well. Just as her thoughts roamed to her family, friends and Josh once again, Autumn barged in and ripped the headphones from her ears.

"Hey! What are you doing?" Autumn grabbed her hands and pulled her to her feet.

"Get your purse, let's go."

"Go? Go where?" Autumn turned to her and smiled coyly.

"Shopping."

"Why?"

"Raleigh, no offence honey, but you scream southern country. We need to update you wardrobe. You're in LA now. Not Tennessee, down home on the farm."

"Autumn, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but I'm comfortable in these clothes. This is me. That southern country girl. I don't know, nor do I want to be, anything else."

"Alright, the real reason I wanted to take you shopping is because we're going to a party tonight."

"Oh, Autumn, I don't know. I have a lot of homework..."

"Oh come on Raleigh! You're in LA and we all know you don't need this school. You're already the best. Besides, all you do is go to class and practice. Its time to let loose and party. Just...I can tell you really miss your home. You need to get out and have a good time."

Looking her roommate, Raleigh knew she was right. She hadn't been out once yet and a party really sounded great right now. Sighing, she slipped on her sneakers and grabbed her purse.

"Ok, let's go."

"Yay!" Autumn jumped up and down and grabbed her hand, pulling her out the door."

"Wait! Who invited us? Whose party is it?" Autumn turned to look innocently a Raleigh and she now know why she had that coy smile earlier.

"Effron Walker." Then she bounced out the door and down the hall, leaving Raleigh to chase after her, demanding details.

Effron Walker.

What was there to say about him except that he was insanely gorgeous, standing six foot three, well built with broad shoulders, and normally dark chocolate hair that had practically been bleached by the California sun. He had a nice, even tan and beautiful emerald eyes. Not only was he great to look at, he was great to talk to. His voice was smooth and even and he was incredibly intelligent to boot.

Effron was the guy every girl wanted and every guy wanted to be. It was impossible to hate him. Much like herself, he wasn't from California. He had grown up in Australia and his dad moved them to LA after his mother died when he was eleven years old. His slight accent just made him all the more appealing.

Not to mention, he had been interested in Raleigh. Just the thought of what could happen at the party with him made her wish it was already time to go. She would never get too serious with him because she was still very much in love with Josh and knew they would get married eventually, but they weren't together right now. Raleigh wanted to have some fun, and so she would.

"So what time are we going tonight?" Raleigh asked as she browsed through some tops, trying find something Autumn would approve of. "Oh this is cute." She plucked the top off the rack and held it up to herself. Facing Autumn, she asked, "What do you think?"

"We're leaving at nine and you are not wearing that!"

"Oh come on!"

"Raleigh, its hideous! And peach." Autumns face contorted into one of pure disgust and Raleigh had to laugh as she hung it back on the rack.

"I'm sorry that my tastes don't match yours. Can't I just go to hot topic?"

"No you can not. How about this? It would look really cute with a pair of dark jean capris."

"Oh and those shoes I just spent fifty bucks on. We have a winner!"

Autumn laughed as she watched Raleigh twirl with the top held up against her. "girl, you are straight trippin'."

"No, I'm excited!"

"Oh right,. Because of a certain someone who invited you to his party."

"Come on, Autumn. Every girl in the entire school wants him. You know very well that if he were into you you'd be much worse than me."

"I know, but its not me is it? Therefore I can rip on you about it as much as I want."

Raleigh couldn't even form a come back she was so excited. So she just hummed the song playing over the store's speakers and kept looking through the racks for something for Autumn to wear tonight. Along with all the excitement Raleigh felt, she also felt nervous. Josh was the only guy she had ever been with, that she counted. James didn't matter and she tried to keep herself from thinking about that one night nearly eight months ago. Could she really just do a hook up without it affecting her? She was good at pretending nothing was wrong and could probably pass for being happy Josh was in New York seeing other girls, most likely Erin O'Mally. Just thinking about the girl made her skin crawl. She knew Erin wanted Josh and would stop at nothing to get him and she was pretty sure he was telling the truth when he said he had never been with or wanted Erin. But it still bothered the hell out of her knowing she got to see him everyday while she was stuck on the other side of the country, literally. But tonight, she was going to forget all that. She was going to get dressed up, party with her new friends, and have a great time, possibly with Effron Walker.

It was the first and only thing to come to Raleigh's mind as she entered Effron's home. His father was pretty well off that he rented a house for his only son. It was a two story home with three bedrooms and two baths. There was a room off the back hall that a lot of people tended to crash in after parties like this.

Before Raleigh could really begin to appreciate the home, Autumn pulled her to the kitchen to get drinks and then out back by the pool where the party seemed to be in full swing. As Autumn ran off to talk to Ember and a few of her other friends, Raleigh joined a group of people she knew form her classes. Coming to LA, she had expected egotistical, self-righteous people. While there were those select few, Ember was a perfect example, most of the people were nice, down to earth, and laid back.

She had just finished listening to a joke Airyk had told and her laughing was cut short when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Turning around, Raleigh's breath got caught in her throat when she found herself looking into those beautiful emerald eyes, belonging to a very gorgeous, very bare-chested Effron Walker.

"Hello, love. I was wondering when you were going to show." The smoothness of his voice, the slight accent, they were aphrodisiacs all their own.

"Well, I'm here so you can stop wondering."

"Well, the moment I saw you I began to wonder something else entirely."

"Yeah? What's that?"

"Why is that beautiful southern bell over there conversing with those losers when she could be dancing with this beaut?"

"Maybe she was waiting for the big gesture."

"Now that I've made it, dance with me, love?"

"I would love to." Raleigh couldn't help the smile that erupted on her face as she took his hand and followed him to the patio where music was blaring. As they danced, Raleigh felt like she really got to know him. Aside from her siblings, they really didn't have that many differences.

Over the course of the next few hours, Raleigh found herself going between playing bullshit pyramid, asshole, and dancing with Effron outside. She couldn't help but to think of how his body felt up against her own, how wonderfully erotic his hands on her felt. Her flesh felt like it was on fire, her senses going into overdrive as their eyes held one another. She never wanted to kiss and touch a man who wasn't Josh so badly.

Josh.

Dammit, now why did she have to go there? He was off in New York having fun and she was trying to do the same but her thoughts always seemed to go full circle, always going back to him in the end. To hell with that. She was going to have a good tonight no matter what.

"Come on, Effron. I need another drink." Autumn chose that moment to show her face and pull them into the kitchen, getting everyone to make them do body shots of tequila. Raleigh had only done tequila once before and had been the worst night of her life. She was going to kill her later. But sucking it up, Raleigh faced Effron, ready for whatever he was going to do.

He slowly closed the gap between their bodies and pulled her long hair to the left side. Leaning down, Raleigh tried not to close her eyes as she felt his tongue going along her neck. She knew he was taking his sweet time just to torture her, but she didn't mind one bit. She liked having his lips on her. He finally pulled away slightly, and poured the salt on the wet spot he had just created before delving back in. After making sure he had lapped it all up, he took a step back and downed the liquid, burning all the way down to his stomach. Wasting no time, he immediately put his mouth to Raleigh's, releasing her of the sour lemon. When he was done, Raleigh followed his moves exactly. When they were done, Effron rounded up Raleigh, Autumn, Ember, and Davey and they all went downstairs into a room in the finished basement.

Raleigh had no idea what they were planning on doing but the drunken state she was in seemed instantly gone when Davey pulled a baggy out of his pocket.

A baggy full of a white powder.

She wasn't positive but Raleigh knew it was cocaine. Should she really be surprised though? They were college kids in Los Angeles for crying out loud! It was no hidden fact that LA was the underbelly of the most well known drug lords. It was just that she had never been faced with it before.

She watched as Davey poured the substance on the glass coffee table and cut it into short, even lines. As the tube went around the group. Her heart began to pound in her chest. What was she going to do? How could she even ask herself that? She simply would say "no thank you" and go back upstairs. No big deal. But damn if that bitch could keep her mouth shut.

The tube came to Effron and he leaned down, quickly inhaling the drug. Wiping his nose as he sniffed a little bit, he turned and held it to Raleigh. Moment of truth.

"Uh..."

"You've never done this before?" Effron raised his eyebrows at her and she felt so foolish. What was she doing here?

"No. I've never even seen it before."

"Try it, Ray. I promise you you'll like it." Davey said, leaning forward looking at her.

"Raleigh, look, no one is going to make you do anything you don't want to. We're just all having fun here." The look in his eyes was sincere and she knew he was a big sweetheart.

"Look, if she's too damned scared to try it leave it alone. All the more for us."

After Ember's comment, Raleigh found herself taking hold of the small glass tube. Holding it to one nostril, she plugged the other and leaned forward, quickly inhaling two of the lines. Never had she imagined it would burn quite so badly. She immediately dropped the tube and started coughing, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Hey, you alright?"

"Yeah, I think so. Wow. I wasn't expecting that burn." As she wiped her nose and sniffled, Autumn rubbed her back.

"Don't worry, Raleigh. I think we all reacted the same way our first times."

"Speak for yourself." Ember muttered and Raleigh would have told her off had Effron not told her to shut the hell up. She just rolled her eyes and went back to sipping her daiquiri. Effron moved so his mouth was next to Raleigh's ear and she tried not to once again get lost in the feel of his hot breath on her ear, his voice, or the scent of his cologne.

"You want to go for a swim?"

"I don't have my suit."

"And your point is?" Raleigh didn't miss the playful glint in his eyes and she found his little smirk insanely adorable and she allowed him to pull her to her feet and lead her upstairs and to the backyard once again. They found that most of the partiers had dispersed. When they came to the pool, Raleigh could feel the effect of the drugs on her already. She couldn't quite explain how it made her feel. It was like being drunk with no inhibitions, no worries. She felt completely carefree as if she were floating on a cloud. It seemed to make her senses more sensitive. She was fully aware of every movement Effron made, every look he cast her way. It made it that much more difficult to push him away.

As she began to undress, more people came out to say good night to Effron and thank him for the invite. Pretty soon only Raleigh, Effron, Autumn, and Davey remained. While their friends were in the house doing god knows what, Effron watched as Raleigh swam through the glistening water. She may have been carefree at the moment but he knew it would wear off within the hour. Having been her first time, he knew she would come down hard, and he planned on being right there by her side to calm her down.

Effron had no idea what it was, but something about Raleigh drove him absolutely crazy. He had been with many women and has once even been the love ‘em and leave ‘em type, but she was different. He found himself not wanting to do anything while she was wasted because then it wouldn't mean anything to her. And for some reason he wanted it to mean everything.

"Hey." her soft voice brought him out of his thoughts and he looked up, seeing her swimming slowly towards him...naked.

Oh hell.

"Why don't you join me? I'm feeling a little lonely, and it was, after all, your idea." That was all it took for him to free himself of his shorts and jump into the pool with her. "So much better."

Raleigh swam a little closer to him and Effron couldn't tear his eyes from her lilac gaze. She allowed her hand to snake down his chiseled abdomen and slowly made her way around him, her hand circling his waist. Letting out a low groan, Effron rolled his head back slightly.

"What are you trying to do to me?"

Moving closer so her lips were at his ear, she whispered seductively, "Making you want me."

"You did that the first day we met." After that, no words were spoken. Raleigh snaked her tongue along his earlobe and without another thought, Effron spun around, his mouth devouring hers. How was it possible to want someone so badly? As Effron pushed Raleigh against the pool wall, she instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist. She could feel his excitement at her entrance and she began to shake with anticipation.

When it was over, Raleigh immediately jumped out of the pool and began to dry off and dress.

Not knowing exactly what to do for the first time in a long while, Effron did the same,. When he looked over at her, he noticed she was shaking. Either she was coming down from her high or she was crying. He hoped to god she wasn't crying. But she was.

"Was I that bad?" His ego had taken a major blow form her reaction and as badly as he didn't want to show it, it hurt that she was acting this way.

Not expecting the question, Raleigh could only stare at him for a moment before shaking his head. "No, you were incredible, Effron."

"Then what it is, love?" The care she saw in his eyes when he looked at her only made this that much harder. Could she really tell him? What they had just shared was great, she hadn't lied to him about that. But it still didn't change the truth at hand.

"I've never been with anyone but Josh." Raleigh shook her head and wiped away the tears. "I'm sorry. I have to go." Then she ran out of there, leaving Effron standing by the pool, only one question running through his mind.

"Who the bloody hell is Josh?"

"Hey, everything alright? Where‘s Raleigh?"

Effron's movements completely halted as he looked up to Autumn. He didn't even need to say anything, she already knew what happened.

"Who the hell is Josh?" Autumn pinched the bridge between her nose and closed her eyes, sighing loudly. "Is he her boyfriend?"

"No, Effron. They haven't been together in almost a year now."

"Well then what did I do that was wrong if she's not with anyone? Why did she run out of here freakin' crying?" It was so easy for Autumn to see the pain and outrage hidden in his eyes, as if his words weren't enough.

"Nothing, Effron. I'm going to go back and talk with her, see what is going on in that head of hers. I'll see you guys at class tomorrow."

Slamming the door shut as soon as she entered the dorm room, Autumn turned on the light and almost smiled when Raleigh bolted upright in her bed and squinted at her, her eyes fighting to adjust to the light.

"What the hell, Autumn?"

"I think I should be asking you that, Raleigh."

"What...?"

Crossing her arms, Autumn refused to back down. She was going to get answers from this girl no matter what it took. Effron had been her friend first and she knew he really liked Raleigh. She'd be damned if she was going to let her hurt him because of a guy on the other side of the country that she wasn't even dating anymore. "what happened between you and Effron?" Sighing, Raleigh closed her eyes and fell back to the bed. It was too late and she was to tired for this. "Answer me damn it! Effron is back at his house all pissed off because you ran off saying something about Josh. Look, I know you love him and plan on marrying him one day, but you‘re not together right now. Effron is here and now and he is a really great guy who likes you. There‘s no shame in having some unattached fun at the very least."

"I know that, Autumn,. The feeling of guilt just became too overwhelming. I've never been with anyone but josh."

Sitting on Raleigh's bed, Autumn rubbed her back. "I know you feel bad, but you haven't been dating for almost a year now. You deserve to have a good time while away at college. Besides, how do you know that Josh isn't at NYU doing the same thing?"

"You're right. I'll talk to Effron tomorrow."

"Good. Now I'm crashing."

Raleigh rolled away from Autumn on her side and she couldn't even get her eyes to close. She'd had a point. Was Raleigh really one hundred percent certain Josh wasn't in New York having some wild and crazy sex with any random girl, hopefully not Erin, and having the time of his life? It was, after all, his idea to wait to be together once again until they could actually be together. Maybe he wanted to have some unattached fun as well, not worrying about feelings for once.

No.

Raleigh couldn't believe that. Josh wouldn't lie or keep anything from her. They were past everything and now had a renewed sense of trust between them. So could she really sleep with Effron and do the occasional drug without it affecting her emotionally? Knowing she couldn't allow her love for Josh to control her life, Raleigh told herself she would only think of Josh in a friendly light and live for the moment "having fun."

With Effron.

---

Slowly coming out of her deep sleep, Raleigh groaned as she reached for the annoying beeping object. She wanted nothing more than to throw it against the wall and turn over and go back to sleep, but she couldn't. She had a session with her vocal coach in an hour and she refused to miss it.

Dragging herself out of the warm, comfy bed, Raleigh grabbed her toiletries and headed into the bathroom for a well needed shower.

After doing her hair and make up, Raleigh felt a new found confidence in herself. It was going to be a good day. Starting fresh never felt so good.

Knowing Effron had his lesson before her, she left a few minutes early, hoping to catch him before he headed to his next class.

As she waited in the hallway by the door, Raleigh listened as he sang something in French. It was beautiful. Effron could sing so well. She found herself wanting to sing with him for their final project of the semester.

Suddenly all sound stopped and she knew his time was up. The door opened and he seemed surprised to see her standing there, waiting for him.

"Raleigh, I wasn't expecting to see you today."

"Well, I have my lesson next. And I wanted to talk to you. You know, apologize for how I acted last night."

Nodding, he met her gaze. "Who is Josh? A boyfriend back home?"

"He's my childhood sweetheart. We were together from the time I was five until just after last Christmas. I felt like I was betraying him somehow, but then I remembered, he is at NYU doing who knows what and I am here free to do the same."

"Raleigh, you know I would never put you in a position to undermine your morals. And I won't make you do anything you don't want to."

Smiling up at him, Raleigh never wanted something so much. "I know. But we're just having fun, right?"

He smiled back at her and she could feel the butterflies forming in her belly. He began to walk backwards down the hallway and he raised his arms a little. "Just having fun."

Going into Mr. Cooper's studio, Raleigh felt the best that she had felt in a long time. She felt as though she could take on the world.

"Are you ready to begin, Ms. Coons?"

"Am I ever."

"Good. I have a new piece for you to work on. A bit more challenging." Placing a few sheets of paper on the stand before her, Mr. Cooper leaned down a bit, smiling at her. "If you master this as easily as the others I'm not sure what I'll do. I've never been in this situation before."

"Surely you have had a good student before, Mr. Cooper."

"Good, yes. Amazing?" He shook his head, his eyes never leaving her own. "Nowhere near as amazing as you."

"Well, that's too bad." She wasn't stupid. Raleigh was well aware of the fact that they were no longer speaking of the new piece. She was openly flirting with her professor and she was having a great time doing it. But what was really wrong with it? Mr. Cooper was only twenty four years old, making him the youngest professor in the college, and the most attractive one at that. He had these green eyes that just seemed to move right into your soul. His brown curls were grown out a bit and his tan skin was perfectly blemish free and clean shaven. He was positively gorgeous. Not to mention an incredible singer and teacher. Was it wrong to want to kiss him? "You have no idea what you've been missing."

"I think I'm well aware of what I've missed out on, Ms. Coons."

"Call me Raleigh."

"If only you call me Daniel."

"Gladly." She could feel his hot breath on her lips and it took everything in her to not lean forward those few inches and put her lips on his. She had to back up, get away from him.

Pulling away, Raleigh looked down at what she was given to work on today and smiled. It was Italian. She loved the Italian language. This was going to be no problem at all. Taking a deep breath, Raleigh belted out the song with perfection, hitting every note with precision and enunciation.

"I'm speechless."

"I thought the objective was to challenge me. That was the easiest piece you have given me yet. I think It's time to step away from the opera and give me something else or we're just going to have a problem."

Studying his student, Daniel nodded, agreeing with her. It was obvious she had mastered all opera types, but could she do Broadway?

"All right." Sitting at the piano, he began to play notes, flowing them all together to create a beautiful melody. "Do you recognize this song?"

It took a few moments for Raleigh to hear what the song actually was, but she had to smile at realizing he was playing "Goodbye Love" from Rent. "Yeah, that's from my favorite Broadway show of all time."

"Very good." Taking his hands off the keys, Daniel stood up once again, looking her square in the eye as if he were about to tell her a secret. "I'm getting a workshop together with a couple of the other professors. I have been put in charge of casting because they know I am the best at picking the best."

"Okay...so what does this have to do with me?"

"We need a Mimi. Someone who can act, sing and dance and not lose a note from moving around during "Out Tonight." I think that someone is you, Raleigh Coons."

Staring at him in shock, Raleigh had to have heard him wrong. "Performing in a Broadway show like Rent is a big deal, Daniel. I'm used to playing my own songs at my dad's café. There is no way I could pull off a huge role like Mimi Marquez and be compared to Rosario Dawson and Daphne Vega."

"You wanted to be challenged, Raleigh, I challenge you. And quite honestly you would make the best Mimi. We both know that. The professors and I have agreed on grading the students this semester by how well they perform in the final show. If you do well, which I am positive you will get rave reviews, I will be forced to give you an A plus. Doesn't that sound inviting?"

"That's bribery, Mr. Cooper."

"No, not when I can see it in your eyes that you're dying to play this role. Be honest with me, Ms. Coons, will you? This is a chance for you to be seen and heard and you know that. You won't pass it up for anything."

Raleigh couldn't do anything. She couldn't think, couldn't move, could barely speak. She knew he was right. This was the chance of a lifetime, a dream come true. Only an idiot would turn it down.

"You're right."

His breath taking smile shone all the way to his eyes. "Good. Opening night is November eighth and the final show is November eleventh. Two shows that day. Rehearsals start this Saturday at noon right here. Don't be late."

Raleigh couldn't believe her lesson was already over, but what had she really learned? She could already feel her nerves kick into overdrive and she hadn't even begun yet. "I won't." She turned to leave and just as she was reaching out to the door handle to pull it open, she turned back to her teacher. "Who is playing Roger?"

"Mr. Walker."

As she left the studio, Raleigh could only smile. This was something she had wanted and waited for, for eleven years now, and she finally got it. How was she going to pull this off?

She had to call Josh.

He would be so happy for her, but would he come to be there for her? She didn't know if she could do it without him there on opening night. Sure she had performed hundreds of times, but this was different and much bigger than anything she's ever done. Could she really play a role that two women had made so memorable and do it justice? This was all so overwhelming.

"Hello?"

"Hey Josh." Hearing his voice in that one word had already begun to make her feel comforted. She missed him so much. Why had they decided to go to school on opposite ends of the country?

"Hey beautiful! It's so good to hear your voice. I called you last night."

"I know. I was at a party my roommate made me go to."

"Oh, cool. Have fun?" There was something in the way he said that completely innocent question that made the guilt return once again.

"Yeah. I actually did have fun."

"That's good." There was a little bit of silence before she heard him sigh in the phone line. "I hate us being on opposite ends of the country. I miss you so much, Ray." And the guilt thickens.

"I miss you too, Josh. But we'll see each other soon."

"I know. I can't wait until Christmas."

"we might not have to wait that long. I have some exciting news to tell you and everyone back home."

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"A couple of the professors are putting together a workshop to be performed a few nights in November. I've been cast as Mimi Marquez." She could hardly contain her excitement as she told her former lover the exciting news.

"Rent? That's the workshop? You love that show, Ray. I'm so happy for you. And you can expect to me there opening night."

"Really? Oh Josh that would be perfect. I couldn't do it without you."

"Well, you won't have to worry about that. I'll be right there with you. But right now I have to go. Talk to you later?"

"Of course. Bye, Josh."

"I Love you, Raleigh." He said it so softly but it was full of truth, meaning and promise.

"I love you too, Josh, always."

Hanging up the phone, Josh tried not to let his feelings get the best of him. He really was happy for Raleigh. It was a great opportunity to really get her name out there and he didn't lie. He would be there opening night to support the love of his life. He just wished he wasn't feeling so guilty. He knew she could tell there was something different about him and he was surprised she hadn't asked. If she had Josh didn't think he had the heart to lie to her. But some things were better left unsaid. She would never forgive him if she ever found out what he had done. Sure they weren't dating at the moment but Raleigh couldn't stand Erin. He could hardly stand Erin himself. How could he have let that happen? The guilt he felt in his stomach for being weak was overwhelming. Oh well. They weren't together right now and haven't been in almost a year. This was nothing to be ashamed of. That was that.

Besides it would never happen again. He would make sure of it.

Entering the room, Raleigh was the center of attention. Only two other people were there already as she and Autumn walked in. Effron and Ember.

"Ladies, welcome. Take a seat. Airyk and David should be here soon." Mr. Cooper had been right. Just as Raleigh and Autumn had taken their seats on both sides of Effron, the aforementioned men waltzed into the room, choosing the other to remaining seats in the half circle.

"Alright, since everyone is here on time, with much surprise, lets begin. We'll start with ‘Seasons Of Love.'" After passing out the music and going on the piano, Mr. Cooper began the music and everyone joined in together and on key. Ember seemed to have a little trouble with her notes as she was playing Joann, but eventually she got it just right. After perfecting Seasons Of Love, Mr. Cooper suggested moving onto Effron and Raleigh's first duet, Light My Candle.

Raleigh found it a bit difficult not to get up and perform the piece as she would on stage, but she contain herself and got through it fully. However pleased with herself, her professor was not.

"Raleigh, I feel like you were holding yourself back. Why?"

She decided to go for honesty. "I've seen Rent live on stage at least a dozen times and the movie even more. It's hard for me to just sit in a chair and sing these songs to the best of my ability."

Seeming to contemplate her words, Mr. Cooper stood and went to the center of the room. "Alright, everyone please move your chairs back a few feet. If you're having trouble performing it while sitting still, then let's see how you perform it moving with Mr. Walker. Any objections, Mr. Walker?"

"No, none at all."

"Thought not." Going back to the piano, as soon as Mr. Cooper began, so did Raleigh and Effron.

Watching the chemistry between them as they performed, obviously getting the characters of Mimi and Roger down pact, everyone was in awe. Even Ember was speechless when the song was over, which was saying a lot considering how she didn't like Raleigh.

"All right, now that is what I'm talking about!" Mr. Cooper said as he clapped for their performance.

Trying not to dwell on them, Mr. Cooper began to have them do each song from the musical, in no particular order, so he could see where they all stood vocally. For some reason he found himself watching Raleigh most often. He found himself drawn to her, unable to break the trance he seemed to be in lately. There was no denying that within a month's time she had changed incredibly. When the semester had begun, she was a sweet, seemingly innocent, laid back country girl. But now...she was turning into Autumn more and more with each passing day. Her "fuck off" attitude really was doing a number on her. It was no secret that her new found gang of friends was into partying, alcohol, sex, and drugs so he knew she was doing it too.

Thinking back to his high school and college days, Mr. Cooper didn't feel anything at all that made him wish he were back there. The feeling of needing to fit in just overwhelms you. It breathes you in and swallows you whole, refusing to spit you back out. It begins to control your every move, every thought, every choice. He knew firsthand what the need to fit in does to someone and if he could, he was going to stop the same from happening to Raleigh. She was far too good of a person and far too talented to get mixed up in that lifestyle.

Within a few more weeks he began noticing little things about Raleigh. Small changes that made all the difference. She had missed two rehearsals, which everyone knew she would never do if she had still been the old Raleigh Coons. He had heard some of the other professors talking and apparently she had been missing classes as well. One even admitted she didn't know if Raleigh was going to cut it in the workshop. Her work was beginning to suffer.

Mr. Cooper knew there was really nothing he could do to change her behavior, but he'd be damned if he just let her throw her shot at the big time away for some sex and drugs.

It was two weeks until opening night and the stage was set. Everyone's footwork and all out performances were going great. Raleigh still had the "I'm untouchable" attitude but was still faltering. Missing the simplest steps during "Light My Candle" yet she somehow managed to get everything down on "Out Tonight" each time.

While Airyk and Ember were doing "The Tango Maureen," Daniel pulled Raleigh aside to speak candidly with her.

"Yeah?"

"What's up with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know exactly what I mean, Raleigh. You're missing classes and rehearsals and your performance is slipping. What is going on with you lately?"

"Nothing. I'm just sick of always playing it safe and never doing what I want when I want."

"Really? Well the other professors are ready to kick you out of this workshop. Is that what you want?"

Crossing her arms as if challenging him, Raleigh turned her face up slightly. "They won't kick me out."

"Oh, you sound so sure."

"There's only two weeks until opening night. Nowhere near enough time to train someone else to play Mimi."

"Raleigh, you were trained to play Mimi, but you've become her. And you should know as well as anyone that everybody has an understudy."

Watching him walk away from her, Raleigh felt something snap inside her. She had always taken pride in who she was as a person and a performer. Now that grip she held on both were slipping away. No, she wasn't proud of the fact that she did coke with her new friends regularly, but she wasn't so sure she could stop either. She was in no way an addict, she just enjoyed how she felt once getting to that high. Raleigh could only describe it as being on top of the world, like being invincible. But what it came down to was she's not invincible and she can be kicked out of the workshop and be even farther from reaching her dream. She had to cool it for a while,.

At least until the show was over anyway.

When rehearsal was over, Raleigh decided tog et a cab and do some shopping to make herself feel better. After buying practically an entirely new wardrobe, she decided to go to a Salon & Spa nearby. She got her fingernails and toenails done and then treated herself to a full waxing. It was painful, but the end result was well worth it. Thank god for the large allowance her father gave her each week so she didn't have to work.

Finally realizing what time it was, Raleigh found the first cab she could and hopped inside, telling the driver to get her back to the dorm as fast as possible. It was a little past eight and the Halloween part started at nine thirty. It would take all that time for her to get ready. She, Ember, and Autumn had all agreed to go as the original pussycat dolls clad in corsets, guarders and stiletto boots.

Finally getting her door open while juggling her bags, Raleigh rushed around the room collecting her toiletries so she could shower.

"Where have you been? We have to leave soon. Girl, don't even tell me you went and got pampered without me."

"Sorry Autumn but it was much needed. And I lost track of time."

"Well maybe you wouldn't have if you didn't turn your damn phone off."

"I'm sorry. I'll be quick I promise."

As promised, Raleigh was out of the shower and drying and straightening her hair in ten minutes.

"So what made you go off and sulk by yourself?" Autumn asked as she slipped on her boots.

"Nothing."

"Uh huh. This wouldn't have anything to do with Cooper pulling you out of rehearsal today would it?" Pausing for a second as she pinned back some of her hair creating a bit of a bump on top, Raleigh looked at Autumn through the mirror.

"I didn't know I was being watched. He just said my performance was slacking."

Laughing, Autumn shook her head in disbelief. "Ray, you can slack off and still be the best. You're the star of the show and he knows that. But no more talk about classes or rehearsal, we're going to have a good time tonight."

Smiling, Raleigh finished her make up and got dressed. She promised herself that after tonight she would give the show her all, but tonight? She was going to party and be the teenager she wanted to be with no inhibitions.

Pulling on her long, black satin coat, Raleigh tied it at her waist and looked at Autumn. "Let's go."

---

Wondering where Raleigh was, Effron took a look around the place once again. Where was she? They had agreed to meet at the party instead of going together but now he was beginning to regret that decision. Taking another gulp of his beer, Effron noticed people's attention going to the front door to his left. Slowly making his way over there, he realized why. Raleigh, Autumn, and Ember had finally arrived, walking in with attitude only they could pass off. His jaw had nearly hit the floor once his eyes came across Raleigh. Hand on her hip, hips swaying, hair being cast back as she moved. She looked absolutely stunning. Finally getting a hold of himself, Effron came towards the girls.

"Hello gorgeous." Smiling, Raleigh allowed him to kiss her.

"Hello yourself. You pull off the phantom look incredibly."

"It's a gift, what can I say? And you, my very own pussycat doll, are breathtaking." Kissing him again, Raleigh slowly turned to get herself a drink.

For a few hours they drank and danced and just had a great time before she felt Effron's mouth beside her ear.

"Wanna get out of here?" His husky accented voice made her want to rip off his costume and have him right there but she couldn't. She'd had other plans in mind for that night.

"I would love to, but there's something I have to do."

"Now?" The pout graced his features and Raleigh felt her heart melt. He was too adorable for his own good.

"Yes. But I'll meet you back at your place in an hour or two, ok?"

"I'm going to hold you to that." He whispered to her before crashing his lips on hers.

Breaking away from him before their heated hiss turned into more, Raleigh grabbed her coat and left the party, walking about six blocks over. Looking at her destination across the street, Raleigh mustered up the courage to actually go across and ring the doorbell. The man was obviously awake and alone, she could see him through his front window, so why the hesitation?

"Here goes." Taking hold of her new found "no day but today" attitude, Raleigh passed through the gate and went up onto the stone porch. After ringing the doorbell, she leaned back against the wall and waited. A minute later he answered, looking as gorgeous as ever.

"Raleigh." He said in surprise.

"Hello, Dan."

"It's nearly three AM, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you. You were up so I didn't think you'd mind the company." Looking at her, Daniel tried to figure out what she was up to.

"Get bored with your new found friends already?"

Rolling her eyes, Raleigh turned to leave. "Look, I got bored at the party and thought, "hmm, I wonder what Dan is doing? Maybe he's just as bored and lonely as me." But if you don't want me here I'll just go home and be bored by myself."

"All right, fine I'll bite. Come in." He opened the door and she stepped in past him.

"Wow." She said in astonishment. His home looked incredible on the outside, but the inside was even more beautiful. "You're home is amazing." It was decorated sort of dark to give it a middle ages look. Definitely a home fit for a king. "I wasn't aware that professors made so much money."

"We make more than teachers. Plus it helps that my parents left their entire fortune to me when they died. I grew up here and hadn't had the heart to sell it."

"Well, lucky you." She said as she moved into the room he had previously occupied. She had assumed it was the living room, but now that she was actually in it, she could see that it was actually a study. Three large, dark oak bookcases stood on the wall to the left of the door and a matching desk facing away from the wall perpendicular to that one. Across from where Dan had been sitting on the too comfortable looking couch was a large brick fireplace with an oil painting above the mantle. She assumed it was of Dan with his parents when he had been a child. Turning to the right corner, Raleigh felt her mouth drop at what she saw. A large grand piano sat there, calling out for her to play it. It was the exact piano she had always wanted.

Watching Raleigh critique his home, Daniel couldn't help but to wonder just what she wore beneath that coat. He held no doubt that it was something incredibly sexy, could he really expect anything less from her for a party? He noticed she suddenly seemed drawn to the piano and he suddenly could only picture her naked on top of it.

That was so wrong.

She was his student, that's all. He had to remain completely professional with her. If the dean even found out about him having even let her into his house he could lose his job. He loved teaching music. Nobody was worth sacrificing that for.

Ripping his eyes away form her, Daniel forced a sentence out of his mouth. "Was the costume party really that boring?"

Finally swinging around to face him, Raleigh replied, "Actually no. It was a lot fun"

"So then why did you leave it?"

"I wanted to speak with you." Daniel thought she had hesitated to answer him just a second too long.

"At three in the morning?" His voice held a hint of doubt and Raleigh swore to prove him wrong.

"Well, I had to do it before I lost the nerve to."

"Ok, what did you want to talk to me about?"

Shrugging, Raleigh simply said, "You were right."

"Was I now?" Raleigh nodded as Daniel slowly made his was toward her. "And just what had I been right about?"

"I came to LA to live my dream. Instead I became a partier who no longer does her best." Reaching into her pocket, Raleigh pulled out a photograph and handed it to him. "I've become her. That image that my mother always wanted me to portray. But at least that girl beneath the image took pride in her work and would never even entertain thoughts of doing things I have done since becoming friends with Autumn and everyone."

Looking down at the picture he held in his hand, Daniel couldn't believe this was the same girl who had come here at the beginning of the semester. This wasn't the quiet sweet country girl from Shelby Forrest, Tennessee. This was a girl who looked like a slut in her heavy make up and small black outfit that left very little to the imagination. But he'd be lying if he said the hint of a tattoo on her lower back hadn't stirred an immediate attraction in him.

"This looks more like you now."

"My mom wants me to become this huge popstar that everybody loves to look at. She thinks image is everything, and maybe today it is. But that's not me, that's not who I want to be. My music is the one thing I am proud of."

"As you should be. You're so talented, Ray. I'd hate to see you throw it all away."

"I'm not going to."

Watching as Raleigh ran her hand over the piano top, Daniel decided he wanted to get to know this girl more. What was really going on in that mind of hers? "Tell me something about you, Raleigh."

"I thought that's what I just did?"

"No. You just told me something about your mother. Tell me something about you, something real."

"Ok." Raleigh took a deep breath and looked at Daniel in all seriousness. "I hate peas."

"Raleigh, I want to know you. I want to know what makes you the person you are." Turning away from him, Raleigh sat on the stool and pressed her fingers to the keys, playing out a beautiful melody.

"Something real." He could see that she his a lot of pain away from the world and he ached to know everything that made her feel that pain. "I've been completely, madly in love with the same man for nearly thirteen years now. He broke my heart last Christmas with a simple letter he sent from NYU. Five weeks later I found out I was pregnant and I got an abortion. I didn't want him to resent me for getting pregnant. I wanted him to have a future. Then he came home for the summer and I tried as hard as I could not to get close to him again, but I couldn't help it. I mean, how could I just get over a twelve year relationship in five months? Then he found out what I had done and never in my life had I ever wished I could change something in my past as much as I did then." Smiling through the tears that were threatening to fall, Raleigh took a deep breath. "But he forgave me. After everything, he still forgave me." Stopping, Raleigh felt herself go back to that day the unimaginable happened. Josh had forgiven her and she had never been so happy.

"A-are you ok?" He stuttered a little, which made a crap-load of new thoughts run through Raleigh's mind. He only stuttered when he was really nervous or worried.

Wiping away the tears that stained her cheeks, Raleigh sniffled loudly before softly murmuring a "just fine."

"You don't look fine, Ray." Why now? Why did he have to be nice to her now? She didn't deserve it and was probably reading more into it than she should have, but it was killing her even more. He looked at her with such caring eyes and worry in his soft, beautiful voice. She couldn't take this much longer. She couldn't speak, she couldn't even think. So she shrugged in response.

"It's nothing." Her gaze was peered to the ground. She couldn't look at him anymore, for if she did, she would lose all control again.

"Ray, I know you. You don't cry over nothing. What happened?"

"Why are you doing this?" Her voice was soft and shaky. Couldn't he see that this was tearing her apart inside?

"Because, believe it or not, after everything that has happened, I do still care."

"You shouldn't." She whispered, wiping away the tear that had had the nerve to escape her red eye.

"Please, tell me what happened."

She shouldn't. She didn't want to. But dammit she needed to talk to someone or she was going to explode. He seemed willing to listen and he was the only one that needed to hear what she was dying to say. Letting out a deep breath, Raleigh simply said, "Mandy took us up to see the nursery." But that was all she needed to say. Josh knew why she had run out sobbing, he knew why didn't want to tell him.

"Oh." Was all he could say.

They were both silent for what seemed like hours but was only a few minutes. Josh couldn't stand it anymore. He had to know. "Why didn't you tell me? I would have come home to be with you."

Raleigh looked up at Josh and was certain she saw his eyes tearing up. This hurt him just as much as it hurt her. "I didn't want you to be with me only for a baby. I wanted you back, but I wasn't about to do that to you. You wanted to see what else was out there. You didn't want a girlfriend to hang over your head. So why should I dangle a baby there too?"

"But why did you go and..."

"Because I was scared!" She practically yelled at him. "I was scared of being a single mom, I was scared I would never get the chance to go to school and work on my music ever again. I was scared that you would come home and resent me for not letting you have a future. I was just so scared. I didn't' think you would ever find out. I wanted you to be happy with who ever you found up in New York."

"Well, that plan did a lot of good, don't you think?"

"God, I'm sorry Josh! Ok? I am so sorry I did that. I wanted so badly to hate you when you came home, but I couldn't. I let myself fall in love with you all over again and I knew I shouldn't have. Because if we got close again, you had a bigger chance at finding out. But I didn't care. You were here for three months and I thought maybe we could go back. God, I just....I love you, Josh. So much. I always have and I always will. You sending me that letter was like a fucking death call. I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe. I sheltered myself away from everyone. The only person I wanted was you. But I knew that wouldn't happen and when I found out I was pregnant, I had picked up the phone and a pen and paper so many times, but nothing ever seemed to come out right. So I gave up. I got scared and I did something unforgivable. And James was there and I was vulnerable and we ended up getting together. I think I wanted to prove to myself that the world doesn't end with you, but no matter how hard I tried, thoughts of you never left my mind. You were always right there with me. I never got over you. I never stopped loving you. The world may not have ended, but mine did. I'm just....I'm sorry. I am so sorry." Raleigh held onto herself tight and let the tears run down her face, let the sobs coming out of her throat.

"It's ok."

Raleigh looked at him in disbelief. "No it's not. I did something so horrible, how can you stand there and say you forgive me, that it's ok what I did to you? You can't."

"Too bad. Because I do." Raleigh looked up into his crystal blue eyes and found nothing that told her he was playing some sick joke on her. He was really forgiving her. How could he do that? Stepping closer to her, Josh put his hands on both sides of her face, causing her to look him in the face. "I love you, Raleigh Coons. Always and forever."

"I love you." Raleigh sobbed as she let him pull her face to his own. Their lips met in a passionate kiss. One that Raleigh never wanted to end. Their mouths fit perfectly with each other. The kiss she had waited for for so long had finally come and it was perfect. She still fit perfectly against him and she was so happy. She couldn't remember anytime in the past year that she had been so happy. Pulling away form the kiss so she could breathe, Raleigh wrapped her arms around Josh's neck and held on tight. There was no way she could let him go now. They had been through too much. This time, she was sure, they were going to make it.

Coming back to the present, Raleigh continued to play the keys before her. "We decided not to be together until we're done with school. It's what's best but it doesn't mean it hurts any less. I miss him so much I can barely speak to him on the phone without breaking down. Now I know why he had sent that letter."

Daniel heard the anguish in her voice and saw the pain written on her face. No wonder she had buried herself into the typical life of a college kid.

"You're only human, Raleigh. Everybody hurts, everybody feels." Daniel began to walk towards Raleigh, only one thing on his mind. The need to comfort her was overwhelming and he'd do anything to bring her that comfort. "Everybody needs." He dropped his voice to a whisper as he wrapped his arms around her waist, tugging on the tie of the coat she wore. As he slid the coast from her body, he put his mouth beside her ear, causing Raleigh's every thought and movement to slow dramatically as she closed her eyes. "and everybody wants." Pulling her hair to the side, he removed her choker and kissed her neck softly.

A few seconds ago Raleigh had been upset and missing everyone back home. Now all she wanted was Daniel. The way his lips felt on her neck, his touch creeping up her thigh, it was all driving her completely mad.

Turning on the stool, Raleigh pulled his head down to hers, crushing their lips together. She felt him lift her up with ease and place her on the piano. Releasing her arms from around his neck, Raleigh moved her hands down to undo his pants and take his shirt off. She raked her fingers down his chest and to his hips, pulling him ever closer to her.

Reaching around her, Daniel unclasped her corset and threw it off into the room somewhere. As they continued their heated kiss, he lifted her once again and headed upstairs to his bedroom, kicking off his jeans in the process.

How could something so wrong feel so incredible?

Silk sheets? She didn't have silk sheets at the dorm...neither did Effron. Slowly opening her eyes to take in her surroundings, Raleigh decided she hadn't felt so disoriented in a long time as she did at that moment. Last night had been the Halloween party and she could only remember being hopped up on coke and alcohol. Looking around the larger bedroom, her eyes landed on a picture sitting on the nightstand. It was an older photo of Daniel and a women who seemed to be of the same age and who could easily be his sister. In fact, the resemblance was so great, they could even pass for twins.

"I thought he's an only child?" She said aloud to the empty room.

Setting down the frame, Raleigh decided she'd ask him about it later. Noticing that her clothes, or lack thereof, weren't in the room with her. Grabbing the blue shirt Daniel had thrown on the chair, Raleigh threw it on and made her way downstairs and into the kitchen where Daniel was cooking breakfast. She tried not to laugh as she watched him bop his head and sing along to the radio. Hearing him try to reach the high notes of the song was just too much.

"REO Speedwagon?" Seeing the startled expression on his face caused her to burst out laughing.

"Damn straight, REO. You have any objections?"

"No, not at all. I just wasn't aware that men liked them too."

"Well, lucky for you I'm comfortable enough in my sexuality to admit that I like some heart felt music." He said, wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing her lightly on the lips. "Good morning, beautiful."

"Good morning." And good is just what it was.

"I hope you're hungry. How did you sleep?" Pulling away from her, Daniel went back to cooking the bacon and cracked a few eggs into the frying pan.

"Much better than I have in a long time. Why didn't you wake me up?"

"I wanted to surprise you but you got to me first and ruined it." He gave her a playful smile before looking back to the cooking eggs. "How do you like your eggs?"

"Sunny side up. Anything I can do?"

"Just sit there and look pretty."

He cast another smile her way and Raleigh found that it was contagious. .

As she watched him work around the kitchen, she found her mind wandering. She hadn't felt this happy and comfortable with a man in a long time, not since Josh. Daniel reminded her of him in so many ways. He could see right through the façade she put on and he knew when she was lying. Just one look into his deep eyes had shown her how much he actually cared for her and everything he'd do if it meant she wouldn't be swallowed by the influence of her peers.

After eating the large breakfast, Raleigh had to admit it was the best home cooked meal she'd ever eaten.

"So you can sing, act, dance and cook. Is there anything you can't do, Mr. Cooper?" Meeting her gaze, he offered her a sly grin.

"Not much." Feeling herself redden, Raleigh took the last sip of juice from her glass and stood, helping him with the dishes, damning herself the entire time. Why was it so easy to be herself around him? Why did he have to be so charming and romantic?

Why did he have to remind her so much of Josh?

Her head screamed for her to get out, to not get attached to him. He was her professor, not Josh. She knew she would never be able to begin a real relationship with Daniel. After all, it would be a lie. She could never do that to him, he deserved so much better than that.

After finding all of her costume and Jacket, Raleigh quickly got dressed and headed to the front door to leave. As soon as her hand hit the door handle, Daniel caught her and pulled her into his arms, catching her lips with his own. Before she could think, her arms went around his neck, pulling him into her. She could feel his excitement pushing against her belly and it made her really not want to leave.

He felt Raleigh's hand massage him through his pants and he groaned into her mouth. Pulling away, Daniel leaned his head against Raleigh's shoulder as she removed him from the confining pants.

"I really should go." She breathed into his ear.

His only reply was pulling down her bottoms and pushing her up against the nearest wall. Crashing his mouth with hers once again, he wrapped her legs around his waist, forcing himself to enter her slowly, savoring every moment.

"Oh god..." Raleigh gasped for air as she moved her hips in rhythm with his.

Hearing her cries of pleasure and passion, Daniel couldn't hold back any longer. Within a few more thrusts he brought them both to their breaking point. It was so powerful he had to lean them against the wall to keep himself from falling over.

Trying to catch her breath, Raleigh couldn't keep herself from smiling. That was the roughest, best sex she'd ever experienced. Trying to focus, Raleigh listened to Daniel's voice.

"I have some things to do today, but can you come back tonight?"

Putting her feet back on the floor, Raleigh reached for her panties and slipped them back on.

"I promised Effron I'd go to dinner with him tonight. But I can come later." Hell, who in their right mind could refuse another chance at that?

Tying her coat at the waist once again, she kissed Daniel once more and left, walking the few blocks to the dormitory. Pulling out her cell phone, she turned it back on and was surprised to see that she had five new voicemails and six text messages. A few from Autumn, even more from Effron. But the last message was from Josh and as soon as his voice floated through her ear, the guilt began to well into the pit of her stomach once again. She could feel the tears stinging her eyes but she blinked them away.

"Hey baby, it's me. Just wanted to call and see how everything's going. I was thinking about you and how I can't wait to be out of school so you and I can be together again." Raleigh heard him say something to someone in the room before he spoke into the phone once more. "Well, I have to get going but call me back. I want to hear your voice. So two, three in the morning, whatever. I love you, Ray." There was a short silence before she heard the phone click off. Pressing "9" on the key pad, Raleigh saved the message as she entered the building and went up to her dorm. Just as she had expected, Autumn was waiting there, freaking out as soon as she saw Raleigh come in.

"Where the hell have you been, Ray? You told Effron you were going for a walk at three in the morning ion LA! And then neither of us hear from you and you're phone was off all damn night to top it off. Are you trying to scare the hell out of us all? Where did you go?"

"I'm sorry, Autumn. I forgot I had my phone turned off."

"So? Where have you been all night?" Turning to grab some clothes out of her dresser, Raleigh tried her best to sound casual.

"I just went to a friend's house and we had a couple drinks and I ended up passing out on the couch during a movie. No big deal."

Tilting her head to the side, Autumn put her hands on her hips and gave Raleigh a look that screamed "bullshit."

"What?"

"Nothing. If you wanna lie to me about going to another guy's house, that's your business." Staring at Autumn, she felt her stomach drop to her knees.

"What makes you think I was at another guy's place?"

"Oh come on, Ray!" Autumn laughed, putting her hands on Raleigh's shoulders. "You're glowing the only way a woman does after a night of hot sex." Backing off a little, Autumn smiled at her friend who was obviously torn. "Don't worry. I won't tell Eff."

Before she could form another word, the dorm phone began to ring and Autumn picked it up.

"Hello? Hey Effron...don't worry, she just got back. Hang on a sec." Handing the phone over to Raleigh, Autumn plopped down on her bed and flipped through a magazine.

"Hey Effron."

"Ray, where have you been? You said you were going to meet me at my house but you never showed and you're phone was off. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, really. I just went to visit a friend and ended up falling asleep. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. I was just worried. We still on for dinner tonight?"

"Of course."

"Great. I'll pick you up at seven."

"Sounds good. See you then." Setting down the phone, Raleigh could only say one thing. "I'm a whore."

Looking up at her in surprise, Autumn raised an eyebrow. "No you're not. You're a teenager with a healthy sex drive. Nothing whorish about that."

Shaking her head, Raleigh sat down on her bed and unzipped her boots. AS she was pulling them off she could feel Autumn's eyes boring into her skull.

"What, Autumn? It's obvious you're dying to ask so just ask already."

"I don't need to ask you who you were with. I already know." Autumn smirked at her before leaning back on her elbows.

"Oh really? And just who is that?"

"Come on, Raleigh. I'd have to be blind and retarded not to notice the tension between you and Mr. Cooper."

"Mr. Cooper? You think that's who I was with all night?"

"I don't think, I know. Just tell me, I'm right aren't I?" Raleigh's silence as she fiddled with her blanket was enough of an answer for Autumn. "Oh get on with your bad self, girl." Raleigh tried not to turn ten shades of crimson as she looked at Autumn who was smiling like a giddy school girl who just met the hottest man alive and he showed her interest.

"Ok, so I was with Mr. Cooper last night. But you can't tell anyone! I don't want him to get into trouble, he loves teaching too much."

"Raleigh, relax. I promise you I won't say anything. You're my friend, I couldn't betray you like that."

"Thank you, Autumn." She didn't miss the smile that still appeared on her lips as she continued to look at her. "what now?"

"How good was he?"

"Oh my God, Autumn!" Raleigh put her face in her hands as she tried to calm her laughter.

"That good, huh?"

"I'm getting in the shower now." Raleigh stood up and grabbed her things, trying not to look at her roommate anymore.

"Oh come on, Ray. Just tell me. Please?" Autumn pleaded with her, enjoying the embarrassing torture she was putting her through.

Stopping at the bathroom door, Raleigh turned her head to look at Autumn as a smile played on her lips. "He's the best I've ever had."

"You go girl." Autumn said, laughing as she turned on her TV, surfing through the channels for anything worth watching.

After Raleigh's shower, she and Autumn just lounged around until six o'clock when Raleigh decided to get ready for her dinner with Effron. Going to the closet, Raleigh grabbed her black fitted dress that fell just above the knee with silk pink around the bust line and a tiny pink bow at the center of the top. After applying some make up, she straightened her hair. She pulled some tight around her head beneath her hair to give it a head band look. Her bangs were slanted to the right, covering most of her right eye.

As she was pulling on her slinky dress, she heard a knock on the door. "That's probably Eff. Can you get it, Autumn?" As she was zipping up her dress, Effron walked in, whistling lowly.

"Damn girl, you are looking pretty fine." Slipping on her black pumps, Raleigh gave Effron a quick kiss.

"Thank you. You look pretty hot yourself." After grabbing her purse, they said a quick goodbye to Autumn and left, leaving the building and going to his car. Once they got to the restaurant Raleigh was impressed with the way he had apparently planned out everything. It was nice, fancy Italian dining and the music made Raleigh feel as though she were in Italy, experience it as true Italians do.

As they sat in the restaurant waiting for their dinner to arrive, Effron filled the silence. What he had been talking about, Raleigh couldn't be sure. She was in her own little world, immersing herself with her thoughts. Seeing and being with Daniel were the only things she could think of. She was completely infatuated with him, almost as if her had bewitched her.

Raleigh didn't like the feeling of being vulnerable they way she felt when with him, but the need to be with him was far greater. She hadn't gone to his home without thinking what could happen, but she hadn't expected it. She had only planned on telling him what was on her mind and leaving, going back to Effron's. but now...now all she wanted was to get away from Effron and get back to Daniel's. He made her remember home, where she had come from and who she used to be. The want to fit in and not be in pain from missing all her friends was just so strong. She had begun to ignore calls from home because it had been too hard. But tomorrow she was going to call Carly and have the girl talk only they could have.

"I guess I just miss Australia." Looking at Raleigh, Effron realized she wasn't listening to him, she was just staring at her glass, a far off look in her eyes. "Raleigh have you listened to one word I've said?"

Ripping from her enveloping thoughts, Raleigh realized Effron was speaking to her. "Of course I have."

"Right, then what was I talking about?"

Raleigh him a blank look before smiling defeat. "I'm sorry, I guess I was dazing. What were you saying?"

"Ray, who were you with last night?"

"I told you, I went to hang out with a friend."

"Was it another guy?" Staring at Effron, Raleigh laughed incredulously.

"No, Eff, it wasn't another guy. And even if it had been, what would it matter? You and I aren't dating." Looking into his eyes, it was obvious she had struck a nerve. His jaw was clenched shut and he swallowed at least three times as he stared at her. Finally looking away, he sighed quietly.

"You're right, I'm sorry, Ray."

"Hey it's flattering that you're jealous."

"I can't help it. You're a great girl." Raleigh smiled as she felt her cheeks redden.

After leaving the restaurant, they went for a little walk in the park before Effron took her back to the dorm. Standing at the door, Effron leaned in and kissed her lightly on the lips before slightly pushing into her, causing them both to back into the door.

Breaking away, Effron rested his forehead against hers. "I want you so bad right now. Sure you don't want to come over?"

"Yeah, I'm just going to go to bed, catch up on some sleep." It's funny, for a girl who never lied, it came pretty easily to her.

"All right." Kissing her once more, Effron backed away. "I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight."

"Night." Raleigh watched him walk back down to the elevators before going into her room. Much to her surprise Autumn was asleep. Quickly and quietly she maneuvered around the room, packing a small overnight duffel bag. Looking out the window, Raleigh made sure Effron was gone before slipping back out into the hallway saying a soft "good night" to Autumn.

Once she got to Daniel's house, she rang the doorbell and waited about fifteen seconds before the door was swung open and Daniel had her in his arms, pushing her against the now closed front door, kissing her as if he'd never get the chance again.

Calming down some, he pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. "I didn't mean to attack you, I've just been waiting for that since you left earlier."

"By all means, attack away." She smirked looking him in the eyes before leaning up to kiss him again, this time much softer.

"How was your dinner?"

"Not dinner. Couldn't eat with Effron staring at me the whole time."

"Oh, so you must be hungry."

"I could definitely eat more of your cooking." Raleigh winked at him before making her way to the kitchen, but he grabbed her arm, swinging her around so she was back in his arms.

"I don't think so. You go make yourself at home, and I'll make us dinner."

"Fine. Just call me when you're ready." Running her hand around his waist as she walked by him, Raleigh changed course to the study where the grand piano sat, just waiting to be played.

As she sat on the stool with her fingers hovering lightly over the keys, she was brought back to the first day she had ever sat at a piano. Josh had taught her to play when they were seven years old. Raleigh's father had just opened the café so they weren't so financially secure as they were now. Raleigh had wanted piano lessons more than anything but they couldn't afford them, so Josh had offered to teach her and of course she had accepted.

Closing her eyes, Raleigh began to play the first song Josh had taught her to play. She could remember everything about that day. What the weather was like, what they had been doing when he'd offered the lessons, how he had smelled, how his body had felt pushed up against her back. She could even remember things he had said while his hands were on her.

Sighing, Raleigh threw her hands up in frustration.

"This is stupid and a waste of time. I'm never going to get this."

"Ray, it's easy, look..." Sitting on the bench beside her, Josh set his fingers on the keys and played the song once again, much more slowly so Raleigh could watch.

"Josh..." She whined, hunching over, shaking her head. "It's easy for you because you've been playing for four years. I've never even sat at a piano before today."

"Raleigh, I'm here because you wanted to learn. But if you don't let yourself, this is pointless." Staring into her lilac eyes, Josh knew he could never give up on her. The piano was a difficult instrument to learn, but Raleigh was stubborn.

As was he.

"Close your eyes." Standing up, Josh moved to sit directly behind her. Sitting on the bench with a leg on either side of her, Josh said it again when she looked at him curiously, asking why. Moving her hair to the left side of her neck, Josh whispered into her ear. "Just trust me."

And she had completely. Raleigh closed her eyes and tried to ignore the sensations flying through her body she'd never known before. Sensations a seven year should not have been feeling.

Breathing in slowly, all of her senses were sent into overdrive as she felt him push against her back, his hand covering hers on the keys. When he rested his chin on her shoulder, Raleigh felt herself relax into him. He pressed down on her thumb then her forefinger, going through each note slowly until she picked up the rhythm. Before she knew it, Josh's hand was gone and she was playing on her own, eyes remaining closed.

Smiling, Raleigh tried not to stop playing when she felt Josh's fingers on her bare side, rubbing back and forth trying to tickle her. She could feel his smile as he leaned his face into her neck.

"How do you expect me to keep playing when you're doing that?"

"Work through the distraction."

Taking her hands off the keys finally, Raleigh turned as fast and as far as she could without falling off the bench and attacked him back which inevitably caused them both to go tumbling to the floor.

Raleigh had landed on top of him and she felt herself stop dead, just staring into his blue eyes. Josh reached his hand up and pushed her hair back behind her ear. Most boys were playing G.I. Joes or teasing girls, but he was thinking about Raleigh in a completely different way. He wasn't even nine yet and all he wanted to do was kiss her. He'd never kissed anyone before.

What would it be like?

Before either of them could find out Karen had come into the room with a camera and a plate of cookies causing both of the kids to jump up as fast as they could.

They had been so young then. It had only been ten years ago but it felt like a whole other lifetime. Raleigh smiled as she remembered how embarrassed she and Josh had been when his mother just looked between the two of them, hands planted firmly on her hips. They'd thought she'd never leave them alone together again.

Continuing to play, Raleigh could feel Dan's watchful eyes on her. Her memory reminded her of how happy she'd been back then. She'd give anything to have that back. She felt him move and soon after, heard his voice.

"So, I forgot I still have to go shopping so I ordered a pizza. Hope you like pepperoni."

Raleigh didn't look at him, she only smiled a little as she continued with the melody.

"I haven't seen anyone concentrate that hard on chopsticks in a long time. Penny for your thoughts?"

"Not so sure they're worth that much."

"I'd pay it."

"Just thinking about how I wish I could be home with everyone again, if only for my birthday."

"Ah, right. You have yet to turn eighteen." There was a slight pause and Raleigh knew what he was now thinking. "Well now I feel like a pervert. Hadn't actually really thought about your age."

"Are you afraid I might turn you in?"

"I'm hoping you won't."

Turning, Raleigh ran her hand slowly up his thigh, getting that playful glint in her eye.

"If it makes you more comfortable, we can just hang out for the next week and a half."

Swallowing the want he now felt thundering through his veins, Dan nodded his head. "I think I could last a week."

"Yeah?" Standing up, Raleigh allowed her hands to go up under his shirt and around to his lower back. Pulling him into her she ran her tongue lightly along his neck and up to his ear, eliciting a low groan from him. "I want you so bad right now, Daniel." As soon as she felt him grow harder she pulled back and turned away from him. "But I can wait."

She had only gotten about two steps before he grabbed her arm and pulled her into him, their mouths meeting in a heated kiss as they scrambled to get out of their clothes.

Morale be damned.

Lord how she wished she could just have his arms wrapped around her, if only for a moment. She needed his laughter, his voice... his touch again. She'd give anything for him to be here with her.

Carly had called her earlier in the day to wish her a happy eighteenth birthday and she had cried, pouring everything out to her. She needed her best friend back.

I can't do this.

She'd become a fake and she knew it. Being with Daniel had made her see so many things about the person she'd become. But Carly had simply told her to take a deep breath and calm down, before really speaking her mind. Raleigh knew she had told Carly everything because she was the one person she could really count on to tell her the truth and not sugar coat anything. The words she had spoken only two hours earlier were still ringing through her mind.

"Are you completely insane, Ray? How could you have even thought about doing any type of drug? Do you want to become an addict and completely ruin whatever shot you have right now? And Please don‘t even get me started on the whole Dan/Effron thing." Raleigh tried not to let more tears fall as she listened to her friend's tirade. "Josh is at NYU on the other side of the country and there is no doubt in my mind he's being faithful to you. I know you two aren't together right now, but seriously. How could you being screwing around with two different guys? One being your professor no less!"

"Carly, I know all this! You don't think I feel bad and guilty enough?"

"Raleigh, I'm not trying to make you feel bad, I just can't believe that you would do something like this. That's not the Ray we all know."

Wiping away her tears, Raleigh pulled her legs up to her chest, wrapping her free arm around them. "I know. I have to end it with both of them. I just needed something to take the pain away. I've never been away from home, away from you. I couldn't stand thinking about it all the time anymore. The drugs allowed me to separate myself from my old world."

"Is that really what you wanted? To forget about everyone who really cares about you? Ray, you know whenever you miss one of us, we're always just a phone call away. I know its not as great as being in person but it sure beats drowning yourself in drugs, booze and sex."

"I know. I'm so sorry for who I've become. I just want to go home."

"I won't let you. Just remember, at the end of the week you will be up on that stage doing your thing and you'll be happy. You'll get that natural high that performing has always given you and you'll remember that you're in LA for a purpose, and you are going to make it. We all have faith in you."

"I love you, Carly."

"I love you too girl. I wish I could be there for you birthday and the show, but I can't be. But you should be getting your present later on today from all of us here. Should have a big "We love you, Good Luck" on it." Carly laughed and Raleigh smiled. She really was the best friend she could have ever asked for.

"Well, as much as I hate to say it, I have to go get ready. Everyone wants to take me out for lunch and maybe go to the beach later on. I just want to sit in my room and wallow in self pity but they won't have it."

"I'm starting to like them now. You deserve to have fun on your birthday, just not too much fun."

"I know. Bye Carly. I'll call you whenever I get this present in and thank you all."

"Alright, bye girl."

They had hung up and Raleigh had cried even more throughout her shower. When everyone had shown up at the dorm and did a line, Raleigh had been entirely too tempted to take one herself, but she couldn't. She had to deal with the homesickness in a healthy way. Plus too she hadn't wanted to go to the beach high off her ass.

Effron had his arm draped around her as they sat on the sand in a circle, telling stories of past birthdays and she could only think of Josh. He had always been there with some sort of gift for her. Except for last year though. He had gone off to college and hadn't been able to come home. But he still managed to make her love him even more with a bouquet of tulips and a song he had made just for her.

God how I wish he could be here right now.

Feeling Autumn nudge her, Raleigh pulled out of her thoughts and looked at her. "what?"

"There's a hottie over there checking you out. I don't even know how long he's been standing there."

Rolling her eyes, Raleigh wasn't even going to bother looking in the direction Autumn had nodded, but inevitably her curiosity got the best of her. Feeling as though the world had suddenly gone into slow motion, she turned her head and felt her heart leap into her throat as her lilac eyes landed on the man standing there, gazing intently at her.

His hair was a little longer now, blowing in the wind and Raleigh felt herself shiver at how gorgeous he had looked.

Oh my god...

Jumping up as fast as she could, Raleigh immediately ran full speed at the man and jumped into his arms, hugging him to her tightly, not even caring if she had hurt him at all.

"Oh my God, you're here..." Moving her head back a little, Raleigh looked into his beautiful blue eyes that she hadn't been able to look into in far too long. Disregarding all the eyes she felt on her at that moment, Raleigh leaned her head down and kissed him with everything she had in her. She felt his arms tighten that had been wrapped around her waist holding her up and he responded fully to the kiss. She knew he had missed her just as much as she had missed him.

Watching Raleigh jump to and kiss another man had made Effron feel a burning within him right down to his core. He wanted nothing more than to jump up and punch this guy in the face.

"Who the hell is that?"

Autumn opened her mouth then closed it once again, completely at a loss for words at how Raleigh had just jumped on the stranger. But he wasn't a stranger at all to her.

"I'm thinking that's the infamous Josh."

"I figured."

"Boy if looks could kill, he'd be dead right now. Don't let Raleigh see you look at him like that."

Putting on his sunglasses, Effron tried to hide his emotion a little better so she wouldn't get upset with him.

After all, they were just having fun right? No reason for him to get so jealous.

Letting her legs fall from Josh's hold, Raleigh broke their kiss and hugged him tightly once more as if she were afraid he would disappear if she let him go.

"Ray, I think you can let me go. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Not for the next ten days anyway."

Finally releasing him, Raleigh bit her trembling lip. "I just can't believe you're actually here."

"Did you honestly think I'd miss another one of your birthdays?"

Raleigh could only shake her head, afraid her voice would fail her if she tried to speak. She ran her fingers through his longer hair, admiring his curls. "You finally grew your hair out. I like it."

"It's all for you." A smile planted firmly on her lips, Raleigh realized she had been there with her new friends.

"Oh! I feel so rude." Taking his hand in hers, she led him over to the group which eyed him curiously. "Josh this is Ember, Airyk, Davey, Autumn, and Effron. Everyone, this is Josh."

"It's nice to meet ya'll."

"Wow you guys really are from the south." Ember chuckled to herself.

"Don't mind her, she's a bitch. It's really nice to meet you finally. Raleigh talks about you all the time." Autumn said, immediately welcoming him into their group.

"Only the good I hope." He laughed uneasily as he gripped her hand tighter.

"Don't worry, Josh. She's made you out to be a perfect guy."

"Great." Raleigh laughed at his sarcasm and pulled him down to sit. She wasted no time in snuggling up against him and he immediately wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him. There in his arms was where she belonged, where she wanted to be.

She was done with Daniel and Effron as of now.

Throughout the remainder of the night the group had played Frisbee, made s'mores, and listened to Josh and Raleigh's stories about their years together. Raleigh knew Effron had been tuning them out nearly the entire night, shooting daggers through his eyes whenever he looked at Josh and she was getting fed up with him. He had absolutely no right to be this way. They‘d had agreed once this had gotten started that they were nothing more than friends with benefits. They weren't dating, nor would they ever be.

The group had begun to dissipate around eleven and Raleigh found herself nodding off under the warmth of the blanket and fire. She couldn't help it though, she had felt the most comfortable laying in his arms. How was it possible to miss and love someone so much?

Raleigh felt Josh's mouth beside her ear and she left her eyes closed as she smiled. "Hey, you falling asleep on me?"

"Not at all."

"Liar." He planted a soft kiss on her cheek before pushing her forward a little, eliciting a groan from her. "Come on, get up."

"Why? I was so comfy."

"Because, you're tired and I am so jet lagged. I should take you back to your dorm now."

Standing up, Raleigh put her arms around his waist after grabbing her bag and leaned into him as they walked on. "I don't think so. You just got here, I'm not leaving your side until I absolutely have to."

"So what? You're just going to stay at the hotel with me?"

Pulling away from him, Raleigh crossed her arms as she walked on. "Well if you don't want me to..."

"No, no!" He grabbed her arm and held her to him. "I most definitely want you to stay with me."

"Good." She kissed him lightly before they continued to walk on to the rental car he had gotten. Once inside, Raleigh found she couldn't rip her eyes from him. He was absolutely gorgeous and right in front of her.

Who knew wishes could come true?

Taking her hand in his, he brought it to his mouth and planted a kiss on it as his eyes remained on the road in front of him. "Happy birthday, Raleigh Jean."

"I love you, Joshua Scott. And this was by far the best one yet. Thank you."

"Thank everyone back home. They got me here."

"I'm going to have to call them tomorrow after my classes." Finally pulling into the hotel's parking lot, Josh grabbed her bag and together they walked up to his room. Raleigh couldn't wait to curl up in bed with the man she had always loved. There was nothing like sleeping in the arms of the man who holds your heart.

Once they were behind the door, Josh wasted no time in pulling her to him and kissing her the way he had been wanting to all night. He unzipped her white hoodie and threw it off into the room somewhere forgotten. Raleigh pulled away and Josh let out a low groan.

"I'm sticky, salty, and sandy. I need a shower." Stopping at the entrance to the bathroom, Josh watched as she dropped her white skirt to the floor and looked back at him. "Care to join me?"

She didn't have to ask twice.

----

During her Music Theatre class, Raleigh found it incredibly difficult to pay attention. Her mind kept wandering throughout the entire lesson to Josh and how she couldn't believe he was actually there, in LA. She knew she had been smiling like a fool through the whole class and she could feel Dan's eyes on her through most of it. He had been probably trying to figure out what she had to smile so much about.

That or he was thinking she was a lunatic.

"Ok, our time is up for today but I want everyone to practice this piece and learn what each and every note is. See you tomorrow." Standing up, Raleigh collected her papers and books as fast as she possibly could. Music Theatre was her last class of the day and she wanted nothing more than to go and spend the rest of the night with Josh.

"Raleigh, may I speak with you for a moment?"

Damn.

She had almost been home free. "Of course, Mr. Cooper. What's up?"

Her last classmate had just left and she watched as Dan slowly walked to the door and closed it. Turning around, he looked at her curiously before walking back to where she had been standing. Sitting on his desk, Dan reached into the top drawer and pulled out a pink envelope.

"Happy Birthday, Raleigh."

"Thank you, Dan." Like a little girl, Raleigh smiled and tore open the card, smiling as she read its words. "Oh, you have a gift for me, huh?"

"I do. Couldn't really bring it here though."

"Dan, you didn't have to get me anything. But thank you."

"You're more than welcome." Leaning forward, Dan met her mouth with his and Raleigh immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. After a moment, Raleigh pulled away, realizing what she was doing. "Hey, you ok?"

"Uh, yeah. I'm fine. I just..."

"What is it?"

"Josh is here, in LA." The surprise was evident on his face as he backed away from her a little more.

"Oh." Looking into his eyes, Raleigh couldn't read his emotion there. Was he upset? Relieved? Disappointed?

"Yeah, he came in last night for my birthday and he's leaving the Wednesday morning after the show."

"So that's what you were smiling about all during class. Your meant to be is here."

"Yes. So I would feel a lot better if we, if you and I didn't..."

"Raleigh." He silenced her with a hand placed gently on her cheek. "It's fine. I completely understand."

"Thank you." Raleigh kissed him on the cheek then turned away, grabbing her books before leaving the classroom, Dan watching after her.

After leaving the classroom, Raleigh had only made it around the corner before Effron was behind her.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"I'm going to meet Josh for lunch then we're just going to hang out, why what's up?" She saw the fire burn in his eyes the moment Josh's name had left her lips but she had chosen to ignore it for the time being.

"Well, tomorrow we're going to be in dress rehearsal all night and then the next is opening night. We were all going to go out to dinner, maybe invite the instructors, take them out for getting the workshop together."

"Oh, well that's a sweet idea. But I think I'm going to have to pass. I just want as much alone time with Josh as I can get before he has to go back to New York. You understand, right?"

"Yeah, of course I do." No he didn't. Not at all. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow."

Effron watched as Raleigh left the building and ran down the stairs to jump into the arms of Josh once again. The boy seemed to be everywhere. He hated it but at the same time he couldn't blame him. If it had been him who had grown up with her and had loved her all his life, he'd be doing the same exact thing.

But that didn't mean it didn't piss him off any less.

When this had all started, Effron knew it was just to have some fun. To be their careless teenage selves. But somewhere along the line he had begun to care about Raleigh, so seeing her there, in the arms of another man...it tore him apart inside.

---

As Josh helped Raleigh into his rented Chevy Impala, he could feel Effron's eyes on him. Josh wasn't stupid, he knew there were some hidden feelings there and he couldn't blame the guy for them. He knew Raleigh better than anyone and he knew she could be a tease, sometimes unintentionally. But the way Effron looked at him, it were as though he was trying to re-aquire what belonged to him. As if he was marking his territory with the daggers he shot his way.

Ray wouldn't be with him.....would she?

No. She was his and he was hers, that's how it had always been and that is how it always would be. They belonged together. In the words of everyone back home, Raleigh and Josh were Ross and Rachel. They just fit. But lately it had seemed like something was off with them...with her. Raleigh suddenly wasn't as close with him as she had once been. She didn't call him as often as she did when school had first started

Is something going on I don't know about?

No. She had been so excited to see him last night at the beach. If she didn't want to be with him anymore, she wouldn't have acted that way when she saw him.

"So where are we going?" Her voice breaks his thoughts and he can insantly feel himself relax when he sees her relaxed form in the passenger seat. Her head was back against the head rest, her body was turned toward him slightly, and her leg was up on the seat. He felt himself smile as he gazed into her lilac eyes.

"Is there anywhere in particular you wanted to go?"

"As long as I'm with you, I really don't care where we are."

See? You were worrying for nothing. She loves you, always has, always will.

"All right. Then a surprise for you it is." Straightening out, Raleigh rolled down the window and put her feet on the dashboard.

There was nothing like riding in a car with the man you love with the wind blowing your hair.

About twenty minutes had passed before they pulled up to a large wooded area.

"The woods? You're not going to chop me up, are you, Josh?"

"Ray, if you think I could inflict any bodily harm on you, you are seriously senile." Laughing as she got out of the car, Raleigh opted to leave her purse there and just grabbed her cell phone. Meeting Josh by the hood, he instinctively wrapped his arm around her shoulders and led her into the woods

"So, what exactly are we doing here?"

"You'll see." The way he looked down and smiled at her made her so weak, she'd follow him anywhere.

It had seemed as thought they'd walked about a mile before Raleigh noticed a large building type thing a little ways up the trail. "What is that?"

"That, my dear, is where we are headed."

"But what is it?"

"Raleigh, be patient! You'll see soon enough. Now, close your eyes."

"What?" Stepping away from him, Raleigh looked at him as if he had completely lost his mind. "I'm not closing my eyes and walking through thick grass and sticks. You're nuts."

"Just do it. I won't let you trip over anything." Putting his arms around her head, Josh lay his hands gently over her eyes and nudged her forward before whispering into her ear. "Just trust me."

Allowing him to guide her through the mulch, Raleigh hadn't even felt like she was going to fall once. Finally they had come to a stop and Josh slowly took away his hands before telling her she could open her eyes. When she did, her mouth fell open in shock.

"Oh my....Josh this is beautiful."

"It hasn't been used in about ninety years. But this used to be one of the most popular spots for Shakespearean theater. I knew even you could respect that."

Slowly walking forward, Raleigh reveled in the beauty of the old stage and the time and effort it must have taken to build it. Everything had been hand carved and only the best oak had been used. Of course the brush and trees and vines had overgrown it, but it was still stunning.

Raleigh walked up the six steps and stood in the center of the stage, looking outward to Josh. She could feel the long since dead excitement for the stage once again and she wished she could go back into history to see one of those plays played out on that very floor.

Josh walked up the stairs and stood directly in front of her. "You would have made a stunning Juliet."

"I already have my Romeo. Thank you for this, Josh. I had no idea anything like this existed."

"Anything for you. I knew you'd love it." Putting his hand on her neck, Josh softly planted his lips on hers. She responded and he felt like nothing had ever changed.

Pulling away, Josh rested his forehead on hers and left his eyes closed with his hand remaining on her neck. "Ray, I have a confession to make."

This couldn't plague him any longer. He had to tell her, she had the right to know what had been going on.

Did it have to be her?

No. She couldn't do this right now. The full dress rehearsal starts in five minutes and she had to be ready. She needed this workshop. Even one small slip-up couldn't be afforded tomorrow.

"Just breathe...clear your mind." Closing her eyes, Raleigh took in a few deep breaths and tried to calm herself down.

"You know, sometimes it helps to just step away from a practical solution and just smack the crap out of something."

Whipping around, Raleigh felt herself start when she heard the voice come from behind her.

"I didn't know I was being watched." Raleigh allowed herself a smile at the Dan's suggestion. Punching something actually didn't sound half bad.

"Sorry. I just wanted to see how it was going." He walked a few steps closer to her and never looked away. "So what's got you near a panic attack? Not the show I hope."

Shaking her head, Raleigh closed her eyes for a brief moment. "No, I'm totally fine with the show. I've performed a countless amount of times back home."

"Then what is it?"

Her mind screamed for her to tell him, to tell anyone so she could be reassured that feeling this way about Josh's confession was completely normal. But another part of her screamed that she was a hypocrite, judging him for one drunken night when she had done far worse.

When she failed to answer, Dan nodded in understanding, looking down. "I'm sorry, it's none of my business."

"No, Dan, I'm sorry. It's just...I'm having an inner battle with myself." She laughed uneasily trying to mask her true emotions.

"About Josh?" Biting her lip, Raleigh could only nod. She could feel the tears welling in her eyes with a powerful threat to fall.

"I am such a hypocrite."

"Why?"

"Yesterday, he takes me to this amazing place he found just for me and then he tells me that he got drunk and slept with this girl at his school. A girl that I hate. And he just kept apologizing, telling me how much it tore him apart inside for what he did even though we aren't together right now. And I told him it's ok, I'm fine with it."

"But you're not."

"No. And I should be because here I am doing far worse to him."

"Does he know?"

"About you and Effron? No. I couldn't bring myself to tell him. And it's so not fair to him, he deserves better than that. I have never lied to him, but I just couldn't take the chance of him looking at me with disgust for the things I've done."

Putting his hands on her shoulders, Dan looked her in the eyes. "Raleigh, you told me you wish everyday that you can go back and tell Josh that you were pregnant instead of hiding it and getting an abortion. You need to tell him about this. About us. He might be upset about everything, but he loves you. Hell, he's out there in that small audience waiting to see you go out there and shine like the superstar he knows you are. If you guys can get through all the drama you've had to face, you will get through two guys and a girl."

Looking up into Dan's emerald green eyes, Raleigh couldn't stop herself from wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into her. "Thank you, Dan."

"You‘re welcome." He held her for a moment before pulling away. "Alright, well you go on in exactly..." He looked at his watch and his eyes widened. "twenty seconds. So I gotta get back out there. Relax." He kissed her on the forehead before going back out to join the other teachers and Josh.

Finally getting her bearings, Raleigh headed out to where she was supposed to be when the curtain rose and took her stance. It was only the dress rehearsal, but it felt like opening night.

As soon as that curtain went up and Josh saw Raleigh on stage singing and dancing and just having a great time being Mimi Marquez, Josh saw everything that made him fall in love with her in the first place. Her smile, her voice, the way her body moved. She lived and breathed performing, and she was amazing at it. She had such grace and chemistry when moving about with Effron, Josh had a hard time telling himself it was all just an act.

He hadn't wanted to admit it, but at the end of the show, when "Mimi" and "Roger" were performing finale A, he'd had tears in his eyes. Every line of hers, Raleigh said with such passion and emotion. It felt as though she were truly dying in her love's arms. As if it were the last time she'd ever get to tell him she loved him.

Some things just hit way too close to home.

When they ended the show, Josh, along with the professors, stood up, clapping and cheering madly. It had been amazing. There was no doubt in his mind that the audience the following night would feel just as moved by the performance.

Going backstage, Josh went right up to her and took her in his arms, kissing her on the mouth. With a smile, Raleigh looked at him. "what was that for?"

"You were amazing. Can't wait to see everyone's reaction to you tomorrow night."

"Don't make me nervous." Raleigh kissing him once more. "Let me go to the dorm and take a quick shower then we can get going, ok?"

"Alright. I'll just hang out. Call me when you're ready." Keeping to her word, Raleigh took a quick shower and called Josh within fifteen minutes. Luckily the dorms weren't far off from the main building. Upon rounding the corner, Raleigh immediately ducked into a nearby classroom when she saw Effron and Autumn coming toward her. Luckily they hadn't seen her so she could slip back out quietly and head back to Josh. She wasn't really one to avoid people, but Effron was just really bothering her the past few days.

Finally coming back to the auditorium, Raleigh immediately stopped when she saw Daniel and Josh in conversation. Taking a breath, Raleigh figured that just because they were talking, there was no need to worry. Daniel wouldn't tell Josh anything about them.

Sliding into Josh's side, Raleigh plastered a smiled on her face as she kissed Josh lightly on the lips. "Hello Mr. Cooper."

"Ms. Coons. I was just telling Josh here that you did a great job today. I can't wait to see your performance tomorrow night."

"That makes two of us." Josh circled his arm around her waist and gave her a look to show how proud he was of her.

"Thank you, Mr. Cooper. It means a lot to know I meet your expectations for the show."

"Like I told you when I cast you, you were born to play Mimi." Raleigh allowed the redness to seep onto her skin and she looked at Josh.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah. It was nice meeting you, Dan."

"And you, Josh. See you tomorrow, Raleigh." Raleigh waved him a goodbye before looking at Josh once again.

"You're on a first-name basis with my theater professor?"

Shrugging, Josh continued to look ahead of him. "He's a cool guy."

Raleigh felt her mind swimming. Great. This was just great. She had planned on telling Josh everything, about she and Effron...and the guy Josh thought of as cool. How was he really going to react now? Once they got up to Josh's hotel room, He immediately embraced her, meeting her mouth with his. Raleigh nearly allowed herself to lose her thoughts in him, but she couldn't. It was too important that he know the truth about what she'd been doing.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He looked at her with such care and worry it caused the guilt to thicken within her.

Putting her hand on his cheek, Raleigh willed the tears away. How many times was she going to cry over this man? "I don't deserve you."

"Ray, you're scaring me, what's going on?" When she just dropped her hand and looked away, Josh put his finger under her chin, bringing her eyes to meet his. "If it's anything, it's me that doesn't deserve you. I mean, you've forgiven me for a lot of things. You've allowed me a second chance at your heart. And I love you for that."

"Josh, I would have given anything for you to look at me like this four months ago when I thought it was impossible for you to forgive and love me again." Swallowing, Raleigh took a breath before continuing. "And I'll give anything for you to look at me this way after I tell you what I need to."

Why at those words did Josh's stomach suddenly drop? "Raleigh, what are you talking about?"

"Yesterday, when you told me about you and Erin, I lied to you about being ok with it. It really bothered me and got me thinking, what if she really was the reason you had sent that letter, breaking up with me? What if you had lied to me about her when she came to see you in Shelby? But it took a lot or courage for you to tell me you were sleeping with her, and I know that if anything else had been going on you would have told me yesterday. So I have no reason to not trust you when you say nothing is going on with her emotionally. And I have no reason to not tell you, what's been going on here while you've been at NYU."

Josh laughed a little, trying to lighten the mood. "What, are you sleeping around or something?" When Raleigh only looked away and bit her lip, Josh knew this topic was anything but light-hearted. "Raleigh, I was joking."

"I know. But I'm not."

Nodding, Josh willed himself to continue looking into her eyes. "It's Effron isn't it?"

"That obvious, huh?"

"Well, its not like the guy was hiding his obvious disdain for me. And now I know why. But I can't really say that I can blame the guy. You're an amazing woman, Raleigh. Any guy would be blind not to go after you." After a moment of silence, Josh quietly asked, "So...are you still seeing him?"

"No! No, it's over between us. Whatever we had going, it's over. For good."

"Ok." Wrapping his arms around her, Josh pulled her back into him. "Then I have nothing to be upset about.

Yes you do.

Her head screamed for her to tell him about Daniel, but she couldn't bring herself to. Josh liked, and more importantly, respected the man. How could she tell him that the guy he looked up to was sleeping with his student? She was honest with him about Effron, that was enough.

---

Looking around her, Raleigh took in her surroundings. Everyone was stretching, exercising their voices, or trying to calm their nerves. The show opened in less than five minutes and it was a full house. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't nervous, but Raleigh was nowhere near as bad as Autumn. She'd thrown up twice already.

Closing her eyes, Raleigh rolled her head from side to side, taking deep breaths. Suddenly someone grabbed her and put their mouth to hers. Opening her eyes, Raleigh saw it was Effron and she immediately pushed him away.

"What are you doing?"

"I just wanted a good luck kiss." He gave her his egotistical smile and she fought to not smack it right off his smug face.

"Effron, Josh is out there. He's here in LA."

"Yeah, and?"

"It shows how much he really does love me and I love him back. I won't do this anymore. You and I are done and as far as I'm concerned, nothing ever happened." She could tell she'd hit a nerve by the way his jaw twitched and the look in his eyes, but she didn't give a damn. Someone needed to put a knotch in his pride.

Before Effron could get out another word Dan was back there clapping his hands together to get all of his students' attention.

"All right, thirty seconds to curtain so take your places! Break a leg everyone!" Casting one more glance to Effron, Raleigh took her stance and put her focus fully on her performance. She refused to let one guy stand in her way from giving her all.

When the show was over, Raleigh hugged everyone as they celebrated. Everyone had been on and they all felt the critics were going to give rave reviews. The audience had responded extremely well and all the professors seemed thrilled and pleased.

Pulling away, Autumn shouted above the cheering. "Josh has had you to himself since he got here so I think you guys need to come out with us all tonight and celebrate."

"You know what? A night out sounds great."

"Good. We're gonna go and shower and change then we're all meeting up at the Neon Blade. My cousin just re-opened it and its even hotter than before. She'll hook us up."

"Cool. I'll go change and get Josh and we'll see you there."

"Awesome." Autumn hugged her once more before getting lost in the crowd once again.

After putting her sweats back on, Raleigh went out to the audience, which now only held the professors speaking with a couple reporters and Josh. She immediately jumped into Josh's arms and kissed him.

"You never cease to amaze me, Ray. The show was great. Better than everyone's expectations I think."

"Thank you, Josh. Hey, do you want to go out tonight? Everyone's going downtown to a club Autumn's cousin owns."

"Sure." Josh put his arm around her waist and as they walked away, Raleigh looked over her shoulder back at Dan. He waved and gave her a smile as if to say everything was going great. Once they got to the hotel, Raleigh got in the shower then dried and curled her hair, did her make-up and put on the dress she'd been dieing to wear.

As soon she was happy with her appearance they left the hotel and got back into the car and headed to meet everyone.

Once Josh threw the car in park, Raleigh got Autumn on the phone.

"Hey, you guys here yet?"

"Yeah, we're at the door waiting for Violet so get your ass here."

"We're coming." Raleigh closed her phone and they headed to the front door, getting there just as Autumn hugged a woman she assumed was Violet.

"Girl I haven't seen you in so long. How big is Blaire now?"

"Oh she's getting big. You really need to come over. She misses you."

"I will. Are you gonna get a chance to come to the show?"

"Yeah, we have tickets for Friday night."

"Awesome. So this is basically the main cast. Effron, Ember, Davey, Raleigh and her friend Josh."

"It's nice to meet you all. I'm gonna take you all up to VIP and all drinks are on the house." Violet put an X on everyone's hand as they walked through the crowded club and up to the VIP section.

Raleigh already felt like a star. The group immediately went to the bar and did two shots for the great show then they all dispersed to dance with different people. They had only been there an hour and Raleigh was beginning to feel the effects of the alcohol and it was welcomed. Autumn and Ember had disappeared to the bathroom for a few minutes and Raleigh knew they had hit a few lines and she was tempted to join them, but she couldn't. Josh couldn't know. What would he think? Raleigh felt someone tap her on the shoulder and she rolled her eyes when she saw it was Effron.

"Mind if I cut in?"

"Yes." Raleigh said sharply as Josh backed away with a no. "What?"

"Hey its alright. I gotta hit the head anyway."

"Ok." But that didn't stop her from reaching up and kissing Josh deeply in front of Effron. Looking at Joshing lovingly, She said "Hurry back." Of course the dj chose that moment to put on a slow song and Effron wasted no time in pulling her to him.

"You know, if I recall correctly, just a few days ago you were dieing to touch me, now lover boy shows up and suddenly you don't want to be near me. Why is that?"

"Because from the second Josh got here you've been a total prick. Would it kill you to be even a little nice?"

"I am nice. But see, I think you don't want to be near me because you're afraid you might slip up in front of Romeo there. I know how I make you feel, and in your mind staying away is easier than looking at me and not being able to touch." Effron took a hold of Raleigh's hand and slid it down to his waist before getting ever closer to her, his lips just a whisper away from her own. "But it just makes you want me that much more." Raleigh felt her eyes close as she reveled in his feather light touch, the sweet hot breath slowly blowing onto her lips, she ached to move that one tiny centimeter and kiss him the way she hadn't been able to in what felt like so long. As their bodies swayed to the slow, erotic beat, Raleigh imagined them on his bed, intertwined in the heat of passion once again. She could feel him within her, hear her gasps for air as the pleasure became nearly too much for her to take.

Effron bent his head and slowly licked the sweat from her neck, trailing soft wet kissing up to her ear where he whispered, "So tell me, is the sex that much greater with Romeo?"

Opening her eyes, Raleigh forced herself from the fantasy and she pulled away from him. "You have some nerve, Effron."

"Ah, so that is it isn't it? You've left me because you're getting it elsewhere. You don't want to feel like a total slut so you stay away from the one you lose control around."

"I would love nothing more than to slap that smug smile off your face right now but I refuse to make a scene in Autumn's cousin's place." Getting close to him, Raleigh made sure he saw her point as clear as day. "And not that it's any of your business, I haven't slept with Josh in nearly a year."

Walking away from him, Raleigh tried her hardest not to turn around and punch him right in the nose.

"Hey, you alright?" Autumn asked as Raleigh came over to grab her purse. She had seen the entire thing and she had been sold, fully thinking Raleigh was about to grab him and devour all her senses in him right then and there, regardless if Josh was there or not.

"Fine. I'm just gonna go out and get some air."

"Want me to go with you?"

"No that's ok. I'll be back in a few. Just let Josh know for me, huh?"

"Yeah."

As soon as Raleigh got outside, she pulled a pack of Marlboro smooths from her purse and lit up, taking a long drag and slowly exhaling. "Oh it has been far too long, my friend."

Coming out of the club, Josh saw Raleigh leaning against the wall looking up at the sky and he headed over to her. Stopping mid stride, he shook his head when he saw her raise the cigarette to her mouth and she took a long drag of it before flicking some ashes to the ground.

Going right up to her, Josh simply said, "Thought you quit."

"I tend to smoke when I get stressed."

"You know, it does nothing but give you cancer."

"So you've said." Raleigh smiled as she took one last puff and dropped the cigarette to the ground and put it out with her foot. "You remember the last time you said that to me?"

"Oh yeah. You slapped me, called me a backstabbing bastard or something of the like and stormed off."

"Well you pissed me off."

"Well I was mad at you. Honestly I was surprised James wasn't there."

Raleigh had to allow herself to laugh. "You beat the hell out of him! He may have been an asshole but he wasn't stupid enough to show his face around you after that."

"In my defense, he deserved it. Shouldn't have been running his mouth like that."

Looking at Josh, Raleigh felt herself biting her lip. She should have told him this from the first accusation. "Josh, I need you to know something."

"What's that?"

"I never slept with James. You and I were broken up but...I still loved you too much to be with anyone else."

"You know, part of me wanted to believe that all along but the fact that you never denied it was just too much."

"Yeah, I know." Putting his arm around her, Josh pulled her to him and he kissed her head.

"Come on, I think we could use another drink."

"Oh yeah."

Getting out of the bed, Josh pulled on his boxers and looked around the room. The coffee pot was on and her purse was still on the chair by the door, so she had to be there somewhere. Finally coming to the balcony door, he saw her standing by the railing in his pajama pants and the button down shirt he had worn at the show last night. The way she held her arms around herself as she looked out on the city below, Josh knew she was in deep thought, biting her lip as she tried to keep from crying.

Opening the door, Josh slipped through and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him.

"Good morning, Beautiful."

Feeling Josh behind her, Raleigh closed her eyes as she melted into his touch. "Good morning."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Liar."

Sighing, Raleigh figured she might as well be honest with him.

"It's just...I feel like whenever we work things out so we can be together we have to separate again. I wish we could go back to the way things were. That we could go back home, before everything changed."

Hearing the tone in her voice, Josh knew there was a deeper meaning to her words, but he refused to pressure her into telling him. It would just make her put up all her defenses and pull away. Turning her around, Josh took her hands in his. As he looked into her eyes he forced out his voice.

"Raleigh, I love you, you know I always have. But we can't go back to who we were in high school. We can't pretend that everything that's happened this past year hasn't. It did happen and we're stronger for it. We can't go back, but we can move forward." Still holding her hand, Josh pulled her back into the room with him.

Raleigh watching curiously as he looked around in his bag for something. "What are you doing?" But he didn't respond.

"Where is it? I know I put it in here."

"Josh, what...?" But her question hung in the air when he let out a small cry in triumph.

"A-ha! There you are!"

Standing up, Raleigh noticed how Josh held his hand in a fist as he clutched something. Moving in front of her, Josh looked down for a moment before meeting her lilac eyes once again.

"Ray, do you love me? As much as you always have?"

With tears in her eyes, Raleigh nodded. "Even more." As he looked down and swallowed, Raleigh felt her heart thundering in her chest. What was he doing? Was he about o do what she thought he was? How would she react? Finally meeting her gaze once again, Josh held up the object he'd held so tightly in his hand.

Raleigh let out a gasp as her hands flew to her mouth in surprise.

"Oh my God...Josh..." Her voice was a whisper but he caught every meaning in those few words.

"Raleigh, I'm not asking you to marry me. This is a promise. A promise that when we're out of school and able to be together, we will be."

Not even taking the ring out of his hand, Raleigh threw her arms around his neck, allowing the tears to fall freely.

"I love you so much, Josh."

Finally releasing her, Josh took her hand and slip the expensive ring up her slender finger.

"Josh, its gorgeous." It was a thin silver band with an emerald cut sapphire with three small diamonds on both sides. "I can't believe you'd spend so much on a promise ring." She said in astonishment, looking at the piece of jewelry that would mean so much.

"You're worth every penny." Looking at him in that moment, Raleigh knew. No matter what happens, no matter what they are forced to endure in the years to come, they will be together.

After all, love does conquer all.

Later on, after much love making and tears, Raleigh and Josh found themselves at the airport, unable to believe the past ten days had gone by so fast. Raleigh wrapped her arms around his waist, holding onto him for dear life.

"I don't want you to go."

"I don't either, but I have to. Think I missed enough classes." He let out a small laugh as he ran his hands up and down her arms.

"Call me when you get back?"

"Of course." Leaning down, Josh kissed her lightly, but that wasn't nearly enough. He encircled her waist and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss.

God how he wanted to sweep her away to where they didn't have to wait to be together. To make love to her again and again until they couldn't breathe. To never let her go ever again. It felt like he had just gotten her back. How could he be expected to say goodbye now?

The final boarding was called and Josh forced himself to pull away.

"I have to go."

"Uh-uh." Raleigh pulled him back to her and kissed him again. "I'm not ready to say goodbye yet."

"You have to." Finally stopping kissing him, Raleigh rested her head on his chest. Trying desperately to will the tears away. She wasn't strong enough to live without him again. She could try all she wanted but she knew temptation would over power her as it had before.

"We'll see each other in three and a half weeks. It's not that far off."

No, but it seemed like an eternity.

"Ok." Finally letting go, Raleigh kissed him one final time. "Bye Josh."

"Bye." With a sad smile and a wave, he was gone, walking onto his plane. Raleigh stayed with her face on the glass window, watching him depart until she could no longer see the airplane. Then at last, she went back to her dormitory.

"Hey you."

"Hi, Autumn."

Autumn knew Raleigh had just said goodbye to Josh but she hadn't expected her to be this upset about it. She couldn't imagine being that into a guy.

"I'm assuming he's on his way back to NYU?"

"Yep."

"Girl, you gotta snap out of this trance! I couldn't imagine being that into a guy like Josh."

Turning on Autumn, Raleigh could feel the fire and rage burning through her. "A guy like Josh? What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Look, Ray he's a nice guy and everything, but he's just not..."

"Not what? Effron?"

"Well, yeah."

Nodding her head, Raleigh tried hard not to really speak her mind. "Yes, well that's one of his best qualities. Effron's an asshole."

"He was only that way because he has competition now."

"There is no competition. I am not a prize to be won! I chose Josh long before I knew other boys really existed. He loves me and you better believe I love him." Holding up her hand, Raleigh let the proof sparkle in Autumn's face and her jaw nearly hit the floor. Immediately she grabbed her hand and gawked at it.

"Oh my God...he proposed?"

"Basically." But Autumn hadn't heard, she was too busy inspecting the ring.

"Damn but the boy has good taste. That ring is gorgeous."

"I know." Pulling her hand away, Raleigh played with the ring.

"Ray, I'm sorry. I just don't know what it's like to be so madly in love like that."

Seeing the way autumn looked away, shielding her eyes from her, Raleigh knew she'd felt that love once upon a time. But either it hadn't lasted and he'd hurt her, or something else had torn them apart. Wrapping her arms around her, Raleigh hugged tight until Autumn let go.

"Well, I was going to go hang out with Ember for a while. Wanna come?"

Yeah, Ember, drugs, and alcohol. That should be a good time.

"No, I'm just going to go for a walk or something."

"Ok, I'll see you later." Raleigh waved at Autumn as she left and the first thing Raleigh did was sign online and email Bobbie and Carly. She told them everything that had been going on and about Josh giving her the ring. God how she missed everyone.

Deciding she couldn't sit there without ripping her hair out, Raleigh grabbed her purser and left. Where she was headed she had no clue, but she had to get out, try to clear her mind. After walking around aimlessly for nearly an hour, Raleigh found herself staring at Dan's front door.

How did I get here? Why am I here?

"I shouldn't be here."

Just turn around and leave, you were never here.

She kept telling herself to leave, go back to the dorm or something, anything, but she couldn't move. She didn't know why, but she wanted to see him. Wanted to speak to him.

Finally walking up to the walkway, Raleigh was surprised to see the door swing open before she ever got to the steps.

"Raleigh." Dan said in surprise, slowly descending the stairs.

"Hi, Dan." She said sheepishly.

"What are you doing here?"

I have no freaking clue.

Shrugging, Raleigh stepped a little closer to where Dan stood. "I'm not really sure. I went for a walk and the next thing I know I'm standing here, in front of your house."

"Oh." The silence that followed his short sentence seemed deafening, Raleigh had to say something to break the awkwardness.

"I should go. You were on your way out. Sorry I came. I didn't know what I was doing - well I did know what I was doing, I was walking, but that's not the point -"

"Raleigh?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up." He smiled at her and Raleigh couldn't help but to smile in return. He was just too infectious. "I was just going to pick up some Chinese for dinner. Would you like to join me?"

Everything inside her screamed for her to say no. Just turn around and go back to the dorm and wallow in self-pity. Alone.

"I don't want to be alone."

Did I seriously just say that out loud?

Raleigh felt like covering her face and running away. He'd probably think she was a weak little girl who wanted attention. But that wasn't it at all.

Dan smiled at her once again and reached out to take her hand. "Then you won't be."

Smiling, together they got into his escalade and drove to get a late dinner. She hadn't felt hungry but once they returned and opened the boxes, Raleigh felt her stomach screaming for food. As she ate she tried to control her laughter as she listened to Dan's horrible jokes.

"Ok, did you hear about the three guys who headed out for a good time one night? Two of them walked into a bar."

"Yeah?"

"The third one didn't."

Sitting there for a moment, Raleigh shook her head. "I don't get it."

"He ducked."

They both laughed and Raleigh couldn't help but say, "Oh my God that was bad."

Dan feigned a hurt expression which made Raleigh laugh even harder. "I'll have you know that I happen to like my jokes."

"Well, at least you do." Jumping up from his seat at the island in the kitchen, Dan chased Raleigh around the house until he finally caught her in the living room. Together they fell to the couch and Raleigh gasped for air as he tickled her relentlessly.

"Take it back!"

"Never!"

Getting right up under her shirt, Dan continued the torture until Raleigh was red in the face from laughter.

"Ok, ok! I take it back your jokes are great!" But he hadn't planned on letting her get away so easily. Fortunately for her the telephone began to ring. Muttering an apology, Dan got up and strode over to the phone and picked up the receiver.

"Hello? Yes I accept. Les, what did you do this time?"

Raleigh stood up and straightened out her clothes as she watched how Dan reacted to whomever he was speaking with. He closed his eyes as his hand came up to pinch the bridge of his nose between his gorgeous green eyes.

"Leslie, I can't keep dropping everything to bail your ass out of jail every time you decide you want a drink." He let out an aggravated sigh and rolled his eyes. "Les...Leslie! Stop crying. I will come and get you but understand this, this is the absolute last time. Alright, I'll be there soon. I love you, bye."

Feeling a little awkward having just witnessed that conversation, Raleigh didn't really know what to do with herself.

"I'm sorry you had to hear that."

"Its not your fault."

"I have to go and pick her up, take her home."

"I should probably get going anyway." Raleigh turned around and picked up the pillows that had fallen off the couch.

"Raleigh, you don't have to leave. I can't make you stay but I would like it if you did."

She found herself torn. Should she leave and go back to her dorm where she'd be alone, or where Ember and autumn were, living it up? Or should she stay and wait for him to return from bailing this woman out of trouble? With Dan's big, hopeful green eyes staring at her, Raleigh found it nearly impossibly to say no. Why did he have to be so damned cute?

"I can stay."

"Good, thank you. I'll be back in a half hour, forty-five minutes, tops."

"Well I think I can find something to occupy my time." Raleigh let out a small laugh and Dan kissed her on the forehead.

"I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Ok." She watched him grab his keys off the rack by the door and he left.

Turning around, Raleigh looked at the room. Normally she and Dan were either in the study, kitchen or upstairs so she hadn't spent any time in the living room. About six feet from the doorway was a large corner couch, facing away with a bunch of large oak cupboards hiding what she assumed was the television. The one side of the couch was against a wall, while a table adorned the back of the other. A doily and a dark wicker basket sat on the stone top table. Looking to her left, Raleigh's jaw dropped to the floor when she set her eyes on the stereo Dan had.

"Hello, my love." Going over to it, she immediately pressed the power button and Boys Like Girls cut the silence and she found herself singing along and dancing around the room. "Tonight will change our lives. It's so good to be by your side. But we'll cry. We won't give up the fight. We'll scream loud at the top of our lungs. And they'll think it's just cause we're young. And we'll feel so alive." Not watching what she was doing, Raleigh tripped over a stool and fell into one of the cabinets on the wall.

"Ow, son of a bitch." Rubbing her head, she suddenly felt very glad nobody could see what she was doing. From the corner of her eye, Raleigh saw that one of the doors had opened and inside, stacked side by side, were hundreds of DVD's. Unable to stop herself, Raleigh opened all the doors and was once again speechless to his movie collection. To the right of the TV stood, Raleigh was pretty sure, every single musical ever made.

"Wow."

She found herself running her fingers over the many titles and she couldn't decide on what she'd like to watch. Then her eyes landed on a certain title and she wasted no time in grabbing the case, opening it and putting in the DVD.

After piling up a few pillows to lean on, Raleigh curled up under the afghan that had been thrown on the back of the couch and hit play.

-----

Fully ready to apologize as soon as he entered the house, Dan was surprised when he didn't see Raleigh. Maybe she had left after all.

No - what was that?

Soft music filled Dan's ears and he immediately knew what Raleigh was doing. She had picked one of his favorite movies of all time to watch.

He knew Raleigh hadn't fallen asleep, but she was so glued to the man and woman on the screen that he was able to walk right up behind her without her even noticing. Crouching down so his mouth was level to her ear, Dan waited until exactly the right moment to say, "Here's lookin' at you, Kid."

Raleigh gave a little start and turned her head to smile up at him. "Will you watch it with me?"

Dan had never heard a more innocent request. How could he refuse? "Of course."

Together they watched Casablanca and eventually drifted off to a sound sleep, the sounds of the love Rick and Ilsa shared drifted softly through the air.

"Ray, wake up."

"No." She mumbled, trying to snuggle further into the couch.

"Come on Raleigh, wake up." Turning over, Raleigh finally looked at Dan, through her one opened eye she could see how great he looked even this early.

"Going somewhere?"

"Yeah. I have a meeting with Dean Farsely in half an hour. All the way across town. You know normally I wouldn't be kicking you out so early."

Yawning and stretching, Raleigh decided it was best that she leave so early anyway. "Alright." Standing up, she got her purse and put on her shoes before turning back to the man who should be nothing more than her instructor.

"Thank you for last night, Dan."

"Anytime." Raleigh gave Dan a kiss on the cheek and after feeling like she had lingered a bit too long, she muttered a quick "bye" before practically running out the door.

This isn't right. I shouldn't be feeling this way.

Watching Raleigh go, Dan fought hard not to touch his cheek where her lips had just been. Her boyfriend had just left, she was upset. She even said herself that she hadn't wanted to be alone. She had come to him only because she didn't know what else to do. She didn't feel everything he felt when he was with her. Last night all he had wanted was to take her in his arms and make love to her over and over, bringing her to the most pleasurable release she'd ever known. When she looked up at him with those big lilac eyes he felt like an open window, begging her to come just a little closer and take a better look at who he really was. To see what he felt, pleading for her to feel the same. He'd known many women in his lifetime, had many students. Sure he'd been hit on quite a few times and even had some students bold enough to advance on him right after class. But he'd always turned them down gently and sent them on their way. Most forgot about the encounter by the next day. Not once did he ever indulge himself with even a little taste of the forbidden fruit.

But then Raleigh Jean Coons came into his life, bringing back emotions he hadn't known in years. A hunger built inside him from every shy glance, every blush when he caught her looking at him, every brush of her long, slender fingers on his bare flesh. He'd never known a longing like this before. It was nearly overwhelming, the want he felt for her. Not just physically, but mentally and spiritually as well. He wanted nothing more than to make her his.

But Daniel Cooper was neither stupid nor blind. He'd have to be to miss the rock she was now wearing on one very important finger.

Of course he had known the history Raleigh shared with Josh, but seeing it firsthand had hurt him more than he cared to admit. Which was why he was backing off. No more late night rendezvous‘, no more take-out, no more sex, no more bad jokes. No more relationship of any kind aside from student-teacher.

Realizing he was now running late, Dan grabbed his car keys and ran out the door. He made it to the restaurant a record breaking sixteen minutes later and went in, finding the dean with no difficulty.

"Daniel, nice of you to join me."

"I apologize for keeping you waiting, Scott."

"You're six minutes late, not a big deal. Please, sit." He motioned to the seat across from him and Dan sat down. Dean Farsely was an ex-marine. A man completely capable of killing someone without much force, but he was also one of the nicest men Dan had ever known.

"So, it's been a while since we've been able to actually sit down and catch up. How's everything?"

"Uh, great. Everything's going great."

"Good. How about that cousin of yours? Staying out of trouble?"

Feeling himself smile, Dan shook his head at the older man. "She'll never stay out of trouble. You know that as well as I do. She called me to bail her out again last night."

"Please tell me you didn't." His silence was enough of an answer for him. "Daniel, when are you going to learn?"

"She's family, Scott. My only family. I'm not gonna turn her away just because she's made some bad choices. And I told her it was the last time."

"Good. So I asked you here to congratulate you on the amazing show you put together."

"You forget I wasn't the only one behind it."

Scott waved his hand dismissively before speaking again. "It was your show whether you want to believe it or not. It was your idea and you are the one who put the cast together and worked with them to perfect the songs and steps. Like I've told you many times before, you could do great things. Why you continue to work at the college is beyond me."

"I love my job. How many people can honestly say that?"

"Not many." He agreed.

As they at their breakfast and continued conversing, Dan found his mind once again filled with thoughts of Raleigh. He silently berated himself for wondering where she was, what she was doing. Was she thinking of him?

"Daniel!"

"What?" Snapping back to reality, Dan felt the embarrassment of having been caught drifting off seep onto his face.

"Where'd you go, just now?"

"Nowhere. I'm here."

"Physically, yes."

Sighing, Dan ran his hand through his growing hair before looking back up to his old friend. If he didn't tell him he'd guess anyway. He never could hide anything from him, what's the point in trying to now?

"I've been seeing this girl and like so many others she has a past filled with pain and love. She always said she and her childhood/high school sweetheart were going to be married one day when they could be together. I knew this from the beginning and was completely fine with it because we weren't serious. We were just having fun I guess. But when he came here to visit her last week, I felt so unbelievably enraged when I saw them together. I mean, don't get me wrong he's a great guy, and while I hope she gets what she's always wanted, a part of me is screaming that they've already have their chance." For the first time in a long time, Dan felt the urge to punch something, then get completely obliviated.

"You fell in love with her." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah, I think I did." There was a short silence before he spoke again. "He left yesterday and she came over a few hours later. Said she didn't want to be alone. I don't think she realized that I saw the very small skating rink now occupying her left ring finger.

"Seems like you've found yourself in quite a tangled web."

Taking a sip of his coffee, Dan nodded. He couldn't agree more. "Scot, you've been like a father to me since my parents died. What should I do? Should I pursue her in hopes that she chooses me or back off, let her live her life with him?"

Chuckling to himself, Scot couldn't help but to find the situation ironic. About twenty years ago he'd found himself in the same predicament. So, he gave Dan the same advice his father had given him.

"I think you should give her space. Don't call her, don't answer her calls. Don't see her. Let her find out how she truly feels when you're not there. I'm sure she'll realize within a few days that its you she wants. Like you said, they had their chance. Unfortunately, you can't ever go back to the way things once were."

Just shut her out of your life.

The words echoed in his mind like a chant. Could it really be that simple? Could he actually do it? He had come to really enjoy her surprise visits, now he was dreading the next one. He'd have to tell her something. But something else plagued his mind.

What if she didn't choose him?

After leaving his breakfast meeting with Scot, Dan went to the grocery store and for the first time in nearly two months he bought more than enough food to fill his kitchen. After getting home and putting away all the groceries, Dan decided to call Leslie to see how she was doing. After some friendly conversation, and assuring her for about the hundredth time that he didn‘t hate her, he hung up and busied himself with cleaning. He tried to focus on anything but Raleigh and what he had to do. He felt like he was back in school, lusting after the popular girl while he was a nobody.

You're pathetic. A grown man practically crying because she's engaged to her childhood sweetheart.

"I don't even know that she's engaged. What am I doing?"

Oh come on! You saw that rock.

Putting his hands to his forehead, Dan tried to rub away the headache that had begun to creep up on him.

There had to be something he could do to keep his mind off Raleigh. But what?

The guest house. He'd wanted to finish it months ago but he got too busy to think much of it lately. Working on it would take his mind off everything.

---

Going up to the front door, she didn't even hesitate to ring the bell. She wanted to see him. Wanted to see his reaction when he saw her. She felt like an entirely new person. Hopefully he liked this new woman.

After ringing twice with still no answer, Raleigh looked through the window. The lights were on and his car was in the driveway, he had to be home. Raleigh rang once more and when he still didn't answer she decided to try the door. To her surprise it was unlocked and she let herself in, shutting the door behind her.

"Dan?" Raleigh swallowed the uneasy feeling she got and went room to room to see if he had fallen asleep. She hoped that's all it was. He never left the front door opened at night. He knew how the people of LA were.

"Dan?" She called out a little louder, this time the sound of a saw followed her voice.

Going through the kitchen, Raleigh went out the back door and was relieved to see him outside the rather larger guest house. Slowly walking up behind him, Raleigh stopped a few feet away to just look at him for a minute. All her wore was a pair of blue jeans held up by his favorite brown leather belt. His tan muscular back glistened with sweat and she wanted nothing more than to reach out and run her hands all over his delicious body. But that probably wasn't the best idea. The man did have a saw.

She waited until he was done cutting the board before announcing her presence.

"Hey there hot stuff." Dan started and jumped around, not prepared for a visitor.

"Raleigh, don't you know not to sneak up a man holding a saw?" turning away from her, Dan set down the saw and took off his goggles and gloves.

"Well, I waited until you turned it off to say anything." She defended. She heard the small chuckle leave his throat and she found herself smiling, and wishing he'd look at her.

Damn it. Why did she have to come here tonight? Just to scare the hell out of me?

He didn't want to look at her. If he looked at her he might not be able to do what he knew he had to. But he had to look at her. No matter what, he refused to be rude.

As soon as he turned around he wished he hadn't.

Good lord. How was he ever going to get through this conversation? Not only was she standing there smiling up at him looking damn good in her tube top, skirt and heels, but she had cut her hair. There were multiple layers and the longest fell about an inch below her chin. Her bangs slanted mainly to the right covering a small portion of her eye. The slight curl to her dark hair, that was now highlighted with blond and red, blew gently in the wind.

Dan knew his mouth was open unattractively so he forced himself to close it before drool began to stream out. "You're hair..."

Self consciously, Raleigh reached up and touched her much shorter strands. "Yeah, I was ready for a change. Do you like it?"

"Yeah I do. You look great." That was an understatement if he ever heard one. What he wanted to say was that she looked damn sexy and he wanted nothing more than to take her right then and there. But he couldn't. Instead he cleared his throat and said, "Are you going out?"

Shrugging, Raleigh took a few steps closer to him. "Maybe. You bought me dinner last night so I'd like to buy you dinner tonight." Smiling, Raleigh ran a hand down his naked, sweaty chest, reveling in the feel of his muscles twitching beneath her touch. "Though you may want to put on a shirt."

As much as he liked the feel of her hand on him, she made the mistake of using her left hand. As soon as he saw the large ring, he remembered what he had to say to her. Grabbing her hand before it went any lower, Dan pushed it away but didn't let go.

"Ray, we need to talk."

"Ok, what about?" He got the distinct impression she knew exactly what this was about.

"I think it'd be best if we continued on as nothing more than teacher-student."

Ripping her hand out of his grasp, Raleigh took a few steps back, furrowing her brow in confusion.

"Why? What's this about?"

Meeting her wide eyes, Dan decided right then, he felt like complete shit. "I think you know what this is about." He made it a point to look down at her hand.

Following his gaze, Raleigh looked down at the ring that sat on her finger. What did she really want?

"Raleigh, I like you, but I can't pretend that there's anything more here between us. I think it's for the best that we no longer see one another outside of class."

Looking back up into his emerald eyes, Raleigh hardened her face. "Fine. If that's what you want." He just nodded in response.

"Goodnight, Mr. Cooper." Without another word, Raleigh turned around and went back through the house to get out and head back to the dorm.

As soon as Raleigh got out to the street, she wasted no time in pulling out a cigarette and lighting it, taking a long drag. Leaning her head back, Raleigh let the smoke fill her, relaxing her.

What the hell just happened?

Getting back to the dorm, Raleigh went through the door and slammed it shut, causing Autumn to jump off the bed.

"What the hell, Raleigh?"

Raleigh didn't respond. Instead she just paced back and forth, tapping her lips with her finger for a few minutes, completely ignoring Autumn's sighs of annoyance. Suddenly she stopped wearing a hole in the rug and faced Autumn.

"Let's go out."

"What? Raleigh, we have a class at eight thirty tomorrow morning."

"So? Since when do you let that stop you form going out and having a good time?" Contemplating her words, Autumn had to agree with her. She was known for partying late when she had early classes.

"Where do you want to go?"

"Um, how about that new one? Crimson?"

"Crimson? I've been dying to go there!"

Smiling, Raleigh pointed to the bathroom. "Then you better go get ready." Autumn ran into the bathroom and started the shower. "You have a half hour!" Plopping down on her bed, Raleigh took out her cell phone and made a few calls to Ember, Davey and yes, even Effron to invite them out. Well, technically she told them they were going out and to be ready in a half hour. Effron just said he'd meet them all there since he didn't live at the dorm.

Exactly half an hour later, Autumn was ready to go and Ember and Davey were knocking on the door. They came inside and Davey whistled.

"Damn Raleigh, you look hella fine."

"Thanks Davey. Ya'll ready to go?"

"In a minute." Ember said before pulling out a small baggy with a white powder on it. This time when they passed around the small tube, Raleigh didn't hesitate. She put it to her nose and quickly did two lines, loving the burning sensation as it worked its way into her system. Who did she have to impress anymore?

"Alright, let's go." Not cleaning up the table, the small group left the dorms and got into Autumn's car and headed to the brand new club that had just opened up. By the time they got there Effron was already waiting outside for them and they had no trouble getting inside. They found a private table off to the side of the dance floor and when their waitress came over they ordered two shots of tequila each and a beer. Once she came back with their order, they each held up one of the shots.

"To being free to live our own lives." Effron said and Raleigh couldn't help but to say "Shit I'll drink to that!" and they all downed both shots. Beer in hand, Raleigh stood up and asked Effron to dance with her. If she thought he'd say no she was seriously mistaken. He'd been waiting for this for a while now. No more Josh, and it seemed like she was crawling back to him, just like he told her she would.

Raleigh felt great. Sure she already had nearly an eight ball of cocaine and enough alcohol in her system to light up the city park, but who cared? She was having the time of her life and Effron felt too damn good grinding up against her back side.

The beat suddenly slowed down immensely and Raleigh turned around, wrapping her arms around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I have a confession to make."

"What's that?" His hot breath was right on her ear and it sent a chill down her spine, she could feel the heat pooling between her legs.

"When Josh was here, I became a bitch to you to hope you would stay away, so he wouldn't find out what I've been doing. But I told him and he didn't care." Raising her head so her mouth was level with his ear, she whispered, "But I never stopped liking..." She ran her tongue slowly along the lobe of his ear, liking how he took a sharp intake of breath. "Or wanting you."

Grabbing onto her hair, Effron pulled her head back so he could look in her eyes, not even blinking when she flinched in pain. "If you're trying to trick me right now, I won't fall for it. Don't fuck with me."

"Eff, I'm not fucking with you. You told me you were falling in love with me. I'm not the kind of person to toy with your emotions like that." Reading nothing but the truth in her eyes, Effron pushed her head forward and met her hot lips with the kiss he'd been waiting for. She slowly ran her tongue along his bottom lip and he sucked it into his mouth.

Raleigh could feel him growing hard against her and she smiled against his mouth. "Wanna get out of here?"

"You have no idea."

What had happened last night?

She didn't know what was scarier. The fact that she couldn't remember anything from last night after getting to the club, or the fact that she was naked, in Effron's home, covered in a white powder she assumed was cocaine. How much had she drunken last night? How much had she snorted? Feeling her stomach lurch once again, Raleigh leaned forward, emptying her stomach even more. Good lord, how much could one person throw up?

"Man, that's a lot of puke." Effron said as he leaned against the doorframe.

"Thank you for that brilliant observation." Raleigh got out before more vomit poured from her mouth. When she was satisfied that she was finally done, she resumed her position on the floor.

Going over to the sink, Effron ran and wash cloth under cold water and crouched down beside Raleigh, pressing the cold cloth to the back of her neck as she rested her head on her knees.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm puking like the chick from the exorcist. I'm just fucking peachy." She mumbled out, trying not to flinch at the awful taste of the bile in her throat as she swallowed.

Feeling the trembling of her body, Effron tried to help her up. "You should get in the shower. Might make you feel better. Cleaner anyway."

"Ok." She really wasn't in a position to argue so she allowed him to help her up and into the shower. The hot water felt like heaven as it poured over her body. Not caring that she'd smell like a man, Raleigh washed her hair and body with Effron's soap and shampoo and sat under the hot water until it ran cold. Finally turning the water off, Raleigh stepped out and wrapped herself in the large, soft towel.

Effron must have been listening for the water to turn off because he entered the bathroom just as she stepped out. "Here's a new toothbrush, toothpaste is there, mouthwash, here." He pointed as he spoke. Opening the cabinet, he pulled out a bottle of aspirin and poured two into his large hand. After replacing it in its spot, he handed them to Raleigh. "Take these and when you're all set I'll drive you back to the dorm. You can wear this. I don't think you want to put your outfit from last night back on." He set a pair of his sweat pants and a t-shirt on the sink before smiling at Raleigh.

Looking into his eyes, Raleigh felt a new sense of respect for this man begin to build inside her. "Thank you, Effron. You didn't have to do all this."

"Well, I want to take care of you, Love. Besides, I know what it feels like to be in your place." He winked at her and left her alone to do her business.

When she was done, she noticed Effron had changed the bed sheets and blankets and folded her clothes neatly in a pile, her shoes beside them along with her purse. Maybe he really wasn't such a bad guy after all. Grabbing her things, she went out into the house to find him. He was in the living room, cleaning off the coffee table.

"I really can't remember a thing from last night."

Effron lifted his head and she noticed the surprise clearly written in his eyes.

"You can't remember anything?"

Shaking her head, Raleigh grabbed some paper towels and windex and helped him clean up a bit. "After the fourth round of Jose Cuervo and sixth line of coke, no I can't remember a damn thing."

Effron laughed as he dumped the paper towels into the garbage can. "Well, I guess I can't say I'm really surprised. I haven't seen anyone party that hard in a while."

"I guess I wanted to have a good time, get my mind off things." She said sheepishly, continuing to clean.

Straightening up, Effron closed the distance between he and Raleigh. Putting his hand on top of hers as she cleaned the end table top, he stopped her movements. Meeting his eyes with hers, Raleigh lifted an eyebrow in question.

"So, you don't remember what you said to me before we came back here then, do you?"

Her mind reeling, Raleigh tried desperately to remember anything that she might have said to him, but unfortunately her memory returned nothing of help. "I'm sorry, Effron, but no."

He nodded his head and she watched as something changed in his eyes. He seemed to withdraw from her as he forced a smile her way. "It's alright. I should get you back to the dorm so you can change. You have class in forty minutes."

Merely nodding her head in response, Raleigh threw her rag into the trash and grabbed her things from the bedroom before following Effron out to his car. They sat together in uncomfortable silence as he drove, the sound of the engine being drone out by the sound of Journey's Faithfully.

As he stopped in front of the large building, Raleigh unbuckled her seatbelt and turned to face Effron. "Thank you for taking care of me this morning. I really made a mess."

He reached over and tucked a damp piece of hair behind her ear. "Anytime, Raleigh Jean."

"I'll see you later." Opening the door, Raleigh hopped out and shut it, watching him as he drove off. She didn't know why, but she had to keep herself from smiling when he called her Raleigh Jean. No one, aside from her sister when she was angry with her, ever called her that. She found she rather liked it.

Giving herself a mental shake, Raleigh headed up the stairs and into the building, wasting no time to go up to her dorm and change. After brushing her hair hastily, she didn't bother to do anything with her naturally wavy hair and threw it up into a messy ponytail, her bangs falling in front of her eyes. Grabbing her notebook, Raleigh stopped in front of the mirror hanging on the wall long enough to noticed she looked like absolute hell, but she could care less. She had no one to impress.

Leaving the room, Raleigh shut the door behind her and headed to her first class of the day. The one she dreaded most of all. She once had always looked forward to going to Mr. Cooper's class, but that was before. Before he had ended them.

Before he ripped out the heart she didn't know had begun to belong to him.

Stopping dead about five feet from the classroom door, Raleigh scrunched her brow in concentration and confusion. Where had that thought come from? But what worried her most was, when had she begun to fall for the man who no longer wanted to be a part of her life?

Sliding into her chair, Raleigh set down her notebook and rested her head on the desk. A few minutes later, Autumn sat beside her, looking about as great as Raleigh did. Hair up in a messy ponytail, wearing sweats, no make up on her face at all. They may have been the life of the party the prior night, but now they were paying for it.

"If you ever get the great idea to go out partying when we have an early class the next day, I'm gonna smack you." She grumbled, lying her head on her own desk. "I've never puked so much in my life."

"Trust me, I don't think I have either. Can you at least remember some things about last night? 'Cause I sure as hell can't."

"Nope."

"Alright, everyone settle down, take your seats." Dan, or Mr. Cooper, as she now had to refer to him as once again, came into the classroom and Raleigh immediately sat up. She didn't want him to know just how much he had truly affected her. But as soon as his gorgeous green eyes met with hers, she knew he saw right through her little façade. He seemed to hold her gaze for hours but it was only mere seconds before she found the courage to look away. She had seen something in his eyes, but what? Pain? Longing? Affection?

No, she was imagining things. If he had felt anything like that towards her, he wouldn't have ended whatever it was they had between them.

How could he do that to her? Couldn't he see just how much she really needed him? How could he just walk away from her? From what they had started? It had only been not even twenty four hours yet, but she already missed him. At least before she knew he was there whenever she needed to talk, or just be held. Sure she could call up Josh or Carly, but they weren't there. They couldn't console her when she was upset the same way. They couldn't rub her back or take her in their arms, letting her cry on their shoulder. With Dan she had felt so comfortable. He had seen through everything she had put forth and saw right down to who she truly was. What was she going to do without him?

When the lesson was over, Raleigh wasted no time in closing her notebook and practically running out the door, completely unaware of the look Dan had been casting her way.

Over the span of the next week or so, Raleigh found herself back to being the person she had been before Dan had called her out. She began losing herself in the drugs, alcohol and meaningless sex she never thought she'd ever be a part of. Sure she had come to find that Effron really was a nice guy, but she just didn't feel anything for him. There was no...spark for lack of a better word. He would remain a friend to her. Nothing more, nothing less.

She wasn't a complete idiot. She knew he wanted more, but he just had to realize and accept the fact that she had nothing to give anymore.

"I need another line, Ember."

"Shit girl, what you need is sleep."

Smiling, Raleigh tried to stand up, only to feel herself fall back onto the couch, on top of Autumn. "Ember, please just put out another line."

Autumn put an arm around Raleigh and tried to hold her still. "Ray, honey you really don't need anymore."

Ripping away from Autumn, Raleigh stood on her unsteady feet. "Don't tell me what to do! I'm sick of everyone telling me what to do! First my mother, then my sister, now you? Today is my grandmother's birthday, did you know that? No, of course you didn't. Because you don't know shit about me!" Raleigh's voice had started becoming louder and louder with each sentence until she was screaming, tears streaming down her face.

"Raleigh..." Autumn's voice was much softer this time when she spoke which only infuriated Raleigh more. Where had this outburts come from? She had been sitting there, chilling with she and Ember, having a good time. What went wrong?

"Don't touch me!" Backing up, Raleigh headed towards the front door, forgetting her purse.

"Where are you going?"

"For a walk. You're not invited."

"Raleigh, it's the middle of the night! You're not going out there alone."

"I do it all the time." With that she slammed the door closed behind her, not caring what Ember and Autumn thought. She had to get out, had to get away from them, away from anyone. She needed to cry. But she really didn't want to be alone. She wanted to be with someone, but that someone didn't want to be with her. She longed to feel his arms around her, consoling her as she cried, which she knew he'd do if she went there right now and told him it had been her dead Grandmother's birthday for three full hours now. God, she missed her Grammy. She had been the only one to truly understand her situation when she'd been pregnant and aborted it. She was the one who had even taken her to the clinic. No, she didn't condone that type of behavior, but she had understood how she'd felt.

Grammy always understood her youngest granddaughter, no matter what it was. But now she was gone.

She had nobody left.

As Raleigh stumbled down the street, she began to recognize where she was. How long had she been wandering around? An hour? A few minutes? She didn't know, but she headed straight to the familiar porch and rang the doorbell over and over. When he didn't immediately open the door she began pounding on it. She could feel the tears streaming down her face, but she didn't care. She had to see him. She had to know why he had just ended it like that.

She had to feel him against her, his arms wrapped tightly around her body.

Suddenly the door swung open and a sleepy, angry looking Daniel Cooper stood there, glaring at her. God, he was gorgeous with his mussed hair and angry face. "Raleigh, what the hell? It's three-seventeen. What are you doing here?"

Wrapping her arms around herself trying to calm her sobs, Raleigh just said one thing. "Why?"

Taking in Raleigh's appearance, it was clearly obvious that she had been up all night throwing back shot after shot and probably putting even more drugs into her system. But it wasn't the glazed looks in her eyes or the unsteady balance that kept her up. It was the way she held herself in the middle of the porch, it was even more so the tears than streaked down her red puffy face.

Suddenly the anger faded away and he only felt concern for her. Why was she here in the middle of the night? Crying no less. It couldn't all be because of him telling her what he thought would be best.

When he failed to answer her, she repeated herself. "Why, Dan? Why did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"You know what!" She practically yelled and if he didn't want to have the cops called on him this early, or late, he had to take her inside.

"Raleigh, why don't you come inside so we can talk." As she glared at him, she didn't say anything, she just walked past him and into the house. As soon as he shut the door behind himself, Raleigh slapped him in the face. And not lightly. He was too stunned that she had actually hit him to do anything but look at her. When she raised her hand to strike him again, his reflexes kicked in and he grabbed her wrist, stopped her mid swing. Almost instantly she raised her other hand to hit him, but he caught that one just as quickly. For what seemed like eternity, they just stared into one another's eyes, neither daring to look away.

Finally, Dan gave up and let go of her wrists. "Raleigh, what are you doing here?"

"I just want to know why you ended it."

"Raleigh, I told you why."

"No you didn't!" Raleigh knew her voice was whiney and needy, but she didn't care. She was upset and she needed to know. "I just..." She felt the tingling in the back of her throat and knew a fresh bout of tears was just seconds away. In a strangled, whispering voice, she got out, "Couldn't you see how much I needed you?"

Standing there, watching the normally calm and collected Raleigh break down into sobs, Dan wanted to hit himself. This past week had been hell for him and obviously just as bad for Raleigh. How could he have ever doubted her feelings for him? All he wanted to do was take her in his arms, tell her everything was going to alright. But he didn't know that it would be.

"I don't have anyone left. Josh is in New York, my friends are all back home. And you left me. I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I'm slowly losing who I used to be." As she spoke more and more tears pooled in her eyes, begging to fall as she tried desperately to hold them back.

As he watched her lip quiver, Dan did what he had wanted to do all week and stepped closer, putting his arms around her shaking body. At first she fought him, harder than she thought she could, but he refused to let go. Eventually she gave into his embrace and broke down into terrible, loud sobs. She couldn't stand anymore, she could feel her legs give out and she sank to the floor, Dan with her all the way, holding her, cradling her fragile body in his lap.

How could he have done this to her? Why couldn't he have seen how much she really did need him? With all the late night visits that had stopped leading to sex, but were just as satisfying because he was able to hold her as she slept? All the glances she'd sneak his way during class, every slight brush of her hand. It was never meant to be seducing, although it was. But she had just wanted him, mind and soul. Now he knew that. And he wasn't letting go.

He respected Josh, but he had to think of himself once in a while.

She'd never hit anyone in her life.

Except for Jenny in the third grade, but in her opinion, that bitch had it coming to her.

Slowly and carefully Raleigh turned over so she was now facing Dan. Not once had she ever woken up before him. She'd never been able to watch him sleep. He looked so peaceful, portraying the innocence of a little boy. The same innocence Raleigh wished she could possess once again.

A soft curl had fallen over his forehead, and very softly she reached out and smoothed it back with the rest of his soft, dark hair. She allowed her hand to linger there as she tried to memorize his face just like it was. Every small freckle you wouldn't know was there until you've been this close to him. Even line, the curve of his lips as he smiled in his dreams. God, but the man was gorgeous.

Running her hand slowly down his bare arm, Raleigh outlined each curve of every muscle. Once she came to his hand, she entwined her fingers with his, continuing to take in his beautiful face. She felt overcome with feelings she had never felt for another man who wasn't Josh and it made her worry. As she looked down to the hand she had laced with his, she frowned at the ring that sat there, sparkling gloriously in the dim morning's sun rays.

What about Josh?

What about everything they'd been through? But then again, what about trust? He said he could trust her, but he didn't know everything she was doing. She'd told him about Effron, but also that it was over. She could have never brought herself to say anything about her relationship with Dan, or even the drugs. She knew she could trust Josh back in NYU, but she didn't. Erin was there and she was a very pretty girl. Josh had already been tempted and tasted. Would he again?

She didn't want to hurt him. But what was she supposed to do? Did she even have to say anything? All the ring was, was a promise that they'd be together again. Someday.

Someday wasn't today. They weren't together, she was free to live her own life and be with whoever she wanted. That person was lying right beside her, sleeping like a baby. Would she ever want to be with Josh again? Raleigh loved him, she knew she always would. But when he'd come to LA for her birthday, something had changed. As happy as she was to be with him again, as much as she truly did love him, she knew she wasn't in love with him anymore. And as much as she hated to admit it, she couldn't ignore her heart screaming that they'd had their chance. And it ended when he left for NYU and sent that letter. She had forgiven him long before she admitted it to anyone and she thought it had been because she knew she loved him and they would be together no matter what. But now she knew that it would have been only a matter of time before life tore them apart.

A part of her wished that they could just go back to the way things were when they were kids in little Shelby Forrest, not caring about anything but each other. Back to the first time he held her and they made love. Back to sneaking out behind their parents' backs and meeting at the lake, coming home at obscene hours of the night just to see her mom and dad waiting up for her only to say go to bed, we'll deal with it in the morning. She'd been grounded more times than she could count because she refused to stop seeing him.

Joshua Scott Chasez.

As a child she had imagined out their entire wedding numerous times, each different in their own way. Once on the beach of the lake, once in a far away place made just for them. No matter how many different ways she dreamed it up, the bride and groom had always been the same. Thinking back on it now, Raleigh felt the sadness that swept over her entire body at knowing one of those dream weddings might not become a reality. She might never be Raleigh Jean Chasez.

What hurt most of all was finally being able to let go of all those dreams and moving on. She and Josh had had their time. Now it was time for her to be with Dan

Maybe they would be together again later on down the road, maybe they wouldn't. But Raleigh had to go her own way and do what was best for her. Regardless of how selfish that made her feel.

"How can I love you so much yet know so little about you?" She whispered to the sleeping man before gently placing her lips on his. She held the kiss for only a few seconds before she eased off the bed and went into the bathroom. The large whirlpool bathtub, that looked more like a hot tub than a bath, seemed to call to her. She began running the hot water and, after finding some bubble bath and pouring a bunch in, she undressed and eased into the hot, welcoming water.

She just lay there, relaxing in the sudsy water, allowing it to wash away all of her fears and doubts about the future. She soaked in the wonderful water until the bubbles were nearly gone and the water had run cold before she got out and clothed herself in a pair of Dan's boxers and one of his wife beaters. She couldn't help but to revel in the smell of them. The clean smell of the laundry soap he used was intoxicating. He never wore after shave or cologne so he always smelled of his laundry soap. She loved it.

Leaving his master bedroom, Raleigh headed down the stairs and to the kitchen to make some much needed coffee. She had to stop the binge drinking and drugs. She didn't like who she became when she was wasted. She did too many things she couldn't remember, and that scared her more than anything.

When the wonderful smelling liquid finished brewing, Raleigh poured herself a cup, black, and headed out to the backyard and sat down on the bench on the patio near the large in-ground pool. She loved Dan's house. It was big, but not insanely monstrous, and even though he was the only one who lived there, he'd made it a home. Not just a cold shell of a house, but a real, warm and cozy home. It was the type of place she'd love to live in after she got out of school.

She set her mug on the table next to her and brought her knees up to her chest. As she wrapped her arms around them, she reveled in the cool morning air. She loved morning. Most of the world was still sleeping so it was quiet. The sun was just barely peaking out so the sky was brilliant shades of pinks and oranges. With the palm trees all around, Raleigh would have loved to paint the image of the sunrise. If only she had some brushes, an easel, paint and talent for painting. She may have had a gift when it came to singing and writing music, but when it came down to being an actual artist, she downright sucked. But one couldn't be great at everything.

As she sat there, lost in her thoughts just watching the sun rise into the sky, she jumped nearly out of her seat at the feel of Dan's hands on her shoulders.

"I'm sorry, did I startle you?" She felt his smile as he leaned down and planted a kiss on her neck. "You smell delicious. Like vanilla."

"I took a bath." Dan walked around the bench and sat beside her, pulling her to lean into him. She gave in willingly.

"You're up early."

"I know. I woke up and was ready to start my day." She let a small laugh out before continuing. "Well, in a manner of speaking." Right there, leaning against him, his arms wrapped around her, Raleigh hadn't felt so content in a long time. She felt like she had just come home after a very long, and hard, trip. He may have been older and her instructor, but she belong with him. She could feel it down to her very core. But that didn't change the fact that they needed to talk.

"Dan?" She whispered as though she would destroy the beautiful scenery if she spoke any louder.

"Mm?" He hummed, his chin resting on top of her head.

"You know we need to talk some things out, right?"

"You still want to know why I ended whatever it was we had, right?"

Regretfully pulling out of his warm embrace, Raleigh turned to look at him as she took his hands in her own. "I need to know why you would if its this obvious you want us to be together. If you didn't you would have kicked me out last night."

"I do want us to be together. And while it is true that it would be better for us to not be together considering my job and your education, that wasn't the reason I did what I did."

"Then what was?" Did she really want to know? For the first time in a while, Raleigh's mind was suddenly filled with the image of the picture on Dan's nightstand. The face of that woman smiling up through the photograph of a time that had apparently been great. Then she remembered that telephone call she'd witnessed between him and some woman named Leslie. The woman he'd offered no explanation for. The woman he told he loved.

Was she his reasoning?

Looking down at their entwined hands, Raleigh felt like a fool. But still, she had to know. "Is it Leslie?"

"What?" The shock on his face made her feel even worse, but she really hadn't been prepared for the loud, boisterous laughter that came from his mouth. Why was he laughing at her? "I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh but...oh man. I meant to tell you about her when I got back that night but you were so into the movie I just forgot."

‘Here it comes,' she thought. He was going to tell her they were a couple and she had been nothing but a toy for his amusement.

"Leslie's my cousin."

"What?" She mimicked his voice from just moments before. She certainly hadn't been prepared for that.

"Yeah. Her mom took off when she was still a baby and her father, my uncle, died when we were nine. My parents took her in and she's been the closest thing I'll ever have to a sister. I've been watching out for her since we were fifteen." Feeling her face redden with embarrassment, Raleigh hid it in her hands.

"I'm such an idiot." Regardless, she felt herself laugh at her own stupidity as he peeled her hands away from her face.

"No, you're not." His smile faltered as he looked down and she felt him playing with the ring on her finger. She suddenly knew why he had done it. "I did it because of this. Because of who gave it to you and the reasoning behind it."

Meeting his sad greens eyes, Raleigh understood for the first time. He thought they were engaged. That as soon as she left Hollywood Academy of the Arts, she would be devoting her life to Josh. While at one point that had been true, it wasn't anymore. And she had to assure him of that.

"Dan, we're not engaged."

"You're not?" He looked so completely adorable when he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"No." She shook her head. "This was a promise that we'd be together when we finished school."

"Was?" She didn't miss the hopeful tone in his voice and it made her smile.

"I don't want that anymore. You breaking off whatever we'd had made me realize what it is that I really want."

"And what is it that Raleigh Coons wants?" Dan leaned forward and Raleigh did the same, their mouths mere inches from one another.

"To be with you. In a real relationship." She whispered causing a huge grin to pass over his gorgeous mouth.

"I want the same thing."

Dan put a hand on the back of her neck, gently pulling her towards him until their mouths met. Raleigh encircled her arms around his neck and tangled her hand in his curls. The kiss was slow and passionate, igniting every single nerve she possessed on fire. His mouth was hot and wet, his tongue felt amazing as it slid past her lips and in to massage with her own tongue. His hands felt like molten lava as they ran up her bare back below the beater. He pressed her into him allowing her to feel just what she did to him. She completely melted into him, giving into her every desire as they coursed through her. She wanted him.

God, how she wanted him.

She'd never known this feeling before. She'd never wanted a man this bad before. She wanted him to take her up to his bed, undress her slowly, tease her and make her scream for him to make love to her before he finally gave in, slowly bringing her to a climax releasing a complete state of euphoria that would have her seeing stars.

Pulling away from the kiss, Raleigh put her mouth beside his ear and as she tried to catch her breath, she whispered the words that sent chills up and down his spine.

"Make love to me."

Tightening his arms around her waist, Dan lifted her up, carrying her into the house and up to his bedroom. He gently laid her on the bed, never breaking their kiss. As she had wanted, he'd made slow, sweet torturous love to her, bringing her up twice before finally letting go of himself.

Thoughts of how much he loved this girl turned woman within a few short months wracked his brain. A few times he had to swallow back the words. Could he tell her that he was in love with her after such a short time? How would she react? It was now obvious that she truly did care about him, but did she love him the way he loved her?

After he was sure she had fallen asleep, he got out of bed and pulled on his boxers before leaving the bedroom. Going down to the study, Dan picked up the telephone and dialed Scott's home number. He knew he wouldn't be at the college today but he knew he'd do him the favor of finding someone to cover his five and seven o'clock classes. He'd just gotten Raleigh back, he wasn't leaving her yet.

Of course his old friend was ecstatic to find out that he had been right and told Dan to spend some time with her. He'd take care of everything. After thanking the man, Dan hung up and went to the kitchen to make a late breakfast and some fresh coffee. He wished he could take her out like real couple, but the threat of losing his job was still too real. He'd have to wait until Christmas vacation or spring break when he could whisk her off somewhere where nobody knew them. Until then they'd just have to stick with his home.

Since Autumn had already known about she and Dan, Raleigh figured it wouldn't hurt to tell her everything that had happened between them and now they were out looking for something Raleigh could wear on Thanksgiving. Since she didn't know if they were going out or staying in, She and Autumn decided a simple dress would suffice. While at the mall, Raleigh had tried her hardest to get Autumn to go into Hot Topic. She avoided it at all costs, telling Raleigh what they needed they wouldn't find there. Raleigh of course knew this but she just wanted to look around. It had been a while since she'd been there and she wanted to see what new things they'd gotten in. Finally after much hard work on Autumn's part, she'd steered Raleigh away from the store and got her into DEB. Within ten minutes Autumn was hollering for her to come check out what she'd found.

"What about this? Its kind of dressy, but not fancy." Autumn held up a dress that was a strapless, light beige color with a brown tie around the waist as well as brown edging. The dress was elegant yet conservative with its pale green and pink flowers decorating it. It was actually a lot prettier than Raleigh would have guessed if someone had just described it to her.

"You know what, I actually like that. Let me go try it on." Raleigh took the dress from Autumn and headed over to the dressing rooms. When she had it on, she opened the door so she could show Autumn.

"Damn, Cooper won't know what hit him. You're getting it right?"

Looking at herself in the mirror, Raleigh smiled. It fit her perfectly. Falling to just above the knee and not showing much cleavage, she decided it was perfect. Since it was November and even Los Angeles wasn't absent of cold days during the winter, Raleigh picked out a matching sweater to wear over it. After deciding on a pair of shoes to go with the outfit, Raleigh cashed out and together they walked to the food court.

"So what are you doing for thanksgiving?"

"It's two days from now and you're just asking me?" Autumn laughed and shook her head as she smothered a French fry with ketchup. "Mom and Dad want me to come home so I'm gonna drive up to the Valley tomorrow morning." Raleigh noticed the hint of resistance in her voice to go home and she wondered why. Shouldn't she be excited to go home?

"Why don't you sound excited to be going home for the weekend?"

"I'm happy to be going home and seeing my family, but there's just other people I'd rather like to avoid."

"Oh." She could relate to that just a little too well. Changing the subject, they began talking about school and how they thought they'd do on the finals next month. Autumn seemed a little nervous but Raleigh was confident she'd pass everything. Then she'd be one semester closer to being able to be with Dan openly.

God, she missed him. She hadn't been able to really spend time with him the day before since he was getting the final exam together with a couple of the other instructors so she couldn't help but to feel really excited for tomorrow.

---

"Damn it! Where are you?" Rushing around her dorm room, Raleigh tried to remember just where she'd last taken off her gold locket. Carly had given it to her for her sixteenth birthday, inside were their faces as tiny eight year olds and the engraving "Friends Forever." She'd barely worn it since she'd been so terrified it'd fall off and she'd lose if forever, but now she realized she had a better chance of losing the precious piece of jewelry if she just put it in some random place. She should wear it at all times.

A loud knock sounded on the door, interrupting her rummaging for the time being. Getting off her hands and knees - she'd been searching under the futon - Raleigh went to see who was knocking on her door this early on Thanksgiving. She'd assumed everyone she knew had gone home for the holiday. She was somewhat pleasantly surprised to see Effron standing there, looking insanely good in his khaki dress pants and black button down shirt. His short blond hair was spiked with gel and he smelled incredible from whatever cologne it was he was trying this week. Whatever it was, it was her favorite so far. Effron's face adorned a bright smile that Raleigh just had to return.

"Hey Beautiful. You look amazing."

"Thank you. You do as well." She opened the door wider and motioned for him to come in. "What's up?"

"Well, I'm on my way to my dad's house and I was hoping that you would accompany me. But seeing your attire, I'm assuming you already have plans."

"I do, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I just thought I'd ask."

"Thank you for the thought."

"Anytime." Effron leaned down and wrapped his arms around her small frame. Closing his eyes, Effron took in her scent of Jasmine and lavender, and tried to imprint her in his mind. He never wanted to forget her.

Pulling away, Effron said, "Don't have too much fun."

Smiling, Raleigh couldn't help but to be a little teasing. "You know I always have too much fun." He gave her a smaller smile than she liked and backed away.

"I'll see you on Monday, love." He winked at her before turning around and walking out of the dorm.

Just standing there, Raleigh felt conflicted. Something was obviously bothering Effron and she wanted to see if he was all right, but then she remembered that she'd been looking for her necklace. And she was now running late.

"Shit!" After completely destroying the room, she finally found the locket under her bed. It must have fallen off while she'd been asleep. After fastening it securely around her neck, Raleigh threw on her sweater and grabbed her purse and bag that contained the ingredients for the dessert. After giving the room one last once over to assure herself she had everything, Raleigh shut the door and headed to Dan's, receiving a very welcoming phone call on the way.

"Hey, Bobbie. Happy Thanksgiving."

"Happy Turkey Day, little sis!"

"Bye five minutes, Bobbie."

"Yeah yeah." Raleigh could hear the smile in his voice and it made her really miss home for like the hundredth time since being in LA. "So what are you doing on this glorious holiday in LA since you refused to come home?"

"I refused to come home because I'll be there in three weeks. And I'm on my way to a friend's house."

"Ah. And could this friends be a guy that is really more than a friend but you don't want to tell your favorite sibling?"

"And just who said that you were my favorite sibling?"

"Process of elimination, my dear sister. Nick and Alan are just assholes and Janie's a bitch."

Raleigh felt the laugh as it escaped her throat but she still felt like she had to defend her family.

"You're just jealous because they protect me and not you. And Janie isn't so bad." Raleigh thought back to the night of the carnival back in July. She and her big sister really had a heart to heart. A much needed one that had cleared a lot of the tension between them. It turned out that they weren't so different after all and all of Janie's confessions had had them crying together for the first time since Nick and Alan had given all their Barbie dolls crew cuts.

"Right. But you didn't answer my question. Who's this guy?"

"He's just a...wait. I don't believe I said it was a guy."

"No, but you just did."

Shaking her head, Raleigh decided to confide in her brother. If she couldn't trust her own twin, who could she trust?

"Alright, I'll tell you but you can not repeat this to anyone. I mean it!"

"Ok, ok I promise."

"His name is Dan and yes, he's more than a friend."

"Oo, great. How'd you meet? He in one of your classes?"

"Uh..." Raleigh hesitated for a moment. Could she really tell him? "Kind of."

"Kind of? What do you mean, kind of?"

"Well, let's just say we really shouldn't be seeing one another."

"You are not sleeping with your teacher!"

"Bobbie! Could you say it any louder? I don't think the ambassador of China heard you!" She hissed into the phone, positive everyone in the house had heard him yelling. One of the other members of her family calling and lecturing her about her dating choices was just what she needed.

"I'm sorry, Ray but Christ! How old is he anyway?"

"Twenty five."

"Really?" She wasn't surprised to hear his surprise over the mans age. Usually when someone thought of a professor in a college they immediately thought old timer. "Well, I guess that's not so bad."

"What, you thought I'd sleep with an eighty year old man?"

"I don't know. Maybe you have a sick fascination for wrinkly old balls."

"Robert, you are absolutely disgusting." Raleigh scrunched up her nose with disgust but she laughed none-the-less.

"I know. Just tell me he treats you well and I'll sleep better at night." Raleigh knew her brother well enough to know that he was no longer joking around. Ever since James he'd been so protective over her. That's why he'd been so happy she and josh had reconciled. He was always good to her.

Walking up Dan's front porch, Raleigh had no trouble answering honestly as she rang the doorbell. "He treats me really well, Bobbie. You have nothing to worry about." She knew she was smiling like a fool, but she couldn't care less. For the first time since she came to LA, Raleigh felt truly and utterly happy.

"Good ‘cause I'd hate to come all that way just to chop his balls off. You tell him that for me. He better treat you right or your psycho twin will be at his front door, smiling like a maniac and holding a machete." Raleigh heard a muffled sound in the background and knew Bobbie was getting beckoned away. "Listen, I gotta go."

"All right. Give everyone my love?"

"Of course. Love you, little sis."

She heard him snicker and she just shook her head. The door opened just as Raleigh said, "I love you too, Bobbie." and hung up her cell phone.

"Happy Thanksgiving." Raleigh said before leaning up and planting a kiss firmly on Dan's lips.

"Happy Thanksgiving. Who was that?"

"Bobbie. He says if you hurt me you're going to find him smiling like a maniac on your front porch holding a machete fully ready to chop your balls off." Raleigh was completely surprised she had gotten all the way through that before bursting into laughter. And it wasn't repeating what her brother had said, it was the look of pure horror and confusion on Dan's face.

"Who is Bobbie? And you told him about us?"

Shrugging, Raleigh turned around to face him as she walked backwards to the kitchen. "I figure if I can't trust my own twin, who can I trust?" She noticed the smile as it formed on his beautiful lips and she knew exactly what he was thinking as he slowly stepped closer to her, putting a hand on her hip to pull her forward.

"Twin huh? Too bad he's not a girl."

Laughing, Raleigh smacked Dan on the arm. "Pig."

"Yeah, but you love it." Feeling the closeness of his body, Raleigh decided that it would be better if she backed off a bit. There would be plenty of time for them later.

"I have to go and start our dessert. It's going to need a while to sit." Dan followed Raleigh to the kitchen and leaned against the counter behind her.

"Just how many siblings do you have?"

"Four. My older sister Janie, my two older brother, Nick and Al, and of course Bobbie. My twin."

"So they're really protective of their baby sister, huh?"

"You have no idea. You should have seen them when Josh came home for the summer. I thought Janie alone was going to tear him a new asshole when he showed up at my show." Dan's smile faltered and Raleigh felt like sticking her foot in her mouth and choking on it. Why did everything have to lead back to Josh?

Awkward.

Turning around, Raleigh took his hands in hers. "I'd really like you to meet them sometime." Putting her hands on either side of his face so he'd look at her with those gorgeous emerald pools, Raleigh added, "As my boyfriend."

Allowing the smile to return to his face, Dan slowly leaned down. "I'd love nothing more." Then he met her lips with his own. The kiss wasn't hard, fierce, or insinuative. It was gentle and everything Raleigh loved about a kiss. It was perfect.

He was perfect.

Pulling away, Dan rested his forehead on hers and closed his eyes. "Here, with you, it's finally beginning to feel like the holidays again."

Raleigh knew Dan's parents had died when he was young so all he had left for family was Leslie. That in itself said a lot. She couldn't imagine being alone on every holiday. It was difficult enough for her to be away from her large family just this once.

After kissing him once more, Raleigh turned away from him and opened her bag, pulling out the ingredients and spreading them all out on the counter top.

Resting his head on her shoulder, Dan tried to think up what exactly she was making them. There was chocolate pudding, vanilla pudding, oreos, cool whip, butter, and a can of cherry pie filling.

He was clueless.

"What the hell are you making?"

Raleigh smiled as she took one of the mashers out of the drawer to her right and a bowl from the cupboard.

"Sex in a pan." she said matter-of-factly. "It's really good."

"And is it as good as sex?"

"Sometimes it's better."

"Well, I'll leave you to it then." And that's just what he did. He went into the living room and turned on what she assumed to be football from the sound of his yells.

"Men and their sports." She mumbled to herself as she mashed up the oreos and melted the butter to begin forming the crust. Just as she was spreading the cool whip over the cherry filling, Dan came back into the kitchen complaining of boredom. She watched as he opened the fridge and pulled out a white casserole dish with something that looked like seaweed inside.

"What the hell is that?"

One look at the disgusted look on her face and Dan busted out laughing. "They're called cigars." Taking off the glass lid, Dan lifted the slimy green leaves to reveal some neatly rolled links. "It's lamb and rice rolled in grape leaves. It's really good."

"Ok." Finally noticing the number of dishes around the kitchen, Raleigh's eyes widened. "How much food did you make?"

"Well, of course the traditional turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce and devilled eggs. Then there's the shireae..."

"The what?"

"Shy-re-ay. Then the grape leaves, rolled cabbage, kubbeh, and baklava. Oh, and khubz arabi, which is bread. I think you'll really like the bread." Staring at Dan, Raleigh felt like a complete idiot.

"Are you even speaking English anymore?" Dan just laughed at the look on her face.

"It's Syrian."

"Are you Syrian?" It's funny, she didn't even know his nationality.

"Mostly. My grandparents on my mother's side came over from Syria. Let me tell you right now, we're like the Italians and Greeks. We love our food."

"I just can't believe you're making all of that for just us."

"Well, I like variety and I eat a lot." he began picking at the counter top and she knew there was something he hadn't told her.

"Dan, What's up?"

"I uh...I invited Leslie."

Well, she hadn't been expecting that. "Oh."

"Leslie's my only family. I couldn't let her spend today alone. We're usually together for the holidays unless she's off on one of her adventures."

"Dan, its ok. I love that family is so important to you. I just didn't think you'd tell anyone about us."

"Well, if you can't trust blood, who can you trust?" He smirked at her before pulling her into his arms and planting a kiss on her lips. "Besides, she's happy I'm finally getting laid."

"Oh my God, Dan!" Raleigh smacked his arm once again with mock dismay before laughing. "I can't believe you just said that."

"Well, its true." just as he leaned down to capture her lips once again, the doorbell rang. Groaning, he pulled away reluctantly.

"Are you ready for this?"

"Are you?" She retorted, laughing as he shook his head while walking away.

Dan would be lying if he said he wasn't a little nervous to be having Leslie meet Raleigh, but she owed him a lot for all those times he bailed her out of trouble. And he wasn't lying when he said that he trusted her. They were always close and nobody could keep a secret better than Leslie.

Opening the door, Dan braced himself for the powerful hug she always gave him.

"Hey, Danny! I missed you."

"Missed you too, Les. Staying out of trouble?"

"I'm trying. I got a job."

"Really? That's great."

"Yeah. I'm just a secretary at the high school but its something. Can you believe it was a high school of all places that hired me?"

"That is surprising. But I'm proud of you, Les." And he truly was. She needed to turn her life around.

"So, where is she?" Leslie was obviously excited to be meeting Raleigh. Dan hadn't dated anyone since his fiance left him for his best friend four years earlier. She'd been pregnant and he was so happy he could hardly stand it. He'd gone nuts, buying cribs, clothes, toys, a stroller that came with the car seat - he'd bought everything any baby would ever need. Then one day, two months before the baby was due, she'd told him that she'd been cheating on him and the baby wasn't his. He never questioned her, never asked for a paternity test. All he did was kick her out of his home and his life, saying he never wanted to see her again. He was hurt and angry from being betrayed by the woman he loved and the man he called his best friend.

If he ever saw either of them again, whether they're still together or not, he didn't know what he'd do. The pain may have dulled, but it never went away.

She had sort of ruined him until Raleigh had come into his life, making him feel the things he had forgotten once again.

Leslie liked the girl already.
---

It was funny how easily Leslie lied and kept secrets from Dan. He trusted her unwaveringly. When nobody else was there, he always was, backing up her every word. Raleigh had no idea how she kept this secret for so long.

Yes she did.

If Leslie admitted it to Dan, he'd say she was a liar and throw her out. Mostly because he didn't want to believe his own father had been so unfaithful and cruel to both his wife and his own brother or that she knew for however long and never mentioned it.

Raleigh hated the position she was now in. Leslie had gotten slightly inebriated at Thanksgiving and spilled her guts to her. Did she tell Dan herself or keep quiet, telling Leslie she had to tell him? But on the other hand, what was it really hurting, hiding the truth?

Besides, Raleigh didn't really care how they were related, just that they were. Leslie was gorgeous.

Good lord was she gorgeous.

The woman stood about 5'9", was attractively thin - obviously fit- and she had legs that seemed to go on for days. Her smile alone would have been enough to make any man go weak in the knees. Her eyes were almond shaped but contained the same emerald green as Dan's. Her long hair, falling to her mid-back with longer bangs that framed her heart shaped face, was also the same dark chocolate, except hers was void of the curls Dan's held.

Thinking back on her initial reaction when she'd entered the kitchen, Raleigh was unwaveringly happy they were family. She had no doubts that Leslie and Dan would be together if they weren't.

Not only was the woman stunning to look at, but she was incredibly brilliant and talented. How she always got herself into trouble was beyond Raleigh.

She'd gotten a full ride to Harvard Law but she dropped out in her second semester for reasons she refused to tell anyone except Dan. She was also musically inclined, playing the violin with absolute precision and grace. When she'd asked her why she didn't go back to school to put her brains and talent to good use, she just looked down at her folded hands on her lap. The girl, like so many others, had a hurtful past that she refused to speak of, so Raleigh changed the subject.

"Hey, Raleigh!" Snapping back to the moment at hand, Raleigh acknowledged Autumn as she tried to get her attention.

"What?"

"Welcome back to the land of the living. You coming? We have Cooper's lesson in ten minutes."

"Oh, yeah." Raleigh grabbed her bag and books and headed out to the main school building with Autumn. They only had a little less than two weeks left of school and Raleigh couldn't have been happier. She was so excited about going home she could hardly contain it. She had even been contemplating asking Dan if he'd like to go back to Shelby with her. She wanted him to see what a real family Christmas was like since he hadn't known one in years.

All week she knew she'd been stealing glances at him, and Autumn warned her that some people were beginning to notice, especially since nearly everyday Dan found a reason for her to stay after class. But she couldn't care less. She was young and in love and if people didn't like it, too bad for them.

When class was over, Raleigh told Autumn to go ahead, she'd meet up with them for lunch later on. After every student was out of the classroom, Raleigh sashayed up to Dan's desk, not wasting anytime in pulling him down for a head spinning kiss. She found that the longer she waited to touch him, the crazier she got about wanting to. She knew they were being careless and it was only a matter of time before they were caught, but Raleigh had a one track mind when it came to him.

And with the way he was holding her and kissing her back, Dan apparently did too.

Finally pulling away, Dan refused to release his hold on her. "I've been wanting to do that all day."

"Me too." After staring into his eyes for a moment, Raleigh finally gained the strength to look away and back up. Taking his hands in her own, she met his gaze once again. "Listen, I've been thinking."

"Oh really? I hope you didn't hurt yourself."

"Shut up!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. What's up?"

"Well, You know that I have to go home for Christmas since I didn't go for Thanksgiving."

"Yeah." What was she getting at?

"Well, I was thinking that, maybe you'd like to come with me. I know that you have Leslie and you probably don't want to leave her alone for the holiday so if you don't want to I completely understand."

Silencing her babbling with a finger on her lips, Dan lowered his head closer to hers.

"I'd love to come home with you for Christmas."

A slow smile began to form on her lips and Raleigh could hardly contain her excitement. She felt like she'd just been given the best Christmas present ever.

"Really?"

"Yes. Really." Then he leaned down to capture her lips once again, not even bothering to look around to see if there were any spying eyes.

If they had, they would have noticed the man standing in the doorway, eyes narrowing with fury.

---

Pacing back and forth in his bedroom, the young man ran his fingers through his messy hair for the hundredth time in the past two minutes.

How could she do this to him? Didn't she care at all?

Of course not. He had just been some ploy to pass the time for her. Just a stupid toy waiting to be discarded when she'd had her fill of fun. She'd used him. She told him she wasn't toying with his emotions like a lost puppy, that she truly cared for him. And of course, like the idiot that he was he'd chosen to believe her.

Surely she wouldn't lie to him like that, straight to his face?

But she had. All because she wanted to go get laid.

God, I'm such an idiot! That stupid bitch never cared about me or my feelings.

He'd never felt such a rage like this before. What was he going to do? What could he do? It was obvious she'd chosen who she wanted. Maybe that was a game to her too. After all, she did have that pretty boy back in New York. Was everything just a game to her?

No, he knew better. He had just been a game. But she wouldn't get away with it that easily.

That little bitch is going to pay.

Yelling

Screaming.

The woman was screaming. For help, desperate for anyone to hear her screams.

She was scared, there was no denying that. But why was she so scared? He couldn't make out what she was screaming, he couldn't even see who she was. It was as though he were encased in blackness. He couldn't even see his own hand right in front of his face.

Where was he? Who was the frightened woman?

Then he heard a loud smack, followed by another voice. An angry voice.

A man's voice.

Now he understood.

Finding his bearings, Dan moved through the black hallways, trying desperately to find where this guy had this woman hidden. Just what was he putting her through to get these awful, blood curdling screams from her? Did he even want to find out?

Finally, after what seemed like hours of aimless running, Dan realized the frantic screams were growing louder, nearer. He could now begin to make out what she was saying.

"No, please, don't do this!"

"Shut up!"

"Let me go!"

The man let out a yelp. "Son of a bitch, get back down!" Dan heard another loud scream and a thump. He knew he'd hit her again, this time causing her to fall to the floor.

"Why are you doing this?" Her voice was quiet, obviously trying to control her sobs.

"Because. He can't have you. He doesn't love you like I do, why won't you see that? Why do you keep fighting me?"

Dan heard the sob inevitably come out as she whispered one more, "please" to the relentless attacker. He knew that voice.

Who is she?

He knew. Damn it, he could swear that he knew that voice. Why wouldn't it click in his brain?

It finally did when she began screaming once again. He was unable to move. Unable to breathe, or even think. He now knew who it was that was being tortured so badly.

Oh God, he was going to be sick.

"Dan...Dan!" Starting awake, Dan gasped for breath. Was he still dreaming? He could still hear the voices, the screaming, the frantic pleas for help.

All from Raleigh's mouth.

Oh God.

Jumping up from the bed, Dan leapt to his feet and ran to the bathroom, spilling his guts into the toilet.

When vomit finally stopped pouring from his mouth, Dan sat down, leaning his head against the cool tiles of the wall. Had that really been just a dream? It had seemed so real. Felt so real. Too real.

Dan felt someone press a cold wash cloth to his face, causing him to open his eyes.

Raleigh.

She sat before him, wearing only his t-shirt that was too big for her. Her hair was disheveled from sleeping, but she still managed to look gorgeous.

Who could ever want to hurt her?

She stared at him with her wide, lilac eyes, obviously worried about him.

"Are you all right?"

Swallowing down the taste of bile and vomit, Dan nodded. "I'm fine."

"Waking up from an obvious nightmare in a cold sweat just to run to the bathroom to puke your guts up? Yeah, I'd be fine too." He caught the strong sarcasm in her voice, and though he knew he deserved it, at the moment it wasn't really appreciated. But she was right. He was definitely not all right. Anything but. He couldn't get past the screams, the begging...

The sound of that guy forcing himself on her while she sobbed.

"Dan..."

"I'm gonna clean up in here. Take a shower." He forced a laugh before looking around. "The smell of puke isn't all that flattering." He saw Raleigh's eyes harden as she looked at him.

He realized she wanted him to confide in her and tell her what his nightmare had been about, but he couldn't just come out and say that he'd dreamed of her getting tortured and raped. What kind of freak would she think he was?

Standing up, Raleigh set the wash cloth on the sink, mumbled that she'd be downstairs, and left, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

As she put on her pajama bottoms, Raleigh tried to swallow the hurt she suddenly felt. Why couldn't he trust her enough to tell her what the nightmare had been about? It had quite obviously shaken him. Why did he feel like he had to weigh the burden alone? After brushing her hair, Raleigh went downstairs and into the kitchen to fix herself something to eat.

Deciding on simple and easy, she grabbed the cheerios and poured herself a bowl before going into the living room and turning on the television. She turned on repeats of Saved By The Bell and settled into the couch, eating her breakfast. When the credits were rolling on the second episode, Raleigh began wondering what Dan was doing and if he really was all right. If he had woken up like that, the dream must have really gotten to him. She couldn't swallow down the worry she felt for him, but the anger she felt certainly outweighed the worry.

Why didn't he trust her? Was it a control type thing? Did he feel like if he opened up and told her the dream really had upset him would he feel like less of a man? Like he was weak?

No matter his reasoning, Raleigh was still upset.

Seeing that it was now nearly nine o'clock, Raleigh stood up and put her bowl in the kitchen sink. Going back upstairs, she dressed and sat on the bed, waiting for Dan to emerge from the bathroom.

Good lord he took longer in the bathroom than a woman.

Finally after a few more minutes, he came out of the bathroom, towel around his waist and his hair wet and clinging to his head. God did he ever look sexy. She sat there, legs and arms crossed, just watching as he went to his dresser, pulled out some clothes and went back into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. Not once did he look at her or even acknowledge her presence.

A few minutes later he opened the door again, fully clothed this time. As she stared at him, she knew he was fighting with himself. Whether to look at her or tell her what was going on up in that gorgeous head of his, she didn't know. When he gave in and actually met her gaze, his face was hard and he spoke sternly. What he said was the last thing she had ever expected to come from his mouth.

"I don't want you to go to that party tonight."

Sitting there stunned for a moment, Raleigh just let it sink in what he had just said. "And why the hell not?"

"I have my reasons. I don't want you anywhere near there tonight, Raleigh."

Laughing incredulously, Raleigh stood up and walked towards him a few steps. "Well too damn bad. You can't tell me what to do and you're seriously delusional if you think I'm going to let you."

Sighing, Dan closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. She noticed he always did that when he was annoyed or worried. Which was he right now?

She'd bet on annoyed.

"Look, Raleigh, I don't mean to sound like an asshole and I'm not trying to tell you what to do. Please, do not go to this party."

Ok, maybe it was the worried pinch.

"What's going on, Dan?"

"Nothing I just don't want you there. I guess I just have a bad feeling about it."

Shaking her head, Raleigh finally put two and two together. "This is about your dream isn't it? Something happened to me." Putting her hands on either side of his face, Raleigh told him, "Dan, it was just a dream. I'll be fine."

Grabbing her hands, Dan lowered them. "I know it was just a dream. But I still don't want you there."

Backing away a little, Raleigh shook her head. "Dan this is my last night to hang out and have fun with my friends. I'm not going to not go."

"You mean this is the last night you can party and get wasted on drugs and alcohol." He hadn't meant to let that slip out, but now that it had he just wanted to punch himself in the face. The way she looked at him, he knew he'd struck a chord.

Staring at Dan with disbelief in what he'd just said, Raleigh felt herself itching to slap him. And she would have had it not stung so bad the first time. Turning around, she grabbed her purse off the bed and headed out the door.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm leaving." She said simply, not offering any other explanation as she went down the stairs.

"Raleigh," Catching up to her right before she reached the front door, Dan grabbed her arm causing her to turn on him, wrenching it away from his grasp.

"Don't touch me."

"Raleigh, look."

"No! You look. I went through a relationship once where he tried to tell me what to do. I won't do it again. I don't have to listen to this shit. I'll do whatever the hell I want." With that, she wrenched open the door, slamming it shut behind her.

Who the hell did he think he was? She was a big girl, she could do whatever she damn well pleased. She'd partied with these people a bunch of times over the past semester, what did he think was really going to happen? Sure she'd been planning on having a few drinks and letting herself go a little, but not to the point he apparently thought she would. Did he have no faith in her? She did have some self control, regardless of what he so obviously thought.

She could go the entire night without doing even one line of coke with everyone. She wasn't addicted. Was she?

No. It was just fun to let loose after having her every move watched back home. Mommy and Daddy weren't in LA to control her life, why would Dan think she'd allow him to?

She wasn't so sure that's even what he was doing. He did look thoroughly worried. But it was just dream. Dreams don't come true. That'd be like saying fairy tales came true.

She was too old to believe in fairy tales. And dreams were meant for sleeping. That was that.

Feeling her phone vibrate against her leg, Raleigh pulled it out of her pocket and looked at the caller ID. Seeing that it was Dan she immediately hit "ignore" and put it back where it had been. There was nothing he could say to her that just wouldn't enrage her further.

Finally reaching the dormitory, Raleigh ran upstairs and straight into the shower, not even acknowledging Autumn. She knew she was being rude, but at that point in time she couldn't care less.

As she stood there, allowing the scalding water to wash away her aches and pains, Raleigh tried not to burst into tears. Had she been wrong about him? Was he just like James, wanting to control her every move, only pretending to really, truly care at first? While part of her wanted to believe he was different, she couldn't deny what had just happened. He told her not to go to the party.

But he said he wasn't trying to tell her what to do. He'd just had a bad feeling. Because of the dream. The dream that had gotten to him so badly that it made him sick.

Just what had he dreamt had happened to her? Had it really been that bad and graphic?

As she continued to stand there, under the cooling water, Raleigh began to feel herself softening. He really did seem worried about her. Really worried. What if somehow he had seen what the near future would bring?

No. It had just been a dream. Dreams don't come true. She'd hung out and partied with her classmates quite a few times. She'd be fine.

It finally registering that the water had gone ice cold, Raleigh turned it off and stepped out, wrapping the towel around herself. Seeing that she hadn't grabbed any clothes when she came in, she opened the bathroom door and went out into the room, straight to her dresser.

"Bad morning?" Glancing at Autumn, Raleigh tried to not let her annoyance show.

"Yeah, you could say that." After grabbing some clean clothes, Raleigh went back into the bathroom and dressed. When she was finished she ran a brush through her wet hair and then sat on her bed. As she pulled her boots on over her socks she could feel Autumn staring at her. She knew she was dying to say something, to ask what had happened between the love birds. Sighing, Raleigh turned and faced her roommate.

"What?"

"Nothing." Autumn shrugged before looking back to the T.V. "If you want to tell me what happened you know I'm always here to listen. But I'm not going to ask."

Standing up, Raleigh grabbed her sweater and threw it on. "I know, and when I want to talk I will come to you."

"Where are you going?"

"What do I usually do when I need to clear my head?"

"You go walking."

"Yep. I'll see you a little later."

"Hey, have you been to the Hollywood sign yet?"

Thinking back on her time in LA, Raleigh was surprised to realize she had yet to visit the sign. There was so much she'd been missing out on there. "You know what? No, I haven't."

"You should go. Have something to tell everyone back home."

"Maybe I will. I'll see you later."

Where had that come from? Was there a hidden meaning behind her words?

"Raleigh, you are becoming far too paranoid." Just because Dan had a screwed up dream, that had left her a little more distressed than she'd admit, was no reason to suspect her own friends of hidden agendas. But still, she found herself steering clear of the route to the sign. Instead, she found herself sitting in a park, watching ducks fish for food in the river. It was quiet and peaceful there which was just what she needed. For once she was able to just sit there and think. Maybe write a song. She hadn't written a song that wasn't for an assignment since she left Shelby forest at the end of the summer. She missed being able to just sit back and get all her emotions and thoughts out and onto paper, creating a killer song.

Like Halo.

That had been the easiest song she'd ever written, and in her opinion, the best she'd ever written. It was pure emotion that conveyed a powerful message.

As Raleigh sat there, thinking back on the past thirteen years, she had to will the tears away. She missed home now more than ever. Why had she come here, why had she ever left? Why did Josh leave her? Her life had changed more in the past year than she wanted to accept. Could she ever go back? Back to the way things used to be? Back to working at the Landing, performing her songs for the people she loved, and then some? Back to being careless and reckless with all of her friends. Back to drinking at the field then jumping into the swimming hole for a game of chicken that always left at least one of them hurt.

Back to Josh.

She could remember the exact moment she'd become his girlfriend so clearly. They'd been so in love but so young.

It was recess at school, he was a second grader, she a first. She sat on the tire swing with Carly, giggling madly because Owen had fallen and broken his glasses when Bobbie stuck out his foot. Owen stood up and, becoming red in the face from every one of his fellow classmates howling in laughter at him, he immediately let his fist fly, punching Bobbie square in the nose. Bobbie had then begun howling with tears streaming down his face, crying out for his mommy.

"Serves you right, Bobbie!" Raleigh yelled to her mischievous twin.

"Nice hit, Owen." The girls giggled more when Owen's freckle-filled face turned an even deeper shade of crimson and he turned away to follow Mrs. Anderson to the principal's office. He didn't get into too much trouble, it had after all been Bobbie's fault.

Anyway, there she sat, clad in her jean overall shorts, pink t-shirt, frilly socks and pig-tails, and Josh couldn't take his eyes off her. He heard his friend Joey had asked a girl if she loved him and if she wanted to be his girlfriend. He didn't exactly know how it went, but he did know that he wanted Raleigh to be his girlfriend.

He tried to work up the courage all through recess to approach her, but he just couldn't. so finally when they were back in their separate classrooms, he wrote her a note. When they got off the school bus later that day, Josh tapped her on the shoulder. He had fully planned on saying something to her, but as soon as she turned and gave him that adorable smile of hers, all thoughts went from his mind. He threw the note into her hand and ran away towards his home.

Watching Josh run away, Raleigh felt herself sadden. Why wouldn't he talk to her? But something was different. He had put a note in her hand this time.

Unfolding the piece of paper, she read the words written. Her spirits lifted instantly.

Do you love me? Do you want to be my friend?
If you do, well then don't be afraid to take me by the hand if you want to.
I think this is how love goes.
Check:
Yes or No
Josh

When she got home she made a single mark on the paper and folded it back up, setting it carefully in her folder with her homework.
When tomorrow finally came, Raleigh waited until they got off the morning bus and she went over to him. After handing him the note, she placed a soft kiss on his cheek before skipping away to her classroom with Carly.

When he opened the note and saw the single circle surrounding the "yes", he couldn't stop the happy yelp from coming out of his mouth. Raleigh was his girlfriend. He'd never been happier.

Ever since that day they'd been together. Did she really want to end, completely end them, over Christmas break? Would it be a mistake to take Dan with her? She wanted to spend the holiday with him, she wanted him to have a real Christmas again. But she knew it was tradition for the Chasez and the Coons families to get together on Christmas Eve. How would Josh react if he saw her there with him? Of course she'd tell him before hand, but she was so afraid to hurt him. The hurt and betrayal she'd felt when he sent her that letter was still fresh in her mind. Could she really do that to him?

Hearing the familiar beat of Jamie Dunlap's "Down on Love" coming from her pocket, Raleigh reached for it and looked at the screen. When she saw Dan's smiling face peering up at her she contemplated hitting "talk" and apologizing for blowing up at him earlier. But she just wasn't ready to admit that he had her wondering if she really should go to the party tonight.

"This is ridiculous." hitting "ignore", Raleigh put the phone back in her pocket and relaxed back against the bench.

"Angry with someone?" At first her entire body tensed up with fear at the sound of the voice. But then she realized it was only Effron.

"Hey, you scared me."

"Sorry." He gave her his killer smile and sat down beside her.

"It's all right."

"So, what sorry sod pissed you off today? Lover boy perhaps?" She noted the resentment in his voice and wondered how much she should say.

"Uh, not so much pissed off as annoyed. He doesn't want me to go to the party tonight." Ok, so maybe she would just let him believe she was talking about Josh. It'd be better than telling him it was Mr. Cooper. "He says he has a bad feeling about it."

"What a crock of shit."

"I know. I'm a big girl now. I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself."

"Indeed."

"but I think I do need to talk to him. I feel horrible for just blowing up at him and walking out this morning."

"Walked out?" He raised an eyebrow at her never before had she wanted to swallow her own fist so badly.

You fucking idiot!

"Uh...I meant..." Just mumble incoherently. That won't tip him off at all.

"You mean you've been sleeping with someone behind Mr. Perfect's back. Aside from me."

Looking down at her nervously twisting hands, Raleigh tried to think up something to say. "I wouldn't say I'm sleeping with you. I mean, it's been a while and..."

"You said you wouldn't do that." She felt her eyes snap to look at his face. His voice was so full of anger, his eyes not much better as they bored into her skull.

"Do what?" Raleigh wracked her brain, searching for the slightest clue to even hint at what he meant.

"You know what!" He snapped at her, causing her to shrink back from him subconsciously.

"Effron..."

"Just shut up, Raleigh." He shook his head and stood up, walking away briskly.

"What the hell just happened?" If she'd felt confused before, she certainly was now. What had she done to him to make him lash out at her with such anger like that?

Suddenly very aware of the darkening sky, Raleigh wrapped her arms around herself as she stood up and made her way to exit the park. Storms in LA were not something to take lightly, especially if the sky was getting so dark so quickly. She got to the dorm just as rain began pouring from the sky.

As she stood there watching the buckets of rain splashing against the glass doors, Raleigh felt herself shiver. "at least you held out for me."

Going back up to the dorm, Raleigh wasn't all that surprised to find Ember over. She was however, very surprised to see that they were watching a video of her performance at the beginning of summer back home.

"Where did you get this?"

"I was looking through your DVD's trying to find a movie to watch and I found this. It was just labeled "summer concert" so we were curious."

"Raleigh, I knew you were good at performing with Rent and all, but seeing you at home, doing your thing with your own music...I have no clue what you're doing here at the academy. You should have gotten a record deal years ago." That was a huge compliment coming from Ember, and Raleigh truly appreciated it.

"Wow, Ember, thanks."

"Seriously, Ray. You're stuff is amazing. A lot better than most of the shit that's on the radio now. And damn is that boy fine."

Looking at the TV Raleigh saw that she was beginning to perform "Never Gone." The song she'd written for her grandmother. And Autumn was talking about James.

"I just write what I feel. And James may be nice to look at, but he's a real asshole."

"You two seem to be pretty cozy up there."

"Yeah, before Josh and I started hanging out again and he showed his true colors."

"How is Josh?" Autumn used caution while asking. She knew that subject was beginning to be a difficult one for Raleigh.

"I don't really know actually. Kinda been avoiding his calls."

"Ray, that's terrible! Have you even spoken to him since he went back to New York?"

"Of course I have!" She defended herself, then grew silent. Autumn knew there was more going on with her friend than she knew about, she only wished she'd let her in a little to help her.

"Raleigh, what's going on?"

"Yeah, you were so in love with him. What gives?"

Sighing, Raleigh turned off the television and sat down with the girls.

"I've been seeing someone. And honestly I'm beginning to fall for him. Hard. We had our first fight this morning and now I just want to run over there and say how sorry I am. He's been calling and I keep ignoring him. I feel so terrible."

"Love will do that to you"

Sitting there in silence for a moment, Raleigh stood up abruptly and went to the window, watching the storm. "I just want to have a good time tonight. Forget about the drama in my life just for one night.

"Then we will." Ember said, standing up herself.

Looking at the clock hanging on the wall, Autumn swore. "Shit, it's later than I thought. We gotta get ready and head over to the house to set up."

Ember went back to her room and got ready while Autumn showered and Raleigh began curling her hair. Before putting on her dress, Raleigh added her make-up and tweezed a few stray eyebrow hairs.

Finally, Raleigh grabbed her dress and took it off the hanger. It was strapless, silk, and rose colored, falling a few inches above her knee. There was a black, sort of transparent cloth, covering the waist with black roses embroidered in it. After zipping it up in the back, Raleigh put on her black, diamond encrusted, necklace and matching bracelet, followed by her shoes. As she was switching purses - to a smaller black one - Autumn finally emerged from the bathroom, hair and make-up completely done. After she grabbed her dress she went back into the bathroom and put it on, asking Raleigh to help her with the zipper on the back.

Her dress was floor length, halter, silk, and navy blue. Her long, now only blond, hair was held up loosely with a few diamond encrusted clips with a few tendrils falling loosely around her face. Looking at herself in the mirror, Raleigh wondered if this was how celebrities lived. No matter what the occasion, the rich always seemed to dress formally.

"Let's go." After they went down the hall to get Ember they got a cab and drove to where the party was taking place.

"So where exactly is the party?"

"Oh, it was supposed to be at my parents' country club but they were afraid we were going to trash it so it's at my grandfather's house instead."

"You're parents were afraid of trashing their club but not your grandfather's home?"

"Nope. He died two years and they never go there so its almost always empty. Except for the maid they pay to keep it in good condition. Plus he was the biggest prick on the face of the planet so my mom just doesn't really care."

"Oh." Raleigh didn't think she' d ever be able to do that in her Grams' house. But then again she wasn't raised like Autumn and she hadn't known her grandfather.

As soon as they got to the house Raleigh's mouth it the ground. The house was enormous and nicely hidden behind a tall fence and quite a few large trees. It was completely lit up with icicle lights and adorned with beautiful decorations. Once they were inside, Raleigh was even more impressed. A large white Christmas tree was in the living room and various other decorations occupied other spots in the house. This maid they pay was very good at her job.

The girls went straight into the kitchen and began laying out the food, plates, cups, and alcohol.

"You're parents don't care that you party like this?"

"They know I'm going to do whatever the hell I want anyway so they rather it be where they can keep an eye on me. But never once since my grandfather died have they been here. Plus too, who do you think bought all the alcohol?"

Raleigh found it funny how different some people were raised. Her parents would have a coronary if they knew she was here.

Once they were satisfied with how everything looked, Ember took the liberty of getting them each a very strong cup of electric lemonade.

"To freedom." Autumn toasted, and Raleigh couldn't agree more.

Within the half hour people began showing up and Raleigh was trying her best to relax a little. She knew her cell phone was ringing non stop - no doubt it was Dan - but she didn't really want to answer it. She didn't want to tell him that, even though she was actually getting more nervous every time someone showed up, she had gone to the party and would see it through to the end. Whether to prove a point to him or herself that nothing was going to happen, she didn't know.

"This is ridiculous." She mumbled to herself. Nothing was going to happen. She just needed to relax some.

Going into the kitchen and to the counter where all the liquor was, Raleigh poured herself a double shot of Jose Cuervo, threw her head back, and swallowed the burning liquid. She didn't even bother with the salt or lime.

After the party was in full swing and had been for over an hour, Raleigh finally felt herself begin to relax. She even found herself dancing and having a good time. Why had she been so paranoid? Nothing was going to happen.

Hearing Autumn call her name, Raleigh forgot about the guy she'd been dancing with and plopped down on the couch with them.

"Hey Davey."

"Raleigh." He nodded before leaning forward and holding out the small tube for her to take. "Ready to fly?"

Shaking her head, Raleigh said, "Not tonight." She needed to keep some sense of control.

Autumn turned to her and took the tube from Davey. "Come on Raleigh. You said you wanted to forget all the drama."

She did and she knew this was the best way to do that. She knew it would put her into that state of complete euphoria where she didn't have care in the world. That's what she wanted. She didn't want to keep dwelling on her current problems, she didn't want to keep thinking about Josh and Dan or the pain she might put on both of them.

She just didn't want to feel.

That's why she took the tube from Autumn, held it to her left nostril, pinched the right one closed and quickly inhaled two small lines of the white powder she'd come to know as her friend. Raleigh welcomed the immediate feeling of relaxation that swept over her. Already she could feel the effects wracking her body, taking her to that high place she never wanted to leave.

But it wasn't enough. She needed more.

Just as she was about to sit up and say so, Effron walked in. The look he gave her made her realize she definitely needed more.

"Eff, my man! Come and join the party." Davey stood up and gave Effron a half hand-shake, half hug before they both sat down and did two lines each. Automatically Effron sniffed and wiped at his nose.

Looking at Raleigh, Autumn somehow knew she needed more - a lot more - if she was going to make it through the night. Separating a few more lines, Autumn let Raleigh go first, not surprised when she snorted two.

Looking at everyone, Raleigh said she needed a drink and went into the kitchen. As she went straight over to the liquor, Raleigh could feel Effron behind her, watching her. But she didn't care. After how he acted earlier she didn't really want to speak with him.

Throwing her head back, Raleigh swallowed the liquid, immediately pouring herself another. After drinking that one, she sighed and turned around to face him. She couldn't stand feeling his eyes on her, not saying a word. Putting her hand on her hip, Raleigh gave him a look as if you say "what do you want?"

"Can we talk?"

"No." Grabbing her cup, Raleigh gave him one more defiant look before leaving him there by himself. How was she supposed to talk to him? What could she possibly talk to him about? Normally she'd ask him what the hell his problem had been earlier in the park, but she just didn't feel like it. Her limbs were beginning to feel like jello and her head swam from the alcohol. She was getting up there, she could feel it. But still, it just wasn't enough. She needed more. She needed to get to that point of intoxication where she didn't think twice about anything. Where she wouldn't remember anything the next morning. Where she wouldn't remember anything that night. Just once she wanted to forget the drama, was that so much to ask for?

She was eighteen years old. Why was her life already so complicated?

"You look like you could use another." Looking up, Raleigh saw Ember holding out a tube to her, looking pointedly at the table. She looked longingly at the white lines and for a split second her conscious kicked in. She knew she shouldn't. She'd done a lot already. But it just seemed to call to her. The drug was intoxicating. She didn't want to stop.

Maybe she was addicted. Maybe the only way she'd be able to stop herself was if she went into to rehab.

No, she wouldn't think about that. She was just having a good time. Just having fun. She was a college student. Wasn't that what they did?

Not allowing another thought to enter her mind, Raleigh took the tube from Ember and allowed the drug entry into her body, mixing with the drugs and alcohol already there.

Yes, there it was. The high she wanted, it finally came, ten fold. This drug must have been new. She'd never known a feeling like this before. How had Davey described it? Like flying. Yes, she felt like she was no longer walking, but floating on air.

She felt like if she jumped off the roof of the very large house right then she would be able to fly. Like she could just go away with the birds to a beautiful place that she'd never forget.

As she stumbled into the kitchen, She noticed her cup was empty once again. She needed more lemonade. It was so good. It reminded her of jungle juice. Once back home at a party everyone brought some sort of beverage, whether it was alcohol or not, it didn't matter, and they dumped it all into a large cooler and they called it jungle juice. Very intoxicating but insanely good.

Going over to the cooler, Raleigh put her cup under the spout and pressed the button. Frowning when nothing happened, Raleigh tried again. Still nothing.

"Come on!" She hit it in case it was jammed or something, but still nothing. "Damn you, I want more!"

"I think it's all gone, Raleigh." Turning around, Raleigh locked eyes with Effron.

"I'm aware of that."

"All right." She watched him go over to the counter with all the alcohol on it and she watched him mix together some sort of concoction. His body was in the way so she wasn't sure what he was putting in it, but as long as it had a lot of alcohol in it, it was fine by her.

She watched as he finished the drink and turned around, stalking toward her while he held the plastic cup out. "Try this, I promise you'll like it."

She couldn't quite gauge the look on his face as he looked at her. He looked as if something were wrong with him. There was just something in his eyes that made him look like a madman, but most of all he just looked down right pissed off.

At her.

What had she done? Reaching out to take the cup, Raleigh felt something creep up into her mind. She shouldn't take the drink, she knew she shouldn't. But damn it if she could refuse. She wanted more, she felt like she needed more. So she took it.

Putting it to her lips, Raleigh began sipping the drink, trying to get a taste for what it was. Just as Effron had promised she liked it, in fact it was delicious.

"What is this? It's so good."

"Just a secret recipe." He said distractedly, watching as she gulped down the rest. When it was all gone, Raleigh set down the cup and let out a very loud, very un lady-like burp.

"Excuse me, but that was really good." She took a few steps and nearly fell over. She would have fallen right to the floor if Effron hadn't been standing there to catch her.

"Whoa, where do you think you're going?"

"Upstairs to pee. That a crime?" Raleigh pushed him away from her as best as she could in her drunken state and slowly headed up the stairs to find a bathroom. She knew there were two downstairs but one was already covered in puke and the other...well she wasn't too keen on planting her rear-end where so many others had been.

After about ten minutes of slowly wandering the halls of the mansion, she finally managed to find one very large bathroom. When she was done doing her business she went back into the hallway and nearly fell head-first into the wall. Out of nowhere she'd been hit with an incredibly strong wave of dizziness.

"Oh God, I need to lie down." Going through the first door she came to, she felt incredibly relieved to see a large bed sitting to her right, just calling her to fall into its silk sheets. Going over to it, that's just what she did. She didn't even bother to take off her shoes, she just fell right down onto the fluffy blankets. As she lied there, she could feel herself slowly slipping into unconsciousness. All she wanted was sleep to overtake her entire body.

Along with Dan.

She missed him so much. Why had she come here when she could be in his arms? Why had she flipped out on him when he was just trying to protect her?

Why was she fighting the fact that she was so in love with him it hurt being apart?

She wanted to call him, needed to see him. She needed to move so she could go down and get her phone. She tried to will her arms and legs to move but they wouldn't. Why wouldn't they move?

Suddenly she felt something on her leg, starting at her foot and slowly moving up. At first Raleigh thought she was dreaming, but then she felt soft kisses on her neck, hot breath on her ear. The touch was everywhere, she couldn't escape it. But she knew it. It felt so familiar.

"Beautiful Raleigh." It wasn't until she heard his husky voice that she fully knew who it was. His accent, that she'd once thought of as sexy, was thick with the alcohol and drugs in his system, but it was laced with something else. Something that frightened her. Lust.

And power.

He had a power over her, an advantage, and he knew it.

Finally opening her eyes, Raleigh became fully aware of what was happening. And just where he was touching her.

"What are you doing?" She choked out in a whisper.

"Whatever I want." He kissed her then, hard, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. She tried tyo fight him off but she couldn't. He was so much stronger than she was. Finally he broke the kiss and moved to push the skirt of her dress up to her hips, tugging off her black lace panties.

Wiggling, Raleigh tried to break free of his grasp. "No..." She didn't want this. She didn't want him.

When he threw her provocative panties off to the side somewhere, he quickly set his hips on top of her own, pinning her to the mattress. She tried to push him away with her fists but he grabbed both wrists and with one hand he pinned them above her head. He was going to get what he wanted one way or another.

"Stop fighting me!" Using only his right hand, Effron reached down and unbuckled his belt. Pulling it off and discarding it in the room, he then moved to unbutton and unzip his pants, pulling himself free. As he lowered himself onto her, he ran his tongue along her bottom lip, grating his hips into hers, but not entering her. He wanted this to last as long as possible.

"Effron, please. Don't do this." She begged him as tears poured form her eyes, soaking her hair. She'd never felt fear like this. How long was he planning on torturing her? Why hadn't she listened to Dan?

"I'll do whatever the hell I want with you, Raleigh. That's what you always do, isn't it? You just have fun toying with people's emotions. You fuck them and toss them aside while you move on." Putting his face right next to hers, Effron watched the fear in her eyes as he slowly added pressure to her neck, ever more slightly cutting off her air supply. "Now, I'm just having fun."

As soon as he put his mouth on hers once again, Raleigh but down on his lip as hard as she could, not stopping until she tasted his blood on her tongue.

"Son of a bitch!" Sitting up so now only her hips were pinned to the bed, Effron ran his fingers along his lip. As soon as he saw the blood, he looked back at Raleigh who was trying desperately to free herself. Grabbing her hands and pinning them back above her head, Effron grabbed onto her hair, forcing her to look at him. "Stop fighting me!" Reaching across, Effron back handed her across the face. He knew he'd hit her hard but he hadn't expected his hand to throb so badly.

Raleigh cried out in pain and let out a fresh bout of tears as her body shook from her sobs. Why was he doing this to her?

"Please just let me go."

Grabbing her chin, Effron forced her to look at him once again. "No." Staring into her blood shot eyes, the left one slowly swelling shut, he continued to speak. But gone was the sweet and caring Effron she had first met. Now all that remained was a lunatic in his place.

"I liked you Raleigh. Hell, I even thought I loved you."

"Effron..."

"Shut up, Raleigh! Just keep that pretty mouth of yours shut for once in your life and maybe I won't hurt you anymore." Doing as he said, Raleigh kept her mouth shut in fear of what he might be capable of doing to her. She couldn't handle it if he hit her again, the first time had hurt so bad.

"Why did you leave me, huh? And for him of all people! I mean, he's our teacher!" He let out a maniacal laugh and Raleigh wondered how he'd known about her hidden relationship.

"How..."

"Shut up! I'm doing the talking!" Reaching back, Effron backhanded her once again, this time splitting her lip open. He couldn't stop the sadistic laughter as it escaped his throat. "I told you not to fuck with me, didn't I?"

Raleigh didn't respond. She couldn't have if she wanted to,. Her face was throbbing as she fought not to pass out. Maybe she should pass out. Then she wouldn't know what he did to her.

She felt his body shift and the next thing she knew her was parting her legs, sliding in between them.

"Please stop." She cried as he forcibly entered her, smiling at the cry of pain she released.

"No."

Laying there on the bed, Raleigh cried in defeat and pain. She was no virgin, why did this hurt so bad?

She wished she were anywhere else. Anywhere except right there, lying motionless as Effron continued to rape her, contaminating her. Even hell couldn't have been as bad as enduring what he was putting her through.

No. She couldn't let him keep doing this. She had to fight him off somehow. Trying to gain some courage, Raleigh took in a deep breath before throwing her head forward, colliding it with his. Immediately, he released her from his hold as his hands flew to his head.

The pain Raleigh now felt was excruciating, but she didn't care. All she cared about was getting the hell out of that house and away from Effron. Scrambling off the bed, Raleigh didn't bother with putting her shoes or panties back on. She had to get out. Running downstairs, she grabbed her phone out of her purse that sat in Autumn's old bedroom - nobody was allowed down that wing - and she ran out the door and into the pouring rain.

Looking at her phone, she saw she had ten missed calls from Dan and three from Bobbie. Had he tapped into that twin psychie thing she always heard so much about and just knew she was in trouble?

Why hadn't she listened to Dan?

Hitting call, Raleigh waited while the phone dialed Dan's number.

"Raleigh?" She heard his worried voice come over the line and she felt the tears fall harder and mix with the rain on her cheeks.

"Dan..."

"Jesus, Raleigh! Do you have any idea how worried I've been?"

"Please don't yell at me." She whispered pleadingly.

"Raleigh, what happened? Are you all right?"

"No." More sobs racked her body as she tried to keep walking. "I should have listened..." Suddenly Raleigh could feel the blackness as it swept over her entire body. Something was wrong. The rain felt icy against her skin as she began to burn. What was going on?

Quickly, Raleigh told Dan her location as her voice began to fail her. "Corner...Main and West fifty-second...please..." Before she could say anything more, she felt her phone drop form her loosening grasp and fall to the ground. She felt herself slipping further into the darkness. She felt herself hit the hard wet ground. And then nothing.

No pain, no fear...just nothing.

---

"Raleigh?" When she didn't respond he called her name out again. Again nothing but the sound of the rain pounding on the ground.

"West fifty-second and Main." He mumbled to himself as he grabbed his keys and ran out to his car. He knew exactly where she was. He'd passed the large house many times before, and he didn't care how they got in to throw this party. He didn't even care what had happened to her. All he cared about was finding her and getting her to the emergency room. He'd worry about the rest later.

"Come on! Are you fucking kidding me? Go the fucking speed limit, old timer!" Seeing that there was nobody coming on the other side of the road, Dan hit the accelerator and sped past the old man. Finally he came to Main Street and he continued to drive down until the large, border-line mansion came into view.

Pulling over, Dan felt his breath catch in his throat when his eyes landed on Raleigh lying unconscious on the ground, rain pooling around her.

"No, no, no." Dan quickly ran to her side to feel for a pulse. He'd never felt a fear like this before. He couldn't lose her, not after everything they'd been through. He'd never forgive himself.

"What happened?"

"I...I don't know." He stuttered, trying to wrap his mind around what was happening. "she was at a party and she called me to pick her up. When I got there she was passed out on the sidewalk."

"She's burning up, doctor. Her temperature is 106.6."

"Get her back to ICU, try to get her temperature down. Ice her if you have to." Turning back to Dan, the doctor made him look at him. "Has she ingested any drugs tonight?"

"I don't know. If anything, probably cocaine."

The older man sighed before beginning to turn away. "All right. I need you to go over to that desk and fill out as much information as you can on her." Unable to speak anymore, Dan just nodded and went over to the front desk as told.

"Can I help you?" The older woman sitting there asked.

"Yeah. I just brought a young woman in. He said I needed to fill out some paper work."

"All right." Grabbing a clipboard with a few papers on it, the woman handed it to him. "I need your information and relationship with the patient here, and her information and insurance down here."

"Ok."

"Take your time, sweetie."

Sitting down on the uncomfortable waiting room chair, Dan tried to focus on the papers in front of him but he just couldn't. Had she overdosed? Is that why she had passed out and was suffering a severe fever? What if they couldn't get it down? Would it cause permanent brain damage like he knew it could?

Oh God. What if I was too late?

He had to know what happened. Maybe Autumn would know. After all, she had been there.

Finally finishing what he could of the paperwork, Dan gave it back to the woman at the desk and walked outside. Pulling Raleigh's phone out of his pocket, Dan scrolled down to Autumn's name. Punching the number into his phone, Dan hit send and put it to his ear. He didn't dare try using Raleigh's phone. He was surprised it was even working for how long it'd been lying in the rain.

Finally on the fourth ring Autumn answered. "Yeah?"

"What the hell happened to her, Autumn?"

"Mr. Cooper?"

"Yes, now what happened?" He was trying, he really was trying not to completely blow up at the girl but his patience was wearing thin. He needed to know what happened to Raleigh.

"Mr. Cooper, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I'm at Hollywood Medical, Autumn! Raleigh is in the ICU and I have absolutely no idea what's wrong with her."

There was a long pause on the other end of the line and Dan had thought she hung up. "Autumn?"

"I'll be right there." She then hung up and Dan had to fight the very strong urge to punch something. He hated not knowing. Not knowing just led to more unanswered questions.

Suddenly he heard "Down on Love" break the still night air and he pulled Raleigh's cell out of his pocket. Seeing that it was her brother Bobbie, he immediately hit "talk".

"Hello?"

"You're not Raleigh."

"No. I'm not."

"Where is she? She all right?" Dan heard the worry in his voice and wondered if he knew something had happened. "A guy I don't know answers my baby sister's phone after I've been calling for two hours. Where is she?"

Should he tell him? Could he tell him?

"I'm Dan."

"Oh." Dan thought he heard relief in Bobbie's sigh but he knew that relief would soon be fear. "Is she there with you?"

"Uh...kind of." He honestly didn't know what to say. It had completely escaped his mind that she had a big family in Tennessee that had no idea she was in the ER.

"Dan? She's ok isn't she?" He heard the worry and fear immediately re-enter his voice once again and Dan fought hard against the tears that began to well in his eyes.

"No, Bobbie. She's not ok."

"Where is she?"

"She's in the intensive care unit of Hollywood Medical." Dan heard only a slight silence as the news sunk into her brother's head.

"What happened to her? Was she in an accident?"

"I don't know exactly. But I think she may have overdosed on something."

"Oh my God..." Bobbie said softly before quickly adding, "I have to go tell my parents." Then he hung up.

Going back inside, Dan returned to the hard seat he had occupied moments before. Only one thought kept floating through his mind. Would she be alright? Unable to move or do anything, he just sat there and waited. For the doctor to come, a nurse, someone to call. Anything. He just waited.

After about fifteen minutes, he heard his name being called. Looking to his right he saw Autumn running towards him. Standing up, Dan began walking towards her. Immediately she wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to give him some sort of comfort. When she finally released him she got a good look at his broken appearance. His hair was disheveled from raking his fingers through it in worry, his eyes were bloodshot and rimmed with unshed tears, and he just looked exhausted.

"Have you heard anything yet?"

"No."

Sighing, Autumn moved to sit down. This was going to be a long night. "What happened?" The question was more to herself than Dan but still he felt something go off inside him.

"I don't know, Autumn! I wasn't there. Why don't you tell me?" His words were harsh and getting louder with every syllable. He knew this wasn't her fault but he just felt he needed to put the blame on someone.

"Mr. Cooper, I have no idea what happened. Last I saw her she was going into the kitchen to get a drink." As a final thought, she added, "With Effron."

"That son of a bitch. I bet he did something to her."

"Mr. Cooper, what are you talking about?"

"She didn't just OD, Autumn! She looked like she lost a brutal fight. Did you see him again after that?"

"About a half hour later or so. He ran out of the house looking pretty pissed off."

"That son of a bitch...I'm gonna kill him." Jumping up, Autumn ran in front of him and pushed hard against his chest, trying to keep him from storming out of the hospital.

"If you leave right now you'll kill him! Raleigh needs you right now. You're no good to her if you're sitting in jail! Now sit down!"

Running his hands over his tired face, Dan complied and sat down. She was right. If he went to find Effron, there was no doubt in his mind that he'd kill him. And that scared him. While they sat in silence, Dan received another phone call from Bobbie saying that their parents were on their way to the airport.

"Don't leave her, Dan."

"I won't. I promise."

"Good. If you find out anything before they get there, call me?"

"Of course."

"Thanks."

"Bye, Bobbie." Hanging up the phone, together they sat in silence once again until Dan just couldn't take it anymore. "So how long have you known about Raleigh and me?"

Letting out a small laugh, Autumn turned her head to look at him. "Since the Halloween party. The first time you two slept together."

"Well, that's just great."

"Don't worry. She didn't tell me."

"Then how did you know?"

"I'm just good at reading people." Suddenly Autumn let out a louder laugh. "You should have seen the look on her face when I said she'd been with you. It was priceless."

"Hey, she's the one who came over and seduced me in the middle of the night."

"Oh, I know." Their laughter calmed and Autumn suddenly got a chill. Rubbing her bare arms, she wished she'd have changed before going straight there. "I hate hospitals. They're always so cold."

"Well, maybe if you wore more clothing you wouldn't be so cold."

"Funny." Dan took off his jacket and handed it to her. Saying a "thank you" she quickly put it on, reveling in its warmth.

"You know, just because you have money doesn't mean you need to flaunt it throwing formal Christmas parties and whatever else you do."

"I don't have money. My parents do. Besides, I like dressing up. So do most of my friends. I think it kind of makes them feel like they have money too."

Growing quiet again, Dan was forced to think about the problem at hand. Autumn may have liked living like a rock star, but Raleigh was in trouble because of it.

"I don't know what I'll do if I lose her, Autumn."

Putting her hand on his back, she began to rub in slow calming circles. "You won't. She's going to get through this. She has to."

"I just don't know."

"You really love her, don't you?"

Looking at Autumn, Dan knew he could trust her. She'd had nearly two months to turn him in and get him fired, but she never did. She really cared about her friend's happiness. "I do. I know she's six years younger but I really am in love with her. I don't know what it is, but we just have this connection. And yes I do realize how corny that sounds."

"I'm not passing any judgment."

"You know, I didn't let it show, but when Josh was here, it about killed me to not touch her. I'd gotten so used to her coming over late at night and we'd just hang out, order Chinese or something...I just want to be with her. So much more than anybody I've ever known. And now, knowing that her life is hanging in the balance right now?" Dan shook his head as he wiped away the tears before they could fall. "I can't lose her, Autumn. I need her."

Autumn felt her composure crumble as she looked into his eyes. Pulling him to her once again, she closed her own eyes, trying to keep her breathing steady. "You're not going to lose her. We're not." If Raleigh didn't make it through this, Autumn was going to track down Effron and kill him herself.

About an hour had passed and finally the doctor came out to speak with them. Standing up, they both made their way to him.

"Is she all right?" They asked in unison.

"Are either of you family?"

"No. I'm her roommate and he's her boyfriend."

"I'm sorry, but I can't tell you anything unless you're family."

"Well her family is in Tennessee! We're all she's got right now."

"Doctor..."

"Richards."

"Doctor Richards, please. We need to know what happened. If she's going to be all right." Dan was glad Autumn was able to keep her calm. He was about ready to rip the guy's head off.

Sighing, Doctor Richards decided to tell them. If the roles were reversed he would be doing the same thing. He just hated the part of telling.

"Your friend had a large amount of cocaine and ecstasy in her system. Not only was it too much for her body to handle, the drugs mixed together along with the alcohol...it's a lethal combination."

"Is she..." Autumn tried to say the word but she just couldn't. She wouldn't believe Raleigh had died.

"She's still fighting. While we've been able to get her temperature back down to normal, she's gone into cardiac arrest twice and I'm afraid that if we can't get her heart rate down, she could suffer a fatal heart attack."

"The drugs are doing this to her?"

"In all honesty, no. If this was just an over dosage, she'd be awake right now. Her body is in panic mode. The best way I can describe it is like being stuck in a severe nightmare or reliving a traumatic experience. I'd say, with the marks on her face, she's reliving whatever it was that put her here."

"Doctor," Dan swallowed the lump in his throat. "was she raped?" Judging by his silence, Dan assumed he was right. But he needed to hear it. "Please, I need to know."

"Yes. I'm sorry to say she was. And unless she decides to press charges against whoever did this to her, there's nothing more we can do about it. Excuse me."

The doctor left them alone in stunned silence. Dan felt like he was going to be sick all over the white floor. All he could see was red as he clenched his fists into tight balls to keep from hitting the wall.

"How much coke did you give her, Autumn?"

"She only did about five lines the entire night. That's not even an eight ball. She's done a lot more than that before. But I swear to you, nobody there had any X. I don't mess with that shit."

"Well then where did she get it?"

"I don't know!"

Shaking his head, Dan looked at her. "I bet I do."

Lowering her voice, Autumn voiced her fears. "You think he nicked her?"

"I wouldn't put it past him to make her easier to handle. Judging by the marks on her face, I don't think it really worked. I think she freaked out more and he just didn't like it."

Shaking her head, Autumn took off Dan's jacket and turned to leave the hospital.

"Where are you going?"

"Just stay here. I'll be back." Before he could say another word she was out the door and getting into a cab. He wondered where she was going and what she was going to do but he didn't entirely care. He just wanted Raleigh to wake up. He wanted to be able to look into her beautiful lilac eyes again. He wanted to see her smile, hear her laughter. They had to be able to get her out of this panic mode. They had to get her heart rate down.

He hadn't had nearly enough time with her yet. He couldn't let her go now.

---

"Just wait here, this won't take long." Getting out of the cab, Autumn stalked up to the house. Wasting no time, she began banging on the door and ringing the doorbell incessantly.

"Open the damn door, Effron!" she called out, continuing to bang on the door. Why wasn't he answering? It wasn't really early in the morning anymore but it wasn't late by any means. Pulling out her phone, she tried calling him. She could hear his ringer in the house through the window, but he didn't answer. She didn't even hear any movement. If he was home he certainly didn't want to be disturbed. Trying the handle, Autumn turned it, only to find it locked. Of course it would be. This was LA after all. Didn't want one psycho breaking into the home of another. "Son of a bitch." She mumbled under her breath, making her way back to the cab. She would have gone in, not caring about the locked door, but breaking and entering was not something she needed to be charged with right now.

"Hollywood Academy of the Arts, West Dormitories please."

"Yes, Ma'am." Putting the car into drive, the man pulled back onto the street and headed to the dorms. After running up and changing she had him take her back to the hospital. After leaving the man a hefty tip, Autumn ran back into the hospital only to see Dan sitting there, bouncing his head gently off the wall. Sitting next to him, she let out a sigh.

"I'm guessing you haven't heard anything else?

"Nope. It took you forty minutes just to go and change?"

"No. I made a stop first."

"Where?"

"Effron's."

"You kill him?"

"No. But if he'd been man enough to answer the door or his phone I might have."

Dan let out a small laugh before looking at her. "And you talk about me."

"Did you call Bobbie? Let him know?"

"Yeah, I did." Dan just looked down at his entwined hands, not offering another word.

"How did he take it?"

"Not well. He's sworn to kill the guy who did this to her. Begged me to tell him if I knew who it was." Sitting in silence once again, Autumn tried to relax in the uncomfortable seat. Her eye lids felt incredibly heavy and she felt exhausted. It had been a long night and knew it was going to be an even longer day. All she wanted was for Raleigh to wake up so they could get the hell out of there and move on with their lives.

"Mr. Cooper..."

"Autumn?"

"Yeah?"

"I think after the night we've had, you can start calling me Dan." Letting her smile fall, Autumn looked away for a moment.

"Do you think that she's going to press charges?"

Dan looked straight into Autumn's eyes and didn't hesitate to answer. "Even if she doesn't want to, I'm going to use every power I possess to make sure he doesn't walk away from this unscathed."

"Good." Autumn certainly didn't want to see him walk away from this. After sitting there, feeling herself fall more into tiredness, Autumn sighed and began rummaging through her purse.

"What are you doing?"

"I can't just sit here doing nothing anymore. There you are." Turning back to face him, Autumn held up a deck of cards. "Crazy eights?"

"Nah, I'm more of a go fish type of guy."

"Go fish it is." Laughing, Autumn pulled the cards out of the box and shuffled them up. As she dealt out the deck between them they began to talk. Not about Raleigh, not about Effron, but about themselves and everything else.

After about nine rounds of go fish they decided to move onto scat.

"Dan, have you ever been in love? Before Raleigh I mean."

Looking away from Autumn and to the cards he held, Dan thought about his next move. Should he pick up the eight of spades or draw? He decided to take a chance and drew a card from the deck.

"Yeah. I was engaged."

"What happened?"

"She wound up pregnant and told me two months before she was due that the baby wasn't mine but my best friend's. I told her to get out and haven't seen her since."

"I'm sorry." And she was. Nobody should ever have to feel that type of pain. To be in love and have them just walk away, it was terrible.

"How about you?"

Picking up the ace he just threw down, Autumn put it in her hand and threw down a ten of hearts. "Thought I was once. I was sixteen and he was the most gorgeous boy I'd ever seen. He was completely infatuated with me and he told me he loved me. Of course I believed him. I wanted him to love me. I wanted anybody to love me, really. But he was a senior and I was a stupid sophomore. We dated for about three months and I thought we were going to be together forever. So when I finally slept with him, it was in the back of his pick-up truck. It lasted about ten minutes and I felt the worst pain in my life. Then he took me home and never spoke to me again. I was crushed. Cried for weeks but nobody knew. And then I found out he'd gotten me pregnant and when I told him he didn't care. Said I was a slut and how could he even know it was his." Dan watched as a few tears rolled silently down her cheeks. "I was alone and pregnant and sixteen years old. My father wanted to disown me, my mother said it would be taken care of. I miscarried the night before the appointment she made me and a part of me felt like I'd never be whole again. My parents never brought it up again after that and I just didn't care. About anything."

Setting down his cards, Dan let out a small ironic laugh. "You know, you and Raleigh are a lot more alike than I thought."

"What do you mean."

"It's not my place to say, just trust me on this."

"I do." Reaching across the chair between them, Dan wrapped his arms around her protectively. No one should have ever had to endure what they had been through. Trying to speak through the tears, Autumn said softly, "Who said that it's better to have loved and lost? I wish that I had never loved at all."

"Excuse me?" They heard a woman's voice to their side and both immediately released one another to look at her. "You're here for Ms. Coons, right?"

"Yes. Is she awake?" Autumn asked, wiping away her tears.

"No, I'm afraid not. But you can come back and see her if you like. We think having people around who love her and need her might help her pull through."

Just nodding, Dan and Autumn stood up and followed the nurse back to where they were keeping Raleigh. As soon as Autumn saw her she broke down into tears once again.

"She's not breathing on her own?"

The nurse looked at Dan with a sympathetic look on her face. "No, she's not. The second time she went into cardiac arrest her lungs collapsed."

Looking at all of the machines, Dan zeroed in on the rapidly beeping monitor. "Her heart rates still up?"

The nurse nodded and moved forward a few steps. "It has gone down a little, which is a very good sign. But its still much higher than we'd like."

"Can you get me something to clean the tar off her with, please?"

"Sure." The nurse left and Dan immediately pulled a chair up beside Raleigh. Taking her hand in his, he looked at her relaxed face. She didn't look like she was having a bad nightmare, she looked at peace. Like everything was right in the world.

When the nurse came back into the room she handed him a washcloth with a bowl of warm water. "Here you go, sir."

"Thank you." Taking the cloth and bowl from the woman, Dan set it on his lap and soaked the entire cloth. Ringing out the excess water, he gently began dabbing at the tar staining Raleigh's face and neck. He understood that they had to pump her stomach to get the drugs and alcohol out, but couldn't they at least clean her up after? He carefully cleaned around the tube that was inside her mouth until he was satisfied she was clean enough to stop.

Setting down the bowl of now black water, Dan took Raleigh's hand in his once again. Looking at her relaxed face, Dan tried to hide the tears as they sprung to his eyes.

"Hey, baby girl. It's me." He whispered to her. Reaching up, he gently brushed her hair away from her face. "Listen, you gotta wake up, ok? I'm not ready to let you go just yet. We have so much to look forward to. Christmas in two weeks, my birthday...just time with each other. You can't let go, Raleigh. I need you." As a tear escaped his eyes, Dan whispered softly, "I love you, Raleigh. You hear me? You can‘t leave me because I love you. I don‘t know what I‘ll do without you here with me."

Watching from the wall she was leaning against, Autumn felt tears streaming down her face. She'd never had a friend in the hospital before. No one even close enough to her that made her upset. Raleigh was her first real friend. She couldn't just let her die because a guy she'd hooked her up with was a jealous freak. She'd rather die than let happen.

Hearing the cries of a frantic woman outside, getting closer to the room, Autumn straightened and wiped her face just as Doctor Richards entered with a man and woman. She guessed they were Raleigh's parents.

"Oh my God." The woman whispered, immediately running to her daughter's side.

Seeing the couple in the room, Dan let go of Raleigh's hand and stood up, wiping his face clean of any tears that may have strayed. Clearing his throat, he asked, "Are you Mr. and Mrs. Coons?"

"Yes. You must be the young man who brought her in?" Mr. Coons offered Dan his hand. He took it, shaking it firmly.

"Yes sir. I'm Dan." Motioning to Autumn, Dan introduced her. "This is Autumn, Raleigh's roommate at the dorm.

"It's nice to meet you, although I wish it were under better circumstances." He said. Autumn just nodded, unable to get her voice to work. Turning back to the doctor, Mr. Coons asked, "So, is there anything else you can do for her?"

"As of right now, it's just a waiting game I'm afraid."

"Thank you, Doctor Richards." Nodding, the doctor left them alone with their loved one.

Feeling uncomfortable, Dan decided it would be best if he left them with their daughter. "We should go, give you some time alone with her." Pulling her cell phone out of his pocket, he handed it to Mr. Coons. "Here's her cell phone, I'm not sure what they did with her clothes. Well, uh...goodbye." Turning to leave, Dan only stopped when he heard Raleigh's mother call him.

"Daniel?" Standing up, she went over to him and wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you."

Looking into the older woman's eyes, Dan just smiled as best he could and nodded. Then he turned around and left with Autumn.

Dan had never felt more helpless than he did right then at that moment, walking out of the hospital.

Twenty seven seconds.

How long did he have to wait?

Twenty nine seconds.

Twenty three hours later and he still hadn't heard a thing from Raleigh, her parents, Autumn, or the doctor at the hospital. Was she still unconscious? Was her heart rate still up, showing no signs of slowing in the near future? Was it far worse?

Had she died?

No, he wouldn't think about that. She was still alive, he knew it. He could feel it inside him, all the way down to his bones.

But this was ridiculous.

How could nobody have called him yet? How could there not have been even one small change in her vitals?

Twenty three hours, sixteen minutes, and eleven seconds since he left her at Hollywood Medical. He was going to lose it soon. He needed to know how she was, if she was going to wake up soon. If she was going to be alright. He couldn't just sit around his silent house, waiting for something to happen to her while he wasn't there. He needed to be by her side, regardless if her parents were there now.

Not thinking another thought, Dan grabbed his car keys and ran out the door, not even bothering to lock it behind himself. Not wasting anytime, Dan drove onto the thruway and did eighty the entire way, not giving a damn if he passed a cop or two. Making it to the hospital in record time, Dan threw his car into park, jumped out and ran in through the doors. Trying to calm himself, he slowed to a walk and headed to Raleigh's room in the ICU.

What the hell?

Looking through the glass into the room, Dan saw that a small child lay where Raleigh had been just yesterday. A younger woman sat at his side, holding his hand, sobbing as she watched him sleep. Where was she?

Turning around, Dan tried to find someone who could give him the information he needed. When his eyes planted on the nurse he and Autumn had spoken to the day before, he immediately went up to her.

"Excuse me." He tapped her shoulder to get her attention. When she turned, he began speaking. "I don't know if you remember me, but I was with a young woman yesterday in the ICU."

"Yes, Ms. Coons." She nodded, hugging the chart she held to her chest.

"Yes. Where is she?" He felt like he was going to burst. The nurse's face softened as she looked at him.

"Nobody called you?" Dan looked at her wearily. What was she getting at? Why should someone have called him? What happened to Raleigh that he was unaware of?

Shaking his head, Dan never broke their gaze. "No."

---

What was that god-awful noise? It sounded like the incessant beeping of an alarm clock that refused to turn off. It started as just a faint little blip as thought it were far away, then it slowly became louder with every beep. It felt like it was getting closer and closer, as though it were inside her head, echoing throughout her brain.

God, what was it?

She tried to open her eyes so she could look at the annoying object, but she couldn't. Her eyelids felt like pieces of lead that had been welded shut. She tried to move her arm, her hand, her fingers...anything. But nothing would move. Her head, her leg, her foot...nothing. She was completely immobile. Oh god.

Am I paralyzed?

No, she couldn't be, she could feel herself. She could feel everything. Her toes, her fingers...but why wouldn't they move? It felt like she wasn't in control of her own body. That was crazy. It was her body, nobody else could possibly be controlling it.

Ugh, that sound. It just kept getting louder and louder, soon it would be too much for her to handle.

Now what is that?

There was this other sound. It was sort of muffled. It kind of sounded like voices, all around her. She couldn't make out what they were saying or if they were male or female, but she knew they were definitely voices. What was going on?

Am I dead?

No. She'd always heard tales of blinding white light and your ancestors meeting you at the end of a tunnel to welcome you into Heaven. But all she saw was blackness among the noise. Was this Hell?

She felt completely aware of herself, but she just couldn't move or make out certain noises. They were there, but just out of reach. Was this her punishment for how she'd been living her life? Was that what put her in this place?

Suddenly, there was a slight pain in her stomach. It began as just an uncomfortable pinch at first before turning into a burning sensation. Before she could really acknowledge it was there it turned into a harsh searing pain as though someone had taken a knife to her stomach. She would have doubled over in pain had she been able to move. Suddenly she became very aware of the pain in her face and throat. Her legs felt insanely sore and she could feel tears beginning to tickle the back of her burning throat. What was going on?

When the pounding began in her head, she fought the tiredness she felt and forced her eyes open, trying to take in a deep breath so she could scream in protest of the pain, but she couldn't. Something was in her throat blocking her airway, all she could do was choke as she tried to inhale the breath she desperately needed.

"Oh my God! Go get the doctor!" Deb yelled at her husband as she watched her daughter begin to choke on the intubator. She rushed to her side and tried to calm her, waiting for the doctor to come in and remove the tube.

Just seconds later the doctor and nurse rushed in, telling Deb to back up so they could remove the tube from Raleigh's throat.

"Raleigh, I need you to calm down and relax. When I count to three I need you to exhale. 1...2...3." As soon as he said three, Raleigh exhaled what little breath she had and gagged as the tube was removed from her throat. As she coughed and choked, she gulped in as much as air as she could. She felt like she was learning to breathe again. When she finally felt like she caught her breath, she leaned back against the bed, fighting her obscured vision. When she swallowed, it felt as though hundreds of tiny razor blades were stuck in her throat. She tried to ask for water but all that came out was a croak. Immediately the nurse was at her side holding a plastic cup, straw bent towards her. She slightly raised her head to suck down the cool liquid, trying not to choke on it.

"Raleigh, I'm Doctor Richards. Do you know where you are?" He asked smoothly as he flashed a light into each of her eyes.

Blinking away from the obscenely bright light, Raleigh began to look around herself. Her vision was slowly beginning to clear and she knew she was at the hospital. "Hollywood Medical?" She flinched at how hoarse her voice sounded.

"Very good. Do you have any recollection of the past forty-eight hours?" Trying to keep her eyelids from closing, Raleigh tried to think back on what could have possibly happened to her that she had wound up there. All she could focus on was the pounding in her head, the aching in her arms, legs and face, and the increasing desire to just close her eyes and fall asleep. She managed to shake her head once before she gave in and closed her eyes, feeling sleep wash over her immediately.

"Doctor, will she be alright?" Keith asked, unable to tear his eyes from his baby girl's limp body.

"I believe so. Her heart rate is back to normal and she woke up. That's the important thing. She'll probably be out for a few more hours. You folks are welcome to stay with her or go and get some rest. Either way she'll be taken care of." Softening his voice, Doctor Richards said, "You're daughter is going to be fine."

"Thank you." Deb felt the sob escape from her throat before she could think to stop it and Keith wrapped his arms around her shaking body. He wasn't the emotional type, but Keith felt a few tears of relief roll down his cheeks. He'd come so close to losing his youngest daughter. That was a type of loss he felt as though no parent should ever have to feel.

Pulling away from his wife and wiping the tears from his cheeks, Keith pulled out his cell phone. "I'm going to go call the kids. Let them know how she's doing."

"Ok." When Keith left, Deb sat at her daughter's side and pulled her hand into her own. The past year hadn't been so great between them but she was still her little girl. She'd die before she'd let anything happen to any of her children. She suddenly regretted now more than ever that she hadn't spoken to her so much while she'd been gone. But even more so, she regretted not telling Raleigh how much she loved her after every conversation. A few more tears slipped past her red-rimmed eyes as she thought of how Raleigh could have died and the last time Deb had told her she loved her was when she'd left for LA. It's funny how it takes something like a near death experience to get you to really think.

Hearing someone come down the hall and stop at Raleigh's room, Deb wiped her eyes and turned towards the door.

"Daniel." Surprise etched her features when she saw the young man standing there looking about as great as she was sure she herself looked. Standing up, Deb went to him. "Come in."

"I'm sorry for just showing up like this. I was going crazy at home not knowing how she is."

"Don't apologize. I'm glad you're here."

Finally allowing himself to look at Raleigh, Dan was shocked to see the intubator was gone.

"She's breathing on her own?" His eyes never left her as he walked closer, taking her hand in his.

"Yes. Not even ten minutes ago she just woke up. Keith is calling the rest of the kids to let them know." Dan heard the relief in the woman's voice as she fought past a fresh onslaught of tears. "Doctor Richards says she's going to be fine."

"Thank god." He breathed out as he leaned down to place a kiss on Raleigh's forehead. The action felt too intimate to be doing with her mother standing right there, but at the same time he just didn't care. The woman he loved was going to be fine. They were going to make it through this, he was sure of it.

Going over to the man who obviously held a lot of affection for her daughter, Deb set a gentle hand on his shoulder. He gave a start and laughed a little when he looked at Deb. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Deb smiled at him as she took his hand. "Let's go get some coffee and we can talk." Dan nodded his compliance and gave Raleigh one last look, as if to reassure himself she'd be fine, before he allowed himself to go along with her.

After getting their coffee-Dan ever the gentleman, paid- they sat down in comfortable silence.

"So." Deb began the conversation. "How did you and Raleigh meet? Do you have a class together?" The way she peered at him over her paper cup as she took a careful drink of the hot liquid, Dan got the distinct impression that she already knew the truth, whether or not her daughter had told her.

"Sort of." He didn't know this woman, but he did respect her. That's why he decided to tell her the truth. "In all honestly, Mrs. Coons..."

"Please, call me Deb."

"Deb. I'm not a student at the school."

"Oh?" Deb allowed a small smirk to form on her face as she set down her cup. "You're an instructor. Am I right?"

Smiling slightly, Dan could only nod.

"I thought so. When I first saw you I noticed you just had that authoritative look about you." She could tell he was worried she'd turn him into the Board of Education, and as unhappy as she was about her daughter dating such an older man who was also her professor, she was done controlling her life. After all, it hadn't done much good the last time, did it? "And when I see the way you look at Raleigh, I can see just how much you care for her."

"I do. When I saw her lying unconscious on the ground...it nearly killed me. I know that if she hadn't made it, it would have succeeded."

Reaching across the table, Deb set her hand on top of him, rubbing gently. It was funny how just a simple touch from this woman could comfort him. He'd never known that kind of comfort from his own mother when she‘d been alive. Raleigh didn't know how lucky she truly was.

"You know, when Raleigh called home to ask if it was ok if you joined us for Christmas, some of the happiness I haven't heard in her voice in a long time was back. Even when she felt like she finally had Josh back she wasn't nearly as happy as I can tell she is now with you."

"Well, Josh was the only love she's ever known. I can imagine how much it hurt her for him to end it the way he did."

"Well, none of us are immune to pain, are we?"

Smiling, Dan thought about Christina. "No, we definitely aren't."

"Either way, I think you're the best thing that could have happened to her. Only her brother and best friend really know what has been going on with her here so I won't pretend I know. But I am glad she has you."

Dan could only offer her another smile, this one genuine. What could he possibly say after that? Somehow, "thank you" just didn't seem like enough.

Suddenly, Dan's cell phone began to ring and he silently cursed himself for not turning it off. Pulling it out of his pocket, he saw that it was Autumn.

"I'm sorry, I really should take this."

"Go right ahead." Deb turned her head and sipped on her now cooled coffee as Dan flipped open his phone and put it to his ear.

"Hey, Autumn."

"Oh my god, Dan! I'm going crazy here. Please tell me you've heard something!"

"Autumn, calm down! I'm at the hospital right now actually. Why don't you come down and I'll catch you up with what's gone on?"

"I'll be there in like ten minutes." Autumn hung up before Dan could say another word.

Flipping his phone shut, Dan replaced it in his pocket before apologizing to Deb. "I'm sorry. That was Autumn, Raleigh's roommate. She‘s going as crazy as I was."

Deb smiled at him before becoming somber once again. "Dan, may I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Do you know the son of a bitch who did this to my baby?"

Looking her in the eye, Dan wondered how much he should tell her. But he just couldn't bring himself to lie to her. So, sighing, Dan ran a hand through his disheveled hair. "We think it was Effron Walker although we can't be sure until Raleigh's coherent enough to tell us."

"Why do you think it was him?"

"He was the last person Autumn saw her with and..." He stopped himself again wondering if he should really be saying this to her mother.

"And?" She urged him on. Seeing the need in her eyes to know what he knew, Dan gave in. He knew what that felt like all too well.

"Before Raleigh and I got started she'd been sort of seeing him. They'd go out and party, get drunk, and there's not a doubt in my mind that she did some coke with them too." He hated how he sounded but he couldn't stop now. He just couldn‘t soften the blow his words might have on the woman. "Raleigh told me that she knew things were getting out of hand with him and distanced herself. When josh was here last month she noticed Effron was basically acting like a jealous, possessive boyfriend. And when Josh left she went back to him. I'm pretty sure it was just the one night, but don't quote me on that. All I know for sure is that he wanted more with her than she was willing to give."

When Dan finished he'd expected Deb to break down into tears once again or to even lash out in anger. But what he hadn't expected was her completely calm demeanor as she drank the rest of her coffee.

"So, you stayed faithfully by her side while she whored it up, huh?" Deb let out an incredulous laugh as she sadly shook her head. "After all she's been through this past year, you'd thing a girl would learn."

"In all fairness, she was really trying. And I don't think she'd have gone back to feed the fire if I hadn't ended us."

Looking at the young man with confusion, Deb asked, "What do you mean?"

Taking a deep breath, Dan leaned his elbows on the table and put his hands to his face, trying to rub away the tension he felt so strongly. He might as well continue being honest with her. "Well, two weeks ago or so, I told her I didn't think it was a good idea for us to keep seeing each other. She didn't protest or fight it so I figured she agreed with me. The days following I noticed how much she was hanging on Effron. The way she would look at me during class...I knew it was just to get a rise out of me. But I never said anything. I wish now that I had."

"Daniel, you can't blame yourself for Raleigh's choices. But I'm afraid I have to ask, are you here out of guilt or love?"

Dan swallowed the razor blades down that seemed to have made his throat a home and looked into Deb's eyes that very nearly matched Raleigh's.

"Deb I ended it because I was afraid I was getting too lost. I was scared I felt more for her than she did for me. But when she showed up at my doorstep the night of her grandmother's birthday, I realized how wrong I'd been." Dan saw the sad smile form on her lips and he knew she was thinking about her late mother. "She was such a mess over it. Having lost both her grandmother and me.

"She always was closest with my mother. I think it hurt her worse than it did me when she passed."

Leaning forward, Dan couldn't help but to tell Deborah his true feelings for her daughter.

"Deb, despite everything Raleigh has done, all the mistakes she's made, I know who she really is and I know who she wants to be. And I am completely, helplessly in love with her for it."

Smiling, Deb placed her hand gently on his cheek. "Dan, I don't doubt your affection for Raleigh in the least." No longer knowing what to do or say, Dan simply smiled at the woman.

Removing her hand, Deb cleared her throat and picked up her empty coffee cop. "I'm going to grab a cup for Keith and then we can head back up. I think we've left Raleigh alone long enough."

Agreeing, Dan stood and waited patiently for Deb before heading back up to where Raleigh now slept.

As they entered the room, Keith stood and came to his wife, taking the coffee from her as she held it out to him.

"You read my mind."

"Did you call the kids?"

"Yeah. Janie broke down into tears, Alan, and Nick were just relieved. And Rob is trying to get me to let him come out here." Keith shook his head as he sighed, taking a small sip of his coffee, wincing slightly at the heat. "I know he's her twin and all but he still has a final left at school. I can't just let him skip it to come out here when she's going to be fine." Putting her arms around Keith, Deb rested her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes.

"He's just worried about her. We all are."

Watching the way Deb hung on Keith and how he held her, Dan saw something he'd truly never known in his parents. He saw the love these two held for one another and how much they meant to each other. It really made him think about the kind of relationship his own parents had had with one another. Were they ever really happy?

But more than that, he could tell just how exhausted they were. Clearing his throat, Dan met eyes with Keith. "Listen, I can see how tired you both are and since I'm here and Autumn will be here any minute, why don't you guys go and get some sleep? I'll call when she wakes up."

Smiling at Dan, Deb finally let go of her husband.

"Did you guys check into a hotel that I can drop you off at?"

"Uh no. Actually we just came straight here from the airport."

"Oh. Well, then why don't you stay at my house?"

Deb began shaking her head, holding her hand up in protest. "Oh no, Dan we couldn't impose."

"Deb, I insist. It would save you guys money and I assure you I have the room. Its no trouble at all, really." Deb and Keith looked at one another before turning back to Dan.

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. Besides I think you guys could use some good food rather than the hospital's stuff I'm sure you've been eating."

Deb smiled sheepishly and her face became slightly crimson. "Actually, we haven't eaten at all. It wasn't really on my mind until now. I am actually quite hungry."

"Well, then let me take you to my house and get you guys settled in when Autumn gets here."

"All right." Keith said before taking a seat back at his daughter's side, sipping on his coffee.

They sat together in comfortable silence for about three minutes before Autumn finally arrived. She went straight over to Dan, a serious expression written on her face. "You didn't tell me they moved her! I went back down to the ICU like a fool trying to find you guys!" Dan stood and allowed a smile to come to his face as he listened to Autumn's tirade.

"Autumn, calm down. I'm sorry I just forgot to mention it."

"It's ok. So, what's going on?" Autumn finally turned to the bed and allowed her eyes to skim over Raleigh's sleeping form.

"She woke up a little while ago. She's breathing on her own and her heart rate is back to normal. She's going to be fine."

"Oh thank god!" She breathed a sigh of relief as she fell into Dan's arms, looking for some sort of comfort. After a moment, Dan let her go and motioned to Raleigh's parents.

"I'm going to take them back to my place so they can get some food and sleep. You gonna be ok here by yourself until I get back?"

Autumn waved a hand dismissively and sat down beside her friend. "You guys go, I'll be fine here."

Dan nodded and Deb and Keith took turns kissing their daughter on the forehead. Keith squeezed her hand and whispered, "I love you baby girl. We'll be back in a few hours." Then they all left, following Dan out to his car.

Sitting there, Autumn allowed herself to really take in Raleigh's appearance. The swelling around her eye and mouth had gone down immensely, but the bruising was still really bad, as was the cut on her lip. Reaching out, Autumn took her by the hand, squeezing gently.

"Hey you. We finally get a minute alone." She let out a small laugh. "I'm glad you're going to be fine. There was a minute there that I'd thought we lost you." She sat there for a second, just looking at her, and she began to feel the tickle in the back of her throat that had become so familiar over the past couple days. "You know, I know I never told you this, but I really am happy it was you who became my roommate this semester. I finally found out what it was like to have a best friend, a true friend, and I took it for granted. We never really sat down and talked about things that happened in our pasts, why I feel the way I do about men, why you're really so hung up on Josh. All I know is he made you feel a world of pain after you loved him for most of your life. And then you came here and now you're with Dan. He's really a great guy, Ray. I wish you could see just how broken up over this he really is." Stopping to try and stop the tears from forming in her eyes, Autumn diverted her them, looking anywhere around the room except for at Raleigh. "I know that when you wake up and are able to leave the hospital your parents are probably going to take you home to Tennessee. I don't want them to make you run away because of what happened. I'd really miss you if you left permanently, you know? Even if I have to kill Effron to get you to stay, I'd do it. I'm sure Dan would too. He's not going to get away with this, Ray. I promise you."

---

Pulling into the driveway, Dan turned off the engine and they all began to get out of his car.

Standing on the driveway, Deb looked at the large house in awe. "This is your home?"

"Yes, well it was my parents' house. I inherited it when they died."

"I'm so sorry."

Giving a half-hearted shrug as he helped Keith with their bags, he smiled at Deb. "Don't be." As they walked up to the front porch, Dan went through his keys to find the right one and quickly slid it into the door to unlock it, allowing them entry.

"Here we are. Home sweet home." Dan said with less enthusiasm than he meant.

Keith walked around the living room and gave a whistle of appreciation. "Wow, Dan this is great. You don't get this kind of house from owning a small café in Tennessee, I'll tell you that."

"Stop it. You love the café." Deb smirked at him.

Clearing his throat Dan began pointing to different rooms, giving them a short tour. "Alright, this is the living room, obviously. There is a bathroom right there," he pointed to a dark oak door in the corner of the room. "Over here is the study complete with a fireplace and grand piano, another bathroom off in the corner." Walking out of the study, Dan led them to the kitchen, Raleigh's favorite room of the house. "And here is the kitchen. Luckily I just went shopping so it is stocked with food, feel free to help yourselves." Keith and Deb followed Dan up the stairs and down the long hallway, passing four more doors before stopping at a double-door entry. "And this will be your room. It's my favorite guest room if I do say so." Opening the doors, Dan entered and smiled when he saw Deb's mouth drop open.

"Dan, this room is gorgeous. I think its about two of our bedrooms combined back home."

"Well, I'm glad you like it." Going over to the wall to the left of the doorway, Dan opened another door and turned on the light, illuminating yet another bathroom. "You have your own bathroom and the towels and washcloths are under the sink."

Just standing there, taking in her surroundings, Deb felt at a loss for words.

"Thank you for this, Dan. You really didn't have to open your home to my wife and I."

"Sir, Raleigh means the world to me, and you're her parents. I wouldn't have it any other way." Keith nodded at Dan and gave a small smile. The man really was a bit intimidating. He'd take facing Scot any day of the week over this guy. "Alright, well if you're both fine here I think I'll head back to the hospital. Feel free to make yourselves at home." Deb and Keith nodded and Dan left them alone. He locked the front door behind himself then went to his car and drove back to Hollywood Medical. He hated leaving Raleigh for even a few minutes, let alone nearly an hour.

When he finally got back into the hospital room, Autumn was just sitting there deep in thought, staring at Raleigh's immobile face. He tried to imagine what she'd be thinking that hard about but he was clueless. Clearing his throat, Dan smiled and asked, "Am I interrupting?"

Startled, Autumn jumped a little and turned her head to see who was there. "Oh, Dan, you're back."

"I am." She let out a small laugh as he stepped forward a few steps. "I didn't mean to scare you. You must have been in your own little world."

"Uh, yeah. I was." Dan nodded and went to sit across from Autumn on the other side of Raleigh. After smoothing out Raleigh's hair a bit, he looked back to Autumn and noticed her haggard appearance. He knew she was upset about everything going on with Raleigh, but he couldn't imagine it being that bad for her, she looked worse than him.

"Autumn, what's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?" She said wearily, wondering why he'd be asking her this.

"You look tired. Well, no exhausted, pale."

"Well, my friend is lying unconscious in the hospital and has been for over a day now. You would know how that makes me feel better than anyone."

"No, I mean, you look like there's more going on with you than this." He noticed the way she refused to meet his eyes, the way she bit her bottom lip to stop the trembling, how she twisted her hands in one another. He said, "Autumn, she's going to be fine." to reassure her, but he knew Raleigh lying there was not what had Autumn acting this way.

"I know that." She continued to look over Raleigh's slowly healing face.

"Autumn, seriously, you're worrying me. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I'm fine." shaking her head, Autumn cleared her throat and plastered a fake smile on her lips. "Do you want to play some more cards?"

Knowing fully well that Autumn was the type of person who wouldn't say anything if she didn't want to, Dan gave up and stood, motioning to the table on the side of the room. He wasn't going to pressure Autumn to open up to him more than she already had. If she wanted someone to talk to, he'd be there for her, if not, he'd still be there.

"Alright. But I refuse to play crazy eights with you anymore." He smiled at her as he sat down. Surprisingly, she returned the smile whole-heartedly.

"What's the matter, Dan? Don't take well to losing?"

"I didn't lose. You cheated." Crossing her arms across her chest, Autumn leaned back against the chair.

"Tell me, how do you cheat at crazy eights?"

"Why don't you tell me since you're the one who cheated?"

"I didn't cheat but fine. What would you like to play then? Go fish? No wait, I could cheat at that too."

"Ok smartass, I lost. Happy now?"

"Yes." Autumn gave him a smug smile and he let out a laugh as he shuffled the cards.

"Nine hole golf ok?"

"Yeah that's fine. They played two games of nine hole golf then during their first game of gin rummy a nurse came in to check of Raleigh.

"She looks really good." She said, writing something on her chart. When she was done she cast a smile their way. "I think we can expect her to wake up soon." Then she was gone, leaving Autumn and Dan alone to speak.

"I can't wait until she wakes up." Dan was the first to break the deafening silence. "I miss her voice, her smile, hell I even miss all her annoying habits."

"Like what? The way she leaves her soaking wet towels on the bathroom floor? Or her incessant refusal to rinse down the shower when she's done so you don't slip and break your neck on her soap suds."

Dan laughed and regardless of how much these things drove him crazy, he wouldn't change anything about Raleigh for all the money in the world. And he was pretty sure Autumn wouldn't either. "I miss her snoring. It's kind of hard to sleep now without."

"Do you think they'll release her when she wakes up?"

"I don't know. I hope so. I'm sick of being here. I just want to take her home."

Autumn raised an eyebrow at Dan as she peered at him over her cards. "Home?"

Raising his eyes to meet hers, Dan furrowed his brow in confusion. "What?"

"You said you just want to take her home."

"Oh, you know what I mean." Dan waved his hand dismissively and continued to look at his cards, debating on his next move. They played two more hands before Dan finally won and jumped up, raising his hands in the air triumphantly. "Yes! I won!"

"Yeah, yeah. One out of three ain't bad." Autumn watched in mock humor before she felt her stomach give a loud rumble, causing Dan to give her a sharp look.

"Damn woman, you could say ‘excuse me'."

Autumn reached forward and slugged Dan in the leg, trying to keep a straight face. "That was my stomach, you freak."

Pouting like a small boy, Dan put his hand over his heart and fell back down into his chair. "Now was that really called for?"

"Yes." Autumn allowed herself to laugh whole-heartedly for the first time in what felt like weeks before standing up and reaching for her purse. "I'm going to go get some food at the Wendy's down the street."

Reaching into his back pocket, Dan pulled out his wallet and fished out a twenty dollar bill. "Good, get me a double cheeseburger combo, biggy size with a cherry coke. And whatever you want." He gave her a cheesy smile and added a , "please?"

"Damn, you eat a lot."

"I'm hungry." He frowned at her. She began to turn away and he quickly called out to her. "Oh! Extra onions on the burger."

"You know, I'm gonna have to sit here with your extra onions."

"Hey, I'm buying so I think you can handle it."

Autumn shook her head and turned to leave, but her smile betrayed her annoyance.

After ordering their food, she waited there at the counter patiently.

"Autumn, is that you?" Hearing her name being called, Autumn turned around and groaned inwardly as she tried not to roll her eyes at the two girls walking up to her. She'd been friends with the bitch twins her first semester at Hollywood Academy, but then she'd smartened up.

"Blaire, Jeanette, so nice to see you." She didn't even try to remotely cover up the disdain she felt for the obnoxious duo.

"I thought that was you." Blaire said.

"How's your friend?" Jeanette added with just as much attitude.

"Which one?"

"You know, the one who was drugged and raped at YOUR Christmas party."

"Thanks for the invite, bye the way."

"No problem." Autumn smiled when she saw Jeanette roll her eyes. "She's fine. How did you hear about that?"

"We have our sources. We also heard that she's been banging Mr. Cooper."

"We knew she was a talent less whore, but to go so low to get a good grade?"

"That's just pathetic."

Lowering her voice, Autumn took a few steps closer to the twins and tried her hardest to not beat the crap out of both of them. "If anyone needs to sleep their way to the top, it's you. Raleigh is the best in the school and you both know it."

Blaire clucked her tongue. "Oh, touchy."

"I'm sorry, did we insult your girlfriend?"

"You're lucky we're in public or you wouldn't be standing right now." Without another word, Autumn grabbed her food and drinks and left, heading back to the hospital trying not to look back for fear of getting arrested for murder.

When she returned to the room, she pretended nothing was wrong as they dug into their food. As soon as Dan opened his cheeseburger, Autumn got a strong whiff of onion and gagged.

"Ugh that smell is disgusting."

Smiling even wider, Dan picked up his burger and wafted it towards her. "Mm, smell that delicious aroma."

"Oh my God, you are such an ass. I don't know how Raleigh puts up with you." Autumn laughed as she pushed his arm away.

"She puts up with me because I'm just oh so dreamy." He laughed at himself before sobering up. "You seriously don't like onions?"

"no. I used to love them but now even the smell makes me wanna puke."

Dan took a big bite of his double cheeseburger and chewed thoughtfully while looking at Autumn. "Maybe you're pregnant."

Autumn burst out laughing at that, trying not to spew chewed French fries all over the place. "Oh Mom and Dad would love that. Their only daughter, that they already named a disgrace, pregnant by a black guy. That'd be the icing on a fantastic year." When her laughter subsided, she could only shake her head. Dan thought she might break down and cry so he tried to keep her talking and wondered when the last time she truly opened up to somebody was.

"So, you and David, huh?"

"Davey."

"Sorry, Davey."

"Yep. Me and Davey. I mean, we're not dating or anything, but..." Autumn sighed and leaned back in her chair. "Yeah."

"Well, that's cool. I mean he seems like a good guy. I only hope he's better than his buddy."

"Trust me, Dan. He is." Something in the way Autumn said the words as she starred into his eyes made him want to believe her. So he did.

Not three seconds later they heard a rustling on the bed followed by Raleigh's raspy voice. "I thin anyone is better than him. Can I have a fry?"

Dan and Autumn quickly looked to Raleigh's bed and just sat there, mouths gaping in a dumbfounded expression for a few moments before laughter took over. After the chock of hearing Raleigh speak wore off, they stood and went to her side.

"I'm assuming you feel better?" Dan said, handing her a French fry.

"Than what? I feel like I got hit by a train and I haven't eaten in days. Can I have some water, please?" Dan poured a glass of water from the pink pitcher that sat on the bed tray and gave it to her to sip.

"I'm gonna go get the nurse." Autumn was only gone for about two minutes before she walked back into the room followed by the perky, plump nurse.

"Well, good morning sunshine." The nurse smiled brilliantly at Raleigh while removing her stethoscope from around her neck. "How are you feeling?"

"Been better. Can I get a couple aspirin?" She hated how whiney she sounded, but she hadn't been lying when she said she felt as though she'd been hit by a train. Everything on her body ached.

"I'll see what I can do, but for now I need to check you over."

Dan excused himself and went out into the hallway to call Raleigh's parents. They sounded ecstatic when he told them she'd woken up and they told him they'd get a cab and be right over. When he re-entered the room ,the nurse was telling Raleigh everything looked really good.

"Now, I'm afraid, the questions are coming. Do you remember everything that happened?" Raleigh looked down at her hands as she twisted the ring Josh had given her around her finger.

"I remember everything."

"Well, that's good. It means the ecstasy didn't do any permanent damage." How she could just come out and say that, Dan had no idea. When Raleigh's eyes snapped up to the nurse's face, he just wanted to choke her for being so insensitive.

"Ecstasy?"

The nurse sighed as she hugged her chart to her chest. "Raleigh, Doctor Richards found a large amount of the drug, along with cocaine, in your system. You're incredibly lucky to be sitting here talking to me right now."

Raleigh just sat there in stunned silence. She'd known she had done a lot of coke, but ex? She would never do that. She'd seen far too often what the chemical did to people.

"All right, well, I have to go and let Dr. Richards know you're awake so he can do another examination on you and get Officer Jones in here." The woman turned and left the room with a smile on her face as if they'd just been talking about nothing more than the weather. Raleigh on the other hand was freaking out.

"Officer Jones....Officer Jones?!"

"Raleigh, you need to clam down. I'm sure it's just routine, but anyway your parents well be back here in a few minutes and they can speak with him." Autumn's voice was soothing as if she were speaking to a child that had just lost her favorite doll. Luckily it worked. For the moment, Raleigh's mind was now on the fact that her parents were in town.

"My parents are here? In LA?"

"Yeah. They just left for a few hours to try and get some sleep."

"Ok." She nodded that she understood but she didn't understand at all. How much had she missed while she'd been out? How long had she been out?"

Where was Effron?

Dr. Richards waited with Raleigh until her parents had arrived. Her mother came running in, crying and hugging and kissing her baby girl, refusing to stop until Raleigh insisted that she was fine. Her father had just hugged her tightly. Nobody knew what he had whispered to her but whatever it was made Raleigh's eyes instantly tear up and she whispered, "I love you, Daddy."

When he released her, a very tall, very dark, man entered the room, dressed in full police uniform. He identified himself as Officer Jones and Raleigh felt her fear return, ten fold. What was going to happen to her? Was he going to throw her in jail for being such a juvenile delinquent? Would she be forced to go back home?

Would he even care to hear about how she knew for a fact that she'd been drugged so she would have been easier to handle? The man turned to speak with her, but before she could even register what he had said to her, her father stepped up and said something to him. Officer Jones had nodded, excused himself, and together they went out into the hallway to speak. She hadn't known what her father said the to large man, but Raleigh couldn't have thanked him enough when he came back in, alone.

"Honey, what's going on?" Deb looked at him with worry in her eyes, but Keith just smiled and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Absolutely nothing. It's taken care of."

As relieved as Raleigh was to be off the hook, she still felt some sort of uneasiness stir in the pit of her stomach. She didn't want to be in trouble with the police, but she wanted to at least speak with them. She didn't want to cause a huge scene about it, but Effron had drugged and raped her. She could have possibly lost her life.

Didn't anyone care?

"Fine. We'll take you back to the dorm for a little while so you can shower and get some rest. But I'd much rather be near you to make sure you're all right."

"You mean so you can keep an eye on me to make sure I don't run off and screw up again."

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to!" Raleigh snapped. She didn't know if it was the fact that she was tired and aggravated or if her mother really bothered her that much, but she felt the need to defend herself. She'd known her mother long enough to know the hidden meaning behind her words. "You've been waiting for me to screw up again ever since Josh came home for the summer. Well congratulations, Mom. You're daughter is a big fuck up. Are you happy now?"

Keith knew his wife was about to blow up on their daughter so he decided it'd be best to intervene before punches were thrown. He'd seen fights between the two women more times than he cared to acknowledge. The hospital was not the place for another one. And as much as he knew Raleigh was telling the truth, he couldn't take sides.

"That's enough!" Keith's boisterous voice was enough to stop the feud and gain their attention. "Raleigh, watch your language. Deborah, she's an adult now. She can live her life however she chooses so I suggest you stop trying to control it."

"I'm sorry, but who is it paying for her tuition and giving her a three-hundred dollar allowance each month so she doesn't have to work? As long as it's our money keeping her here, she still has to do as we say."

"You mean as you say."

"Raleigh, I swear to God if you say one more word I'm going to slap that smartass right out of your mouth."

Crossing her arms across her chest, Raleigh decided to challenge her mother. She wouldn't dare hit her in front of Dan. Especially not while she was in the hospital.

"You should never swear to God. Isn't that what you always told me?" Raleigh watched as her mother's face hardened and she saw her quickened pulse ticking in her locked jaw. For a frightening moment Raleigh thought she might actually hold good to her word and slap her across the face, regardless of where they were or who was in the room. Then Autumn walked in carrying a bag with Raleigh's clothes in it and she could breathe again. Her mother's attention, for the moment, was now directed at the chirpy blond announcing that Raleigh no longer had to wear the drafty, ugly hospital gown.

Stopping mid-stride, Autumn cut her sentence short when she noticed the strong hostility in the room.

"Thanks Autumn. Can you help me to the bathroom? My legs still kinda feel like jello." Raleigh cut the uncomfortable silence and put her arm around Autumn as she stumbled to the bathroom to change.

As Autumn helped Raleigh in the bathroom, the nurse came to the room and told her parents they could go fill out the release forms. When Raleigh was done changing, she and Autumn went back and sat on her bed, waiting for her release.

Dan noticed how Raleigh was avoiding his gaze and he couldn't help but to hope it was out of embarrassment for how she and her mother were towards one another. When Raleigh had actually spoken of her mother, all she'd ever said was they weren't as close as she and her father were. Even when he'd spoken to Deb he'd had no idea things were that bad between them. When Deb and Keith re-entered the room, the resentment emanating from Raleigh was so strong Dan felt exhausted having only witnessed it.

"Can I go now?" Keith looked at his youngest child and gave her a reassuring smile.

"Soon. Doctor Richards wants to speak with you first."

"Ok." Raleigh agreed but she didn't really understand why. He couldn't tell her anything she didn't already know. All she wanted to do was to go back to the dorm, lay in her bed and get some more, much needed, sleep that was hopefully void of any nightmares. She was sick and tired of fighting. Tired of fighting off her feelings of fear that Effron might show up again, fighting her mother because she could never trust her. She was just so sick of everything at this point.

Couldn't everyone just leave her alone?

After about ten more minutes of waiting, Richards finally came into the room to speak with Raleigh. He told her just to take it easy for the next few days and get as much rest as possible, which of course she knew. He tore off a piece of paper from his clipboard and began to hand it to Raleigh.

"Now, I don't think you'll need it, but if you get uncomfortable or get any more pain in your face, just take some of this and lie down for a little while. Its of a very low dosage but it will help. Your bruises are healing quite nicely so like I said, you might not need anything."

Before Raleigh could take the prescription from the doctor her mother ripped it out of his hand.

"I don't think she'll be needing that."

Gritting her teeth, Raleigh tried not to stand up and rip the paper out of her mother's hands. "Excuse me, but I believe that decision is my own to make, Mother."

"And I might agree with you if you weren't in here because you overdosed on drugs."

"I'm not a fucking pill-popper and you might know that if you paid even a tiny bit of attention or interest in my life!" It took everything Raleigh had not to punch her mother right in the face. She'd taken a lot of things from her throughout the years, but if Deb thought for one second Raleigh was going to take her calling her an addict right to her face, in front of a friend and her new boyfriend, she was seriously mistaken.

"Ok, look, I just want to get Raleigh out of here, you guys can work out whatever problems you have then. Ok?" When Raleigh and Deb nodded their understanding, Doctor Richards continued to tell Raleigh he wanted to see her again at the end of the week if she didn't have a doctor of her own. He proceeded to tell her to be very careful and gave her his personal cell phone number if she needed anything at all.

Keith and Dan thanked him and shook his hand, then they finally began to exit the hospital.

"Dan, you don't mind taking us to the dorm so we can drop off Raleigh, do you?"

"Of course not, sir."

"Dan, please, call me Keith." He gave him a warm smile that Dan couldn't help but to return.

"Keith." He nodded at the older man.

"Daddy, you don't need to make Dan bring you all the way to the dorm. Autumn drove so I can just go back with her and you can go back to Dan's and get some sleep."

Keith put his arm around Raleigh and she immediately wrapped hers around his waist, snuggling into his warmth. "you sure?"

"Positive. I'll call you later. Maybe we can go get some dinner or something." Raleigh's voice dropped and Keith noticed she'd closed her eyes as she leaned against him for support.

"I would like that, but first you need to get some more sleep."

"I'm not tired." She mumbled as a yawn came out of her mouth, causing him to let out a chuckle.

"Sure you're not." Raleigh hugged her father and kissed him on the cheek when they were saying goodbye. She did the same with Dan, but when it came to her mother she just looked at her, said a cold goodbye and turned away to get into Autumn's car.

As soon as they were back in their dorm room, Raleigh turned to Autumn. "Tell me the truth. How bad is it?"

Autumn didn't have to ask what she meant. She knew she was asking about the bruises on her face. She tried to smile as encouragingly as she could but failed miserably. "It looks fine." Raleigh gave her a look as if calling her bluff and Autumn sighed, going further into the room while taking off her jacket. "It's still really dark but it looks a lot better than it did two days ago. Besides, you can probably cover most of it with some of my amazing cover-up skills."

Raleigh gave Autumn a small smile before turning to her dresser. "I have to take a shower so I guess I might as well get it over with." Grabbing a fresh pair of pajamas, Raleigh went into the bathroom and started the shower. After undressing, she stepped under the stream of hot water, unable to stand the grimy feeling on her hair and skin any longer.

As she stood there under the hot water, she closed her eyes and tried to relax, but she couldn't. Every time she closed her eyes he was there, touching her, feeling her, hurting her...raping her over and over. Even the droplets of water running down her body felt like his hands on her, burning their imprints onto her flesh. She felt dizzy and nauseous. Opening her eyes, Raleigh looked at the light bruises on her wrists from where he'd held her so tight. They weren't as bruised as she was sure her face was but they still were visible, they still hurt. Although she was sure the pain was more mental than physical.

When Raleigh felt the first set of sobs wrack her body she couldn't help but to be glad she was alone. She didn't want people to feel sorry for her, she didn't want their pity because something horrible happened to her that happened to girls everyday. But most of all, she didn't want to seem weak for crying over something that she was sure she could have prevented from happening.

As she cried harder and harder, she slowly slid down the shower wall into a heap on the floor. She sat there long after her tears had stopped mixing with the shower water and it had run ice cold. But the cold of the water wasn't enough to make her move. She only snapped out if it when she heard Autumn's worried banging on the bathroom door.

Standing up, Raleigh turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around her body as she stepped out. Going to the door, she opened it a crack and peered out into Autumn's worried eyes.

"I'm sorry, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "I'll be out in a minute."

"Ok."

After closing the door, Raleigh was sure to lock it. As she stood in front of the mirror, she lifted her hand and wiped away the condensation, slowly revealing her reflection. She stood there for a few seconds just staring at her discolored skin.

How could he have done this to her?

As a tear rolled down her cheek, Raleigh could feel the bile rise in her throat. Turning away from her distorted reflection, Raleigh kneeled in front of the toilet just in time to wretch up the little food she'd eaten at the hospital.

When her stomach was finally empty, she flushed the toilet and rinsed it down. After thoroughly brushing her teeth and rinsing with mouthwash, Raleigh finished drying off and got dressed. After running a brush through her hair, she opened the door and went over to her bed.

"Gonna crash?"

"Yeah." Raleigh mumbled as she fell into her sheets.

"Alright. I don't want to disturb you so I'm going to go down to Ember's room."

"K." Grabbing her purse and heading to the door, Autumn stopped and looked back to Raleigh. "Are you going to be ok here alone?"

"I'll be fine, Autumn. Go." With that, she nodded and left the room, being sure to lock the door behind herself.

Leaving her bedside lamp on, Raleigh snuggled into her blankets and closed her eyes, slowly falling into a deep sleep.

---

The ride back to the house was silent and incredibly uncomfortable. Somehow, everything Dan thought of to say just didn't seem right after what had happened at the hospital. Once they were inside, Deb said she was going to go lay down. After hanging up his jacket, Dan motioned to the kitchen.

"I was thinking about making myself a cup of tea. Would you like one?"

Nodding, Keith followed him into the kitchen. "A cup of tea sounds great right now. Hell, a shot of whiskey sounds even better."

Giving Keith a smile, Dan let out a laugh. "Well, I have both. How about we mix them?"

Keith pointed at Dan. "Good man." Taking a seat at the island, Keith watched Dan fill the tea kettle and set it on the stove. "Dan, on behalf of my wife and daughter, I'd like to apologize to you for their behavior."

"Hey, its fine. I'm not a stranger to family feuds."

"Oh? You and your parents fight a lot?"

Turning to put the tea bags in the mugs, Dan nodded.

"Yeah, we did. Although it was mainly me and my father. He wanted me to be a jock in school and I wanted to sing and dance. So of course in his mind that made me gay and he just wouldn't have that." The tea kettle whistled and Dan turned off the burner before pouring the hot water into the mugs.

"So I'm noting the past tense. He finally accept you for who you are?" Dan let out a laugh as he set a mug in front of Keith and went to take a bottle of whiskey out of the cupboard to his left.

"No. Actually they both died before they accepted me."

"I'm sorry, Daniel."

"It's ok. I've had a long time to get over it."

"I know how it is to have your parents wanting a different future for you than you want for yourself." Keith gave him a warm smile as he added some whiskey to his tea.

"Is that why Raleigh gets along with you so well?" Keith cast an amused look his way before responding.

"I think so. They used to get along really well until she started running off with Josh every night. I think it reminds her of us when we were younger and our parents hated how we ended up."

"How's that?"

"Seventeen, pregnant and a wedding I barely remember."

"But Raleigh did almost end up like that." Dan watched as a look of shock passed over Keith's face.

"She told you about that?"

Dan nodded. "She did."

Sighing, Keith set down his mug and chose his words carefully. "I do not condone abortion in any way, and don't get me wrong, I am a happy man who loves my wife. But I am glad Raleigh did it. Joshua had broken up with her and I wanted her to get out of Shelby Forrest. If she'd had the baby she would have had to turn this school down. I didn't want her to give up her dream that easily."

"Somehow I feel like she'd make it either way."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Keith brought up the house.

"This really is an amazing house. How can you afford it on the salary of a professor alone?"

"I can't." Dan let out a small laugh. "This house has been in my family for about twelve generations now I think. It's completely paid off and I inherited my family's fortune as well as my father's business."

"You teach, run a business and still have time for a personal life? I commend you."

"Thanks, but I'm not sure I deserve it. I sold the business about a year ago to a close friend that knows more about it than I do. Besides, it's doing much better than it was when I'd been the owner."

"Oh well. To each man his own, huh?"

"Yep." After finishing off their tea they both decided to head up to bed.

As soon as Dan lied down on his bed and closed his eyes, he felt his exhaustion fully for the first time. Burying himself in his blankets and pillows, Dan allowed the darkness to seep over him, pulling him into his first dreamless sleep in weeks.

---

What was that?

It sort of felt like a spider crawling up her leg. Shaking it off, Raleigh rolled onto her side and tried to go back to sleep. But there it was again, slowly inching up her leg. She shook it again to rid herself of the irritating insect, only this time it didn't let go. It continued its journey up her leg until it was mid-thigh. Slowly opening her eyes, Raleigh moved to slap the spider, but as soon as she sat up, she realized too late that it wasn't a spider on her leg.

It was Effron.

Her blanket was thrown to the floor and he was hunched over her, trying to push apart her legs.

Gasping, Raleigh scurried away from the madman and cowered at the top of her bed. Bringing her knees up to her chest, she tried to calm herself as he slowly began to move towards her once again. There was a look in his eyes, almost like a tiger closing in on his prey and she was merely a field mouse - his for the taking.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was soft and shaky. She knew he got pleasure out of the fact that she was afraid of him, but she didn't care.

"Reclaiming what's mine. Finishing what you started."

"Everyone knows what you did to me. I could scream and they'd be here in two seconds." Her threat was useless against him and she knew it, but she had to say something.

A sadistic smile curled his lips as he moved even closer. He didn't stop until he was nearly on top of her.

"True, but then why aren't you screaming?" Before she could do anything, he'd crushed his lips down on her own, weighing her down to the bed with his body. She felt him everywhere. On her legs, her stomach, her breasts. She began sobbing, trying to fight him off, but she was far too weak.

He was going to get what he wanted and she was helpless to stop it.

---

Autumn and Ember sat in Ember's room, the only sound filling the room coming from the television. Neither paid attention to the infomercial lighting the screen as they sat in silence, trying to think of what to say or do. Autumn was still having a hard time believing everything that had happened in the past couple of days and Ember was trying to be supportive. Sure, when Raleigh had first come to Hollywood Academy Of The Arts she'd thought of her as nothing more than a talent-less hick who never should have come. But now she considered her a friend, and she'd never wanted something like this to happen to her. She couldn't believe Effron had done it when Autumn had first told her. He'd always seemed like such a normal guy. A great guy actually. A guy that every girl wanted a chance to be with.

How many of those girls had he drugged and raped?

How many times had he gotten away with being a sick and twisted freak because the girl was too ashamed and scared to come forward?

Out of the corner of her eye, Ember noticed Autumn leap to her feet, staring forward like a cat listening to something only she could hear.

"Did you hear that?"

"What?" Standing up, Ember turned off the TV and listened to the silence with Autumn, but then she too heard it.

A blood curdling scream filled the silence and Autumn looked at Ember. "Raleigh!" Within seconds they were out of the room and running down the hallway, standing in front of the dorm. Autumn pulled out her keys and tried as fast as she could to unlock the door while more screams filled the air. Finally she'd unlocked the door and she swung it in, running to Raleigh's side.

She was there, alone, getting more twisted in her blanket and sheet as she convulsed on the bed. Immediately leaning down, Autumn called out her name, trying to calm her thrashing body.

"Raleigh! Raleigh, honey wake up!" Slowly Raleigh's body calmed and she woke up, immediately sitting up and throwing her arms around Autumn's neck, holding her tight.

"He was here! Autumn, he was here!" She cried into her neck, refusing to let her friend go.

Unsure of what to do, Autumn ran her hand up and down Raleigh's back, trying to calm her. "Raleigh, you need to calm down. Nobody is here. You're fine...you're fine." She kept her voice soft and even, not daring to let Raleigh go. Looking to the doorway, Autumn noticed how everyone on their floor was there, trying to get in to see what was going on.

"Everyone, get out! This isn't a freak show." Ember yelled, slamming the door shut and locking it.

Raleigh sat there, crying on Autumn's shoulder for a few minutes before finally pulling away. She wiped her eyes and Ember handed her a box of tissues. Raleigh thanked her and blew her nose, continuing to wipe her cheeks dry of any stray tears.

"Are you all right?" Autumn asked, continuing to run her hand up and down her back in slow circles.

Raleigh shook her head, unable to look at either Autumn or Ember. "Not even close." Her voice was raspy as she spoke and she hiccupped through unshed tears.

"Can we get you anything?" Ember asked, unsure of what to do with herself.

Raleigh pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She rested her forehead on her knees and tried to stop shaking as she nodded her head no. She didn't know of anything that could possibly make her feel better or any less frightened than she did.

"What about Dan? Do you want me to take you over there?"

Go to Dan‘s? Raleigh wondered if that would really help, but then she realized, aside from Autumn, he was the one who stood by her constantly. She was sure he'd never left her side at the hospital, and despite the last time they'd really spoken, well fought really, she missed him. She had always felt safe with him. She knew now that all she really wanted was to be in his arms again, if only for a moment, and kiss him like she hadn't been able to in days.

Unwrapping her arms from around her legs, Raleigh looked around the room. "Where's my phone? I want to call him."

Putting her hand on Raleigh's shoulder, Autumn gently pushed her down. "Calm down. I'll go call him." Standing up, Autumn cast a glance towards Ember before leaving the room, she hated talking on the phone in front of people. Pulling out her cellular phone, Autumn scrolled down to Dan's name and hit call.

Hearing his phone vibrating against the wood of his nightstand, Dan rolled over and picked up the object, squinting at the screen. Seeing that it was Autumn he flipped it open and put it to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey Dan. Did I wake you up?"

"Yes." Pinching the bridge of his nose, Dan closed his eyes and tried not to fall back into his deep sleep that had been interrupted. "What's up Autumn?"

He noticed her slight hesitation and immediately he knew what this was about. Suddenly he wasn't so tired anymore.

"Its Raleigh."

"What about her?" Dan sat up in his bed and reached over to turn the lamp on.

"She's kinda freaking out. She had a bad nightmare about Effron."

"Is she all right?" It may have been just a nightmare, but he remembered his own the night of Autumn's party. He could still feel how it had made him feel so he could only imagine how this had affected Raleigh.

"Not really. She wants to go over there. I think she'd feel better if she's with you."

"Tell her I'll be there as soon as I can." He was already out of bed and getting dressed.

"Dan, you can't come here. It's the dorm."

"I'm well aware of that, Autumn, but I'm not gonna let her take a cab."

"I can take her." she offered.

"Thanks but no. I'll be there in like ten minutes." He hung up before she could protest anymore and Autumn sighed, closing her own phone before putting it back in her pocket. Opening the dorm door, Autumn saw Raleigh throwing some clothes into a bag. She looked over at her as she entered.

"Did you call him?"

"Yeah. He'll be here in like ten minutes to get you." Autumn immediately saw the panic pass in her eyes.

"He can't come here!"

"I know that, Raleigh, but I don't think he really cares. He was very adamant about picking you up."

"Who is Dan?" Ember asked in curious confusion. She'd had no idea Raleigh was seeing someone other than Effron.

Sighing, Raleigh ran her hand through her hair and fell to her bed. "A guy I've been seeing for a few weeks now."

"Do I know him?" Autumn and Raleigh looked at each other, wondering if they should clue her in on just who Dan was. In the beginning of the semester Raleigh would have never even contemplated telling Ember something like this. But now...now she was different. She knew she could trust her not to tell anyone.

"Mr. Cooper." Raleigh waited for some sign of shock to form on her face but it never came.

"You know what? I don't know why I didn't realize that before."

"Why's that?" Autumn asked.

"Because, he's asking you to stay after class all the time, I always noticed little glances exchanged between you two...wow. I feel kinda stupid now." Ember let out a small laugh as she picked up a pillow and plopped down on the futon.

"You're not going to tell anyone are you?" Raleigh asked in worry. Maybe she'd been wrong about Ember.

"Hell no." Ember waved a hand in front of her face dismissively. "You pulled the stick out of his ass. I'm grateful to you. Besides, I think you two make a cute couple."

Raleigh gave Ember a small smile. "Thanks, Em."

"Well that was a nice bonding moment but I think we should get Raleigh outside to wait for Dan. We don't want him coming up here."

Raleigh and Ember agreed and after throwing another shirt in her bag, Autumn picked it up and they all left the room and headed down to the parking lot to wait for Dan.

They had been waiting in the dark parking lot for about seven minutes when Raleigh spotted Dan's car pulling in the entrance.

"There he is." Standing up from their seat on the steps, Raleigh waved to him so he would know she was waiting outside for him. He pulled right up to the girls and threw the car into park before getting out and running to Raleigh.

"Are you ok?" His arms wrapped around her instantly and he pulled her into him. She could hear his rapid heart beat through his shirt, feel his worry for her from the way his arms tightened around her. Closing her eyes, Raleigh hugged him back just as tightly, trying not to let the tears overpower her once again.

"I'm fine, Dan. Just had a nightmare, that's all." She tried to make herself believe the lie but she knew she failed miserably. When he finally released her, he reached his hand up and wiped away the single tear that had fallen.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah." Raleigh turned to Autumn and Ember and gave them each a hug before picking up her bag. "Bye guys, thanks."

She turned back to the car and began walking towards it while Dan waved to the girls. "Bye girls."

"Bye." They called back, waving to both of them.

As they stood there, watching the tail lights get further away, Ember broke the silence. "They really do make a cute couple."

"Yeah, they do." Was all Autumn could think of to say as they turned away and went back upstairs.

Aside from Dan asking once again if Raleigh was all right, the ride back to his house remained silent between them. Raleigh listened to the soft melody streaming from the radio as she leaned her forehead against the cool glass of the window.

When he pulled into the driveway and put the car into park, Raleigh wasted no time in getting out and grabbing her bag from the backseat. When she came to the front of the house she stopped and just looked up at it. When Dan got to her side he asked if something was wrong. She didn't remove her gaze from the house.

"She asleep?"

"Yeah, they both were when I left." He knew she only cared if her mother was sleeping but he still mentioned her father.

"Good." she finally moved towards the front door and waited patiently for Dan to unlock it. When they walked in, Raleigh wasted no time in heading to the stairs. When they were at the top they both stopped, knowing the other was thinking the same thing.

Finally looking at Dan, Raleigh didn't know what to say. But she didn't have to say anything.

"I guess you better stay in a guest bedroom." Biting her lip, Raleigh nodded.

"I guess so. Goodnight, Dan."

"Goodnight, Raleigh." turning away, Raleigh headed down the hallway to the bedroom she would stay in. She could feel Dan's eyes boring into her back and about halfway to the bedroom she stopped walking. Closing her eyes, Raleigh tried to gain the strength to keep going but she couldn't. Turning around, she ran back to where Dan stood.

Opening his arms, Dan immediately enveloped her and picked her up, planting his lips on hers. Kissing him with everything in her, Raleigh couldn't stop her tears. She knew that she was crying a lot more than she had in a long time, but she didn't really care. She felt such complete relief from being in his arms again that she just couldn't hide it.

Dan moved them into his bedroom and shut the door behind them. Setting Raleigh down, he removed his lips from hers but didn't release her hold. He needed to feel her against him right now. He needed the reassurance that she was really there with him and not still passed out in the hospital.

"I am so sorry, Dan." Raleigh whispered to him through her sobs.

Pulling away, Dan placed his hands on the sides of her face. "Baby, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"Yes I do. I should have listened to you. I never should have set foot near that party." Wrapping his arms around her shaking body once again, Dan closed his eyes.

"Shh, it's all right. You're fine now. Everything is going to be ok. I promise."

"I hope so." Pulling away from Dan, Raleigh just looked into his beautiful green eyes. "Will you just hold me tonight? I don't want to be alone."

"You don't have to ask." Taking off his sweater and jeans, he crawled into bed with Raleigh. Once they were under the covers, Raleigh immediately curled up next to him and closed her eyes. For the first time in too long, she finally felt at peace.

She finally felt truly loved.

---

Slowly coming to a state of consciousness, Raleigh regrettably opened her eyes. When she saw that darkness still filled the room, she rolled over to look at the digital clock on the nightstand. When she saw that the red numbers read 3:17 am, she let out a low groan as she sat up. She knew sleep would not come to her again so soon so she decided it was best to just give in and get out of bed.

Turning her head, Raleigh's eyes searched out Dan's body through the shadows. A small smile crept onto her face when she located his naked back slowly moving up and down with his steady breathing. Leaning over, Raleigh tried as best as she could not to disturb him as she gently placed her lips to his warm skin.

How was it possible to love someone so much having only known them such a short time?

Sighing softly, Raleigh stood up off the bed and slowly moved along the wooden floor towards the doorway. She carefully opened and closed the door so she wouldn't wake him with the low creaking. Once she was out in the hallway she began walking normally as she made her way through the dark to and down the large staircase that led to the kitchen. As soon as her bare feet touched the linoleum floor, Raleigh reached to her left and searched out the light switch. Light immediately illuminated the room and Raleigh headed over to the refrigerator. She had planned on just grabbing a glass of orange juice but as she gazed at the contents of Dan's fridge, Raleigh felt, and heard, her stomach give a hearty growl. She couldn't remember the last time she'd actually really eaten so she decided she'd better eat something. After taking out the milk, Raleigh closed the door to the refrigerator and headed over to her favorite cupboard - the one concealing her stash of cocoa pebbles and fruit loops.

Choosing on cocoa pebbles, she pulled out a box and turned to another cupboard for a bowl. As an afterthought, Raleigh turned back and grabbed another bowl and spoon and set them next to where she was sitting at the island. While she was pouring herself some cereal, she heard someone's footsteps coming closer to the kitchen. Smiling to herself, Raleigh set down the box of cereal and uncapped the milk. When she was done pouring her milk, she sat the jug down and turned around, leaning against the counter. Not even two seconds later her father stumbled in, rubbing sleep from his eyes. When he spotted Raleigh standing there, his movements completely stopped.

"Raleigh? What are you doing here?"

Picking up her bowl of cocoa pebbles, Raleigh smiled at her father. He looked as if he were only a boy, standing there in his robe and tasseled hair.

"I sometimes break into people's homes for cocoa pebbles." She took a bite as she turned and sat down. Keith made his way to the island and sat beside her. Eyeing the extra bowl he smiled at her.

"Expecting someone?"

Raleigh gave him a warm smile. "Always."

Keith returned his daughter's smile and began pouring himself a bowl. "So what I meant was when did you get here."

"A few hours ago. I got a little spooked so Autumn called Dan and ten minutes later he was there picking me up."

Keith raised a questioning eyebrow at her. "Are you sure that was wise?"

"No but Autumn said he insisted. He knows what would happen if we were caught." She said the last so softly, Keith's heart went out to her. He could tell when his baby girl was in love, and he knew now more than ever that she was head over heels crazy for the boy.

"So how are you feeling? Really?" after drinking the last of her milk turned chocolate, Raleigh looked at her dad.

"Honestly? I think it's going to be a while before I can be alone and not afraid he's going to show up. But I'm doing ok."

Keith smiled as he rubbed Raleigh's back soothingly. "You're strong. There's not one doubt in my mind that you'll get through this just fine." Deciding to change the subject, Keith stood up and put their dishes in the sink. "How about we watch some TV?"

Raleigh's face immediately lit up as she stood and grabbed her father's hand to pull him towards the living room. "Oh, Daddy, you have to see Dan's DVD collection! He has to have every musical ever made."

Keith allowed Raleigh to pull him along like he always had at Christmas time when she'd been a child believing Santa has just delivered hundreds of presents just for her.

"Yeah? What about Singing In The Rain?"

"Well, that is a musical isn't it?" Keith put his hand on the back of Raleigh's neck and gave it a light squeeze.

"Oh you're such a comedian."

"You've known me for eighteen years and just now figuring this out?" Keith just smiled and shook his head. For the moment he felt like he actually had his little girl back. It felt good.

Sitting down on the large, comfortable couch, Keith waited as Raleigh searched for their movie of choice and put it into the DVD player. Then she snuggled up to him under the afghan and together they watched the musical play out on the flat screen. They hadn't even gotten through "Fit as a Fiddle" before they were both passed out.

Raleigh felt like she'd only been asleep an hour when she felt herself being shaken awake followed by her mother's voice. She felt her father shift and she was forced to open her eyes a bit. When the morning's sun rays hit her pupils she immediately groaned and shut them once again.

"Come on, it's a brand new beautiful day. Get up so we can all eat breakfast like a family." Sitting up, Raleigh rubbed the back of her neck slightly before standing up and stretching out her cramped muscles.

"What time is it?" Raleigh groaned out, barely opening her eyes.

"Nine." Raleigh stopped mid-stretch and looked at Dan.

"Really?" He gave her a bemused look and nodded. They'd all actually gotten some much needed sleep. Raleigh smiled at Dan and before she could do anything else, she felt a hand touch her face and she immediately shied away.

"Raleigh, calm down. I just want to look at your eye." Her mother sounded exasperated as she stepped forward and moved her hair out of her eyes. "It looks much better. How does it feel?"

"Fine." So Deborah wanted to play the worried parent now? After everything she'd said yesterday to Raleigh? She wasn't going to let her. She knew better than to think her mother was just plain worried and didn't have an ulterior motive. She'd learned that the hard way.

Backing away from her mother's touch, Raleigh cleared her throat and headed towards the kitchen. "So what's for breakfast?"

"Bacon, eggs, toast, sausage, hash browns, and as per your mother's request, grits." Raleigh couldn't help the laugh that escaped her throat at the expression on Dan's face when he said grits.

"What's the matter with grits?" Raleigh asked innocently as she followed everyone into the kitchen.

"Just look at them! They look like...I don't know. Gruel. Only whiter." now it was Keith's turn to laugh.

"Son, you would never last in the south. Grits are a delicacy down there."

"I'll be sure to remember that when I visit." Going over to where Dan had set all the breakfast supplies, Raleigh grabbed the can of grits.

"Want some help?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Nope." Raleigh gave him a smile that he couldn't help but to return.

"Well, then I would love some help." Deb and Keith both helped and within ten minutes they were all sitting down eating their large southern breakfast. Dan noticed, with thanks, that Deb and Raleigh hadn't argued even once while they ate. Unfortunately, it didn't last very long.

"Alright, Keith and I will clean up and do the dishes and all that. Raleigh, Dan is going to take you back to the dorm so you can pack your things."

Raleigh stopped her movement at her mother's words. She just stood there, staring at her as she took plates off the island top.

"Pack?" Deb spared a quick glance at her daughter as she continued to clear off the table.

"Yes. Everything. You're going back home with us. Our flight leaves at one." Raleigh could only stand there and stare at her mother as if she'd completely lost her mind. How could she possibly expect her to leave a week early? And what did she mean by everything? She was coming back next semester, that's how she'd planned it. "Raleigh, why are you standing there? You only have a couple hours. Get going."

"No." Raleigh furrowed her eyebrows in confusion and, mostly, anger as she shook her head at her mother.

"Excuse me?" Deb stopped what she was doing and turned to look at her daughter, sure she had misheard her.

"No, Mother. I'm not going with you."

"Yes you are. Go and pack."

"I'm not going to run away! I have two more finals to take and then I will be home next week. Then I'm coming back to finish the second semester. I started this, I'm going to see it through. I cannot believe you would ask me to turn away from this."

"I'm not asking. I'm telling. This obviously isn't the place for you. If it were, you would have been paying more attention to class instead of drugs."

"How dare you come here and pretend to think that you know everything that's been going on. You don't know a thing! And you're never going to control me so stop trying to! I'm not Janie, the golden child who can't do any wrong in your eyes. I'm not going to bow to your every command like some bitch!" Looking at her mother with defiance, she wasn't surprised to see her clenching her fists shut. She knew her mother would never lay a hand on her, and maybe she used that to her advantage, maybe she didn't, but she wasn't going to back down.

"I've had enough of your shit, Raleigh Jean! You are going home with us. I'm not going to allow you to stay here and destroy your life anymore."

"Well you know what? It's my life, and if I'm destroying it then that's my problem." Raleigh turned and ran out of the house, not even bothering to grab her purse. All she wanted was to get out and away from her controlling mother. It completely boggled her mind how her mother could be so cruel to her. She'd never so much as raised her voice to her brothers or Janie but it seemed like she'd always gotten the brunt of her anger. No matter what she did it was always the same with her mother. Nothing she could ever do was right or good enough for her.

"Raleigh! Raleigh, will you hold up a minute?"

"Go back to your house, Dan." Before she could go any farther, Dan was in front of her, his hands on her arms, forcing her to stop walking.

"Stop." Staring up into Dan's green eyes, Raleigh tried her hardest not to break down and fall into his arms.

"Ok, I'm stopped. What do you want?" As Dan looked into Raleigh's lilac eyes he tried to think of what he could possibly say to her. Somehow ‘I'm sorry your mom is such a bitch towards you' just didn't seem like enough. He just didn't understand why they were always at one another's throats. Had it always been like this? How could one person harbor such animosity towards their own daughter? "What Dan? What did you want to say to me? Did you want to defend her? Well go ahead! Be like all the rest of them and blame me for how she treats me." When he just looked at her, a sad look written across his face, Raleigh lost any control she might have still possessed. "Go ahead!" Clenching her hands into fists, she began pounding on his chest relentlessly, yelling and screaming, not giving a second thought that neighbors might hear. "Blame me! Defend her! Do it!" Dan did nothing but wrap his arms around her shaking body, refusing to let her go as she fought against him. She wasn't angry at him, she was angry her mother and he knew that.

Eventually she broke down into tears, losing all strength to stand on her own. As she collapsed against Dan, she would have fallen straight to the ground had he not been there to hold her up.

With an arm around her waist, Dan held her to him, gently stroking her hair trying to calm her sobs. "Shh, it's alright, I've got you. I've got you." Putting his arm under her knees, Dan picked her up and carried her to his car. After helping her inside he told her he'd be right back to take her to the dorm. After closing the door, he went back inside the house to put on his jacket.

"Are you taking her back to the dorm?" Keith asked upon seeing Dan's re-entry.

"Yes sir."

"Good, make sure she packs." Deb told him, a bit of attitude dripping from her words.

After situating his jacket on himself and grabbing Raleigh‘s purse, Dan looked Deb straight in the eye so she would feel the full brunt of his words. "With all do respect, Mrs. Coons. Raleigh is an adult now and she'll do whatever is it she wants."

Stepping forward, Deb tried to stop Dan before he walked out the front door. "Excuse me, but who the hell..."

"Shut up, Deborah!" Deb immediately shut her mouth and looked at her husband in surprise. He'd never so much as raised his voice to her. She was clearly astonished. "Daniel is right. Stop trying to run her life."

"Thank you, Keith." Turning around, Dan once again left his home and got into his car. He didn't bother saying two words to Raleigh. He'd known her long enough to know that if there was one thing that could calm her down, it was music. Fortunately he was the same way.

Turning the radio to WKSE, Dan turned the volume up and they sat together, never saying a word, just allowing the beat to work its therapeutic magic on their moods.

When he'd pulled into the parking lot of Raleigh's dorm, he parked and stopped the car, never looking over at her. They sat in silence, neither looking at the other, for nearly five minutes before Raleigh spoke up.

"I'm sorry, Dan."

Startled by her sudden voice, Dan jumped slightly and allowed his eyes to roam over her face. "For what?"

"Everything." She continued to gaze forward as if in some sort of daze. He didn't know what to say to her so he just allowed the silence to coat them once again. Out of the corner of his eye he caught her head moving to look out the window. "I guess I should go up before someone sees you."

"I'm not worried about that, Raleigh. Go up when you're ready to." Finally, Raleigh turned to look at Dan. He watched as she bit down on her bottom lip as if debating over something. Eventually she leaned over and wrapped her arms around him as best as she could.

"Thank you." Letting go of him, she turned and open the door. Stepping out she looked back at him. "I'll see you later." Dan offered her a half-hearted smile and a wave before she began walking up to the building. He stayed there until he saw her go in and then he started the car and headed back to his home turned chaotic.

---

When Raleigh parent's had finally left for their flight back home, Dan was beside himself. Part of him, the larger part, couldn't have been happier to be rid of Deb. But the other part, smaller but terribly heavy weighing on his shoulders, wished there was something he could have done to improve the relationship between Deb and Raleigh. She was her youngest daughter, her youngest child. Surely she didn't hate her as much as she let on? Shaking his head, Dan dismissed all thoughts of the wretched woman from his mind. They'd been gone for over twenty-four hours now, he refused to give it another thought.

Finally allowing himself to truly relax, Dan went over to his cupboard that contained his best liquor and poured himself a glass of aged brandy. Holding the glass to his nose, Dan inhaled the sweet scent of the French Marc before losing himself in a sip of the fine grape taste. He knew it to be an acquired taste, much like most red wines, but still he knew it to be his favorite. As the warming liquid rolled over his tongue and down his throat, warming his insides slowly, he closed his eyes, reveling in the instant relaxation it brought him. Putting the glass to his lips, Dan finished what he'd poured himself and set down the glass. Fully intent on pouring himself another, Dan sighed in exasperation when his phone began to ring.

Setting down the bottle of the Pomace brandy, Dan moved to answer his telephone as it continued to ring noisily.

"Hello?" With the mood he was in, he wondered how it was possible he sounded none-the-worse when he'd answered.

"Daniel, how are you my boy?" Dean Farsely's chipper voice came over the line and Dan immediately felt guilt at having wished horrible things to come of the person who dared to interrupt his quiet home.

"I'm good, Scott. And you?"

"Well, I suppose I could be a little better. Listen, are you busy at the moment?"

"No, not at all." Well, is was sort of the truth.

"Glad to hear it. Could you possibly come to the office? I'd like to have a chat with you." As soon as the words had left the man's lips Dan knew it couldn't be good.

"Scott, what is it?"

"What do you mean?"

"Don't play mind games with me. I've known you my entire life. I can tell by your tone something's up and it most likely isn't good so spit it out." Dan heard a long sigh come from the other end of the line and knew he'd hit right on the button.

"Dan," All the happiness was gone from his voice. "I'm serious when I say we need to talk. Although I feel this will be a conversation best suited for face-to-face. Can you get here?" Pinching the bridge of his nose, Dan tried to will away the sudden headache that was coming on.

"Sure. I'll be there in about ten minutes."

"Great. See you then." Clicking off the phone, Dan tried to ease the tension from his neck. What was this about? By the way Scott had sounded it certainly didn't seem as though it was a conversation he really wanted to have. Which of course made Dan feel like running for the mountains.

Looking longingly at his abandoned bottle of brandy, Dan simply shook his head before grabbing his jacket and car keys and heading out to his car. On the short drive to the college Dan's mind swam with possible reasons for Scott's sudden interest in having a chat with him. The only thing that his mind kept coming back to seemed to be the most logical.

Raleigh.

Walking towards Scott's office, Dan stopped to smile at his secretary. "Good afternoon, Mae. How are we doing today?"

"Well hello there, sugar." Mae's voice lowered as she smiled widely at him. She was in her mid-fifties and was a little round around the tummy, but she was the biggest sweetheart he'd ever known. "I'm doin' good. How about you?" Her southern drawl, courtesy of growing up in Williamsburg, Virginia, dripped from every word.

"Well, I guess we'll find out in a minute. Scott wanted to see me." Dan plastered a fake smile on his face and knew Mae saw right through it in an instant.

"Yes he did." He noticed something flicker in her eyes but he couldn't be sure what it was. Sadness? Pity? "You can go right on in there, Darlin' ."

"Thanks, Mae." Dan gave her one last smile before turning from her desk and opening the door to Scott's office. When he entered the large office, he noticed the man was on the phone, seemingly losing his patience, so Dan simply shut the door behind himself and sat on as chair that sat in front of Scott's desk.

When he finished with his phone call, Scott stood and went over to the bookcases lining the wall. Pulling out a book that resembled a large dictionary, Dan watched as he opened it and pulled out a bottle of scotch.

"I know it's against the rules to hold alcohol in a school, but I never was a stickler for rules."

"Always the rebel." Dan smiled at the older man and watched patiently as he poured two glasses, over ice, and handed one to him.

Dan thanked him and took a sip, trying to hide his grimace. He'd never really been one for scotch. He noticed how Scott seemed to be lost in thought so Dan set down his glass rather noisily to regain his attention.

"So, I know you didn't ask me over here the way you did for a glass of scotch. What's up?"

"Dan." There was that damned sigh again. It was going to drive him nuts if he kept it up. "I didn't lie, we do need to talk and I didn't have the heart to do this over the phone." Moving to his desk, Scott sat atop it in front of the younger man. He'd give anything happily not to have to do this.

"You know what? I think I know where this is going." Scott didn't even flinch at the words. He wasn't surprised in the least. Dan was a very bright young man, he'd have to be a complete imbecile not to get at the very least an idea of what was about to come.

"I figured you might." Scott let a moment of silence pass between them as he took another drink of his scotch. "I spoke with the Board earlier this morning. It seems they got wind of your new relationship." Dan just nodded, unable to meet his old friend's eyes. "You know I'd give anything not to do this but I have no choice."

"I know that, Scott. And I'm glad it was you and not the board that did it."

"Thank God for small favors, huh?" Picking up Dan's glass, Scott handed it back to him before holding up his own. "May love prevail." Dan smiled as he clanked his glass with Scott's before finishing off the alcohol.

"Well, I guess I should go clear out my office."

"I suppose so."

Dan walked to the door, but when his hand touched the handle he did not open it. Instead he turned back to face Scott. "Scott? What about Raleigh? Is she expelled?"

"No, son. Just academic probation. They thought expulsion was a bit extreme." Scott just shook his head as he let out a ridiculing laugh. "Expulsion is extreme but termination isn't?" Dan knew the question was one that was only pointed to himself so he turned and left the office, heading to stand in his own for one last time.

He thought it sort if funny. All the times he'd thought about leaving his teaching career, Dan had been filled with such overwhelming sadness. But now, having been fired due to having a relationship with a student, he felt almost relieved.

---

Sitting in the waiting area to see the Dean of the school, Raleigh felt completely horrified. She couldn't keep her hands from shaking or rid herself of the butterflies in her stomach. She felt like she was about to give her first speech in front of a class of about fifty kids. She wanted to run away, cry, hide, and throw up all at the same time. How could she have let this happen? How could she have been so stupid to have gone to that party and then call Dan to pick her up when she knew something was wrong? Of course he'd take her to the hospital. Of course people at the school would suspect their involvement when he picked her up at the dorm when she got scared. Of course someone would turn them in.

What have I done?

Raleigh put her face in her hands and tried to will away the tears. How much trouble was she in? Was Dan fired? Would she be expelled?

Finally the Dean's secretary told Raleigh she could go in and she stood on shaky legs, trying to keep breathing. After everything, she couldn't pass out now. She could deal with whatever the Dean threw her way. If she was expelled she'd leave LA and go back home, no big deal. Far worse things could happen.

Like dying from a drug overdose for instance.

Opening the door, Raleigh peered in and felt her stomach drop once again as soon as her eyes landed on the Dean sitting behind his large oak desk. She'd never met him before but had heard terrible stories about the kind of man he was. She'd heard he was an ex-marine and looking at him now, she didn't doubt that one bit. That man was huge, even for being as old as he was. Sitting there in his black suit with his gray, thinning hair combed and parted to the side, and his glasses that sat on his nose, he looked like Ebenezer Scrooge. What kind of lashing was she going to receive from him today?

Unsure of what to do or say, Raleigh just stood there. Luckily she didn't have to do anything. Dean Farsely spoke before she had the chance.

"Shut the door and take a seat, Ms. Coons." Doing as he said, Raleigh immediately shut the door and took a seat in the big red chair that sat in front of his desk. She nervously bounced her leg and looked anywhere but at him as she waited for him to finish writing whatever it was he was writing and acknowledge her.

Good lord this was worse than any punishment he could evoke upon her.

Finally, after an eternity of leg bouncing, the dean finally put down his pen and took off his glasses. After rubbing his eyes for a second, he looked at Raleigh. Just looked. He didn't speak or even blink for that matter. His old menacing eyes bore into her eyes like fire and she silently begged him to say something.

He finally looked away and stood up from his large, black computer chair and turned toward his window. Hands clasped behind his back, he finally spoke.

"Daniel is like a son to me, Ms. Coons. Did you know that?" He didn't give her time to answer. "His father was my best friend all my life. When they died I took it upon myself to look after him and his trouble-causing cousin. He could always tell me everything, and when he couldn't, I read him like an open book." Turning back around, Dean Farsely walked over to where she sat. "My point is that I naturally knew about your relationship with him. No, it wasn't I who blew you guys in to the board, but unfortunately it is my responsibility to carry out the punishment. As much as I hate it, I must be fair to the other students. I cannot play favoritism. You made Daniel happy and for that I thank you. But regardless, I must tell you that from now until the end of next semester you are placed on Academic probation. One more slip up and you are expelled. Am I clear?"

Unable to speak, Raleigh simply nodded her head that she understood what he was telling her.

"Good. You may go, Ms. Coons." Nodding her head, Raleigh stood up and headed to the door. About halfway there she stopped and turned back.

"Dean Farsely?" Hearing her speak for the first time, Scott looked up at the scared girl.

"Yes?"

"What about D...Mr. Cooper?" She had about called him Dan. Even though this man knew about their relationship, she couldn't bring herself to openly admit it to him.

He knew he wasn't allowed to disclose such information but he did have a soft spot for her...what was he? A boyfriend? A lover? Both? "You have not spoken to Daniel?"

"No sir. I haven't seen him."

"I'm sorry to say that Daniel's employment here a Hollywood Academy of the Arts has been terminated as of yesterday." Standing there stunned for a moment, Raleigh didn't know what to do. She had expected it, but it was still hard to hear. "Good day, Ms. Coons."

Turning around, Raleigh left the office and ran down the stairs and left the building. She had to go see Dan. She had to speak to him. She ran the few blocks to his home and rang the doorbell twice. As she waited for him to answer, she tried to swallow back the tears. There was so much raw emotion running throughout her, so many things she wanted to say to him. But as soon as he opened the door and she looked at him for the first time since she and her mother had fought, all thoughts left her. A soft "hey" was all she could manage.

"Hey. Come on in." Dan waited for her to walk in past him before he shut the door. God she looked heart broken.

"I had a meeting with the Dean today."

"Did you?" Nodding her head, Raleigh hugged her arms around herself, trying to keep the tears at bay.

"You got fired from a job you love and its all my fault." A sob escaped her throat as she spoke and she completely broke down, damning herself for being weak.

"Hey, hey, its not your fault." He said as he put his hands on her arms.

"Yes it is. I screwed up and we both got in trouble for it. You have no idea how horrible I feel. I never wanted to get you fired."

"Raleigh, I don't care about that. Yeah, I loved the job but there are others out there. I don't exactly need the money either, so it's not so bad."

"It's the point of it. I have done nothing but horrible things since I got here." He couldn't stand to see her so upset, watching her cry. All he wanted to do was take her inside himself and protect her from the world. So he did the next best thing and wrapped his arms around her, letting her cry on his chest.

"Listen to me, Raleigh Jean. You made a couple bad choices. Everyone has. But I don't care about all that. I know who the real you is." After a few minutes of uncontrolled sobbing, Raleigh got herself together and backed up, wiping her eyes and cheeks dry.

"I don't deserve you." She let out a strangled laugh. "I think I'm going to go away for a while. Not just Christmas, but next semester too."

"Raleigh, you shouldn't run away. It won't solve anything."

"I know that, Dan. But I don't think I can go back into that school being known as the girl who slept with her teacher for a higher grade."

"Why should it matter what they say? We know the truth." All Raleigh could do was shake her head. He wouldn't understand how she felt. How could he? It wasn't his fault all this happened. The guilt she felt was so overpowering. Running away felt like the only option she had.

"What is the truth?" She said quietly, unable to look into his eyes after what she'd done.

"The truth is that I love you." Finally meeting his penetrating green eyes, Raleigh felt her heart thunder in her chest. "I'm in love with you, Raleigh."

Shaking her head, Raleigh denied it. He couldn't love her. Nobody could. "You can't be." She whispered, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

She felt his hand under her chin and he gently lifted her face to meet his gaze once again. She was surprised when she saw the unshed tears there. "I am. I know the real you and I love you for who that is. I love you for all the things that you are and all the things you want to be."

Shaking her head, Raleigh closed her eyes, letting out a sob. He couldn't love her. He just couldn't.

Letting go of her chin, Dan cleared his throat, straightening. She'd obviously said what she had to. "Where will you go?"

"Back home, to Shelby."

"So that's it then? You're just going to run away?" She heard the emotion crack in his voice and she fought to not run into his arms and kiss him, telling him she wasn't going anywhere without him. But she couldn't. She had to get away. "Raleigh, I don't want you to go. I want you to stay here, with me."

Putting a hand on his cheek, Raleigh felt the tingles at the back of her throat once again. "I have to go. I'm sorry." She placed one last soft kiss on his lips before wrapping her arms aro

"Oh my God, you guys! I cannot believe you're here!" Closing her eyes, Raleigh reveled in the feel of Carly's comforting embrace. After holding her for just a few moments, Carly pulled away and took Raleigh's hands in her own.

"Look at you! You cut off your hair!"

"I did! Look at you! You're growing yours out for the first time in what? Six years?"

"Something like that." Carly admitted with a laugh. Raleigh felt herself smile a real heart-felt smile for the first time in what felt like weeks, and it felt really good.

"Are you done hogging the girl or can we have some lovin' too?" Raleigh turned away from Carly and smiled at Justin as he held his arms out to her. Wasting no time, she ran to him, allowing him to wrap his arms around her. "We've missed you, Ray."

"I've missed you too, so much." Letting go of Justin, Raleigh turned to the last surprise guest.

"Hey Bobbie."

"Hey there little sis." Rolling her eyes, Raleigh retorted with the normal, "by five minutes," and jumped into his arms, unable to hide the smile that seemed so foreign to her lately. "how are you doing? Really?"

"So much better now that you guys are here." Raleigh forced herself to let go of her other half and turned back to everyone. "I'm so sorry. Everyone, this is my roommate, Autumn. Autumn this is Carly, Justin and my brother, Bobbie."

"The better half." Bobbie winked at her as he took her hand to shake it.

"We'll see about that. It's nice to meet you all finally."

"And you." Autumn hadn't missed the appreciative tone in his voice as he looked her up and down. Raleigh cleared her throat noisily before addressing her friends once again.

"So why are you all here? Bobbie, don't you have a final left to take?"

"Nope. Sure don't." The way he'd rushed out the words and refused to meet her gaze had Raleigh doubting the sincerity of his words.

"Robert, tell me you did not blow of a final exam to come here."

"Ray, you're my twin sister and therefore one half of me. I needed to make sure you were all right with my own eyes." Just as quickly as the seriousness had come into his voice, it was gone again. He smiled devilishly at her before putting his hands into his pockets. "Besides, you know as well as I do that anything Mom says is complete shit."

"Speaking of the ice queen, she know you left?"

"Well, given the five-minute lecturing voicemail she left me on my phone when she and Dad got home yesterday, I'd assume yes."

"They've been home for two days, Bobbie. Why did she wait to call and bitch until yesterday?"

"I made Janie, Alan, and Nick swear not to tell them. Wasn't so hard. They wanted to come but couldn't get off work and well, there just wasn't room for the ass squad." Raleigh just laughed and shook her head.

"So really, what are ya'll doing here?" Carly went to her and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Well, we came to save you from all this LA craziness and take you back home. And if you put up a fight we fully planned on kidnapping you." Carly let out a laugh before looking pointedly at the open baggage on Raleigh's bed. "But seeing the state your things are in, I'd assume its safe to say you wouldn't put up much resistance."

"Definitely not. Besides, a road trip with you guys sounds much better than a five hour flight home."

"Glad you see it our way." Bobbie said as he bounced onto Raleigh's bed, throwing her clothes to the floor from the movement.

"Bobbie!"

"What? Get packing. We leave in an hour. Hour and a half at the most."

Mouth gaping, Raleigh just stared at her brother as if he were an alien. "You guys just got here. You already want to head back out on the road?"

"Actually, we've been here for a few hours now. We saw the Hollywood sign, grabbed some breakfast in the heart of LA and went to the beach." Justin smiled at her like a child. She knew he'd always wanted to go to LA.

"Yeah, we were not leaving here until I could at least say I got to see the Pacific."

"Wow. In a few hours you've managed to do more than I have the entire time I've been here." Everyone figured that was more of a rhetorical statement rather than she expected a response so they remained silent.

Clearing her throat, Carly decided to break the silence. "Do you want help packing?"

Looking at her clothes that were sprawled all over the place, Raleigh nodded. "Sure. Can you unhook my laptop and put it in its bag? It's under the desk."

"Ok."

Justin and Bobbie offered to help her pack away her shoes and the other oddities she'd brought with her and within a half hour they were completely finished with the chore.

Looking around the room one final time to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything, Raleigh was surprised to feel herself fill with sadness. She had to remind herself that she'd wanted to leave. It's what was best, after all.

Before picking up her bags, Raleigh went over to Autumn and wrapped her arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"Thank you for everything, Autumn." Closing her eyes, Autumn willed away the tears.

"Ditto. Promise me you'll keep in touch?"

"Of course." Pulling away from the embrace, Raleigh looked at her newest, closest friend. "Maybe you can come visit me in Millington?"

"I would really like that."

Raleigh forced a smile and gave a half shrug. "Well I guess, goodbye."

Nodding her head, Autumn whispered, "Bye." and watched as they picked up Raleigh's things and headed out, ready for the long trip back home.

As Bobbie and Justin loaded Raleigh's bags into the back of Justin's Jeep Grand Cherokee, Raleigh turned and gave the dormitories one last look. This was her last day in LA, her last day as a student of Hollywood Academy of Music. She felt incredibly sad, but incredibly relieved as well.

Perhaps this really was best for her.
"Ray, you ready?" Looking back to Carly, Raleigh nodded her head before opening the back passenger door and getting in next to her best friend. "Are you going to be ok?"

Giving Carly a small smile, Raleigh just nodded her head. "I'm going to be fine." And she truly believed it.

Raleigh didn't know how long they'd been driving, was it an hour? Five? But she noticed that suddenly the sky was dark and the stars and moon were shining brightly in the sky, showing the forever long horizon. Suddenly she felt different. Whether it was the promise of tomorrow, or the beauty of the stars shining brightly in the velvet sky, she didn't know, but she felt as though she were ready to face another day. She felt as though she could get through another day without crying.

Maybe this was all she'd needed all along. Her friends, her family.

Maybe I'm going to make it, after all.

After driving for about another hour, Justin finally pulled into the parking lot of a gas station and they all got out, fully ready to stretch their legs and empty their overly full bladders. Carly let Raleigh go to the bathroom to relieve herself first so when she was done, she walked around the small gas station looking at the various kinds of food that could kill you within a few years and eventually gave up on finding anything she really wanted to snack on. When she came to the counter, he eyes landed on the many different kinds of cigarettes lining the wall and she sighed longingly. Looking around herself, she made sure she was alone before she asked for a pack of Marlboro Smooths. After proving to the cashier that she actually was of age, she paid for her guilty pleasure and hid them in her purse before heading back out to the car to wait for her friends.

She had only been standing there for a few minutes, bopping her head to an imaginary beat, when Justin and Carly caught her eye. She pushed herself away from the Jeep and couldn't help but to laugh at her best friend's words.

"Seriously Justin, you do not need that much junk food!"

"Seriously Carly," Justin mimicked her. "Do you remember how long this trip is? I need my previsions."

Grabbing the first thing Carly could get to she held it out in front of him. "Peanut M&M's are previsions?"

"Hey, give those back! I'm a growing boy."

"You're nineteen, Baby. I think you're about done growing. But the boy part? Yeah, completely true."

"Why thank you." Justin took her words as a compliment until their true meaning sunk in. "Wait, what?"

Carly and Raleigh could only laugh as they waited for Bobbie to finish cashing out. When he finally emerged from the gas station holding the same things as Justin, Carly just shook her head.

"Ya know, Ray, if I ate that shit I'd blow up like a balloon."

"Guys have no idea how great they have it."

"Girl, you are preaching to the choir." Raleigh smiled at Carly before looking to Justin and Bobbie.

"You guys ready now?"

Bobbie stopped and took a second to look at everything in his bags. "Yup, I think I'm good. Oh, Ray I got you a fast break."

"Yummy, thanks." She held out her hands as Bobbie tossed her the candy bar.

After driving with no sound other than the hum of the engine and the music coming from the radio for a half hour, Justin decided it was time they play a game. "Alright you guys, plates?"

"Mm, no. I spy."

"Carly, that's completely childish."

"Oh looks who's talking, Bobbie." Raleigh retorted, throwing an empty pop bottle at his head.

"I hate to inform you, dear sister, but I am all man." Raleigh's laugh was cut off by a loud choking sound coming from Carly.

"Bobbie, you really shouldn't make someone laugh when they're drinking. Don't you know it's rude to make a girl spew coke out of her nose?"

"Always the comedian."

"Ok you guys, how about the radio game?"

"No, Ray, nobody can ever beat you!"

"That is not true!" Raleigh defended herself. "It's practically impossible to know every single song ever made."

"Yeah but you're pretty damn close." Sighing animatedly, Raleigh rolled her eyes and gave up the fight before it could start.

"Fine then. What game would you like to play, oh holy one?"

"Ok, we'll play the radio game, but if you get every single one right for ten minutes, we're playing something else. Deal?"

"Fine by me. Let's start." Turning around back to the radio, Bobbie put his hand on the dial before asking if everyone was ready. When he got their yes' he began to turn. When the first song they came to began blaring through the speakers, Bobbie stopped and waited to see if he knew just what the melody playing was.

Before even ten seconds passed, Raleigh called out, "You Oughta Know, Alanis Morrissette."

"Come on, see?! You're starting already!"

"Bobbie, you are such a baby! That one was so easy! Why don't you actually give me a challenge?"

"Well I'm sorry, my dear sister, but I don't control what they play on the air." turning back to the radio, Bobbie turned until he came to the next song playing.

Only a few seconds had passed before Justin smacked the steering wheel and yelled out, "Fire Of Unknown Origin, B-O-C!"

"Oh, looks like Ray's got some competition." Carly teased.

"Well, its about time."

"Ok, ok can we keep going please?"

"Don't be a sore loser already, Ray." Bobbie smiled at his sister before turning the dial once again.

They were playing for nearly an hour, the score tied between Bobbie and Carly with three each, Justin was in second with twelve, and Raleigh was of course winning with fifteen, when the next song that Bobbie found to play made Raleigh's good mood go sour. She'd been so happy, smiling and laughing with her friends, having a great time when that song had begun to play. Why did she have to be a musician? Why did she have to associate everything with a certain song?

Why couldn't she let go? Must he constantly plague her mind? She left him behind, she'd intended to move on, but now she couldn't shake thoughts of their short time spent together from her mind. All she could think of was his smile, his long, slightly curled brown hair, his deep green eyes that seemed to see right into your soul. All she could feel were his arms around her, holding her to him tight. The arms that she might never feel around her again.

Why was this so hard?

She'd known Dan only a little over three months. She shouldn't feel this strongly for him. No, it was all in her head. She liked him sure, but they could never really be together. Not like she and Josh had been. Not like she knew he wanted and deserved. He was, after all, twenty four and she barely eighteen. Her leaving was for the best.

But still, as the song continued to play, she couldn't help but to think of that first morning she'd woken in his bed and went downstairs to find him singing and bopping his head to this song. It was the first time since she'd been in LA that she'd truly smiled.

~*~

Grabbing the blue shirt Dan had thrown on the chair, Raleigh threw it on and made her way downstairs and into the kitchen where he was cooking breakfast. She tried not to laugh as she watched him bop his head and sing along to the radio. Hearing him try to reach the high notes of the song as he moved around was just too much.

"REO Speedwagon?" Seeing the startled expression on his face caused her to burst out laughing.

"Damn straight, REO. You have any objections?"

"No, not at all. I just wasn't aware that men liked them too."

"Well, lucky for you I'm comfortable enough in my sexuality to admit that I like some heart felt music." He said, wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing her lightly on the lips. "Good morning, beautiful."

"Good morning." And good is just what it was.

~*~

"Ray?" Hearing Carly's voice, Raleigh forced her thoughts away.

"Yeah?" Raleigh asked, wiping away any trace of tears that might have built up in her eyes before turning to face them.

"You know every single REO Speedwagon song ever recorded. Why did you not jump at this one?"

"I just got lost in my thoughts. Can you turn it off, Bobbie?"

"Ray, you love this song. Why..."

"Just turn it off! Ok?" Raleigh hadn't meant to snap at her brother, but she couldn't take the heart felt lyrics anymore. She couldn't take her happy memories anymore. She felt like she was slowly losing her mind the more she thought of Dan. This wasn't the way to get over him and forget all about the three and a half months she'd spent in LA.

After a short silence, Justin cleared his throat and spoke, changing the subject. "It's getting pretty late. The next city is Flagstaff, Arizona. Sound ok to stay the night there?"

Bobbie and Carly said that it would be fine for the night while Raleigh continued to stare out at the scenery passing her by.

After getting off their exit nearly an hour later, they didn't see the hotel so Justin decided he would just pull into the first gas station he came to and while he was filling up the car someone could go in and ask for directions.

Having to stretch her legs, Raleigh elected to go inside and ask.

"The comfort inn? Yeah, when you leave here, turn right onto South Milton and keep going down until the bend, there it turns into East Santa Fe Avenue. It'll be right there on your left, just after North Humphrey."

"Thank you so much."

"My pleasure little lady." The old man winked at her and gave her a toothless grin and Raleigh felt incredibly uncomfortable. Slowly walking away, she just offered him a polite smile before turning and walking faster out of the small gas station.

"Ok, next time we need directions anywhere, you guys are going in to ask. I've been creeped out enough by the hillbilly guy to last me a lifetime."

"What's the matter, Ray? I thought you liked older guys. Oh no, wait, it's the old wrinkly balls, isn't it?"

Stopping dead in her tracks, Raleigh just looked at her brother with her mouth gaping wide open.

"You should shut your mouth. Wouldn't want bugs to take up campgrounds in there."

Going over to Bobbie, Raleigh raised her fist and punched him in his arm. "You're such an ass."

"Ow, Raleigh Jean, that hurt!" Bobbie's face scrunched up in pain as he rubbed the spot that had connected with her fist.

"Well you shouldn't say such insensitive things to your baby sister. Besides, all the funny that joke may have held on Thanksgiving was washed right out the second I left Dan." Giving Bobbie one more dirty look, Raleigh threw open her door to the car and got in, slamming it shut behind her.

"Woah! No matter what your deal is please, do not take it out on my baby!" Justin said, flailing his arms in the air for emphasis. Carly's window was open so Raleigh called out an apology to Justin before resuming her silence.

The ten minute ride to the hotel was uncomfortably quiet and Carly and Raleigh checked them into a room while the boys grabbed their bags, ready to lug them up to what ever room they were given. After getting the room keys, they all found their way to the room and they all decided to settle into a game of crazy eights. After a few rounds of that they decided to switch to nine hole golf. When they came to the eighth hole, Carly insisted Justin was cheating and they all decided to call it a night.

After putting on their pajamas, they decided who was sleeping with who since there were only two queen beds.

"Carly, you and Justin can have that bed and I guess me and my evil twin get this one. Wouldn't want the guys sharing a bed."

"God no, they'll complain about it all night and all the way home." Carly laughed as they settled into their beds. They lied there awake for a little while just talking some more until eventually, they all heard Bobbie's soft snores. Then Carly fell into unconsciousness and then finally, Justin.

Raleigh lied there for a long time, exactly how long she didn't know, but she did know that no matter how hard she tried, or how badly she wanted it, she wasn't going to get to sleep. Not with her mind racing the way it was. Deciding the only way she'd get her thoughts to stop, or at least slow, was to put them onto paper. Raleigh slowly rolled out of bed as to not disturb her brother, and she went over to her suitcase. After taking out her high school hoodie and throwing it on over her tank top and sliding her feet into her fuzzy red slippers, she grabbed her little notebook and pen out of her purse.

After setting it down, she was fully planning on just leaving when something caught her eye. Opening her purse back up, she looked down at the pack of Marlboros in there. Deciding one might help calm her, she grabbed the pack, along with her lighter, and then headed out the door after grabbing a key.

Once she got to the pool area, Raleigh sat at a table and, after lighting a cigarette and taking a long, much needed, drag, she opened her notebook and uncapped her pen.

She didn't know how long she'd been sitting there, but she'd smoked three of her smooths and had finished three verses of a song she didn't know she'd be writing. She noticed that somehow after her last verse she'd begun writing the lyrics to the REO Speedwagon song she'd heard earlier in the car.

Maybe this was getting to her far worse than she'd ever imagined. Is this how Dan was feeling at that very moment? Left there in his large, lonely home afraid to do anything because it would make the fact that she'd left that much more real? Was he shedding the tears he hadn't shed when she said her goodbyes? Was he cursing the fact that she'd ever walked into his classroom at the end of August?

Had he already gotten over her?

Feeling the tears welling in her eyes again, Raleigh closed them and tried to rub the unshed tears away.

"What is wrong with me? He doesn't love me." Shaking her head, Raleigh whispered her next words of denial. "I don't love him."

"You don't sound too sure of that."

Whipping her head up to the sound of the unfamiliar voice, Raleigh was shocked to see that she no longer was alone on the patio.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to frighten you."

Shaking her head while wiping her eyes, Raleigh let out a small laugh. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was speaking out loud."

The handsome man shrugged as he smiled at her. Raleigh couldn't help but feel as if she knew him from somewhere. "It's alright. In all fairness you did think you were alone. Mind if I join you?" He motioned towards the table and when Raleigh shook her head he immediately sat down. "So, boy trouble?"

"You might say that." Raleigh felt her guard go up and she knew he noticed it.

"I'm sorry, it's not my place and I shouldn't have been eavesdropping. Well, really I wasn't eavesdropping, I was just surprised that the first words you'd spoke since I've been out here were to yourself." Against her better judgment, Raleigh felt herself laugh. Suddenly it clicked in her head just who this guy was and why he seemed so familiar.

"Hey, you're Martin Johnson, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I am. Fan?" Was that modesty in his eyes? Or fright at having been recognized by a maybe-fan?

"You might say that." Picking up her pack of cigarettes, Raleigh pulled out her fourth and lit it. She offered one to Martin and he took one with a smile.

"Shouldn't smoke. These things will kill you." He said the words as he put the end in his mouth and picked up her lighter and lit it.

"Hypocrite."

"Guilty." He leaned back in his chair and blew out the smoke. "Millington High, huh? You're a long way from home."

"I've been in LA."

"Oh yeah? How did you like it there?"

"Uh, well, it definitely had its ups and downs. I'm ready to go home now."

"Yeah, there's no place like home. How long were you there?"

"End of August. I was going to the Hollywood Academy Of Music." Raleigh didn't really know what to make of Martin's facial expression so she just sat there, waiting for him to say something. He looked as if he'd been shocked.

"You're Raleigh Coons! I knew you looked familiar. Your hair had me thrown for a loop."

"Ok, how do you know who I am?" To say that she was a little surprised that he knew who she was would have been a huge understatement.

"Let's just say I'm a Rent fan."

"Oh." Raleigh couldn't hide the surprise in her voice.

"Yeah, the guys make fun of me for it, but in all fairness I did take my sister. She really wanted to see it and she couldn't fly to New York for the Broadway show. And I have to tell you, you made an amazing Mimi."

"Well, thank you, Martin." He just smiled at her before looking down to the notebook she was picking at.

"Writing a song?"

Biting her lip, Raleigh took a minute to answer him. "Kind of. Well, it started out that way then went horribly wrong."

"I'm sure you're just being modest. You seemed to be a very talented young lady. Can I see?"

"Uh, no." Raleigh felt herself smiling at him. "Like I said, it started out as a song I'm writing but then turned into the song I've had on my mind for a while now." She had a feeling she knew why it had turned into Don't Wanna Lose You just after she'd written "but they don't know the truth."

Did she even know the truth? She could only think of how she'd asked Dan what the truth was just yesterday. He'd told her the truth was that he loved her. She refused to believe he actually did.

Martin only raised his eyebrow at her before quickly grabbing the notebook out of her grasp. Opening it, he fought off Raleigh as she tried to grab it back.

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling

But nothing's greater than the risk
That comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy
Maybe, Maybe

But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth

You left this morning on an early plane
You left your picture behind to haunt me
You left in a steady rain
You say you'll miss me, say you want me

I'm left this mornin with a world of doubt
I'm left this mornin indecently exposed
So much we never did talk about
And your kiss goodbye, said the case is closed

I don't want to lose you
I don't want to lose the best love that I've ever found
Don't want to lose you
Why didn't I cry when you said goodbye
Why didn't I break down, break down and say
I don't want to lose you

When he was done reading the lyrics she had scrawled out onto the paper, he looked at Raleigh with a raised eyebrow once again.

"REO Speedwagon?"

"Yes, REO. Do you have a problem with that? And I'm surprised you even know who they are."

"Are you kidding? My mom loves Kevin Cronin. Says he sings it from the heart."

"I happen to agree."

"Please. He sings it from the hair, there's a difference." After giving the lyrics she'd written one more look over, he closed the notebook and handed it back to her. "Your lyrics are actually really good. You have some serious talent."

"You can gather that from two verses that aren't even close to being called lyrics?"

"Yes, I can." Putting out his burned down cigarette, Martin put his elbows on the table and leaned forward. "So why did you really leave the academy?"

Looking down at the table, Raleigh began picking at the cover of her notebook again. "A lot of stuff went down over the past week that I just needed to get away from. So my friends came to get me and I made the great escape." Raleigh couldn't help the smile that formed on her lips. "Pun intended."

"That's funny, really." Looking at his watch, Martin let out a curse.

"What?"

"It's almost three AM. I have to be up by six to drive to Phoenix." Standing up, Martin held out his hand to Raleigh. "It was nice talking to you, Raleigh Coons."

"And you, Martin Johnson."

"I'll see you around."

"Sure." When he was back inside the hotel, Raleigh shook her head. "You're a celebrity. Sure you'll see me around." After gathering her things, Raleigh decided to head back up to the room and try to get some sleep. She had a long day ahead of her. Best to at least try to get some rest.

*Lyrics from Bleeding Love By Leona Lewis & I Don't Want To Lose You By REO Speedwagon

Or maybe she was the one who had changed.

Feeling a hand on her shoulder, Raleigh looked to her left and saw Carly smiling at her.

"Welcome home, Ray." Raleigh managed to smile back at her although she didn't feel so welcome here anymore. She had wanted to leave LA and come home, but now that she was here she felt like all she wanted was to run back.

Into Dan's waiting arms.

But was he really there at home, waiting for her to realize she'd made a mistake and run back to him? No, he wouldn't be. Therefore she had to be strong. This was home after all. And no matter what she'd ever said, she loved it here.

Raleigh watched as they passed the large Weeping Willow as they turned onto Hill Street, and there it was. Her large white house, sitting there in its place as it always had been. Stone walkway leading up from the street to the stone steps, the large oak tree off to the left, hovering over the driveway, a tire swing hanging from one of the thick branches. Justin rolled to a stop in the street and as everyone got out, Raleigh felt her eyes wander towards the large bay window to the right of the front door. The glow from the television was all that lit the living room and she had a feeling her father had fallen asleep watching late night re-runs of M*A*S*H again. The familiarity of it all brought a smile to her lips.

Turning back to the Jeep, Raleigh took her bags from Justin and set them on the ground before wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Thank you for taking your new baby out to save me."

"Anything for you, Raleigh Jean." His voice was low and sincere and Raleigh had missed it. She'd missed him. Pulling away from Justin's embrace, Raleigh moved to Carly.

"Call me tomorrow, let me know how everything goes."

"It is tomorrow."

"Shut up." Carly pulled away from Raleigh's hug and lightly hit her on the shoulder. "you know what I mean."

"I do and I will." Backing away, Raleigh picked up her bags and waved to them as best as she could. "I'll see you guys later. Thanks again."

"Bye guys." Bobbie waved to them before putting an arm around his sister's shoulders as they walked up towards their home. "You ready for this?"

"Not even close." Raleigh shook her head as a small laugh escaped her throat.

"Well, it's late so I doubt the ice queen is up. At least you might be able to get some sleep before enduring her wrath."

"Yeah right. As soon as we walk through that door she'll be down our throats. Me with ‘I told you so's' and you for leaving school."

"True." Bobbie stopped walking and looked at the house as if in deep thought. "What do you say we go to the hotel for the night?"

"Come on, Bobbie. If anyone should be saying that its me. You'll be fine."

"Alright, but you should know I'm holding you personally responsible for my death." Raleigh rolled her eyes but felt herself laugh none-the-less as they continued up the walkway. Bobbie pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. After they got inside, Raleigh took off her shoes and wandered into the living room to see if it was in fact her father in there.

Her lips curled up in a warm smile when her lilac eyes took in her dad's frame sprawled out on his favorite recliner, a glass half-full of ginger-ale on the table beside him, Klinger on the television screen talking about his continuous fight to get discharged from the army.

Going over to her father, Raleigh bent down and placed her lips on his forehead. "Goodnight, Daddy." She whispered to him before going back to grab her bags and together, she and her twin went upstairs to get some much needed sleep. Tomorrow was a new day, and hopefully it would be better than today.

---

It was nearly one o'clock before Raleigh awoke. After showering and dressing, she found the courage to go downstairs and face her mother. But when she got downstairs the only person she found was Janie.

"Where is everyone?" Looking up from her papers on the kitchen counter, Janie was surprised to see her little sister standing in the doorway, asking her a question as if she hadn't been gone for over three months.

"At the café. Mom and Bobbie got into a huge argument about him skipping one of his finals and then she and Dad got into it when he defended Bobbie and then they all made up and left to open shop. It is so good to see you." All the while she'd been talking she'd been walking towards her and immediately wrapped her arms around her in a tight embrace. Letting go of Raleigh, Janie put one hand on her shoulder and used the other to brush her hair away from her face. "From what mom said about your eye I was expecting this big nasty ugly bruise but I don't see anything. But hey, that's good isn't it? How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine." Raleigh couldn't help but to smile a little at her sister's rushed words. Janie always spoke fast when she was upset or nervous.

Letting go of her sister, Janie went back to the papers that had held her attention before Raleigh had walked in. "Did they catch that bastard?"

"Uh, no. Last I heard he was on the run. Didn't even tell his dad, the only family he has in the states, where he was going or what he'd done. So why didn't you go with them to the cafe?" Now it was Raleigh's turn to speak fast.

"I'm going to after I finish up this paperwork. I could have done it there but it's not like I could really concentrate with all of the noise. I'll be done in a few minutes, do you want to head over there with me?"

"Uh, yeah, maybe." going over to the fridge, Raleigh pulled out the milk then proceeded to find some cereal she wanted to eat. "Uh, Janie?"

"Mm?"

Feeling a little hesitant to ask, Raleigh took a breath and asked. It's not like asking was really going to hurt her. "Did Josh come back from New York yet?"

Lifting her head up once again, Janie raised an eyebrow at her. "Yeah, he got in just a couple hours after Bobbie, Justin and Carly left for LA. You haven't spoken to him I take it?"

Raleigh only shook her head as she sat at the table and took a bite of her Fruit Loops.

"Ray, you need to talk to him. I don't think the boy has the faintest clue as to what you've been going through."

"Janie, last I knew you hated him."

"Well, last I knew you loved him and promised him you'd be together when you could be." She retorted.

Touché.

"Well, I'm just a little confused about everything right now. I just need some time to think. I think I at least deserve that much."

"Take all the time you need, Ray. But just remember, he's not going to wait around forever, especially when I'm sure he knows you're back home now." Janie watched as her sister began playing with her cereal and knew her appetite had just fled. Deciding to change the subject, hopefully for the better, Janie cleared her throat before asking, "So, who is this guy that Mom was in such a flourish about when they got back from LA?"

Raising her gaze to Janie, Raleigh furrowed her eyebrows. "Please tell me she wasn't bad mouthing him."

"Not at first. But then she got onto talking about how I guess he stood up to her about you and really let her have it, and while Dad was grinning like the Cheshire cat, Mom was fuming. Personally, I give this guy a lot of credit for not cowering to her."

Raleigh rolled her eyes as she stood and poured her cereal into the sink. "Please, like you've ever needed to cower to her. You can do no wrong in her eyes, remember?"

"My dear sister, she only thinks I can do no wrong. Or have you forgotten already?" Crossing her arms across her chest, Raleigh sighed.

"Sorry Janie. I forgot that you and I are just so alike."

Detecting the very strong sarcasm in her younger sister's voice, Janie closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. Raleigh has just gotten home and she was finally able to swallow the worry she'd felt over her. Did they constantly have to fight?

"Ray, you've been home for what? Ten hours maybe? Do we really have to fight about nothing again already?"

"Sorry, Janie." And she really meant it. She hadn't intended to go downstairs and pick a fight with her sister but she felt like fighting to defend herself was all that she'd had lately. "You know what? I'm going to go for a walk. I'll meet you at the café in a little while."

"Ok." Walking out of the kitchen, Raleigh went upstairs and put on her boots and jacket before grabbing her purse and heading out into the coldest winter she was sure Tennessee had ever seen.

After nearly an hour and a half of walking aimlessly, Raleigh realized she'd taken the long route to Oak Park, where she'd played for hours on end as a child with all of her friends. A canal ran through the far end of the park and a large dock hung over the water's surface. As Raleigh began walking through the park towards said canal, she couldn't help but to think about times past. Happier times. Long days spent lazing in the summer's hot sun with her friends, occasionally jumping into the cool water to play a game of chicken, or to just cool off. She wished she could go back. Back to when things were easy, back to when everything made sense.

Back to when she, Carly, Josh, Justin, Mandy, Joey, Chris, and Bobbie were all the best of friends and she knew that she and Josh were meant for one another. When everyone knew that they'd be together forever. Before all the drama that her life had become. Before Josh had left Shelby and broken up with her, before her grandmother had died, leaving her crushed. Before she met Dan and became more confused than she could ever remember being.

All she could think of at that moment was being a carefree twelve year old and playing with her friends in the canal. Not worrying about how dirty the water was or what the hot sun would do to her unprotected skin. Not worrying about what it would be like when Josh broke up with her.

It was another summer, no school for three months, and she and her friends were having the time of their lives. That's all that mattered, wasn't it? Just living for the moment. Just having fun.

That's what it's all about, isn't it?

The summer had just begun and the girls had just planned on coming to the canal and maybe lying together out in the sun, occasionally jumping into the water to cool themselves off. But when they saw Josh and Justin standing at the end of the dock, all plans had changed. Carly knew neither of the boys were paying attention to what was behind them, all that mattered was what was already in the water.

Or who rather.

Taking off their tank tops and shorts, leaving them clad in their brand new bikinis that they'd just had to have, the girls put their towels and clothes with their shoes in a pile on a large rock before together they bolted down the dock, jumping onto the two "innocent" boys, knocking them into the water.

When Carly and Raleigh emerged from the water's depths, they could only laugh as they watched Josh and Justin come up sputtering out water they'd swallowed.

"That was so not funny!" Justin yelled between breaths.

"Actually, I thought it was pretty hilarious." Raleigh said, treading water.

"You would!" Josh said, splashing Raleigh in the face.

"Well you would have heard us running down the dock if you two weren't drooling over the Pinkleton sluts." Carly said as she stuck her tongue out in distaste.

"Jealous, Carly?" Justin wiggled his eyebrows at her and she splashed him in the face, eliciting a laugh from him.

"And just what would I have to be jealous of? The diseases they're going to contract one day? No thank you."

As Carly and Justin bickered back and forth, Josh took the time to draw Raleigh closer to him.

"Neither of those girls has anything on you, Ray."

"You have to say that ‘cause you're stuck with me for life." Raleigh tried to pout but failed miserably, smiling brilliantly as she felt Josh's arms around her waist beneath the water.

"No. I'm stuck with you forever and I couldn't be happier about that." Raleigh melted into him as she felt his young lips upon her own.

The moment only lasted a moment before Justin and Carly interrupted them, but it was one of the greatest moments she could remember.

She'd always been a firm believer in not living in the past, but living for the future, but as of right now, living in the past was all that she felt like she had. She had no idea as to what the future held for her and she no longer felt like she knew what she wanted. Like she didn't know what mattered anymore.

Raleigh knew she still wanted to write music, but did she really want to be a singer? Sure she loved it, but she'd been in the limelight for the past few months, and quite frankly, it wasn't for her. She didn't need the stress she now knew it brought. And if when things got rough she felt as though her only option was to run away, how would she ever survive?

Then there was the other question. Her personal love life. Did she love Josh still? Did she love Dan? Did they truly love her and want to be with her? Did she want to be with either of them anymore? Hell, did she even want to be with anyone?

All these questions plagued her mind as she stood there, staring at the old dock and still canal water, thinking about her past and very unsure future. Would she ever know the answers?

Deciding it was time she showed her face at the family café, Raleigh turned and was completely shocked to see Josh standing there, watching her. How long had he been there, watching her mental debate?

"Josh?!" It was both a question and statement. She hadn't expected him to find her so quickly. How had he found her? No one knew where she'd been going.

"Raleigh." His voice was so full of relief, she thought he sounded as if he might explode. When he charged forward and took her in his arms, holding her to him so firmly, Raleigh felt such immense guilt at having kept him in the dark, it was overwhelming. She had to fight back the tears as she wrapped her arms around him, holding him to her. It had been only a month since she'd last held him, and she'd honestly begun feeling as though she didn't need him anymore.

Oh how she'd been wrong.

Nothing had ever felt more right, and she knew right then that she had to be completely honest with him. He deserved to know everything.

Raleigh turned her face into his neck, breathing in his scent. God, how she'd missed him.

"I've missed you so much." Raleigh listened to his shaky voice and knew he was close to breaking down. She wouldn't be able to handle it if he cried in front of her. The guilt was so thick and heavy as it was. She didn't know if she could handle it if she made him cry after everything, as well. "What did I do? Please, Ray. Tell me what I did to have you turn away from me like you did." He pulled away from the embrace and put his hands on her face, looking into her glossy lilac eyes. "What did I do?" His hands were cold on her face and his voice was soft. Closing her eyes was all Raleigh could do to try and stop the tears from falling. Unfortunately, one tear seeped out from beneath her eyelid, followed by a few more and, inevitably, a sob escaped her throat.

"Nothing." She whispered back to him, afraid to look into his tear-rimmed eyes. "You did nothing."

"Then why? Everything was fine when I left LA. What happened?" Josh dropped his hands from her face and took a step back, never allowing his eyes to leave hers.

"Josh," Raleigh tried to strengthen her voice, but she couldn't. She knew she had to tell him everything, the good and the bad, and she knew it was going to be hard. But she never imagined it being this difficult to get the words out. Biting her lip, she tried to gain the courage for what she had to do. "There's some things I need to tell you."

At her soft spoken words, Josh felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. He knew whatever had her ignoring him for that past few weeks couldn't have been good, but nothing could have ever prepared him for what she was about to tell him.

"You know what? I don't care. Anything that might have happened while you were at school, I don't care. We can start over. Justin said you're not going back to LA. Maybe you can come to New York with me or I can move back. I don't need school. I don't want to be an accountant anyway. So just please, whatever it is, don't tell me." Stepping closer to her once again, Josh brushed her bangs out of her eyes. "I love you, Raleigh Jean. Nothing you could say to me will change that." Before Raleigh could say anything, she felt his lips lightly touch hers, slowly moving, urging her to respond. Closing her eyes, Raleigh found it too easy to return the kiss, far too tempting to take him up on starting over.

But she knew she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she continued to run away from her problems.

Reluctantly, Raleigh pulled away from the kiss and rested her forehead on Josh's. She heard his intake of breath and listened for what he was going to say.

"Whatever this is, it's not good is it? It's not as simple as starting over."

Backing up, Raleigh shook her head, forcing herself to look into his blue eyes. "No, it's not."

Sighing, Josh ran his hand through his grown-out hair before turning to sit on the bench a few feet away. Leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, Josh clasped his hands together before looking back up at Raleigh as she stood frozen in place.

"Alright. Go ahead. I'm ready for it." The smile he gave her was weak and forced and yet Raleigh couldn't blame him. He would never be ready for what she had to say.

As she paced back and forth in front of him, Josh waited patiently for her to begin talking.

"I don't really know where to begin."

"The beginning would seem as good a place as any."

As Raleigh continued to pace, she began biting on her thumbnail, contemplating the many ways she could begin.

"Raleigh, calm down. Just tell me." Suddenly Josh became hesitant for a moment before asking, "Does this have to do with that Effron guy?"

Stopping dead in her tracks, Raleigh's eyes darted to look at Josh. "My being in the hospital due to a drug overdose, that had to do with him. Me not being able to sleep without having a nightmare, that has to do with him. THIS has nothing to with him." Her words were sharp and harsh and she felt herself becoming so worked up over what Effron had done to her, she nearly missed the complete look of shock written on his face. "Oh God, Josh, I'm sorry I forgot you didn't know..." In a matter of two seconds, Josh was on his feet and in front of her.

"What did he do to you?" His eyes were fierce and his body rigid, but his voice held nothing but worry and sincerity.

Feeling herself soften, Raleigh just shook her head. She didn't want to relive it again but he had a right to know what she'd been going through. Part of the reason she'd come home. "After I ended things with him, he went a little crazy. Things got out of hand and at Autumn's Christmas party he drugged me and...and I ended up in the hospital. That's about it." Josh noticed how she adverted her eyes after she said he'd drugged her and he knew that she was leaving something out, but he wouldn't push her. Whatever it was that she had to tell him would come on her own terms.

"Alright, I know that's not everything but I'll buy it for now."

Nodding, Raleigh resumed biting her nail. Another bad habit that drove Josh insane. Luckily he said nothing of it. Taking a breath, Raleigh decided to just get it over with. "Josh, while you were in LA, do you remember when you told me about you and Erin?" He nodded and she continued. "I told you that I was a hypocrite because I was doing much worse things. But the only thing I told you about was Effron. There was a lot more." Suddenly, Josh decided he really didn't like where this was going. He'd known that her sleeping with Effron wasn't the only thing she'd been doing. If it had been she wouldn't have been as upset as she had been.

He didn't want to hear everything that she had to tell him, but he knew she had to get it out. Whether it was to make herself feel better or feeling like he deserved to know the truth, he didn't know. But he urged her on.

"The main reason I didn't tell you was because I was so afraid of what you would think of me. I mean, I've always been the good girl. Doing what everyone expects of me, well, except for my mom. Then I went there and...I guess I just lost myself. I missed everyone so much and I wanted everyone to like me there and I turned into someone I've always loathed. I started doing lines of coke and getting drunk all the time and..." Feeling the words catch in her throat, Raleigh tried to take a deep breath. She had to get it all out. She was so close, she couldn't stop now. Running her hand through her disheveled hair, she tried to wipe away the tears before they began falling again. "And I started sleeping with my one instructor. And I couldn't tell you because you respected him. I didn't want to take that away."

Putting his hands in his pockets to try and warm them, Josh looked away from her as he slowly nodded his head. "Cooper, right?" Raleigh nodded and Josh let out a small laugh, unable to believe how things had turned out. Last year, everything had been fine. He and Raleigh had been together, neither having eyes for anyone but each other. Then he broke up with her and everything seems to have gone downhill. Was it all his fault? Was he the one to blame for who Raleigh had become?

"Josh," Raleigh's soft, shaky voice broke through his thoughts and he forced himself to look at the broken girl standing before him. "I didn't sleep with him for a higher grade or something like that. I mainly did it for the conquest." Raleigh let out an incredulous laugh at how big of a slut that made her sound, but she went on. "But somehow, somewhere down the line I fell in love with him. And I didn't realize it until it was too late. He lost the job that he loved, and I came home."

A long silence followed Raleigh's words and Josh tried to find the right words to say. Nothing could describe how he was really feeling at that moment. Hurt? Betrayed? Completely foolish for having thought there was hope for them after everything that had happened?

Raleigh reached into her jeans pocket and pulled something out. Going over to Josh, she grasped his hand and set the object on his palm before curling his fingers over it. Before releasing his hand, Raleigh whispered, "I'm sorry, Josh. For everything."

When she let go of his hand, he slowly uncurled his fingers and there sat the white gold diamond ring he had given her. Immediately his face scrunched up into a mass of tears and he fought to look at Raleigh.

"I was a fool giving you this. We're never going to be together again, are we?" When Raleigh only shook her head, Josh looked away, shoving the ring into his pocket. He turned to walk away but before he did he told her, "I'll always love you, Raleigh Jean." Then he walked away, leaving Raleigh in the middle of the large park alone. She wrapped her arms around herself before fully breaking down into tears.

As sobs wracked her body, she fell to the ground, completely helpless to stop the anguish she felt as it washed over her. No matter what she ever did someone always got hurt.